Ediese
New Member
Sorry for the long read, but I thought this topic was quite entertaining and wanted to share.
I suppose I’ve been in Category 2 a few times in my life without even knowing. I remember breaking up with an ex back in 2008 after we’d been together going on 2 years. He started dated someone within 6 months. They got engaged within a year, and they just got married in April of this year. lol Imagine my surprise! To me, our relationship was great. It took me 2 years to realize that we weren’t really progressing though. I’d ask him where he thought our relationship was heading, or if he could see himself marrying me, and he could never quite answer. Damn Category 2!
I think we may have discussed this ad nauseum in the past, but I had this discussion with my SO the other day and wanted to share. I found it so interesting how he broke it down for me. By the way, try doing a quick search on Google for “Women in Categories or Women and the Ladder System”, and you’ll see that most men do this. It’s partly why they’ll stay with a woman for years, but never marry her. Somehow though, as soon as they’ve broken up they have somehow already met someone and gotten married. I’ve seen it happen many times, to me and to even some on this board. Go Figure!!!
Anyway, here’s a summary of how our conversation went, as best as I can remember. I don’t exactly remember how we came about the conversation, but it had something to do with him telling me that he always knew that I’d be the one that he’d marry.
Then he said something about me being in his Category 1. I was like, ‘huh? What the heck is that?’
Him: You know men put women in categories when they first meet them. I have 2 categories.
Here’s his breakdown. I asked him to write this quick mockup for this for this thread, and this is what he sent me. He was writing a chapter lol, but I told him to keep it extremely short. (Remember this is only his list!)
Males place females into categories, whether consciously or subconsciously. This narrative focuses on (2) categories that most women I date fall into, Category 1 and Category 2. On the surface, women that fall into these categories are treated similarly, but the differences run far and deep.
FYI…he seems to believe that women will never understand these concepts.
Keep in mind that men are so different, so this may not apply to some of them. Personally, I think most of them have their own way of categorizing us. I wish they’d be more honest, so we wouldn’t waste our time. Sometimes though, I think we know that we’re being strung along, but we just can’t seem to leave. I know I’ve been there. Why leave a relationship that’s going good in every other way? [This only applies to women that are actually interested in getting married. Yes, I get that a lot of women on LHCF aren’t interested in marriage.]
Let’s also be honest, women categorize men too within seconds of meeting them. For a variety of reasons, a lot of us get caught up and stuck for years in their other categories.
What do you guys think about this? Which category do you think you currently fall into?
I suppose I’ve been in Category 2 a few times in my life without even knowing. I remember breaking up with an ex back in 2008 after we’d been together going on 2 years. He started dated someone within 6 months. They got engaged within a year, and they just got married in April of this year. lol Imagine my surprise! To me, our relationship was great. It took me 2 years to realize that we weren’t really progressing though. I’d ask him where he thought our relationship was heading, or if he could see himself marrying me, and he could never quite answer. Damn Category 2!
I think we may have discussed this ad nauseum in the past, but I had this discussion with my SO the other day and wanted to share. I found it so interesting how he broke it down for me. By the way, try doing a quick search on Google for “Women in Categories or Women and the Ladder System”, and you’ll see that most men do this. It’s partly why they’ll stay with a woman for years, but never marry her. Somehow though, as soon as they’ve broken up they have somehow already met someone and gotten married. I’ve seen it happen many times, to me and to even some on this board. Go Figure!!!
Anyway, here’s a summary of how our conversation went, as best as I can remember. I don’t exactly remember how we came about the conversation, but it had something to do with him telling me that he always knew that I’d be the one that he’d marry.
Then he said something about me being in his Category 1. I was like, ‘huh? What the heck is that?’Him: You know men put women in categories when they first meet them. I have 2 categories.
Here’s his breakdown. I asked him to write this quick mockup for this for this thread, and this is what he sent me. He was writing a chapter lol, but I told him to keep it extremely short. (Remember this is only his list!)
Males place females into categories, whether consciously or subconsciously. This narrative focuses on (2) categories that most women I date fall into, Category 1 and Category 2. On the surface, women that fall into these categories are treated similarly, but the differences run far and deep.
FYI…he seems to believe that women will never understand these concepts.
Keep in mind that men are so different, so this may not apply to some of them. Personally, I think most of them have their own way of categorizing us. I wish they’d be more honest, so we wouldn’t waste our time. Sometimes though, I think we know that we’re being strung along, but we just can’t seem to leave. I know I’ve been there. Why leave a relationship that’s going good in every other way? [This only applies to women that are actually interested in getting married. Yes, I get that a lot of women on LHCF aren’t interested in marriage.]
Let’s also be honest, women categorize men too within seconds of meeting them. For a variety of reasons, a lot of us get caught up and stuck for years in their other categories.
What do you guys think about this? Which category do you think you currently fall into?
