"Natural Hair Community My A**" -NikkiiDior

[LovelyNaps26]

Her hair texture is more socially acceptable. I am 4b , I get compliments when my hair is done to suit me... However I do realize that her hair texture is more socially acceptable... Why do we ignore this?

The more people see 4b hair out and about.. I am pretty sure that what I mentioned previously will change. However , this is the case at the moment.

The reaction she got at the expo is similar to reactions 4bers/4cers get on the daily at work, during nightlife actitivities.. Etc with a few exceptions.

Let's not walk in a cloud.

However, the working goal of forums and expos as is to be welcoming. We are getting their slowly ..and I hope that things can change for the better for all of us.

This! Those settings especially ought to be welcoming. at a natural hair expo i just don't get why she would be treated that way. What if the founder of Kinky Curly had walked in and they didn't recognize her.

I understand the socially acceptable stuff too. I get compliments on my hair now that it's longer and easier for me to wear styles that are pinned up or that hang. I remember wearing my hair in a fro once when i was newly natural and it was like i was invisible even with all that hair...in a setting where people knew me this was in 2005 so a bit earlier in the natural hair resurgence. See outside the natural hair comm is one thing but at an expo

 

[Janet']

The AA community has never been homogeneous...but this is a sad commentary on just how far we haven't gotten...

 

[fiyahwerks]

She needs a hug... One of those tight grandma ones that makes you know things will be okay.

What she encountered was: Jealous is, is what jealous does... I hope she can ignore the tom foolery she ran into and keep doing her thing.

 

[pre_medicalrulz]

She was really hurt. I feel so bad for her.
I see this all the time. I even see it with natural versus relaxed heads. It's a shame. I'm relaxed and yet I follow all natural haired women techniques (i.e, trimming in sections, etc). It's the world we live in. Once you're strong enough to understand that, it becomes easier to laugh if off and keep it moving. *shrugs* Maybe it's just me but I have the tendency to laugh off everything and anything ignorant.

 

[keepithealthy]

The AA community has never been homogeneous...but this is a sad commentary on just how far we haven't gotten...

^^^^THIS!!!!!^^^^...........

 

[Lila25]

I feel bad for her, it really hurts when your own people ostrasize you for being too dark, too light, tight curls or loose curls. As a race of people, we cannot control the way other races view us, but we can control the way we view each other..how can we ask others to respect us as a people and we have no respect for each other?

Why cry racism when we practice colorism in our own community? We have to stop this nonsense for real!

 

[Judwill07]

From watching the video, people that she encountered seem bitter and think that since her hair texture is looser she doesn't have a right to be apart of the natural hair movement.

 

[longfroinghair]

I hate to be insensitive, b/c her feelings were clearly hurt...but....
How does she know their unfriendliness means they don't see her as natural? She said They stared, whispered, and ignored her. She had to chase a woman down for a pamphlet......

Maybe their jealous of her pretty face or light skin. It could be they feared she would not fit in; they had no information for her because she is a loosely textured girl, so they handled it unprofessionally. That would just be really bad customer service skills. Who really knows what the problem was?

Could she maybe give them the benefit of the doubt and make conversation to get an idea of what's going on, cause much of the video was speculation

But if she was right, I wish she wouldn't take it personally. That expo was just run poorly by unprofessional people.

 

[reeko43]

Maybe their jealous of her pretty face or light skin. It could be they feared she would not fit in; they had no information for her because she is a loosely textured girl, so they handled it unprofessionally. That would just be really bad customer service skills. Who really knows what the problem was?

Could she maybe give them the benefit of the doubt and make conversation to get an idea of what's going on, cause much of the video was speculation

I understand trying to give the benefit of the doubt but none of the above reasons are acceptable. When advertising the affair they should have then specified "This event is not geared toward pretty, lightskinned or loose textured women". If They felt she would not fit in or had no info for her, they should not have taken her money.

 

[longfroinghair]

I understand trying to give the benefit of the doubt but none of the above reasons are acceptable. When advertising the affair they should have then specified "This event is not geared toward pretty, lightskinned or loose textured women". If They felt she would not fit in or had no info for her, they should not have taken her money.

I agree they were wrong no matter what their reason was. But:
1) This is just one event, not a reflection of the natural hair community
2) You're not sure why they were rude to you...looser hair/light skin/unfriendly

So how would this prove your loosely textured hair cannot gain you acceptance in the general natural hair community based on one event where you're not sure what the reason was?

