Ladies what would you do? Crushing hard.

:nono:

hes-just-not-that-into-you.jpg


stop. you'll find another guy you like as much. you don't need this one, he's not the only one out there.

chris rock: "a guy meets his friend's girlfriend, he thinks man, she's really nice... i gotta get a girl LIKE THAT.

a woman meets her friend's boyfriend she thinks, man, he's really nice... i gotta get HIM."

:nono: STOP IMMEDIATELY. Btw, no offense but you look extremely desperate constantly going back to hound the waiter at Applebee's who told you he wasn't interested. And when he breaks up with his girlfriend and decides to tap what he knows is willing @ss, that's how he's going to view you.
 
No good can come from this situation if you pursue this dude.
As corny as it sounds "Just Say No"...
and find somewhere else to dine at...You might come off as a creeper.
 
he just wants to *** you


read what you wrote:
"HE HAS A GIRL" might be true but i think he might be lying
"he paid more attention to your cousin but it's okay all guys do that" where is your self esteem

you're going HARD for this guy and end well, this will not.

And yes, you're VERY pathetic.
 
mischka said:
Applebees isnt even good to patronize them repeatedly :nono: :cry3: what do you eat there?
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I was just about to say. Applebees is nasty as hell. He know's you're stalking him...you aint slick.

Seriously. The man is taken...Walk away from this situation :look:
 
Oh man...how about we just take me out back shoot my head off. GEEEESSSHHHH harsh harsh harsh. But I needed that. I can't tell how I look. I always think that someone would appreciate the attention but after reading what you guys think I guess not. How come a man can go after a woman over and over and over again and win but when a woman does it it's psycho and pathetic? I hate that. Granted he has a girl and that's reason enough to stop but just in general everyone thinks that it's creepy and pathetic and makes me a debbie downer with low self esteem. But when men do it he's confident and a go getter. It's not fair. I've seen this so many times when men get the woman who's not interested and he pursues and pursues and wins what he wants. Thanks for the overly blunt responses though. I will take it all in consideration and try not to cry myself to sleep from the bruises I've gotten from reading your responses.
 
You're not going after a guy. You are almost stalking a guy who HAS A GIRLFRIEND and has done nothing to encourage your attentions. If anything he has clearly discouraged them. Not the same thing.
 
Op this guy doesn't like you one bit! You see what you want to see in his eyes, but there is nothing there. Don't be desperate!! K.I.M. and don't be a homewrecker.
 
ZLUVSNEWZEE said:
Oh man...how about we just take me out back shoot my head off. GEEEESSSHHHH harsh harsh harsh. But I needed that. I can't tell how I look. I always think that someone would appreciate the attention but after reading what you guys think I guess not. How come a man can go after a woman over and over and over again and win but when a woman does it it's psycho and pathetic? Win what? Most of the time the guy is seen as pathetic as well. NO ONE likes thirstiness and you're coming off very much in need of a drink. I hate that. Granted he has a girl and that's reason enough to stop but just in general everyone thinks that it's creepy and pathetic and makes me a debbie downer with low self esteem. Tough love but the fact that you a) think it's ok he was more into your cousin than yourself b) Attempting (despite your protestations) to acquire a man who has already told you he has someone & c) Somehow got the game messed up wondering why the desperateness doesnt work for you.....well, it's not a stretch of the imagination. But when men do it he's confident and a go getter. It's not fair. I've seen this so many times when men get the woman who's not interested and he pursues and pursues and wins what he wants. Thanks for the overly blunt responses though. I will take it all in consideration and try not to cry myself to sleep from the bruises I've gotten from reading your responses.
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The only thing you'll be getting is a lay if anything and from what it looks like despite your stalking, he still isn't trying to holler.:nono: No one means to bruise or hurt you but it's obvious fom your post you need the candid truth for how you are coming across before you really come up with issues.
 
OP back away!

And for the record, we women are pursued tough by men like that are usually turned off.

Aside from this man it sounds like you need a healthy dose of self esteem!! It sounds like this isn't the first time you have pursed a man hard with a less than desirable result :nono: Also whoever keeps giving your number is a bad friend! She made you appear more desperate :/ with friends like that who needs enemies :(
 
Ok I just read ur second post. I feel a bit sorry for u but at the same time, I'm not going to baby you and you need to hear the truth. Were you expecting us to encourage you to take this woman's man? We know you would if you could, but he doesn't want you, so get over it! You basically already threw yourself at him and he is still rejecting you. The only thing I see u haven't done yet is to throw your panties at his feet. Leave him alone. If he even end up sleeping with you, he will never respect you because of how u stalked him.
 
OP, ask yourself this: If he was your man, and a girl like you came on to him repeatedly, how would you feel? Don't try to make him your priority. He doesn't even want you as an option. Whether he truly has a girl or not. Just find another establishment to hang out out. Remember out of site, out of mind.

Good Luck girl :up:
 
wait there's an applebees in SF? never knew that.

