My stylist is on point or crazy?

[divachyk]

I'mma newbie that use to relax every 6 weeks. I am trying to stretch and am currently 9 weeks post and have some hair concerns. My hair from root to a few inches from the tip is super soft (almost too soft) and fragile feeling...easily snapped when manipulating. The ends, however, are brittle and dry and not retaining moisture but feels a little stronger than the rest of the hair. It's like I have two different textures going on but that's not by design.

I am experiencing some breakage and although it's minimal in number, it's a little more than what I'm use too. I'm losing about 5 strands per day to breakage and about 5 strands to shedding and that's with little to no manipulation. I'm losing that just by trying to pull my hair up into a bun. If I finger comb or comb with an actual comb, that number increases.

The nature of my concern is that my hair just feels fragile overall and strands are seeming to break a little easier than normal. I phoned my stylist to discuss and she says that my hair is acting differently because I'm overdue for my relaxer. My appointment for a relaxer is tomorrow....she assures me she will assess my hair and determine the path forward before relaxing but I'm 200% sure she'll say relax because that's what she focused on -- me being overdue for my relaxer.

What should I do?

 

[NIN4eva]

Yeah, I wouldn't go to her. She makes no sense. Did she go any deeper into her theory?

 

[dachsies_rule!]

Stretching your relaxer has nothing to do with the rest of your hair's texture...she just wants to make more money by having you come more often. Your hair feeling super soft may mean you have too much moisture and not enough protein. The tips being dry, brittle and not retaining moisture sounds like your porosity is off. What is your regi?

 

[Minty]

Your stylist IS RIGHT (partially), your hair IS acting differently.....now its up to YOU to play inspector and figure out what it needs at this point. If you are interested in stretching your relaxer you may want to head over to the transitioners without BC thread for tips on how to extend your time between relaxers.

There are some ladies who do not stretch as the breakage is a bit much between their bone straight hair and their very dense 4b/c/z natural texture.

For more successful stretching,

*I needed to clarify my hair,
*use something to even out my porosity every now and then,
*use a pH balanced moisturizing shampoo to keep down on tangles,
*use a light protein/moisture balanced DC on my bone straight relaxed hair
*use moisture cream leave in focusing on my roots
*comb hair only after 50%-75% dry
*Redken Anti-Snap.

 

[dachsies_rule!]

@ HijabiFlygirl: what brand of DC do you use for a protein/moisture balance?

 

[lea86111]

well i think, just MHO, that maybe you need to do a protein treatment and that might take care of the overly soft hair...dunno how soft it is exactly so you'll have to decide if it's gonna be a light protein treatment or a hard one (like aphogee 2 step) then follow wit moisture for balance maybe. Then check how your ends feel and if they are still dry n breaking i think then you should trim. You havent stretched for long but the longer you stretch, the more you have to up your dc game up.
but i am not sure, just throwing ideas around. HTH

 

[supermodelsonya]

I think it's time for a protein treatment. Protein is what locks the moisture in your hair as well.

 

[divachyk]

Yeah, I wouldn't go to her. She makes no sense. Did she go any deeper into her theory?

The short and sweet version is that my hair is use to relaxing at 6 weeks and it's acting differently since I'm off schedule. I told her my ng is manageable and healthy and I don't understand how stretching negatively impacted the rest of my hair....she then flipped it on me and said it's probably my diet or some other internal factors causing issues. WHAT.

Stretching your relaxer has nothing to do with the rest of your hair's texture...she just wants to make more money by having you come more often. Your hair feeling super soft may mean you have too much moisture and not enough protein. The tips being dry, brittle and not retaining moisture sounds like your porosity is off. What is your regi?

Agree wholeheartedly. Wkly Regi....(kinda still developing/tweaking)
Overnight prepoo with whole baggy: evoo, castor. Next day I add honey and evco to damp hair from overnight baggy'n; heat cap for ~30min.
Poo: HE LTR (not sure I like this) or Joico Moisture Recovery
Protein: Aphogee 2min
Rinse Condish: Aussie Moist or Joico Moisture Recovery
DC: Lustrasilk Mango/Shea Butter, evoo -- with heat
Leave In: NTM silk touch, Fantasia Anti-Frizz Serum
Seal: 50/50 of jbco/evoo
Air dry with scarf method
I moisturize/seal daily with my NTM and jbco/evoo mix

The past wash I deviated from the above and noticed my hair responded differently. I omitted honey (because I was pressed for time), aphogee (because I thought my hair was feeling too coarse), fantasia anti-frizz (because someone said it has too many cones). I air dried with Elasta QP H-Two, NTM silk touch and didn't seal with oil....just applied leave-ins and threw on scarf. Maybe not sealing, omitting the steps mentioned, and/or using Elasta caused some issues. I bun most days but I do live in a humid state.