She says:
"There is a bias about natural hair....I have problems with my natural hair too, and my journey.....They treat me as if I'm not one of them....I'm over this, I'm just over it...Black women treat me as if I'm not one of them" And then title the video Natural Hair Community My ***... erplexed

She sounded ready to give up on the natural hair community because of the bad apples

I think hair forums, (like Lhcf and naturallycurly), just to name a couple very much acknowledge looser textures and the problems they face. I don't think the general natural hair community will shun her just b/c of her looser texture.

Instead, make a video about a bad experience. Cause there is lots of positive support from black naturals for those with a looser texture. The other ignorant ones, I believe are in the minority. And if they shun you, know that the general natural hair community will have your back.

 

[kandiekj100]

I think this was the last straw for her. In the video she says that she has exeperienced all her life and one would think she'd be used to by now, but it still hurts (paraphrasing). But that was the "real world" and certainly she wouldn't be put through this same mess at a natural hair expo. Surely she'd have some reprieve there. But alas, she is met with the same ol same ol. I can understand her being upset.

 

[Embyra]

Reminds me of taren916 when she done a similar vid......

 

[wavezncurlz]

IMHO, it shouldn't have mattered what texture her hair is - she deserved to be treated with respect. She could have walked up in there with bone straight hair looking to transition, she could have been a white woman with a biracial child looking for information, she could have a child with 4b hair, or she could have just been looking to be accepted as part of the natural community. Bottom line, bad customer service and rudeness is uncalled for and in the end, the organizers and their vendors lost a potential customer.

 

[jwhitley6]

I feel bad for her...she seems genuinely hurt. However, I will say this....I believe the natural hair movement was started for and by people with kinkier textured hair. As far back as I can remember, people with "good hair" have BEEN sporting the natural look while people with "nappy" hair were getting perms and jheri curls. We didn't see many kinky textures displayed with pride after 1975.

I think the natural hair revolution evolved to include blacks who choose not to wear there hair in it's kinky state but are chemical free. I'm wondering how we will feel when people of all racial groups who are chemical free want to be included in the natural hair community. True, it's all natural hair but the journey is different...the level of acceptance (self and otherwise) is different.

But anyway, I feel bad that NikkiiDior was treated badly and felt disrespected. We can't let our personal hang-ups cause us to be rude to people...not cool.

 

[princessnad]

Hmmm… I don't know.

 

[cheryl26]

I don't have any past experiences with hair issues in regards to black ppl praising or condemning mine but she seems rather old to be complaining about something she says she's encountered life-long, especially going to a natural hair show...I always assumed all the hype and uplift were geared towards women with 4 type hair.

 

[LittleLuxe]

It's so stupid. All these ridiculous reasons to keep us divided. I wonder what would happen if we all came together.

We would still be getting things done as a people instead of being stalled in a cycle of growth and decline.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

I do accept all people as part of the natural movement/group whether or not you have 3a curls or 4bcdefg curls.

BUTTTTTT,

are we really going to pretend that its not easier to care for hair that is looser? That you may not deal with as many knots and terrible tangles?

That blowdrying is a bit easier when your pattern is looser? That your hair tends to grow a bit faster because a)the oil doesnt have a problem traveling up the hair shaft like it does with 4b hair (as much trouble I mean) b) less tangling/knotting up?

My thing is its OKAY to admit this. It's just truth (most of the time, not all of the time). You should see my girlfriends hair that is 3b/4a (they are Nigerian girls). Wow. lol

We understand they have struggles too. I'm not saying that they don't, but PLEASE let's not try to pretend some things aren't easier for them as a result of their texture.

Most times this is assumed. How do we know caring for their hair is easier?

 

[Klearli]

Most times this is assumed. How do we know caring for their hair is easier?

I feel like...just because it might be 'easier' doesn't make it "easy". Its kinda like shunning someone because they caught and treated their cancer at an earlier stage than someone else. They one might have endured less pain than the other, but it is still pain none the less.

People need to chill.

Sent from my T-Mobile G2 using T-Mobile G2

 

[reeko43]

I think the natural hair revolution evolved to include blacks who choose not to wear there hair in it's kinky state but are chemical free. I'm wondering how we will feel when people of all racial groups who are chemical free want to be included in the natural hair community. True, it's all natural hair but the journey is different...the level of acceptance (self and otherwise) is different.

