I'm not getting married, having sex, or dating ever again in life.

PinkyPromise

PinkyPromise

Well-Known Member
I just broke up with my bf supposed to be fiancé for good this time. I am fing done with men and relationships period. I'm through. I cant do it anymore. I invested too much of myself into this boy and all he is, is a selfish, pretentious jerk. Sneaking this n*gga into my house for over a year, being there for him when they locked him up for his tickets, letting him drive my car, giving him money just because. I'm done. Believe me when I say that. Fck these nggas all of them are the same and if they aren't then I need PROOF. No man is capable of loyalty. If you think yours is, he isn't he just isn't messy.

I know I probably sound like a troll but I'm not and I'm sorry I'm just upset as fck. This fool had the nerve this morning to text and say that he loves me. No the fck you don't. Love doesn't lie love doesn't cause pain love is respectful love tells the truth. Ngga doesn't want me and he never took me serious in the first place. Fck it.
 
AnjelLuvsUBabe said:
Give it time girl... give it time...
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Exactly. Take the time you need to heal otherwise you will just end up getting deeper and deeper into the abyss known as emotional unavailability. Meaning you have experienced so much hurt in your previous relationship you start to guard your heart which causes you to lose out on true love that you can very well have in your future. Nothing wrong with taking a step back and learning and healing from this situation before you try jumping into a brand new relationship.


Believe me sis I have been there where you are. Time is really your best friend.
 
PinkyPromise said:
I just broke up with my bf supposed to be fiancé for good this time. I am fing done with men and relationships period. I'm through. I cant do it anymore. I invested too much of myself into this boy and all he is, is a selfish, pretentious jerk. Sneaking this n*gga into my house for over a year, being there for him when they locked him up for his tickets, letting him drive my car, giving him money just because. I'm done. Believe me when I say that. Fck these nggas all of them are the same and if they aren't then I need PROOF. No man is capable of loyalty. If you think yours is, he isn't he just isn't messy.

I know I probably sound like a troll but I'm not and I'm sorry I'm just upset as fck. This fool had the nerve this morning to text and say that he loves me. No the fck you don't. Love doesn't lie love doesn't cause pain love is respectful love tells the truth. Ngga doesn't want me and he never took me serious in the first place. Fck it.
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Chalk this one up as a lesson learned. Not just about men, but about yourself and your boundaries. (and yeah, it did seem trollish at first, not gonna lie).
 
PinkyPromise said:
I just broke up with my bf supposed to be fiancé for good this time. I am fing done with men and relationships period. I'm through. I cant do it anymore. I invested too much of myself into this boy and all he is, is a selfish, pretentious jerk. Sneaking this n*gga into my house for over a year, being there for him when they locked him up for his tickets, letting him drive my car, giving him money just because. I'm done. Believe me when I say that. Fck these nggas all of them are the same and if they aren't then I need PROOF. No man is capable of loyalty. If you think yours is, he isn't he just isn't messy.

I know I probably sound like a troll but I'm not and I'm sorry I'm just upset as fck. This fool had the nerve this morning to text and say that he loves me. No the fck you don't. Love doesn't lie love doesn't cause pain love is respectful love tells the truth. Ngga doesn't want me and he never took me serious in the first place. Fck it.
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I know you're going through right now...I understand where you're coming from, but don't write off dating and marriage completely. Just because he didn't work out for you dosen't mean there isn't a man out there for you.


Just take this time to work on you....count this experience as a lesson learned and move on!

As for the bolded...don't ever, ever, EVER do that again :spank:
 
treybaby2005 said:
Is this really serious?I can't.

Sent from my ADR6300 using ADR6300
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Huh? You can't what?

OP you will love again. Take time to cry. Then breath. Take everything in and know this experience was a part of your growth. In your meantime take time for you. Love you. You are so young, chica, all of these feelings will pass and you will be able to love again!

sent from HTC EVO
 
Sorry OP.

Guys can be such such d**ks. You should take some time out for yourself to recouperate and learn not to date ninjas that go in and out of jail, need to drive YOUR car, and need your money in order to get by.
When you're ready one day and have taken the time out to pamper yourself mentally/emotionally, stop messing with NUCCAS and get yourself a BLACK MAN . Big big difference.
 
VelvetRain said:
Exactly. Take the time you need to heal otherwise you will just end up getting deeper and deeper into the abyss known as emotional unavailability. Meaning you have experienced so much hurt in your previous relationship you start to guard your heart which causes you to lose out on true love that you can very well have in your future. Nothing wrong with taking a step back and learning and healing from this situation before you try jumping into a brand new relationship.


Believe me sis I have been there where you are. Time is really your best friend.
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I don't want love anymore. True or not. I'm good. This bullshti has happened too many times I gave love too many chances then here comes this fool and here we are lonely and broken all over again.
 
I don't mean to be harsh but when you put all your eggs into a basket with no bottom, you can't say that's just how baskets are. He obviously wasn't a good guy. You're only 21 and although you feel betrayed, mad, upset etc, you will get through this. Breakups suck, that's just the nature of it, time really does heal- if you have a positive attitude, otherwise it will make you more bitter. Try to invest more in you now- learn from what was, deal with what is and be better for what will be xx
 
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OP, you are only 21. Much too young to have been put through the wringer "so many times" with men that you are fed up. Much too young to know "what all men are like". Much too young to have invested so much of yourself in any man. Much too young to give up on men and relationships.