For more successful stretching,
*I needed to clarify my hair,
*use something to even out my porosity every now and then,
*use a light protein/moisture balanced DC on my bone straight relaxed hair

clarify - -- never clarified, am kinda scared as I hear it's harsh, but do think I need to clarify as I've tested out several suggested prods that I've read about and my hair prob has a bunch of buildup. My hair does feel coated.

porosity -- again intimidated about doing this as I've never done this in the past. Think Roux is a highly recommended brand correct? I visited Sally's the other day with the intent to buy wasn't sure which Roux porosity to buy.

protein -- been using aphogee 2min reconstructor weekly. prior to joining LHCF a month or so ago, I rarely used aphogee. I started using the 2min weekly based on suggestion. i mention in a thread that i was confused and didn't quite know what my hair needed, someone suggested balancing it out with a light protein followed by DC each time i poo until i figure out my needs and so i did until my hair starting feeling coarse and coated. i decided to drop aphogee this last poo session and big difference it made...my hair was super soft, almost too soft that it felt fragile and was snapping easily. that's confusing. one extreme to another.

@ HijabiFlygirl: what brand of DC do you use for a protein/moisture balance?

Lustrasilk mango/shea butter with evoo. I'm almost out of it so I might try something different. I heard good things about Motions. What's your preference?

 

[hopeful]

Her flipping on you and talking about your diet tells me she is in defense mode and if your hair continues to break it is NOT her fault. Sounds like you may be outgrowing her because of newfound knowledge. You may need to find a new stylist.

 

[divachyk]

well i think, just MHO, that maybe you need to do a protein treatment and that might take care of the overly soft hair...dunno how soft it is exactly so you'll have to decide if it's gonna be a light protein treatment or a hard one (like aphogee 2 step) then follow wit moisture for balance maybe. Then check how your ends feel and if they are still dry n breaking i think then you should trim. You havent stretched for long but the longer you stretch, the more you have to up your dc game up.
but i am not sure, just throwing ideas around. HTH

Thx, I agree -- protein treatment, assess situation and go forth with plan of action. The softness was like how it feels when you just received a bone straight relaxer. Laying flat to your head and super, duper, uper baby soft. I'm a little heavy handed and flat out ruff at times so I need to find middle ground where the hair isn't too soft nor too hard.

Her flipping on you and talking about your diet tells me she is in defense mode and if your hair continues to break it is NOT her fault. Sounds like you may be outgrowing her because of newfound knowledge. You may need to find a new stylist.

Newfound knowledge is right. She was nice about it but did flip the script quick, fast & in a hurry. I probably sparked it b/c I told her I feel like something is missing from my salon hair care b/c I'm accustomed to receiving protein treatments and DC at my last salon (I've only been to this new salon for about a year). She told me she's never done either on my hair. She now suggests Dudley's DRC. I gotta look that up. I understand I only go to her for relaxers but I am alarmed that she has not done either without me first questioning it. She did say she's done a Design 6 n 1 reconstructor. I questioned protein/DC early on when I first started going to her but she said Design Essentials prods work different than what I'm use too...they don't take as long to penetrate, don't require heat, etc.

 

[ChocalateDiva]

Dudleys DCR is the ish!! If your hair is not used to stretching then I can understand why its acting differently. I disagree with whomever said that stretching doesnt affect the rest of your hair........it affects mine..ie, frizzness, not retaining moisture, etc...

Dont stone me ppl!!!!!!!!!!! but............it may be time for you to do a hard protien treatment and relaxer your hair......

If you have already stretched 3 weeks longer than usual-thats good!! You can always add a week or to to every stretch. Next time try to make to 10 or 11 weeks before you consider relaxing..

Slow and steady wins the race (most of the time hehe).

Best of luck to you with your decision.

 

[Chevelure618]

My advice:

I think you are using too many products that are leaning toward moisture.

Your hair that is too soft needs a harder protein. The ends need moisture or a light dusting.

1-Clarify first.
2-Try Nexus Emergencee
3-After the Nexuss, use a light moisturizing conditioner just to soften the protein treatment. (VO5 is fine)
4-Apply a good and heavy moisturizer (I swear by Ultra Black Hair Lotion Creme Moisturizer) to the ends only.
5-Can you use magnetic rollers on the ends being careful to keep the ends smooth and sit under the dryer? The roller set doesn't have to be perfect, just so that your ends dry smooth with the moisturizer in.
6-After Roller are out, seal with a LIGHT oil....sweet almond is good

I hope this works for you. Remember to KISS

 

[divachyk]

My advice:

I think you are using too many products that are leaning toward moisture.

Your hair that is too soft needs a harder protein. The ends need moisture or a light dusting.