I would think that the natural hair revolution would include anyone who wanted to learn more about the care and appreciation for natural hair. The problem is not just with people with kinky hair learning to love their hair in its natural state. The problem is with a society that needs to evolve toward a more positive and broader view of what is beautiful and acceptable. This includes AA men and women of all hair types, other races who are caring for/in a relationship with a person with a kinkier hair texture and anyone else who is supportive and want to learn more. The Civil Rights Movement included all who supported the movement, why can't the natural hair community?

As ar as natural hair journeys levels of acceptance, I don't think anyone is in a position to generalize what people go through. Not all 4a/b people had problems with acceptance of their hair. Some of the people with "good" hair may have had hair acceptance issues depending on kind of hair the majority of people had in that person's life. I have majority 3C hair but it might as well have been 5g in a family of people whose average hair types ranged from 2a - 3b. A person raised by a white family in a white neighborhood who had hair like the person in the video may be made to feel inferior. Until we walk in someone else's shoes, we will never truly know what another person may or may not experience.

 

[Chameleonchick]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhG9shdCNxs&feature=feedu

 

[Chameleonchick]

But who is apolonia or apallonia I don't know?? Maybe this is before my time.

 

[qchelle]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhG9shdCNxs&feature=feedu

OMGGGGG!!!!! I'm at 3:41 and omg!!!!!!!!!!!!

ETA: wooooooooooooooo!!! She is CRAZYYY!!!

 

[reeko43]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhG9shdCNxs&feature=feedu

Ok, that was ignorant.

 

[LadyRaider]

Okay... let's unpack this. What ARE the problems of "looser textures?"

I am not 4b. I don't believe in hair typing because it is meaningless and it separates us; but I'm just adding that information to support my question. What is it that "looser textures" have so bad?

 

[Klearli]

And ill say it. My sister with very fine 3b hair, and light skin (but not light enough to be teased) was praised her whole life for her hair. When my sister wears a puff, its cute. If I dare wear my hair in a natural state around certain family members, I will get snide comments, and around my grandmother? (When are you getting a perm? Why are you wearing your hair nappy now?) Whoa. My father having a rule in his house that we can't wear wigs (no woman should have one hair in the day and a different one at night, *** a protective style). But... No one would call my sisters hair nappy. She doesn't know what an ssk is.

BUT, on the same time, my sister wants a sew in, but her hair would probably come out from the weight of the tracks. Her hair has never grown past shoulder length probably because for her whole life she wore puffs, or whatever curly style there was. While me and my other 4a sister have had hair mbl, and my other sis has had waist length hair. When 3b sis figured out her hair could be straight, she kind of ruined her curls with heat damage, and her stylist is constantly chopping her "split ends".

But still, she can throw her hair in a neat pony tail while its in its natural state in about hmm, one second. My relaxed sister can throw her hair in a neat pony tail in about 2 secs, lol. I'm not going to say how long it takes me to put my 4a hair in a pony (if I even have enough hair for a pony since I bc'd.)

*shrug*

Sent from my T-Mobile G2 using T-Mobile G2

 

[Chameleonchick]

Ok, that was ignorant.

I know what you mean, a lot of her videos are off the chain........but if you look past all of that she has some valid points. At least with what I have experienced on my own. At the same time I can see where Nikki is coming from too.

 

[LadyRaider]

Here is the type of hair that is rampant in my family. My mother's hair was probably a looser, silkier curl than this. I think my mom had a pretty "easy" time with her hair. She never had to pay for relaxers, that is for sure.

The ladies in my family with looser texture would probably just say, "Lucky me" and move on.

I always wanted hair like my mother's. But I like mine too. Everybody has something. Math comes easy for some people as well. Does that mean they should be whining to a math tutor?

I don't know. I just don't see why people aren't happy with what they have. Shouldn't you be thankful for blessings? No one should have been mean to her. But in the end no one really knows what they were thinking; we are just getting an interpretation based on the chip on her shoulder.

 

[Bluetopia]

oh... uhm... no comment

o m g. that was my immediate reaction too.

 

[song_of_serenity]

I can't believe her own experiences are being debated and made less than. If she was a 4b sista saying the same thing, a LOT more sympathy would be garnered. YES, I know the plight of the darkerskinned vs lighterskinned and treatment etc but for Pete's sake, stop acting like a person's life is carefree. :/