My S/O doesn't like the Satin Scarf

[Dayjoy]

My SO is just used to it now. Haha if I say I am going to bed he KNOWS. He's seen my hair with a scarf with a t shirt with everything and doesn't blink twice about it haha.

You just need to tell him, not like he sleeps with his eyes open...

 

[gabulldawg]

I think this whole topic is crazy. I sleep with a wrap or bonnet every night. I don't even know/care if DH had issues with it when we first started living together. He would make little comments and jokes and stuff, but that's it. We did agree long ago that I wouldn't wear it when we have sex, but there have been times when I did.

 

[danysedai]

I wear mine to bed (yesterday I had on satin rollers,a headband for my edges, a bonnet and a long satin scarf on!)

I dream of the pajama set Sanaa Lathan had in a movie (the one she falls in love with a white guy). The pajama set was silk and the scarf matched the pajama, she looked adorable.

 

[D.Lisha]

My husband and I began dating before I started by hair journey, so of course I used to wear absolutely NOTHING on my head.
But shortly after I began growing my hair out, I naturally developed of habit of protecting my hair with satin scarves at night. At first DH would look at me funny as if to say "So..you're really gonna go to bed like that tho..?" and shortly afterwards I showed him my growth progress/length check pictures to help explain my point and from then on he fell in line

To this very day he doesn't let me go to bed without M&S(ing) AND Covering my head with a satin scarf

Sometimes you have to break it down for these men to understand.....it may take a while..but eventually they'll come around

 

[MsEveMarie]

You haven't said if this is a Black man; however, I'd think any Black man that has been raised by a Black woman or has been serious enough with a Black woman to have her sleeping over at his home regularly has seen women wear scarves to bed. It's not that serious to say your beauty is somehow diminished because you prepared your hair and slept in a scarf.

I sleep in a scarf every night and have at least 15 scarves/bonnets. If DH notices my scarf come off in the night, he will nudge me to fix it. DH sometimes sleeps in a loc soc (a recent addition) since his hair is so long that it could strangle me or him if not tied up.

His comment about being worried seems odd. Did he think you were taking out clip in weave?

Unrelated but it makes me wonder if he's one of those men who freaks out if you remove your makeup and look the slightest bit different without makeup. I've heard of women who won't remove their makeup around their guy. Sleeping in makeup is damaging to the skin but I guess some women do what they feel they need to do.

My bf is white and hasn't mumbled a word/blinked twice about what I sleep with on my head. I say what I sleep with b/c if I'm staying over his place sometimes I forget my head scarf and we'll improvise with a tshirt/ or regular light weight neck scarf. He knows if my head is touching the pillow its getting tied up on a regular, even during intimate moments.

 

[bellebebe]

Mine hates it! Lol

 

[HomesteaderDreams]

This thread reminds me of this scene from "A Different World"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4hdpQdljKk&feature=youtube_gdata_player

yah yah. i thought of that, too. lol

 

[LdyKamz]

I forgot about this thread. lol I may have mentioned in this thread before that he bought me some scarves before and he asked me why I didn't wear those. He explained to me that he didn't like the plain black one. He prefers the colorful ones, flowers, designs, something. The plain black doesn't do it for him. Haha So there you have it. And I will respect that and compromise. He doesn't make jokes when I wear my scarves, as long as I wear a "pretty" one.

 

[Nazaneen]

My bf is white and hasn't mumbled a word/blinked twice about what I sleep with on my head. I say what I sleep with b/c if I'm staying over his place sometimes I forget my head scarf and we'll improvise with a tshirt/ or regular light weight neck scarf. He knows if my head is touching the pillow its getting tied up on a regular, even during intimate moments.

intimate moments though? he needs to get a silk pillowcase

.... said the Phablet

 

[divachyk]

I've never had this issue with dh. He grew up with a mom & sisters that scarfed at night so it was never issue with us. He understands the reasons behind it and respect it fully. In the event I was in a different situation, I'd explain the reasons for it and look for some cute scarves. They have all sorts of stylish ones at dept stores.

 

[BraunSugar]

It shouldn't matter if he is Black or not. I have been in serious relationships with Black and White men and none of them had an issue with the scarf or bonnet. If something like that is a deal breaker, then I need to reevaluate who I am with.

 

[havilland]

LMAO
You're gonna have to choose. Its either your hair or your boo! LOL

I keep the satin scarf tucked under my pillow. As soon as DH falls asleep I put that bad boy on.

^^^^this is what i did for years. I would bring a satin pillow case and tie my hair up in the middle of the night.

