I think I may give up and chop it all off....

[MaryJane3000]

Yesterday I went to the salon to get my hair done and let me tell you, i was sure that my hair stylist would give me good remarks about the condition of my hair. Ive been keeping my hair in protective and low maintence styling and my protien moisture levels are in check. And it's grown a heck of a lot...ps...stretching relaxers isnt for me....Unfortunately she seemed to forget that i had breakage on the left side of my head and because I came in with a ponytail she attributed all of my damage to wearing a ponytail. Saying the brushing it up and and twisting it up has caused damage on my hair. I told her I stopped going to hair dressers where I went to school because they just broke my hair off and shes saying that I need to get it done and that doing the treatments and stuff at home isnt the same. Then she said my ends are thin and she wanted to chop a good 3 or four inches off my hair to where the breakage was even though she just gave me a trim in june. I told her not to and she was like she can see through my hair and I said to her well, thats because on that side theres breakage. I wanted her to dust my ends but she said no, itd be pointless if i didnt chop it. I feel ike I'm finally on my way to armpit length but I dont want raggedy ends. And at the same time i feel like most of what she was saying was bs. Yes my hair on my left side looks thinner, but the hair on my right looks fine. I look at my ends everytime I do my hair and it seems fine to me. And isn't wrapping you hair nightly the same as putting it in a ponytail when brushing is involved? I feel like shes always told me that my hair thins at the ends and no matter what I do, it doesnt change. So should I just figure thats what Im destines to have, thin ends? Or should I chop it and try and start all over, I'd rather gradually chop my ends off as my hair grows but if all that does is make it get thinner and thinner as time goes on then whats the point? I'm about to pull an Amber Rose y'all. Does anybody have any advice or words of encouragement?

 

[Charz]

I think that maybe you should find another stylist, one that works with you and not against you.

Please do not cut all your hair off. Your damaged side will catch up to your other side and you can dust as you go.

 

[MaryJane3000]

thanks charzboss, once i wash my hair I'm going to take pics and post so you ladies can see what I'm talking about. She even tried to tell me my hair wasn't fine, when I remember her telling me when I was younger that I had fine hair. My hairs never really grown past shoulder length and ive been seeing her since I was a little girl. She always said I had thin ends. :/

 

[Ronnieaj]

Co-signing with Charzboss. Your stylist doesn't sound like she's working in your best interest. What she said honestly sounds like a bunch of hooey. What do you mean it's not the same doing treatments at home versus in a salon?!?!?! She lost me right there, especially since I've had treatments done in my beautician's home before... If she trimmed you in June, why would she need to cut 3 inches 3 months later? If that's the case, someone didn't do her job well. If you've had breakage that's growing in, sure the ends aren't going to be even, but that doesn't mean you're doing something wrong. That's what happens when the hair breaks.

I say let her go. Find someone who's willing to work with you, not against you, and help you achieve your goals.

 

[lilanie]

JMJ - don't do it!

I have impulsively cut my hair due to real or imagined damage and regret doesnt even scratch the surface of my sentiments...

I am agreeing with all the other responders - do what you can to save what you can and leave the rest...

 

[BostonMaria]

Don't do it!
I agree with the other two ladies, if you had that much damage I'm sure she would've been able to fix it back in June. I also have to disagree with the comment about going to a salon vs being a DIY'er. My hair has thrived since doing everything on my own.

 

[tetbelle]

I say do what's best for you. You can definately continue where you are and remedy some of the damage or you can do a big chop as long as it sits well with you. I actually did a big chop yesterday and I'm really happy about it.

 

[beans4reezy]

JusMarie,
I completely agree with the other ladies.. ditch her. I posted a the same kind of thread last year, about my hairdresser who made it seem like my hair was the worse and that everything I was doing to it was: "Eh, whatever..." She was the same one to later eat her words, talking about..."your hair is strong." Do not cut your hair, keep doing what you are doing and MAKE her eat her words in time.

 

[Foxglove]

This is why I stopped going to stylists
Stop arguing with me just do my hair and let me go lol
I hate how saying no isn't enough you have to argue and argue just to keep the scissors and chemicals away from your head

 

[wheezy807]

Co signing with the ladies- find a new stylist STAT! She's full of it!

 

[JayAnn0513]

Whatever you decide to do re: chopping or dusting, get a new stylist. Some of the things she has said to you just don't make sense to me. Good luck!

