I'm thinking about cutting the stylist out all together...

[ShiShiPooPoo]

The only reason I go to the salon is to get touchups. This last time she underprocessed my hair and I had to redo it myself anyway. My hair is getting pretty long though and I don't know if I can do it without overlapping and stuff.

I know my hair better than anybody and now it just seems silly to keep going and having to explain everytime "I want my hair straight" and "don't trim/ don't trim too much" etc....when I can just do it myself.


I know what you guys think already...

I may do my own touchups and go to the salon once per month to get it styled instead of the other way around...I don't know. Thanks for letting me think "out loud"

 

[soulie]

I have a stylist that only trims what I want and I've been afraid to attempt my own trims, so that's the only reason I have to go to a salon. I can do everything else for myself.

 

[Chevelure618]

Personally, I think relaxing should be left in the hands of a good professional. Relaxing, although common, and so many box kits out there is a very serious procedure. We are basically melting down the structure of the hair. I couldn't trust myself to get the back anyway.

I know a lot of ladies here do it themselves and I HATE going to the salon just to get badgered and talked down to, but that is the one thing I think the stylists are better at. Not always, but mostly.

 

[tarheelgurl]

I leave the relaxing to my stylist. I can't see the back of my head and am too un-coordinated to do the back without overlapping. Maybe point out what she has done wrong to her next time to keep you both on the same page.

 

[SlantedEyezMiss2003]

U know I was thinking about going back to my stylist because of my underprocess relaxers, but the con---she makes my hair too straight, and she cuts my hair.......but then again I don't know, I feel you though, I don't want anyone to cut my hair because I dust my ends once a month or when needed, and I don't want someone to say oh you need a trim since you haven't had one.....I mean it's only been aug since I had a big cut, just I'm making so much progress and I just don't want to see my hair over the floor.....I don't know what to tell you because I'm in that not sure stage.....I hope your find out your answer though.....

 

[ajacks]

I am terrified of doing chemical treatments cuts myself. Fortunately I have a stylist that I trust with these services.

 

[localhost]

I do my own relaxers and trims, and my hair is the healthiest when I do it myself. I tried relying on a stylist over the last year and my hair suffered for it. The only service I'll go for now is a sew-in weave. Just like you, I'm tired of explaining and defending the basics.

 

[supermodelsonya]

I say......."GOOD RIDDANCE!"

 

[janeemat]

Personally, I think relaxing should be left in the hands of a good professional. Relaxing, although common, and so many box kits out there is a very serious procedure. We are basically melting down the structure of the hair. I couldn't trust myself to get the back anyway.

I know a lot of ladies here do it themselves and I HATE going to the salon just to get badgered and talked down to, but that is the one thing I think the stylists are better at. Not always, but mostly.

I'm glad you added not always, because my trip to the salon for a relaxer on Saturday was a disaster. Now granted, my previous hair stylist was wonderiful in applying my relaxer and color. He overprocessed me once but he was really good. The problem is he raised his price to $125 which I refuse to pay for a relaxer. I'm planning to become a self relaxer.

 

[morehairplease]

I do my own relaxers and trims, and my hair is the healthiest when I do it myself. I tried relying on a stylist over the last year and my hair suffered for it. The only service I'll go for now is a sew-in weave. Just like you, I'm tired of explaining and defending the basics.

co-signing. My last salon experience was the worst for me. I am stretching and getting braids soon to transition back to natural. I plan on following the crown & glory method and flat ironing for length checks. There is a salon in the mall that I plan on going for my trims(the scissors they use have numbers on them and you tell them how much you want trim/dusted off which I think is just too cool). What I have noticed is that when I take care of my hair it does better than when a 'professional' does it. I just hate that I have been so unlucky in finding a stylist in my area that I could trust with my hair b/c I would rather be relaxed than natural(my hair knots and catches on itself way too much) but I just can't chance it with the chemical, I'm afraid I will be bald headed from the abuse done by stylists here.

 

[SelfStyled]

It took me one salon horror story after I started my HHJ to decide I could do it better my D*** self.

I have not looked back since. Each touchup I do comes out better and better. There is no one on this planet, that will nurture my hair as much as I will.