My former boyfriend, now husband could care less now. He enjoys my hair too much to let me jeopardize it. He understands healthy hair care after ME teaching him about it over the years. I even let him pick out my scarves now. LOL

 

[Black Ambrosia]

I saw this pic online and instantly thought of this thread.

 

[Desert Skye]

When I was dating my now husband (Chinese) I told him from the get go I wrap my hair at night and sleep in bonnets. Didnt blink an eye cuz. Though none of the females in his family wrapped thier hair, they sure went to bed with all sort of other stuff on their faces. And you all know how Asians are when it comes to skin.

 

[nlamr2013]

I never git thay yall are going to be sleep. Whats it fing matter? I can see not wanting a scarf duing relations because that detracts from the experience lol but not while sleeping. All that staying up until he sleeps no thank you lol and do you have to wake up before him to take it off?
I breathe heavily and sometimes condensation escapes my mouth a bonnet is the least of dudes worries.

 

[Britt]

I saw this pic online and instantly thought of this thread.

Lollll !

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF

 

[PinkSunshine77]

I'd tell him oh well! Would you rather me be bald?

 

[Fine 4s]

No worries here, never even thought about it. I wear cotton (bad Fine 4s) scarfs when I rock the earthy crunchy look so it's no wearing a silk/sating scarf to bed.

I will suggest your scarves smell fresh and not funky!
....have them in rotation...

 

[abcd09]

My white SO is trained lol. At first I'm sure it was a little weird and I tried to accommodate. Then he saw me stressing in the morning and I told him my bonnet is a must and he learned. I bought a satin pillow case and he will find my pillow for me and will make sure I'm sleeping on it. He got so used to the bonnet that he doesn't even care during coloring. I will take it off right before and he will say "no you can leave it on". Is that weird?

 

[Nazaneen]

My white SO is trained lol. At first I'm sure it was a little weird and I tried to accommodate. Then he saw me stressing in the morning and I told him my bonnet is a must and he learned. I bought a satin pillow case and he will find my pillow for me and will make sure I'm sleeping on it. He got so used to the bonnet that he doesn't even care during coloring. I will take it off right before and he will say "no you can leave it on". Is that weird?

aaaaw. he loves you

.... said the Phablet

 

[Tatilove]

This thread is very entertaining lol

I didn't grow up tying up my hair, but I am thinking of doing that now. But I'm not sure if I would be willing to wear one while being intimate. Not just for the man's sake, I just wouldn't feel sexy. For sleeping though, I wouldn't have a problem wearing it. But for a man who isn't used to seeing women sleep with a scarf, before judging him and say he is a jerk, I would first explain to him WHY I wear it (without sarcasm). And if a man can't handle seeing you with a scarf, how is he going to handle seeing you when you're sick and look a complete mess?

 

[coolsista-paris]

my hubby at first was like " ohh my little sweet granny" . i told him "yeah im protectîng my hair ! you better get used to it, i bet you will love playing in it when its gets longer"
he once for my birthday bought: jewelry, lots of shea butter that i like, and a cute coloured satin bonnet to sleep + a soft bonnet to dry hair after shampoo. nice gift! i do plan on buying a satin pillowase. i wanted to buy silk for my bed sheets too.
oh and hubby doesnt mind coloring with it on my head.... it comes off by itself, if you see what i mean lol

 

[MissTripleChoc]

My SO is white and at first he was curious as to why I was tying my hair at night so I just had to explain to him that my hair will matt and knot if it's left uncovered. Now he doesn't even bat an eyelid when I have it on. It's either my headscarf and flowing healthy locks or no headscarf and short broken off hair!

 

[lamaria211]

My DH is black with 3 sisters, he reminds me if I look like im about to forget to tie my hair down. And my hair is tied down during"grown up time" as well. He dont be looking at my head! Lol

 

[yuhlovevybz]

I'm single but I hate tying my hair anyways, I don't think it's cute (on me) so I sleep on my hair. I have satin sheets and pillow cases so I don't find it an issue. If I oil it and brush with boar hair brush before bed it looks decent in the morning and just needs a good brushing. Of course these days I won't straighten it at all so I just release the kraken at night and wash in the morning.

 

[Pennefeather]

I love this thread! My husband isn't black, he was used to seeing his mother in rollers and a scarf growing up. No scarf though when it is grownup time.

 

[lookingforkeona]

I def couldn't do it with a scarf on.

 

[Pinkicey]

My man sees me in scarf or bonnet at any time I need to have it on.

 

[coolsista-paris]

mine doesnt mind either. if its grown up time i know i will end up without it at the end....... lol