ProtectiveStyling
New Member
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Is he crazy or did he hit it & quit it???
- Thread starter ProtectiveStyling
- Start date
10WordzOrLess
New Member
The advice is the same whether he's crazy or he hit it & quit it: Tell your cousin to move on. If he comes back around later wanting to apologize and start over, etc., say no and move on. Not worth the trouble
Agreed, tell her to move on. She'll learn.
ProtectiveStyling
New Member
i sure will!... i just couldnt make sense out of any of it for her. im like WTF??? i just told her to move on & he's probably depressed or crazy
Mai Tai
Miss Nigeria-America
Ok...so...why is your cousin jumping through all these hoops to try and get answers to what's going on with this dude, when she already has the answer. He doesn't want her, and she knows it. The fact that she is waiting around for him, calling him from other people's phones and whatnot is what's crazy. Tell cuzz to get a grip on reality, have some dignity, and move on...
ProtectiveStyling
New Member
i agree, but i think she was just confused. Me nor anyone she has talked to understands the situation. the love thing threw us all off... but she has moved on from what i hear & see. just super curious
onyxdreams
Well-Known Member
Even with confusion she should have some dignity and stop searching for him.It sounds like the girl and the guy might have set-up your cousin. I wouldn't reach out to either of them she might be their private joke.
ProtectiveStyling
New Member
i never thought of it that way, but u have a point! me and my boyfriend made sure she deleted his numbers... & told her if he do decides to write back to ignore it
ProtectiveStyling
New Member
Are you sure this happened to your "cousin" and not you? LOL Sike.
Well, he is 24 so I don't really expect him to act really mature about the whole thing.
i knew someone would say that
no ma'am i am in a happy relationship & if it was me i wouldnt have a problem saying it. I dnt have any pics of my face nor my real name on here lol. We're close & she has talked my ear off about this...
tarheelgurl
Well-Known Member
That whole texting thing really kinda put her in the trifling category right along with him. Its only been one month and if he hadn't called after a couple of days she needs to move on the next one. All that '...just say so if you want to break up' gives him way too much power for a one month LD relationship. She should relax and start dating some other guys.
texasqt
Well-Known Member
Ummm............ummmm.......... You're cousin messed up. The OPs last paragraph explains part of it. Cousin is already acting like his ex who he broke up with for the very same outrageous behavior. I'm just saying.
People go through stuff but we always have a choice in how we respond. Sending numerous text messages with curse words and calling numerous times - I wouldn't respond either to avoid confrontation OR my response would be equal if not more. Granted cousin was hurt & felt slighted - if the shoe was on the other foot and he was blowing up her phone would she not think he was not who she thought he was.
Cousin is feeling a certain way because they slept together early on but she willingly made that choice. Not trying to be harsh towards the cousin because they are both wrong but I had to point out her roll. Been there done that. Learn from it. Move on and try to remember when you bow out - bow out gracefully.
People go through stuff but we always have a choice in how we respond. Sending numerous text messages with curse words and calling numerous times - I wouldn't respond either to avoid confrontation OR my response would be equal if not more. Granted cousin was hurt & felt slighted - if the shoe was on the other foot and he was blowing up her phone would she not think he was not who she thought he was.
Cousin is feeling a certain way because they slept together early on but she willingly made that choice. Not trying to be harsh towards the cousin because they are both wrong but I had to point out her roll. Been there done that. Learn from it. Move on and try to remember when you bow out - bow out gracefully.
ProtectiveStyling
New Member
all u ladies opinions are really helpful & funny (bow out- bow out gracefully) lol... but she's a pretty and smart girl so she'll get it together soon. plus she has me & i ddnt really like him anyway. always wondered what she saw in him... but she'll be fine im sure, especially from 1 month of dating...
Nightingale
On the Grow and Keeping it Simple
She will never know what happened. Tell her to not look for an answer or closure. Just move on. If he contacts her (and there is a good possibility he will when it is convenient for him) she needs to ignore him. Do not respond or answer.
I speak from experience. Usually they always reappear after going ghost.
ETA: One more thing, NEVER chase after a man. If a guy misses a date, I may contact him ONCE. No anger or attitude. Anything more will just feed his ego and give him something to show his friends when he claims you are the crazy one.
I speak from experience. Usually they always reappear after going ghost.
ETA: One more thing, NEVER chase after a man. If a guy misses a date, I may contact him ONCE. No anger or attitude. Anything more will just feed his ego and give him something to show his friends when he claims you are the crazy one.
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ProtectiveStyling
New Member
U hit it dead on with this!!! i experienced this once & he blew me up once i ddnt call or text
Windsy
New Member
1) he may have serious emotional problems and could be going through something.
2) your cousin cussing him via text and what not didn't help the situation; neither did her constant asking of the friend; I'm certain the friend is telling him that your cousin is asking about him.
3) I say leave him alone and KIM
2) your cousin cussing him via text and what not didn't help the situation; neither did her constant asking of the friend; I'm certain the friend is telling him that your cousin is asking about him.
