Naturals: Did you waver in tour decision to transition?

IntelligenceisBeautiful

IntelligenceisBeautiful

New Member
I'm currently transitioning and plan to do so for 2 more months before bc-ing.
About 90% of the time I can't wait to bc, to see my natural hair, just to be natural in general. I've wanted to be natural for some time now, but always decided against it. I love natural hair, I'm always on youtube viewing ppl's natural journies, looking at the natural hair tributes videos etc.

However, there are some days when I'm not so sure. I wonder if it'll look right on me. I worry about other ppl's reaction (in theory I know I shouldn't care, but I do). Also, as a young single woman I honestly do wonder about how men will receive my natural hair.......can anyone relate?
 
Yeah, I did for a total of 11 months. I knew I didn't want to big chop with a limited amount of hair on my head as I don't feel I look right with really short hair as my head is huge!:lol: You're going to go through a phase where it will look bad before it gets better. I had about 3-6 inches in certain places when I big chopped. I then kept it in protective styles and updated ever once in a while when I was curious about my length. The deciding factor in me deciding to transition was because I was tired of scheduling dates for a relaxer and having thin end even after I had permed. I also have medium fine hair so the relaxer was killing what otherwise healthy hair I figured I could be having if I was natural.

As far as what other people might think...to hell with them. It simply amazes me how our own people tend to look negatively upon our kinky hair. My SO acted like he had a problem with it at first but now he has made strides in his acceptance of it......he has no other choice because I'm not changing it.
 
I BC'd after like 3 weeks of so called transitioning. I didnt feel it was worth the time and hassle of dealing with multiple textures. Chopped down to like a quarter of an inch.
 
I was afraid at first. I thought men would not like me because it is short and curly. Much to my surprise, they liked it. However there are times I miss relaxed hair because I do think I got more attention when it was longer and freshly relaxed.

The first three months of being a natural I felt uncomfortable when I was around other black women with relaxed hair. I felt like an oddball. There were times I would stare at the boxes of relaxer at the store.

Now I don't care as much to what other people think. I was able to reduce my three minute relaxer stare down to three seconds.
 
I gave up after my first attempt to go natural. I didn’t feel like dealing with the two different textures since I always used to get my hair done in really cute styles. I was also discouraged by the fact that my hair was pretty long and it would take a while to achieve that length again. The second time I just didn’t give a crap about wearing pony tails all the time. I’m all natural and if I straighten my hair is very close to the length it was before. I’m glad I did it. :yep:
 
Yep. :yep: I think we all do at some point. It's a big step. Bigger than just physically chopping the hair off.

The day after I BCed I went and got a weave. I had already made the appt earlier that week before I even knew I was going to cut my hair. I didn't regret after I did it but at the same time I didn't feel comfortable wearing it out just yet. I had gotten to the point where I hadn't been wearing my hair straight for over a year and I liked the texture of my new growth. I was tired of paying out the behind for big curly/bushy hair when I could just grow my own. So I figured if I chopped, nobody would ever know since I kept it covered up all the time anyway.

I wore the weave for a month and when I took it down my hair had grown quite a bit in that short amount of time. Once I saw that growth, I realized there was no turning back to the relaxer. That was it for me. My hair stayed the same length for a long time when I was relaxed. It did start to get healthier and finally start growing once I started taking better care of it but not any noticeable growth like that.

I wore weaves for a while and I think I wore my hair out for the first time maybe 6 months after I chopped it. It definitely took some time to get used to it. I didn't start wearing it out regularly til this past summer. I've finally come to love it. I still may not wear it out every day but I'm finally content with it. I went through the whole not thinking it was attractive thing but I got over it. But believe it or not, now I get more compliments on my hair (usually when it's in a wash and go) than I have on any of my other hair styles ever. As much as I fought it, I've come to the realization that it's a good look for me. If only I could get some length now. :rolleyes: :lol: But that's a whole other can of worms.
 
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my first transition started in late 2004 (and went into july 2005)
i broke down and decided to relax
after months of trying
to move into the natural world

i felt really bad about doing it
and promised myself (the same day i did the relaxer lol)
would definitely be the last one
i started the transition over again
and chopped 4 months later.

my 2 year anni is in november
oh snap!

best wishes with your haiiiiiiiir!
 
I didn't waver because I didn't have a choice in the matter. I decided to get highlights and my beautician used bleach. When touch-up time came, she told me the real deal. My hair could possibly break off if we do a relaxer. So, began my journey to au naturalle!

It was definitely rough in the beginning but I adjusted pretty quick. My beautician made the transition very easy.

I think it's more psychological than anything. When you're subconsciously told most of your life that "nappy" hair is bad, it can take a toll on you. Let yourself have a bad day. That's O.K. After that, keep it movin'!
 
I wavered a few times, but I would always look at someone who was at a goal I was trying to reach and then my determination (some call stubbornness) would kick in and I would be back on the path to naturalness.

It comes with the territory, there will be some days when you are completely natural that you may even think about going back to a relaxer but if your goal is for natural from now until forever, those days will pass and you will continue on the natural path.

It is part of the natural journey.
 
IntelligenceisBeautiful said:
I'm currently transitioning and plan to do so for 2 more months before bc-ing.
About 90% of the time I can't wait to bc, to see my natural hair, just to be natural in general. I've wanted to be natural for some time now, but always decided against it. I love natural hair, I'm always on youtube viewing ppl's natural journies, looking at the natural hair tributes videos etc.

However, there are some days when I'm not so sure. I wonder if it'll look right on me. I worry about other ppl's reaction (in theory I know I shouldn't care, but I do). Also, as a young single woman I honestly do wonder about how men will receive my natural hair.......can anyone relate?
Click to expand...

