As I am typing tears are falling from my face 
. After 2 1/2 years of transtioning I ran back to a relaxer. Here's the story I took my braids down and I had an apt. to get them redone but the lady who braids my hair stood me up ( I know very unprofessional) she called me two days later and told me she moved to Georgia.
So I'm left with all this thick natural hair and totally clueless on how to style it. I tried to recreate the styles of babyblue and mel , who's hair I adore so much but I couldn't do it. Everytime I would try to twist it up little balls of hair would come out. Whenever I wet it and combed it hair would come out. I tried to do a braid out with about 15 braids I would unraval them and hair would come out. I couldn't understand this because I washed, conditioned, moisturized and used a wide toothed comb also my hair was soft.
So out of an act of desperation I called my old stylist and she fit me in that same day for a virgin relaxar. When I was at the salon I felt numb, I didn't feel anything. When she called my name and proceed to put the cape on and started mixing the Affirm-no lye relaxer I felt nothing. After she was finished my head felt so light and diffrent, not in a good way. I came home and looked in the mirror and I didn't reconize my self. I wanted to cry but I couldn't it was done.
What finally broke me down was when I went to seem my mom and she burst out crying and said your hair is beautiful but this is not you and I just let it out. Had my good cry and came to the realization once again that permed hair is not for me. I would never go so far as to look down on someone who is relaxed never in a milllion years women of color are all beautiful, relaxed, natural, or texturized.
So I am going to transtion all over again and chop it off in january that would be seven months. I am going to Big chop this time so I don't use braids as a crutch not to deal with my natural texture. I know for me all of that hair I had to deal with all of a sudden at one time was too overwhelming. So gruadually I am going to embrace my texture.
On a final note the same albums inspired me before mel,babyblue, nay several others continue to inspire me today. So anyone who is in my shoes stop and think before you relax again there is a reason you trasioned in the first place. Just wanted to share my story God bless
. After 2 1/2 years of transtioning I ran back to a relaxer. Here's the story I took my braids down and I had an apt. to get them redone but the lady who braids my hair stood me up ( I know very unprofessional) she called me two days later and told me she moved to Georgia. So I'm left with all this thick natural hair and totally clueless on how to style it. I tried to recreate the styles of babyblue and mel , who's hair I adore so much but I couldn't do it. Everytime I would try to twist it up little balls of hair would come out. Whenever I wet it and combed it hair would come out. I tried to do a braid out with about 15 braids I would unraval them and hair would come out. I couldn't understand this because I washed, conditioned, moisturized and used a wide toothed comb also my hair was soft.
So out of an act of desperation I called my old stylist and she fit me in that same day for a virgin relaxar. When I was at the salon I felt numb, I didn't feel anything. When she called my name and proceed to put the cape on and started mixing the Affirm-no lye relaxer I felt nothing. After she was finished my head felt so light and diffrent, not in a good way. I came home and looked in the mirror and I didn't reconize my self. I wanted to cry but I couldn't it was done.
What finally broke me down was when I went to seem my mom and she burst out crying and said your hair is beautiful but this is not you and I just let it out. Had my good cry and came to the realization once again that permed hair is not for me. I would never go so far as to look down on someone who is relaxed never in a milllion years women of color are all beautiful, relaxed, natural, or texturized.
So I am going to transtion all over again and chop it off in january that would be seven months. I am going to Big chop this time so I don't use braids as a crutch not to deal with my natural texture. I know for me all of that hair I had to deal with all of a sudden at one time was too overwhelming. So gruadually I am going to embrace my texture.
On a final note the same albums inspired me before mel,babyblue, nay several others continue to inspire me today. So anyone who is in my shoes stop and think before you relax again there is a reason you trasioned in the first place. Just wanted to share my story God bless
you'll be okay though....7 months FLIES by, and before you know it, you'll be rockin the BAA and inspiring someone else!
sending some love your way. Thank you for sharing your story, it was very inspirational to me.
. I hope you feel better soon. -- jainygirl