I now have more money to spend on products and my salon is open whenever I need it to be with no lines, no waiting, no gossip, no drama, no kids running around.....you get the picture.

Good Luck.

 

[ShiShiPooPoo]

I do my own relaxers and trims, and my hair is the healthiest when I do it myself. I tried relying on a stylist over the last year and my hair suffered for it. The only service I'll go for now is a sew-in weave. Just like you, I'm tired of explaining and defending the basics.[/quote]


Yes! This is why I am frustrated. If I say I want my hair bone straight then do that. She tried to tell me my hair was straight and she basically texlaxed it. Now, this is after I have been to her several times and she knows how I like my hair and has done exactly that until this last time. Now are you starting to slack off just because you feel like you have won me over? Now you can start NOT doing what I ask you to do? I don't think so...

I asked my DH last night if he would feel comfortable trimming my hair and he said yes. I think he will be extra careful because hey let's face it...he is going to really care if he does something wrong so I know he'll be extra careful.

I am tired of the inconsistencies when it comes to these stylists...hell! Just be consistent...is that too much to ask????????????????/

 

[locabouthair]

OP, I totally feel you.

Like everyone else I was VERY scared to do my own touchup. But after getting several broken patches from stylists not neutralizing well. I said it's either I go natural or relax it myself cause I sure wasnt gonna keep paying someone to keep damaging my hair. I started a thread last year with pics of the damage at my nape, which was GONE. I said never again. I can damage my hair for free.

I do go for wash and sets because mine dont come out as well as theirs. But let them relax my hair-Helllllllllllll NO!!!!!

I still have a spot I'm trying to grow back from the last stylist

Everytime I think about letting a stylist relax my hair again, I remember everyone that would come up to me and asked what happened to my hair. For people to continuously ask you what's wrong with your hair (out the blue) is very hurtful.

Thats why I havent reach any of my hair goals because I have to keep waiting for broken parts to grow back.

Sorry I wrote a book but me and my hair been through some thangs

 

[Supergirl]

ShiShi,

I would usually agree with those that said that we should let the professionals deal with the chemicals BUT I am feeling like you are these days. My "professionals" aren't handling business with my hair and it's causing me setbacks. I am a DIYer until it comes to relaxer touch-ups. But I am planning to attempt self-relaxing once again until I get it right.

I don't know if you have seen London Diva's blog, but she relaxes her hair in 3 separate sections and neutralizes one section before going on to relax the next. I am pretty confident that I could do that. And then we have Anky (now Angelicus) who relaxes the top half of her hair and then waits a few days and relaxes the bottom half. That also sounds doable IMO. I *believe* that with all the resources available right here on LHCF, we can become 100% DIYers. Good luck. Maybe we can be buddies as we transition to being 100% DIYers.

 

[locabouthair]

And then we have Anky (no Angelicus) who relaxes the top half of her hair and then waits a few days and relaxes the bottom half. That also sounds doable IMO.

This is exactly what I do. My first time I tried doing my whole head at once, my hair didnt look like a relaxer even touched it

Doing it the half and half way gave me much better results.

Now if I can just master rollersetting, I'll be good.

 

[Supergirl]

This is exactly what I do. My first time I tried doing my whole head at once, my hair didnt look like a relaxer even touched it

Doing it the half and half way gave me much better results.

Now if I can just master rollersetting, I'll be good.

Really? So do you wait 2 days or 3 days between the top & the bottom? I bet that works out wonderfully.

 

[locabouthair]

^yeah I relax the top one day and wait 4 days to relax the bottom half.

 

[Angelicus]

"You can do it! You can do it real good!" Break free!

 

[ShiShiPooPoo]

Then I stopped in a salon yesterday and they charge TWENTY DOLLARS for the steam treatment?????????? Come on now, I almost laughed in that girls face. You charge that for steaming up some water and letting it blow on my head?????????????????????????????


They are just getting ridiculous. Everything they do I can do at home. The relaxing thing I will just have to perfect that just like I did everything else. I am a fast learner when it comes to hair.

 

[localhost]

Yes! This is why I am frustrated. If I say I want my hair bone straight then do that. She tried to tell me my hair was straight and she basically texlaxed it. Now, this is after I have been to her several times and she knows how I like my hair and has done exactly that until this last time. Now are you starting to slack off just because you feel like you have won me over? Now you can start NOT doing what I ask you to do? I don't think so...

