I've been initiated...

[glamazon386]

it sounds like he didn't care for the style. my dh told me that my hair looks fine, but he just doesn't care for the natural look. he likes it straight. as long as you are happy with you styles then that is all that matters.

A lot of black people, not just men, are still conditioned to think this way. I think that's part of the reason why it's so hard to go natural in the first place. "Going Relaxed" isn't a process. We're afraid of how people will react to it, how we will look, what people will think, etc. We think that people won't find us attractive anymore and so on down the line. And it's worse if you don't have curls and/or waves. It's not an easy thing to do.

I think we have to remember that for years wearing our hair out in it's natural state was considered unkempt, shameful, etc. or you were thought to be poor (bc you couldn't afford to get your hair done), dirty, etc. Some people still subscribe to that line of thinking. That's part of the reason why we straightened our hair in the first place in addition to manageability, assimilation, etc. We have been conditioned to think that straight hair is more acceptable.

In the 70's natural hair became popular but then it fizzled out. I think that it's starting to come into the mainstream again (more and more people are going natural everyday. You see mostly naturals on television now.) and I hope it stays for good this time.

 

[Solitude]

Oh my God...I would have been so hurt.

I'm sorry this happened to you.

 

[so1913]

Well girlie, guess me and you will rock the buckwheat look together! All I can say is rock it proud, there will ALWAYS be nay sayers, but that feeling you had when you looked in the mirror and liked what you saw should triumph how anyone not having to wear your hair feels about it

After being natural for so many years, I'm so happy with it...adverse comments don't phase me anymore...and you will get to that point to if you hang in there

 

[backtonature]

for "to go join the rest of the little rascals" but I don't blame you for being up set, my feelings would of been hurt too

 

[LoveLiLi]

Well girlie, guess me and you will rock the buckwheat look together! All I can say is rock it proud, there will ALWAYS be nay sayers, but that feeling you had when you looked in the mirror and liked what you saw should triumph how anyone not having to wear your hair feels about it

After being natural for so many years, I'm so happy with it...adverse comments don't phase me anymore...and you will get to that point to if you hang in there

Girl, your hair is gorgeous and I've been admiring your WNG for a while now. So now that my hair is completely natural and I can rock the natural look, and it looked like one of my hair idol's - that's all I need. I was hurt by his comments, but I like to think my taste in fashion and beauty is superior to his . I'll be wearing it out again, no question.

 

[LoveLiLi]

I just put your card in the mail

My initiation came from my SO telling me I looked like a lighter, skinnier Jill Scott -- so basically nothing like her. Then his BIL asked me if I fell in the pool.

IDK, maybe he just had a different impression of your hair texture; you know we look 3bish when our hair is wet. I love your reaction though -- HILARIOUS!

(On another note, how did you get your hair like that in your sig? It's goooorgeous!)

Thanks! That day I had a fresh trim and the stylist used a blow dryer and hot comb. I liked her, but I don't know if I'll return because that was a-lot of heat and I could hear some of the hairs snapping as she pulled the hot comb through .

I get it just as straight, but with less volume on my own. I shampoo, deep condition w/ heat for 30 minutes (Kenra or Alter Ego) and rinse. Then I add leave-in (Elucence MB or AG Fast Food) and I put ~ a quarter sized dollop of Sabino Moisture Block on each of 4 sections.

I then air dry or sit under the dryer if I'm in a hurry. I add SMB to four sections again, but a bit less, then flat iron in small sections.