I'm exactly where you are now, and I'm also transitioning. If you want to be transition buddies, I'm in!
 
Zsazsa6275 said:
I think it's more psychological than anything. When you're subconsciously told most of your life that "nappy" hair is bad, it can take a toll on you. Let yourself have a bad day. That's O.K. After that, keep it movin'!
Click to expand...

This is very true!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
No, I didn't waver. I did waver on "when" I was going to do the BC because I kept pushing it back (wanting more new growth versus just wanting to get it over with).

I'd been relaxed so long that I was looking forward to the change. It was weird and nerve racking for about a week after the BC, I think. I'd never had hair that short, and it felt really odd. Except for wearing a phony pony one Saturday, I've always worn my natural hair out. After my friends, family, SO, and coworkers had seen it, it was a lot easier (the anticipation about what you think folks will think is worse than the reality, IMO).
 
My original plan was to grow my hair out just long enough to get a "silkener" at Curve. Thank goodness I didn't do that. When I was transitioning I had a friend with beautiful thick waist length natural hair that kept me inspired.
 
I failed the first time I tried to transition because I didn't know what I'd do with my hair once I cut off the relaxed ends. I'm glad I gave it another try. I love being natural. :yep:
 
honestly... no. i just always figured i could go back to chems if i didn't like it. and i ended up loving it so... the rest is history :yep:
 
I transitioned for 5 months and I was very concerned about how I would look with shorter hair that was a totally different texture from what I was used to seeing on myself.

However, I was soooo anxious to actually see and feel and learn about my hair in its natural state, that once I decided to transition, I had little doubt that I wouldn't go through with it.

I also didn't want to deal with two textures of hair on my head, so I knew after like 2 months that I was not going to be a "long term transitioner".
 
I'm like zz. I couldn't stand the two textures. I transitioned for about 10 months, but I was in braids almost the whole time, and I transitioned on accident b/c i didn't have the money to get a perm.

After I immediately went in twists, and kinda bounced between twists, and braids for the next year or so. I hated my head w/ short hair. when I started wearing my hair out I received far many more compliments then I ever did when it was relaxed from men and women. I still get approached about my hair, and that's kinda cool. The biest part for me is the new thickness of my hair. I can tell especially when I do straighten. My hair si full and even though my ends are uneven, they're not see through, and that was somethign I really struggled with when relaxed. There are days I think it would be easier if I was relaxed, but I wouldn't go back. Once you get in the flow with your hair, you won't want to go back.
 
I bc'd. I was going to transition but I had just had a baby and grew tired of doing my hair. I only went to the salon for trims and touchups and I got both done at the same time. I decided to stay home with my baby full time and this motivated me even more to go natural. I made an attempt at transitioning during my pregnancy but I gave in because of the extra thickness of my hair at that time. I think it is a big decision because to me it's not just about hair. People do treat you a little differently and look at you differently due to the way your hair looks. It is so crazy to me because I had long hair since I was a child and at 29 I had it cut all off to maybe a 1/2 an inch or less and despite the drastic change I actually loved it. I loved it because it was easy for me and I was shocked to see that my head was not big. I thought it was for so many years. I have alot of thick hair and all those layers of hair can make your head appear bigger than what it actually is for some people. It also did not help that I have a round face also because you look big all around in that case. I have come to grips with alot of my imperfections and realized that they were not necessarily imperfections at all. It was my thoughts about how I compared to other people and I thought I was being very silly by doing that to myself. It all boils down to your confidence level and how you see yourself; not where you measure compared to other people. This is the frame of mind that led me to successfully completing the bc and walking around with confidence despite all of the naysayers.

I would not say my confidence level was 100% but it was high enough for me to say forget what other people think and just do it. It took me a while to be comfortable with myself and I didn't realize until I bc'd how much I really did hide behind my hair and relied upon it to up my confidence level. I really had to decide was my hair really that detrimental to my overall confidence that I would feel unworthy if it were short??? This is just my take on things based on my experience alone. I used to think that hair was just hair but honestly if that were true why is it so hard for us to make the decision to just cut it all off?? It does to some extent change your life. For me it changed my life for the better because I made a decision for myself not based on what other people thought about me and I was one who people always stopped and gave hair compliments to. Now, as a natural I do get compliments here and there but nothing compared to when I was long and relaxed but it is fine with me because I don't see myself through other people's eyes anymore. Sorry so long I just wanted to share a little of my personal story as it applied to your topic :).

My fotki: http://public.fotki.com/Musiclova just in case anyone wants to take a peek...It shows relaxed pics, my bc cut and me now.
 
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I bc'd - wanted to transition for a year. lasted like 5 months lol (mind u, my normal stretch was 3-4 months anyway) This time i'm lasting at least a year.
 
I am 7 months in, no real pull to bc yet. I work at home, so my everyday hairstyle is a bun. My inspiration to go natural was seeing all the lovely natural heads on the boards and seeing my daughter's beautiful natural hair.

It will probably really hit me around the year mark.:)
 
I didn't waste any time. I just decided one day that I didn't want to be relaxed anymore and I cut it all off to a fade. I loved the freedom of it. I wasn't worried about what others thought because I'm just drastic like that with my hair anyway.
 
My first time natural I caved because I had know clue what to do with it. This time is totally different because 1. I have accepted the fact that my hair thrives better in its natutal state. 2. I am more comfortable in my own skin. 3. I have been delivered from caring what others think about it. 4. I have seen such beautiful natural heads online that I stay inspired to hang in there. 5. My husband supports me and he is the only human being whose opinion really matters to me.
 
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Wow, this is a great thread! I hope I can stick with my commitment to transition. If anything, I think I'll b.c. before I relax again.
 
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