Anyway, like others have said, you need to lay off...I sort of crush hard myself, but not to the point that I exhibit "stalker acts", but I tend to find myself looking too deeply into everything like you have (i.e. how you look too deeply in how this guy stares at you)...you are seeing something that ISN'T there. I mean once he said he has a girl, you should have backed off...really, even if he did reciprocate some action that would indicate he was interested...then what?? Would you date a guy who is already in a relationship?
I honestly believe he was not interested from the jump...if he was, you most likely would not know he has a girl. I'm not trying to be mean or anything, but it seems like you already know ALL of this, but you just don't want to accept it. Do yourself a favor and let him go, and crush hard on a guy who deserves it :)
 
On a lighter note: I want you to stop going to his job before his girl meets you up there and curses you out. Or worse. You never know what side of the tracks she is from :)
 
Nelli04 said:
wait there's an applebees in SF? never knew that.
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I'm saying...I've never seen one and I live in SF (????) anyway, I'm not going to call you desperate and pathetic and tell you you have low self-esteem (because apparently, all of those harsh things have already been said :ohwell:) but I will tell you that no good will come of this :nono: stay away from him and stay away from Applebee's...seriously, Applebee's? In the city? Where there are literally hundreds of other great restaurants with probably equally-sexy (and maybe single) waiters? I'm just sayin...
 
itsjusthair88 said:
I'm saying...I've never seen one and I live in SF (????) anyway, I'm not going to call you desperate and pathetic and tell you you have low self-esteem (because apparently, all of those harsh things have already been said :ohwell:) but I will tell you that no good will come of this :nono: stay away from him and stay away from Applebee's...seriously, Applebee's? In the city? Where there are literally hundreds of other great restaurants with probably equally-sexy (and maybe single) waiters? I'm just sayin...
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Lol, I don't live in SF myself...but I know there's no applebees...maybe in daly city or south SF?

I hope I didn't come off too harsh, I just feel like the OP is torturing herself. I have crushed after guys who are taken, but you will not catch me purposely in the same vicinity as them...that would be torturous...
 
Thanks for sharing this op!!

My advice, let it go. Apparently the spark and attraction you felt didn't happen for him.
 
I would stop going to the restaurant.

If he didn't have a girlfriend I will not pursue anything, that's his job.

I agree with the other poster, "He's just not that into you" and personally I think that the situation is embarrassing.

All the best :)
 
Strike 1: he's a waiter at Applebees
Strike 2: he's a waiter at Applebees
Strike 3: he has a girlfriend

That is not HIS environment, that's his job. It's kind of stalkerish to keep going to that mans job- especially with how awkward of a situation this has gotten to be.Leave it alone. Find another restaurant to go



Sent from my Samsung Epic :)
 
ZLUVSNEWZEE said:
Oh man...how about we just take me out back shoot my head off. GEEEESSSHHHH harsh harsh harsh. But I needed that. I can't tell how I look. I always think that someone would appreciate the attention but after reading what you guys think I guess not. How come a man can go after a woman over and over and over again and win but when a woman does it it's psycho and pathetic? I hate that. Granted he has a girl and that's reason enough to stop but just in general everyone thinks that it's creepy and pathetic and makes me a debbie downer with low self esteem. But when men do it he's confident and a go getter. It's not fair. I've seen this so many times when men get the woman who's not interested and he pursues and pursues and wins what he wants. Thanks for the overly blunt responses though. I will take it all in consideration and try not to cry myself to sleep from the bruises I've gotten from reading your responses.
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If a man goes after a woman over and over, he's being creepy and stalkerish too. That's not a good thing to do. No means no.

Sent from my Samsung Epic :)
 
Well OP, you kind of asked for people's honest feedback and, you got it! Don't feel upset that the ladies here are just holding up a mirror so you can honestly see how you are making yourself look. And I have to agree. Stop pursuing this guy and find someone worthy. So....:look:how's that hair journey going?
 
If you don't want feedback (no matter how harsh that feedback may be) never post about your situation on an online forum.

The responses you're likely to get will range from kind to extremely critical as not everyone views things the same way.


I hope you come to see yourself as deserving of someone who is worthy of you OP. Is he honestly the best you can do? What is it about him that you can't find in a plethora of single, available men in your area?
 
Op, I know how it feels to crush on someone hard. As you mentioned, when you first saw this guy you were having the worst day of your life. When we have so many things going wrong in our lives, we sometimes tend to become a" dame in distress" and have a longing for someone to save us from what we are dealing with. Keep that in mind. Also hun, the moment he told you that he has a woman should have been an immediate turn off for you.
 
Sorry, OP. Sounds rough. Well, think about your past experiences. You say when you crush, you crush hard. And it sounds like you've "gone after" your crushes hard in the past, too. How has that worked out?
 
ZLUVSNEWZEE said:
How pathetic do you think I am?
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ZLUVSNEWZEE said:
Oh man...how about we just take me out back shoot my head off. GEEEESSSHHHH harsh harsh harsh. But I needed that. I can't tell how I look. I always think that someone would appreciate the attention but after reading what you guys think I guess not. How come a man can go after a woman over and over and over again and win but when a woman does it it's psycho and pathetic? I hate that. Granted he has a girl and that's reason enough to stop but just in general everyone thinks that it's creepy and pathetic and makes me a debbie downer with low self esteem. But when men do it he's confident and a go getter. It's not fair. I've seen this so many times when men get the woman who's not interested and he pursues and pursues and wins what he wants. Thanks for the overly blunt responses though. I will take it all in consideration and try not to cry myself to sleep from the bruises I've gotten from reading your responses.
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wah wah wah. you called your self pathetic. what do you want us to do? tell you that it's okay? And Ive had men come after me hard and one even came to my job and i thought it was creepy as fuk.

mwedzi said:
Sorry, OP. Sounds rough. Well, think about your past experiences. You say when you crush, you crush hard. And it sounds like you've "gone after" your crushes hard in the past, too. How has that worked out?
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obviously hasnt worked out.
 
Poor OP. :bighug: I hope you're not feeling too bad. Chalk it up as an unfortunate experience and move on. We've all (well a lot of us) have done things that we're not proud of.

You can do better, and you will do better. Think more positively and get the man you deserve. :yep:
 
Awwww OP, I feel bad and embarrassed for you. You posted this thread because deep down you know you're better than that. You know what you're doing is killing your spirit and making you feel worse. Stop calling yourself pathetic and punishing yourself,you didn't commit murder! Forgive yourself and move on.
 
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