Just want healthy hair- vent

[levette]

I have come to a resolution.

I want strong, healthy bouncy hair, my hair does not have to grow to mid-back, waistlength, tailbone or beyond. I just want my hair to look good, smell good and to keep hair on my head. Long hair is beautiful imo but there are other important things than that.
I have reflected upon all the $$$ and excess I have spent in a quest for long hair and coveting other's peoples's lengthy tresses. I could have been doing something more productive such as: putting that money in my savings account, reading books that will enhance my life - such as the Bible, talking more with loved ones, working on my grad school homework,- etc. That is my personal vent but do any of you feel the same way. When is enough, enough- when do we stop buying every hair product under the sun just because some long-haired member suggests it. - Do we have to wait until our hair falls out, our skin is burnt, etc. because of a product recommendation for longer hair- Do we have to count every strand that falls out of our heads. In the long run- have we made hair our personal idol.

 

[LadyRaider]

Your hair is a beautiful length now. I think it's a good time for you to sit back and just enjoy what you have. You can worry about more later if you want.

 

[My Friend]

You've made some great points Since you've been on the board since 2002 maybe take a break and do other things that you feel you have missed out on or neglected.

 

[OsnapCnapp!]

Very good post, thumbs up. You're so right. I feel like hair shouldn't be an emphatic part of our being. I don't think that hair will be such a big matter in the life here after. Having healthier hair should be more important than having longer hair....because longer hair is the outcome of healthier hair. But allover hair shouldn't be in the forefront. A healthy body and healthy mind should be our main focus. But the same as some people obsess over cars, clothes, electronics, etc.....some people obsess over hair and the products that are supposed to grow it. Some people are turning their hair and growing their hair into something that is....materialistic it seems! So your mind is in the right place. I think it should be simple. Moisturize, deep condition, wash. If you have bad places in your hair, maybe try one product and stick with that. But overall health and happiness (no stress) and rest will be the ultimate key to growing hair because I know over time the money spent on buying hair products has to stress you out to some extent.

But hey if you got it to spend and you want to spend it on hair then by all means do you. That is what I think when I see people spending $22 on an 8 oz bottle of something.

 

[LittleLuxe]

Very interesting pov, I always reflect on what hair really means whenever a member posts about having chemo and suddenly finding their HHJ the least of their worries.

I think somehow if we simply tried to improve ourselves from the inside all things on the outside will follow.

You've got beautiful hair, take a break and enjoy what you have.

 

[hopeful]

I understand what you are saying. I haven't been jumping on any bandwagons and realize that the really long-haired ladies keep it very simple and do not spend lots of $ on products. Bottom-line, keep it simple, keep it clean, detangled, conditioned, moisturized & leave it alone.

 

[soldierforhair]

Your hair is strong, long and healthy.

 

[30something]

Wow, i have made the same resolution quiet recently too. I notice before my HHJ I didn't do much to my hair at all besides wrap it at night and it was still SL/APL.. not an amazing length but I got there some how with out all the excess. I made a realization if my hair is healthy and taken care of it looks good regardless of length. Also concluded that healthy doesn't necessarily mean only 2 broken pieces of hair on wash day.

You hair looks great! I hope your resolution and brought you some peace.

 

[Imani]

I have been here since 06 and have taken breaks from the board from time to time. Either out of frustration or just busy. I think I went like about a year one time and never came on the hair boards, just the other topics. I have learned a lot of here, but definitely don't jump on bandwagons or have to try new products all the time any more like I did when I first got on.

The one time I actually reached one of my goals, I wasn't even on the forum much at all. I had been bunning, baggying, etc. And just got tired of looking ugly, and decided to wear my hair out when i wanted to and was getting blow dried and flat ironed (roots with marcel irons) weekly and my hair was fabulous.

Now, I'm back on bc I'm transitioning. Once I get my staple transitioning/natural products and techniques down, I probably will take another break. And just post my updates in any length challenges I'm in.

 

[Chrissmiss]

I don't think that growing long hair requires all that much. I actually believe the less you do the better. No offense to anyone but alot of people on this board do take it a little over board. Trying hundereds of products, growth aids, and washing their hair everyday. That's too much work for me. The people with the longest hair do the least to it. They wash, conditon, keep it moisturized and just leave it be. Hair is my little hobby so I do like to keep a journal and take progress pics, but you can't make your hair run you life. Good luck on your resolution

 

[LittleLuxe]

Well your hair is gorgeous chrissmiss

 

[MinaSinclair]

I really enjoyed this post. I've been lurking here since 08 and one reason (along with fear of addiction) I didn't subscribe was feeling I didn't have what it took to justify being here. From the outside looking in, you read the regimens and the dedication and it can be scary, to say the least.

