Light Skinned Guys= High Maintenance?

Not sure why y'all r acting like u don't know what op is talking about. This is the same ish guys say about LSW.

I remember back in the day LSM were the hot commodity, that has changed recently to dark skinned men.

If u are told that your light skin makes u more desirable of course you're going to act like you're the ish, youve got lots of options so why would you make it easy for someone to get with u.

Not saying it's right but its only natural fir you to act like your ish don't stink. This is no different to saying guys who r doctors and lawyers are harder to get. Their profession is attractive to a lot of women, making them stand out from the crowd. Those men r not just gonna settle for any chick from round the way unless she has a quality(ies) he sees as desirable .
 
Yes OP - you are most probably colorstruck (I say this with love). From browsing your post I dont see what it is that you like so much about him that you are willing to degrade yourself and put yourself into potentially dangerous with him apart from his light skin - maybe he sees that too and hence doesnt try to get too deep with you either.

My boyfriend is light with light eyes and in all honesty he is the least low maintenance man i have ever been with (not because of his skin tone). I say move on he is clearly not interested in anything permanent with you no matter what you do, hes probably put you in a category as a non relationship type kind of girl and there is nothing you can do to get out of that box - learn your lesson and move on!
 
asakeba said:
Not sure why y'all r acting like u don't know what op is talking about. This is the same ish guys say about LSW.

I remember back in the day LSM were the hot commodity, that has changed recently to dark skinned men.

If u are told that your light skin makes u more desirable of course you're going to act like you're the ish, youve got lots of options so why would you make it easy for someone to get with u.

Not saying it's right but its only natural fir you to act like your ish don't stink. This is no different to saying guys who r doctors and lawyers are harder to get. Their profession is attractive to a lot of women, making them stand out from the crowd. Those men r not just gonna settle for any chick from round the way unless she has a quality(ies) he sees as desirable .
Click to expand...

Thanks asakeba!

These are my thoughts exactly. Men do the same thing with LSLHW and these sentiments are pronounced in the video vixens that we see in rap videos or just the type of women they rap about i.e. "red bones..." blah blah. I really don't think my question was far fetched. Shrug...to each his own. But I do thank those ladies for their insightful contribution. I need to accept the fact his attraction to me ends with sex, and I should count myself lucky that he didn't get that from me. I would have definitely felt worse if he did succeed in getting what he wanted and he just disappeared like he's doing now b/c he didn't get some. I definitely felt compelled to exchange my sex for love...and that would have been recipe for disaster. I guess it just hurts to be genuinely interested in someone who only sees you for one thing.
 
OP, if he is acting up, no need to analyze why. get to stepping, there is no need to put work into getting a man to want u. if he dont want u from day 1, why u wanna persuade him boo?
 
virgo_chinwe said:
For instance, he picked me up to go to his place after a nite with a girls....it was creeping hours so I definitely knew better but I really wanted to see him. Anyway, so we get to his place...I can feel my anxiety mounting b/c I had definitely made suggestive comments as far as being frustrated and wanting to see him. So I tend to talk about OT when I am nervous or on edge.
Click to expand...
You went to his house during creeping hours and you wanted to talk???? Come on now, how old are you? You have been doing suggestive talk and all??? He is just not into you unless you are going to give up the tail. Why is this such a difficult thing to grasp? BTW it has nothing to do with skin color.


Bottom line is you like him and want to start something with him, he doesn't like you in that way. Aint no way a man would pick up his "dream girl" after she was hanging out with her girls, to talk. He would take his "dream girl" home, to her home, because he wanted her to be safe.
 
virgo_chinwe said:
According to him, I put too much of front. And that being with me is like "pulling teeth", but honestly, I feel like the "pulling teeth" is only applicable to the fact that he hasn't gotten the cooch. I feel like I am trying too hard to establish something substantial with him. I want to be physical with him but I don't want anything casual. I am in it to cuff...not to f... It's frustrating b/c I get excited to just be in his presence and I feel like I have to make sexual innuendos to keep him interested. We have been talking on and off for almost two years with several lulls in our communication. We don't live in the same state and our communication is not consistent. Definitely not consistent enough to share the goods...He feels because he has "known of" me for this amount of time that he is almost entitled to get it. Maybe I am just prude, but is getting to know him really that much to ask for? For instance, he picked me up to go to his place after a nite with a girls....it was creeping hours so I definitely knew better but I really wanted to see him. Anyway, so we get to his place...I can feel my anxiety mounting b/c I had definitely made suggestive comments as far as being frustrated and wanting to see him. So I tend to talk about OT when I am nervous or on edge. He had a bday card from his little sister on his vanity and I commented about how many siblings he had. From my recollection he had three...apparently he now has five (his dad....is a mess). I made the comment do you even know how many siblings I have? And he responds, we have plenty of time to know tid bit facts about each other. Yes its a tid bit fact but I mean damn can u atleast make me feel comfortable and entertain a conversation if u r trying to get some.
Click to expand...