I recall from another thread you gave some clues so posters started asking probing questions about your relationship, and you basically told them to back off, you were doing you. Chalk it up to a lesson learnt.
 
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PinkyPromise said:
I don't want love anymore. True or not. I'm good. This bullshti has happened too many times I gave love too many chances then here comes this fool and here we are lonely and broken all over again.
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Ask yourself why are you attracting these guys?
 
I am sorry this happened to you. Big Hug. I have been there done, done that, been done too. Got the t-shirt and wrote the book.

You will be fine. You will love again. TRUE Love is ALWAYS worth the risk. This unfortunately was not true love my dear.

Truth hurts...

It goes a little deeper than loving self from your OP. You loved him and you had no personal boundaries what so ever.

Sneaking this n*gga into my house for over a year, being there for him when they locked him up for his tickets, letting him drive my car, giving him money just because.
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The relationship was imbalanced. You loved him by giving him everything you thought he wanted and in turn he probably lost respect for you. A man that doesn't respect will walk all over you, lie to you, tell you he love you, then do it to you again.

Next time, all of the above should not be happening plus more. And ONLY deal with men whose actions are in alignment with his words. But most importantly, next time, make sure you're not giving with regret.
 
Damn OP I'm sorry girl :( :(

F*** his sorry a** !! Playin with peoples emotions like that :nono:

You'll get over him someday. Don't think all men are this way. Although I lmao'd at 'if you think yours is diff, he's not'. Some guy will prove you wrong one day.

You got any of his stuff? If so, take that **** and burn it. I mean lil stuff that he's forgot about..like a pen, pics, hats, beaters, toothbrushes. (That may not be the best advice...)

You like white boys? No? Good. Go find yourself a cute white boy and play with him for a lil while (that may not be the best advice either). AFTER you've burned the sorry niccas **** :yep:

Don't be a fool no more and let people drive your car, give money to them, etc girrrrrrrrrrl :nono: that is some fool.ish.ness! Even more foolish than my advice probably is!

I'm sure the other ladies will offer some more sensible advice.

:bighug: I hope you feel better!

Sent from my WX445 using WX445
 
PinkyPromise said:
I invested too much of myself into this boy and all he is, is a selfish, pretentious jerk. Sneaking this n*gga into my house for over a year, being there for him when they locked him up for his tickets, letting him drive my car, giving him money just because.
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See this is where you went wrong....


I hope you can learn from this.
 
Ok. First off I am not going to say anything about your age! I was in a physically abusive relationship when I was 14-15. Very abusive. Was molested for years and am just now talking about it. So there are things - LOTS OF THINGS - that you can go through by age 21.

I have been where you are. Love does exist. God is love. My thing is this - take some time for you! There is this movement called "No Cuffin'" and yes I am serious. There are different ways to go about the movement. I am in it and have been in it for over 2 years. I have male friends. I go on dates - but I don't date. I am dating MY SELF. Finding out what makes ME happy without a man. The only men in my life right now are my two sons! They come #1 even before my HAIR (LOL). I am emotionally unavailable RIGHT NOW but I know that one day I will have to put those cuffs back on. I am going to give myself a few more years...there are still scars that havent healed and I dont think I nore whatever man comes along is ready to deal with a broken heart.

I said all that to say this...time and prayer. That's what you need. FORGET men right now. Focus on YOU YOU YOU YOU YOU. Be selfish.
 
A lot of us have given the, "fuk dem ninja's" speech. Time heals all wounds, just don't stew in this for too long or you will end a very bitter woman. Scream, holla, get all snotty mad, then pray on it a rebuild.
 
Melody.Monroe said:
Ok. First off I am not going to say anything about your age! I was in a physically abusive relationship when I was 14-15. Very abusive. Was molested for years and am just now talking about it. So there are things - LOTS OF THINGS - that you can go through by age 21.

I have been where you are. Love does exist. God is love. My thing is this - take some time for you! There is this movement called "No Cuffin'" and yes I am serious. There are different ways to go about the movement. I am in it and have been in it for over 2 years. I have male friends. I go on dates - but I don't date. I am dating MY SELF. Finding out what makes ME happy without a man. The only men in my life right now are my two sons! They come #1 even before my HAIR (LOL). I am emotionally unavailable RIGHT NOW but I know that one day I will have to put those cuffs back on. I am going to give myself a few more years...there are still scars that havent healed and I dont think I nore whatever man comes along is ready to deal with a broken heart.

I said all that to say this...time and prayer. That's what you need. FORGET men right now. Focus on YOU YOU YOU YOU YOU. Be selfish.
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So true. There is a powerful message in your post.
Take yourself on dates, and get to know you a lot better. I go on dates too, and hang out with guys, but i'm so selfish with my heart nowadays.
 
treybaby2005 said:
Is this really serious?I can't.

Sent from my ADR6300 using ADR6300
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You can't what? Offer some kind words to a fellow woman who has obviously been hurt? :nono:

Anyway OP, we're the same age and we CAN'T give up, there is so much life ahead for us and the right dude will come around, just work on you and love you...somebody else (who deserves you) will follow suit.
 
Your past doesn't have to be your future. You got burned, but you learned a lesson. You're on the road to recovery and the first step is to take back control of your life. Bashing this guy or all men is not going to help. Take responsibility for your actions and move on to become a better woman. You got this!
 
You know what? I think I felt like this at 21 too! :yep:

I'm 23 now, and I already feel much differently. Just give it time. We've all been there at some point or the other.
 
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