I asked my DH last night if he would feel comfortable trimming my hair and he said yes. I think he will be extra careful because hey let's face it...he is going to really care if he does something wrong so I know he'll be extra careful.

I am tired of the inconsistencies when it comes to these stylists...hell! Just be consistent...is that too much to ask????????????????/

Girl, Yessssssss! They don't LISTEN!! They reach a point where they feel they know what's best and we don't have a say in how our hair is treated.

I remember going to a salon for a relaxer, and when I told the lady I didn't want a trim, she argued that my ends were going to split all the way up. But I replied that I had a trim only 8 weeks ago, it's excessive. Don't do it. This chicken got to blow drying my hair after the relaxer and proceeded to purposely stab me in the head with the comb attachment repeatedly as she was drying. I was too through!! Broken hairs all over my shirt! That's when I walked away determined to learn how to self relax, and I've been better off ever since.

Then in 08, I decided to go to another stylist, and she can't even get it right half the time. How hard is a sew-in, I mean really? I had to go back to her to redo the top part because it was looking like a $10 wig! Sometimes you have to go in with guns blazing to get stuff done right, it seems . Most stylists only know how to make the hair look good (temporarily) and they don't care about the health of the hair, or that you might be trying to grow your hair out. They have no idea that regular use of heat at a high temp is bad, or that deep conditioning after a relaxer is needed. I figure, why pay someone to overlap and dry my hair out when I can do it for free at home

 

[baddison]

It took me one salon horror story after I started my HHJ to decide I could do it better my D*** self.

I have not looked back since. Each touchup I do comes out better and better. There is no one on this planet, that will nurture my hair as much as I will.

I now have more money to spend on products and my salon is open whenever I need it to be with no lines, no waiting, no gossip, no drama, no kids running around.....you get the picture.

Good Luck.

Now, I KNOW dat's right!!!!

 

[ShiShiPooPoo]

Girl, Yessssssss! They don't LISTEN!! They reach a point where they feel they know what's best and we don't have a say in how our hair is treated.

I remember going to a salon for a relaxer, and when I told the lady I didn't want a trim, she argued that my ends were going to split all the way up. But I replied that I had a trim only 8 weeks ago, it's excessive. Don't do it. This chicken got to blow drying my hair after the relaxer and proceeded to purposely stab me in the head with the comb attachment repeatedly as she was drying. I was too through!! Broken hairs all over my shirt! That's when I walked away determined to learn how to self relax, and I've been better off ever since.

Then in 08, I decided to go to another stylist, and she can't even get it right half the time. How hard is a sew-in, I mean really? I had to go back to her to redo the top part because it was looking like a $10 wig! Sometimes you have to go in with guns blazing to get stuff done right, it seems . Most stylists only know how to make the hair look good (temporarily) and they don't care about the health of the hair, or that you might be trying to grow your hair out. They have no idea that regular use of heat at a high temp is bad, or that deep conditioning after a relaxer is needed. I figure, why pay someone to overlap and dry my hair out when I can do it for free at home

Exactly. I told this girl that I workout and that my hair would puff up because it is not straight. She said "I promise you it is straight" Whatever. Sure enough, I went walking the next day and my hair puffed up like a little afro at the root.
I know someone else who's hair is broke off at the nape because the stylists is not neutralizing and rinsing that part good enough. I mean COME ON. Aren't these the basic things they learn in school? How to rinse a chemical, deep conditioning, etc. Alot of them are just money hungry...trying to move heads.

Some time ago I tried relaxing in sections but the other sections got wet. I may try to do it over a couple of days (back section, then front section) and see how that works. I think I'll be able to handle that.

 

[Supergirl]

I do my own relaxers and trims, and my hair is the healthiest when I do it myself. I tried relying on a stylist over the last year and my hair suffered for it. The only service I'll go for now is a sew-in weave. Just like you, I'm tired of explaining and defending the basics.[/quote]


Yes! This is why I am frustrated. If I say I want my hair bone straight then do that. She tried to tell me my hair was straight and she basically texlaxed it. Now, this is after I have been to her several times and she knows how I like my hair and has done exactly that until this last time. Now are you starting to slack off just because you feel like you have won me over? Now you can start NOT doing what I ask you to do? I don't think so...