I have added info found here into what I call my "now and then" and seen some wonderful changes and I've decided that's all that matters. I've always been relatively good to my hair just needed more info on the possibilities.

Your hair is georgeous. To use one line I've seen here I like the most, "Relax and let grow".

 

[newbeginnings2010]

I've been here since 2004 under a different screen name and I feel the same. I got way too overwhelmed and gave up before reaching my goals because all of the long-haired ladies seem to have magically appeared at WL. When I decided to come back, I made a promise to myself that I would NOT stress about growth and progress and setbacks. My hair is just one of MANY parts of my life. It has its ups and downs...although I do talk about it a lot......

 

[Bigmommah]

It's good that you've clarified what you want on your journey. When I was younger the mother's in the church had a great saying when it came to information "Eat the meat and spit out the bones". You seem to have found what the meat of hair health means to you by sampling a lot of the "dishes" served here. Now that you have, enjoy being full and walk away from the table.

 

[newbeginnings2010]

Very interesting pov, I always reflect on what hair really means whenever a member posts about having chemo and suddenly finding their HHJ the least of their worries.

I think somehow if we simply tried to improve ourselves from the inside all things on the outside will follow.

You've got beautiful hair, take a break and enjoy what you have.

I'm doing this, too. Trying to improve my health and just figuring that the hair will follow eventually.

 

[brucebettye]

I agree with u. I like this site and the information that I have received. I have healthy hair and my length is coming. So I keep it simple and don't let it cosume my life.

 

[levette]

I do love this hair site and my hair has grown and gotten thicker since I have been a member here. Without this site, I would not know about co-washing, braidouts, stretching relaxers. I have this website to thank for all of the beneficial information. For the longest time, I wanted my hair to get full below bra-strap. But now, I realize that I need to prioritize my efforts on other things. I do not wish to discourage anyone from growing their hair but wanted to merely say- Take it easy, there are other things to stress over versus:
worrying about than growing your hair extremely long or coveting another's hair length or copying someone's hair regime or trying all of these hair products at the first mention of it.

 

[locabouthair]

You're right. There are much more important things to worry about other than hair. I do feel a little sad because I have not reached my goals and many of the women on here have but I'm healthy, I'm alive and in the grand scheme of things hair isn't important.

I dont want to say I will give up on having the hair I want but there are other more important things I could be focusing on.

btw, OP your hair is beautiful.

 

[divachyk]

I'm a newbie and feel very defeated most days. It seems the more you do to your hair, the more your hair requires. It's kind of like the hair gets use to the pampering and doesn't function well without it. I have been an effortless grower -- grew to full BSL with doing very little to it. Life took a toll and I lost some of the length. I'm now somewhere beyond SL but not quite BSB -- not sure what length that's called. Anyway, now that I'm trying to grow my hair back, it seems impossible. Now that's frustrating.

 

[Nix08]

I've been thoroughly enjoying my hair journey. I've learned so much and my hair is responding well. I'm excited to reach my goal and look forward to giving my 2 year old daughter options when she gets older. For me this has been fun and exciting (but I guess I'm still early on and haven't had a set back yet).

 

[princessdi]

I'm with you girl. I have been thinking about all the money that I've invested in hair care since I started my journey in 2006 and it's literally sickening to me. I started out jumping on every bandwagon there was and some of it worked but most of it didn't. What I've learned is that my hair will grow if I just invest a little time in it. It's not about the products you use, it's about how you care for your tresses and in the past, I just wasn't taking care of my hair so it was breaking faster than it was growing and I wasn’t seeing any noticeable growth. Because of that I was lead to believe that my hair would never grow.

Well, I've reached my turning point. I have a 5 year old son who is starting kindergarten this year and the money that I have THROWN AWAY in products should have been invested in a college fund for him. Trust me, I have spent lots of money!

When is enough, ENOUGH? Well, it's now for me. This new year for me will be more focused on family and education. Now, don't get me wrong, I will still care for my hair but I won't be buying lots of new products and jumping on every bandwagon there is. I think I've found my staple products and that's what I'm sticking with.

As always, good luck in your hair care journey ladies. Remember, it's not about the products you use, rather, it's all in how you care for your hair.

PATIENCE is key!

 

[prettybyrd]

I came to this site because I needed to get information about taking better care of my hair after a few mishaps. My HHJ was non-existent prior to, and it wasn't until this site that I began learning best practices for natural hair care.

I admit that I want long hair. Very long hair, actually; but I want healthy hair moreover. With good healthy practices, my hair is bound to grow to the lengths I desire. I am not interested in buying into every gimmick to get the long hair (though I think I would probably rub horse sweat on my temples if it would grow them in fuller) and I don't want to spend too much time in pursuit of long hair when all I really need is a nice simple regimen.

You've come to a great conclusion, Levette.