I'm sorry OP, but I don't think he's really into you. :ohwell: A man who is really into you will want to get to know what is in between your ears (your mind, how you think), and NOT just what's between your legs. :nono:

The fact that you say that he reveals so little of himself and makes his conversation somewhat short/vague just lets me know that he's interested in only one thing and one thing only. A man who is interested in you and wants to go "further" physically, will either court you the right way to the point where you feel MORE than ready to go further with him in that way, OR...he will ask for your hand in marriage so that he can finally have "access" to ALL of you. :yep:

This guy is a waste of time IMO, and his skin tone has absolutely NOTHING to do with it. :nono2:


ThickHair said:
You went to his house during creeping hours and you wanted to talk???? Come on now, how old are you? You have been doing suggestive talk and all??? He is just not into you unless you are going to give up the tail. Why is this such a difficult thing to grasp? BTW it has nothing to do with skin color.


Bottom line is you like him and want to start something with him, he doesn't like you in that way. Aint no way a man would pick up his "dream girl" after she was hanging out with her girls, to talk. He would take his "dream girl" home, to her home, because he wanted her to be safe.
Click to expand...

I agree with this. :yep: I don't think any guy who views a woman as his "dream girl" will even have the audacity to try to take her back to HIS house (after she had a girl's night out) in order to just "talk". Puh-leeze. :rolleyes: At that hour of night, most people are thinking one of two things. Sleep/Sex. Plain and simple. :ohwell: I don't think he views you in a relationship type of way. Otherwise, he wouldn't even dare think to treat you in this manner. When a guy is viewing a woman as "relationship material", he will make sure he treats you the BEST way possible. In fact, a lot of times you'll wonder whether or not the guy has any "sexual" desire at all! :lachen: (He'll be so "cautious" about not trying to offend you or push you in that way before you are ready. He'll want you to view him as a "gentleman". :yep: )

Don't waste your time on this guy OP. He's not worth it. :ohwell: Go find a guy (no matter WHAT complexion he is) who is truly INTO you and feels like you are WORTH pursuing. I always say, anytime I feel like I have to "do" something in order to get noticed by a man, or "earn" a man's attention in some way in order for him to like me, I automatically recognize that THIS particular man is NOT for me. :nono2: REAL men who are interested in a woman instinctively know that they have to do something to get HER attention. It's not the other way around. :nono:
 
Last edited:
LOL @ people talking about LSLH women and equating it to men. Long are the days that LS men have that advantage. Sure some women have a preference for LS but so many have a preference for DS that I can say that LSM are not in any higher demand than DS men, maybe less.

Maybe this guy can sense that you are so into him that you have lost all dignity and he is taking advantage of that. He can take advantage of any girl that is "into" any of his physical features to the point of ignoring all intelligence.
 
The whole "light skinned black men = pretty boys" is a crock of sh*t to me. Most of the light skinned guys I know are not pretty by any means I know a lot of pretty dark skinned guys. I've had my share of beige men and none of them were "pretty"; I don't like pretty arse men! I will admit I have a slight affinity for yellow men LMAO but I would not say I blatantly prefer them over anything; my preference is medium toned men! If anything many light skinned guys are trying to fight the pretty stereotype by being "extra" (whether it mean extra militant or "black" or "hood") to downplay that stereotype.
 
princessnad said:
LOL @ people talking about LSLH women and equating it to men. Long are the days that LS men have that advantage. Sure some women have a preference for LS but so many have a preference for DS that I can say that LSM are not in any higher demand than DS men, maybe less.

Maybe this guy can sense that you are so into him that you have lost all dignity and he is taking advantage of that. He can take advantage of any girl that is "into" any of his physical features to the point of ignoring all intelligence.
Click to expand...

What are you saying? If anything I left with my dignity intact b/c I didn't give it up to me. I may have taken a slight blow to my ego but that is repairable compared to feeling like I shared my body with a douche bag. It really pisses me off when some women on LHCF can not provide uplifting comments. If you don't have something constructive to say leave it alone. I sought the forum out for advice not for you to play psychoanalysist on someone you don't know and have only been given a brief synopsis of my situation. Because quite frankly at the end of the your comments are purely opinion and this is evident in your supply and demand opinion on people's preference? How do you know more ppl prefer DS over LS? are you basing this based on your geographical area? Do you work for the census? *rolls eyes*

Ugh...how do I close this damn thread?
 
And for further clarification--He initially approached me. I apparently didn't make that clear in my original post.
 
OP, your situation has nothing to do with skin color. Like, that is sooo far off.

My SO is light-skinned and he is farrrrrrrrrr from being high maintenance. I think you need to look at other aspects of the situation and not focus on skin color. Like others have said, maybe he's just not that into you.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top