I asked my DH last night if he would feel comfortable trimming my hair and he said yes. I think he will be extra careful because hey let's face it...he is going to really care if he does something wrong so I know he'll be extra careful.

I am tired of the inconsistencies when it comes to these stylists...hell! Just be consistent...is that too much to ask????????????????/

It does seem like there's a point where a stylist might get comfortable with the client and very lax in her professionalism and practice with that client.

 

[nmomma]

You ladies are so right, I started self relaxing in college because the area I went to school in had few ethnic salons there. When I graduated I moved to a larger city searching for a stylist only to find out that the prices they charge are ridiculus, some even charge a la carte services. One price for a relaxer, then extra for a trim, deep conditioner, steam service etc. Don't even get me started on trims. If they say you need a trim and you insist you don't or you recently have had one, they will argue with you tooth and nail about how "sistas" love to hold on to some damaged ends and then proceed to try and wear you down by telling you how "damaged" your ends look.

The bottom line is we all want bouncey shiney hair and no one knows your hair better than you do. I say if you want something done right, do it yourself.

 

[jeabai]

I don't know what I'm going to do. My experience a week ago had me in tears for 3 days! 6 months of work gone because she pulled relaxer through my hair and cut about 2 inches off the back. I was so upset I didn't even post my pikistrip. But I'm afraid to relax myself. I think she cut my hair so that she could charge me $10 for it. She didn't have to do that because I would have tipped her that much. That was the first time that I did not tip a stylist!

 

[ShiShiPooPoo]

I don't know what I'm going to do. My experience a week ago had me in tears for 3 days! 6 months of work gone because she pulled relaxer through my hair and cut about 2 inches off the back. I was so upset I didn't even post my pikistrip. But I'm afraid to relax myself. I think she cut my hair so that she could charge me $10 for it. She didn't have to do that because I would have tipped her that much. That was the first time that I did not tip a stylist!

See?

That's a shame! They know how important our hair is to us. Some of them just don't care. How can you just go against someone's wishes like that?

 

[India*32]

Ladies, that's it. I might as well relax my own hair and call it a day. The last time I had a touch up, since I'm in micro braids now, the stylist talked about her money and living arrangements. I mean I'm sympathic, but too much is going on while doing my hair. I've been getting my hair relaxed for over 30 years, I think by now what needs to be done. I'm going for it.

 

[SmartyPants]

Personally, I think relaxing should be left in the hands of a good professional. Relaxing, although common, and so many box kits out there is a very serious procedure. We are basically melting down the structure of the hair. I couldn't trust myself to get the back anyway.

I know a lot of ladies here do it themselves and I HATE going to the salon just to get badgered and talked down to, but that is the one thing I think the stylists are better at. Not always, but mostly.

I relaxed my own hair for a year. I'm glad I did because it helped me get to know my hair. However, I was always overlapping or under-processing or over-processing. The final straw came when I burned a nickle-sized patch of hair from the back of my head--with a freakin' phyto-relaxer (seriously who burns with a phyto). That was the last time I did my own relaxer.

I think the key is to find a better stylist not play hit or miss with your hair.

 

[brucebettye]

I say go ahead and cut out your stylist. I have done a virgin relaxer on my hair and two touchups since I have gone texlaxed. My hair has grown from a twa to a little past shoulder length in 2 years and it is the healthest it has been in a long time. I have no problem with overlapping because I apply hair grease on my previously relaxed hair and I add condition to my relaxer so it slows down the chemical process and gives me time to apply it. I do feel that anyone can do their own relaxer if they take out the time and be patient.

 

[Aggie]

I pretty much do my hair myself now except for my trims. I do my own relaxers but I don't trust myself to give my hair a proper trim. I even ordered some DVDs from Braids By Breslin to learn to do my own braids. Please understand I am terrible at plaiting my hair but I am willing to really learn the skill now to save me some more money. My niece is so gracious and kind to do my sew-ins for me for free and I do her nails for free. She incidently can braid but hates doing them, hence the reason why I want to learn to do my own.