If a man cheats, does he love you?

[naturalmanenyc]

^^^^She's totally wrong. Men are wired to be monogamous. There are tons of men who love their wives do not cheat & risk losing them.

I still cannot believe that so many women fall for the hype "men will be men" or "all men cheat". That is total BS. I suspect it's because their mom/dad/grandparents also fell for the hype and it's now being taught as gospel.

I know plenty of men who would never cheat on their wives....not only for love but for fear of losing their entire life over 20 minutes of sex. It's just not worth it to a lot of men. Of course, I know some cheaters too but there are definitely men who are wired for monogamy.

 

[Serenity_Peace]

^^^ I hope you are right. I want to keep hope. I want to believe!

 

[Sasha299]

A man who cheats can love his woman but he loves himself more.

In the scenario - dude loves neither woman and needs a swift kick in his rear.


Women need to stop putting up with this crap and realize if he loves himself more than he loves you then he is not worth having. The only way to stop having dis-functional families is for individuals to stop accepting less than a whole relationship. A man who has the time and energy to go out there looking for a piece of *** is a man who is not giving his whole into making his woman happy. Every time he sticks his dipstick into another car he is running the risk of giving his SO something. If he does not care SHE should before she comes up with the gift that takes her life - condoms are not 100%, they have and do burst and HIV is not the only think she has to worry about.

 

[French Rouge]

So tonight, I met with an old friend of mine who is a prostitute and she told me that it is in men's nature to cheat. Men are not wired to be monogamous and that's a very difficult thing for women to accept, she said. She has many, many married clients. They are good men, she said. In fact, most, if not all of them are married or have girlfriends. They tell her that they love their wives but simply cannot be with one woman for the rest of their lives. She said that they struggle with this, some men even cry on her shoulder and need someone to talk to. She said that they tell her that it's *not* their wives fault. Many of them don't blame their wives, they just cannot commit physically to one person. They say that they love their wives and would never leave them. And yet they simply crave something different and exciting. It has absolutely nothing to do with love.

The question for me is that if she is right and that most men can never be monogamous, is this something that women can accept? Even for those of us who wish to be married, could we accept the possibility that there's a chance that our husbands may not always remain faithful?

I think she is making excuses for why she engages in for profit activity with the married men. The same way the men are making excuses for why they can't be a mature adult in a monogamous relationship.

On another note, I hate the term 'new coochie'. Especially when a man is sleeping with a non-virgin. Only new coochie around are virgins (even that is subject to debate with some women). If he isn't tapping a brand new hymen intact cooter, the coochie is recycled. I corrected a friend on this once. Told him he should be saying "Only thing better than new coochie is recycled, reduced, and reused coochie". He laughed, but it is true.

 

[HollyGolightly]

A man who cheats can love his woman but he loves himself more.

I agree. I've never been faithful, and that's the exact reason. I was too selfish.

 

[makeupgirl]

If a man cheats, then he didn't love you to begin with. No one who loves a person, is going to outright hurt or betray them.

 

[BeautifulFlower]

I think she is making excuses for why she engages in for profit activity with the married men. The same way the men are making excuses for why they can't be a mature adult in a monogamous relationship.

On another note, I hate the term 'new coochie'. Especially when a man is sleeping with a non-virgin. Only new coochie around are virgins (even that is subject to debate with some women). If he isn't tapping a brand new hymen intact cooter, the coochie is recycled. I corrected a friend on this once. Told him he should be saying "Only thing better than new coochie is recycled, reduced, and reused coochie". He laughed, but it is true.

This is funny as h3ll.

I would agree though. Not that its the wives fault but HER clients have a probably with monogomy not men in general. Statistics talk about how much men cheat. Heck, women cheat just as much. H3LL, people cheat. And its always for (IMO) for one reason, you're selfish. Those men arent crying because they're cheating, they're crying because they have much deeper issues that goes far beyond their pen1ses and using their pen1ses is a means of clouding their pain.

I dont buy the hype.

 

[gabulldawg]

^^^ I hope you are right. I want to keep hope. I want to believe!

I know that's your friend, but why would you believe what a prostitute has to say about men? Do you really think that she's in good company? The fact that these men are using prostitutes makes them no-good IMO. There's no such thing as a good man who enjoys the company of prostitutes.

I do not believe that all men cheat and I never will. I also do not and will not believe that men aren't wired to be monogamous. Both men and women cheat. We both have needs. If I can control myself and be faithful to one man, then a man can control himself and be faithful to one woman.

 

[Tylove101]

Yep you are right! That's it.... SELFISH!!!!! The guys/chicks that I've known that cheated probably couldn't define the word SELFLESS!

Selfish people cheat.

 

[Kerryann]

If you love me why cheat on me that doesnt make sense and if i forgive you you surely will do it again i guess that would be love too again huh

 

[godsflowerrr]

ITA! Love is definitely an action word. My dad always told me to not focus on what a man says..."put him on mute" and focus on his actions ALONE. If they don't match he doesn't love you and is just talking smack..lol

Love is a verb.
Love is NOT a feeling.
With that, if you LOVE me (by way of action) then you wouldnt cheat on me.

 

[sky_blu]

He may think he loves you but he sure doesn't respect you. Not enough to not cheat.

 

[julzinha]

That is not LOVE in the least! and I'm only 18 and I know I would never deal with that crap!! A man like that likes having options and is afraid to commit to either and no woman deserves to be strung along like that both need to leave him and he needs to get his act together! and it saddens me that women are the ones that go through this! it is one of the worst kinds of settling!

 

[LongiLox]

The answer is: NO.

 

[Ladybelle]

if a woman cheats, does she love her man?

Infidelity along with any other slip up doesn't neccessarily rule out love. It depends on the situation and I cannot say that one "yes" or "no" answer fits every situation.

There is a difference between a serial cheater & the guy who messes up once and is truly remorseful. Any woman in a situation such as this should take all the information into consideration before making a decision about whether to leave or stay.

So, I think it is possible for a man to love his spouse even if he has cheated. I also think the reverse can be true. I can't pin this as black/white because there can be some shades of grey.

 

[Lucie]

I can't say cheating is the most loving thing to do in a relationship but it is not always so black or white. A man can cheat on his wife/girlfriend and still love her. Mens emotions are different than women. Many can cheat on their wife and have no love for the person he is cheating on her with, only looking to satisfy a temporary urge. Does it make it right? No. But it is, what it is.

As long as there is more than ONE person in a relationship, one if not both of the partner's will be flawed. While cheating is one of the most horrible things a person can experience, you have to look at the overall picture. ITA with you Superwoman.

 

[Princess4real]

I know that's your friend, but why would you believe what a prostitute has to say about men? Do you really think that she's in good company? The fact that these men are using prostitutes makes them no-good IMO. There's no such thing as a good man who enjoys the company of prostitutes.

I do not believe that all men cheat and I never will. I also do not and will not believe that men aren't wired to be monogamous. Both men and women cheat. We both have needs. If I can control myself and be faithful to one man, then a man can control himself and be faithful to one woman.

I love this board and agree with you.