3) I say leave him alone and KIM
ChasingBliss
Well-Known Member
Wow, I always found it amazing how someone could have so much detail when posting about someone else's story. You're a very caring friend. I dont think I could remember all those details for someone else.
She should definitely drop that situation. Be glad more time has not been put into it too.
She should definitely drop that situation. Be glad more time has not been put into it too.
ProtectiveStyling
New Member
this isnt a friend of mines, its my family. the details can go on forever because i listen and she calls me with everything. she repeats stuff a lot & ask what i think on everything so i have to listen. i wouldnt have a problem if this was me and my story because we are all strangers & via web.... & i agree about the time thing
ChasingBliss
Well-Known Member
I'm Remembering those days when I had a friend or two who did the bolded. Yeah, I guess I can see how you would remember it all.
I hope she'll find the lessons in that situation. No matter what happens to me or what stupid part I may have played, I always try to find the lesson. Know what mistakes NOT to make again.
ProtectiveStyling
New Member
i think we all have friends like that lol... can be really annoying at times too
im thinking about letting her see this post because all the replies are good, but idk how she would take it 
maybe next week or so
ChasingBliss
Well-Known Member
i think we all have friends like that lol... can be really annoying at times too
yeah, give it a few days. Let her get some inner calm first. At least I hope she will. If this dude starts making contact with her again and she allows him to take her on another roller coaster ride....well. I dunno.
ProtectiveStyling
New Member
if he makes contact with her and she writes back im done! & im def showing her this post so she can see how foolish she is lol!! he wasn't even cute, if u ask me... ive already saved the post in case i cant find it in a couple days 
... ive already saved the post in case i cant find it in a couple days I think she may have freaked him out and come across as just a bit crazy. So he talked to her on Monday, but didn't communicate on Tuesday and then she started sending the angry texts? I think that would have freaked me out too. The cursing and asking if he wanted to break up constantly in each text was kinda over the top. Maybe he really did like her to begin with, but I wonder if she scared him off.
The way I interpret the friend's response would be her knowing dude is freaked out, and possibly agreeing that your cousin over-reacted, but not wanting to tell your cousin this.
She needs to move on. I would never call/text a guy more than a couple of times if I'm not getting a response. He knows how to reach me.
The way I interpret the friend's response would be her knowing dude is freaked out, and possibly agreeing that your cousin over-reacted, but not wanting to tell your cousin this.
She needs to move on. I would never call/text a guy more than a couple of times if I'm not getting a response. He knows how to reach me.
I know I get in a mood when I'm stressed and I don't want to talk to anyone.
Though I don't ignore people, I just wont log onto Facebook and it could be a whole day before I pick up my phone to check my messages.
That being said: If I was involved with someone (esp. if I "loved" them) I would make it a point to communicate with them. So IDK what's going on with the guy, but it's probably more trouble than it's worth unless he comes up with a seriously good explanation and starts behaving better.
IMO your cousin seemed a little extra w/ cussing him out two days after not hearing from him. But he should have responded with something.
Though I don't ignore people, I just wont log onto Facebook and it could be a whole day before I pick up my phone to check my messages.
That being said: If I was involved with someone (esp. if I "loved" them) I would make it a point to communicate with them. So IDK what's going on with the guy, but it's probably more trouble than it's worth unless he comes up with a seriously good explanation and starts behaving better.
IMO your cousin seemed a little extra w/ cussing him out two days after not hearing from him. But he should have responded with something.
imaccami
New Member
The sex was bad, and they've only been dating a month. He texted Monday but not Tuesday and she goes crazy swearing and sending thousands of messages. It makes her look crazy. She knew he had to pick up more shifts at work and even if he didn't, if he doesn't want to call, what will stalking him do? He's thinking that if she acts that way after him not texting one day, what will she do if they've dated a year and he wants to break up. If it wasn't over after the sex-fail, it was definitely over after her over the top behavior.
onyxdreams
Well-Known Member
Like I said earlier I think they set her up,he wanted a taste the other girl helped him get to your cousin and now that she is asking questions they are dodging her. Whatever the case maybe she isn't married to this guy so she needs to step back,heal herself/her ego and move on.
I think when women meet a guy from another woman we are more likely o let our guard down. That may not be the case. I had a friend that might a guy in a similar way but the girl that set them up knew he was trash yet assist with the meeting and dating.
Let your cousin know we all make mistakes but our reaction is what we are judged by sometimes.
I think when women meet a guy from another woman we are more likely o let our guard down. That may not be the case. I had a friend that might a guy in a similar way but the girl that set them up knew he was trash yet assist with the meeting and dating.
Let your cousin know we all make mistakes but our reaction is what we are judged by sometimes.
ProtectiveStyling
New Member
thank you all for your responses, i have saved this thread & will be showing it to her whenever i feel the time is right. hopefully i wont have to depending how she moves on... & im not trying to damage the trust she was for me.. but im glad i came here for opinions! ill be sharing some with her, but as my own opinions of course lol
GeorginaSparks
Well-Known Member
Your cousin sounds crazy. She chased him away by texting him after not hearing from him by 2pm the in ONE day. If I were the guy I would RUN too.