1-Clarify first.
2-Try Nexus Emergencee
3-After the Nexuss, use a light moisturizing conditioner just to soften the protein treatment. (VO5 is fine)
4-Apply a good and heavy moisturizer (I swear by Ultra Black Hair Lotion Creme Moisturizer) to the ends only.
5-Can you use magnetic rollers on the ends being careful to keep the ends smooth and sit under the dryer? The roller set doesn't have to be perfect, just so that your ends dry smooth with the moisturizer in.
6-After Roller are out, seal with a LIGHT oil....sweet almond is good

I hope this works for you. Remember to KISS

-How is Nexus different from Aphogee 2min?
-Do you wash Nexus out then apply VO5?
-Why not apply the Ultra Black all over (is this because I've stated my ends are the only dry part of my head?)
-Use to roller set but too far too long so I started air drying but my hair is definitely not as silky and smooth as roller setting.

Dudleys DCR is the ish!! If your hair is not used to stretching then I can understand why its acting differently.

Do you use Dudley's on your hair or do you allow stylist to apply?

 

[naturalgyrl5199]

Is she relaxing new growth only or from the root to the tip? Double processing already permmed hair can weaken the strands at the tip and cause breakage...no matter how long or short you stretch....I used to stretch my relaxers 8 weeks but when I started doing NG only I noticed an improvement in my hair's health....That was years ago, and relaxing NG only is pretty much common knowledge now but...you never know...just knocking down every door.

 

[Hypnotic_LT]

Sounds like a protein thing like the woman have sid. Get some protein like ApHogee and then go from there....

 

[divachyk]

Is she relaxing new growth only or from the root to the tip?

ng only which is why i don't understand how not relaxing exactly at 6 weeks and stretching to 9 weeks impacts the length of my hair.

Sounds like a protein thing like the woman have sid. Get some protein like ApHogee and then go from there....

do you all find that your hair feels a bit coarse after a protein treatment or am i not using the right DC to soften up the hair thereafter?

 

[Minty]

@ HijabiFlygirl: what brand of DC do you use for a protein/moisture balance?

Whoa chile.

Seriously it depends, and I'm still searching - looking for the perfect beat.

By price point:

**Miss Key 10 n 1
**Silicon Mix (I like this better on dry hair)
**Elasta QP Intense
**Nunaat Silicone
**Loreal Therapy Mega Moisture Creme -
**Tressame Anti-Breakage Conditioner - as a rinse
**Kona Mango Conditioner (excellent as a rinse, softener after Henna, or when there is a protein mishap)
**Burt's Bees Avocado Pre-treatment - stars (on dry hair)

**Biolage Fortetherapie
**Joico K-Pak - used as a rinse (left on no more than 2 min)
**Label.M Intensive
**Roland Una Reconstructor (green container) - This one gets stars from me.
**Kerastase Ciment (will not use anti-snap if this is used)
**Sebastian Light I like this one - especially if I've DC or Hot oil treated on dry hair - and use this as a DC after I've shampooed.

**Thermafuse Volume Conditioner -This is a PROTEIN conditioner, pay no attention to the label "volume" it is a wheat/ceramide based conditioner. It is excellent, but it is def. a tier 1 protein akin to Aphogee 2min - but better. It does require a moisture rinse and/or leave-in conditioner. This product get a thumbs up from me (you maybe able to locate a liter at Marshalls)

**Mixology: Tressame Moisture Rich Conditioner (the clear label, not the black) + Thermafuse Volume (2:1) + coconut oil + sunflower oil (oils in equal proportion
- 2c Tress.
- 1c Thermafuse Volume
- 1tbsp Coconut oil
- 2tbsp Sunflower oil
Mixed with stick mixer - use on dry hair. (This mix on dry hair, shampoo and a leave-in)


I have had great success with all of these products on my hair [relaxed/bone - medium (but fragile) 4/abc with a little bit of 3c at my nape to keep things interesting]

In general, unless the hair is loaded with product, deep conditioning dry hair when stretching can provide superior results than on wet, shampooed hair. (less opportunity to stretch hair while applying the thick DC)

HTH :blowkiss:

 

[Minty]

The only steady constant to whatever I'm doing to my hair: 2 squirts of Redken Anti-Snap

 

[Chevelure618]

divachyk-

Nexuss Emergencee can be compared NOT to Aphogee 2 minute, but to Aphogee 2 STEP. Nexuss is a hard protein RESCUE protein treatment, i.e. a HARD protein treatment (caps are not to yell, but to emphasize sorry)

You MUST wash out thoroughly any hard protein treatment and ALways moisturize after to avoid breakage from this strong protein treatment. It softens the protein although the protein is still attached to your hair for strength.


Put the leave-in moisturizer on your ends, yes, because you stated that you think your hair is too soft all over and that your ends are dry. I think right now, you need your ends moist.

Please don't take this as talking down to you but it helped me so much to read Cathy Howse's book. It is the standard Bible of black hair care, explaining in simple terms the science and common sense and step-by-step reasoning for product use.
I realize that you can gain that knowledge here, but sometimes the ladies here have SO MUCH and different techniques, and they don't all work for every different type of hair or condition that you can overdo it.

I think Tracey has the right idea to find a regi that works and KISS! I think basically you need to find your moisture/protein balance, when you do, your hair will be fine.