 

[doll-baby]

I think that your stylist is giving you the bait and hook that most stylists feed their clients. "oh your hair is damaged we need to start fresh and cut 3 or more inches". This is exactly what happen to me the last time I went to the salon, I had been in micro braids and gained significant length (from ear to shoulder length). I had two stylists gang up on me saying my hair was damaged I need it cut into a style, they made me feel so bad about my hair that I gave in and let them cut my hair . By the time she finished My hair was back at ear length after a year and a half of growing it out. From then on I swore that I would never go to another salon. I also had to control myself because I was scissor happy as well in the sense that if my hair was growing uneven I would cut it to the shortest part, that is one of the reason's why it took so long for my hair to grow.

I would say to you just keep taking care of your hair and don't cut it I have thin ends as well but I have managed to thicken them by using protective styles, cassia henna, and keeping them moist and sealed with shea butter and coconut oil. I have been caring for my hair without stylists and I am approaching BSL. HTH stay encouraged.

 

[mscocoface]

You do you boo!

Don't drink the koolaid!!!!

Keep doing what you are doing and if you can help it, don't go to another stylist. Your hair is thriving it is on the road to being healthy and strong. The stylist doesn't know she does not live with you and your hair 24/7.

I commend you for standing strong and NOT letting her cut your hair.

 

[jerseygurl]

Do not go back to that hair stylist!!! She should have been able to address the issues with your hair in your prior visit, now she wants to cut your hair some more smh. Methinks she does not know how to deal with short hair so she wants to cut it and "style" it her way.

For far too long, women have bought into that hype about hair stylists knowing better than us but with LHCF we are bursting that hype left and right.

Just do what makes you happy.

 

[dachsies_rule!]

Please don't chop off your hair 'cause of that crazy chick! She sounds like she's trying to sabotage your hair growth...cut off 3 inches!?! You shoulda told her: "Yeah, i'll cut 3 off mine if you cut 3 off yours"...she must be crazy!
Just continue to grow your hair and dust it as it gets longer and your ends will even out. Then you can go back just to swing your long, healthy, thick-a$$ hair all up in her face.

 

[MaryJane3000]

lol thanks ladies, i really appreciate your words of encouragement and humor ("Yeah, i'll cut 3 off mine if you cut 3 off yours"...she must be crazy!"). I think you all are right. My hair has never felt this healthy and everyone is telling me how good and healthy it looks and most people dont even notice the breakage on my left side. My siggy pic is my hair after the trim, and you can barely notice the breakage. My boss today even told me that she was crazy for wanting to cut it, because you cant even notice it. But ill ost picture of it while its wet and show you ladies the damaged areas.

 

[vainღ♥♡jane]

i don't see how doing treatments at home is not the same if you're finding products that work for you. imo the only difference is you bein $75 poorer with 3 inches less of hair lol. i think you should keep tryin to grow out your damaged side, and find a stylist that knows about HAIR CARE, that will help you through your journey.​

 

[SmartyPants]

I think that your stylist is giving you the bait and hook that most stylists feed their clients. "oh your hair is damaged we need to start fresh and cut 3 or more inches". This is exactly what happen to me the last time I went to the salon, I had been in micro braids and gained significant length (from ear to shoulder length). I had two stylists gang up on me saying my hair was damaged I need it cut into a style, they made me feel so bad about my hair that I gave in and let them cut my hair . By the time she finished My hair was back at ear length after a year and a half of growing it out. From then on I swore that I would never go to another salon. I also had to control myself because I was scissor happy as well in the sense that if my hair was growing uneven I would cut it to the shortest part, that is one of the reason's why it took so long for my hair to grow.

I would say to you just keep taking care of your hair and don't cut it I have thin ends as well but I have managed to thicken them by using protective styles, cassia henna, and keeping them moist and sealed with shea butter and coconut oil. I have been caring for my hair without stylists and I am approaching BSL. HTH stay encouraged.

I agree with this. This is one of the reasons I am doing protective styling with phony buns. I get to let my hair grow out without me having to look at those uneven ends. As long as your ends aren't split just leave them alone and let them grow.

The upside to the phony buns is that my new job requires me to interact with the public. Everyone is telling my how professional the buns look! I even had my friend's seven-year old daughter tell me she likes my new hairstyle in church one Sunday (and ya'll know little kids are brutally honest) !