I quit!

Why I quit transitioining...


  • Total voters
    38

beyondcute

New Member
I dont wanna transition anymore. I cant take it. My hair is too thick... Its too nappy... Its not the texture I want it to be... Its not uniform... Its just UGH!












SIKE! Not after all this time, I wouldnt quit now
but I was wondering for all those who started to transition and quit, why? This would include anyone who ever tried it. If you BC-ed ahead of schedule, etc.

EDITED: to make the parts bold cuz yall seem to be over looking that... :lol: :lachen:
 
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LMAO!! I was reading like and was thinking 'awwww :( '...then i kept reading :lachen: I think I wanna transition too. It's been only 4 weeks since my last relaxer and I don't think I'm gonna get another one but we'll see.
 
i tried to transition before and caved to peer pressure and thefact i wan't mentally ready to transition. I decided to transition again in may after stretching a relaxer for 3 months. I hopped off my hair in june because i was just impatient . didn't want to deal with 2 textures and was ready to see my natual hair .
 
I had a plan to transition for 18 months, but I chopped at 14 months. The reason I did the BC early was because I was starting to get concerned about the health of my hair. I had to constantly be moisturizing and worrying over the line of demarcation. After I chopped, it was like most of my hair problems went away. I was happy, but I was like this: :eek: over how much hair I chopped off!
 
All transitioners go through the "i want to quit blues". I went through it myself. I had to revisit why I chose to go natural in the first place. Change can be hard to except. I think folks jump in with their eyes closed without really think about all the stuff that goes into becoming natural.
 
beyondcute said:
I just pissed someone off... 1 star already? :lol

hahahaha....you can not be serious!!! Childish...

Don't feel bad...I think people that start to transition go back and forth for awhile. If it is really what you want, you will find a way.:)

EDIT: ok..hahahaha...I didn't realize you were pulling our leg...keep up the good work!
 
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I never wanted to quit transitioning.... I just felt like I was in an impossible place because I couldn't go back to where I wanted to escape from (20-plus years of relaxing) and I didn't know what the future looked like (as a natural).... I just wanted to opt out of everything (see, it is more than "just hair"). It helped to be around folks who had experienced the transitioning journey and had survived the roadblocks.... That's why it's was important (for me) to NOT see all the pretty relaxed hair (not trying to go there and hijack this thread).

Anyhow, my planned 18-month transition ended at 10 months. I'm starting not to remember what I looked like w/relaxed hair.... Wow.... it's deep....

Corny but relevant quote: quitters never win, and winners never quit.

Peace out!
 
I quit because once I started shedding it really discourages me cause I'm not trying to do the BC. And my goal is to be bra strap one day and i'm closer to it being relaxed. I don't wanna start over from scratch. I've seen others do it but that's just not me. I have very thick 4a hair and I love seeign my new growth when I'm stretching. But it was thick when I was a kid and natural and its thick relaxed. My hair is healthy too so I'll probably continue to relax every 3 months. I really wanted to be natural but I was punk. :lol: As soon as I start shedding its back to the creamy crack for me. Oh well.:ohwell:

So I quit cause I need the little bit of length I have. :ohwell:
 
Well, I know that I'm going to go natural at some point in my life because I love my natural kinks and coils, but I'm just too self conscious right now.
 
I think my heart stopped when I read the beginning of your post.

Girl you scared the crap out of me. Don't do that again. LOL

Good topic though!
 
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nope. if i ever transition i'd go back to relaxing cause i love the convenience of straight hair. i love my curly hair too but i like having options.
 
Honestly, I quit because I found this board! I was transitioning and came here and saw that I could have healthy, long relaxed hair. I figured, I can go natural anytime I want, so I'll give this one more shot. And here I am at BSL!

However, after attempting to trans., I saw that it's not for me, so when I do go natural, I will be B'C-ing.
 
Beyondcute, that was sooooo mean! I was just getting ready to get upset! Good way to jump start my Monday, though.

And yeah, I wanted to quit just this morning for the same reasons you gave. You were just kidding but I'm not -- it ain't the texture I thought it would be and it's at a stage right now where it's really tough to deal with and I was really considering a texturizer just to get over the hump. But I'm not ready to quit yet. I'm gonna try to stick it out for at least a year and reassess then.
 
NewYorkgyrl said:
I think my heart stopped when I read the beginning of your post.

Girl you scred the crap out of me. Don't do that again. LOL

Good topic though!


Girl....you had me goin' too! I was like, "NOT BEYONDCUTE!" :p
 
For me, I LOVED the texture that I found during my 9-10 month transition. BUT, my hair is awesomely thick and the longer I transitioned, the more difficult it was to manage. I decided that for myself at this stage of my life, I want long hair more than I want natural hair.

I was planning to straighten my natural hair anyway, but I didn't want to do a BC after I had just started trying to grow it long. It was a choice of having healthy long hair sooner than later for me. Had I continued with my transition, I'd have to wait at least another whole year to get to where I was currently at relaxed. That would have been fine, but right now I'm not THAT patient. :lol:
 
lauren450 said:
Honestly, I quit because I found this board! I was transitioning and came here and saw that I could have healthy, long relaxed hair. I figured, I can go natural anytime I want, so I'll give this one more shot. And here I am at BSL!

However, after attempting to trans., I saw that it's not for me, so when I do go natural, I will be B'C-ing.

Good points Lauren! I feel the same way... the next time I decide to go natural, I'm just going to chop, chop, chop. And you're right, finding this board let me know I could have LONG healthy relaxed hair.
 
I fooled some of yall :lol: Okay Ima bad girl Im sorry. Seriously, I go thru my moments when Im like DANg I just wasted $20 on that blow out cuz its about to rain :lol: But then I remember that if it hadda rained on my relaxed hair I would have gotten the same results :lachen: Somedays I wish I coudl get sewins but my ahri si too thick and would blend right with the weave. But other than that Im good. My hair is CRAZY thick but shoot Im liking the journey! I cant wait till my hair grows up to be like MsMarie... In short I dont think yall have to worry about my crazy behind quitting (not that theres anythign wrong with that cuz if my hair were any thicker Id go mad!)
 
I quit transitioning the first time b/c I was ready to just be natural. I was tired of having to style my hair in ways as to hide the two different textures while I waited for my hair to grow out. I couldn't even enjoy my hair that way. Soooo, this time around, I just had my SO shave all of the relaxed hair off (wasn't much anyway). Only "issue" I had with doing this is that I'd just gotten the retouch 2 weeks prior to cutting it off. I just didn't want the headache this time.
 
I am soo glad you started this. I am 3 months post, and I haven't completely decided if I will transition or not. I will give it at least 3 more months before I make a decision. But, I want to get a touch-up all ready. I flatironed my hair to check my length because I've been wearing braid-outs and buns. And my hair is sooo poofy. Even my hair didn't get it as flat as I want it. So, that made me consider getting a relaxer again. And also the whole shrinkage thing is driving me crazy. I'm on the APL by 2007 challenge, and I don't know the actual length of my hair.

But on the flip side, I LOOOOVE my new growth. I love to see and feel the waves. I love the few spiral curls that I have. And my new growth looks so much more healthier. It shines more than my relaxed hair, and it just looks better. Soooo, hopefully I can stick through it.
 
I stopped temporarily. I wanted to give relaxing one more shot before I go natural.

"However, after attempting to trans., I saw that it's not for me, so when I do go natural, I will be B'C-ing."

I totally agree with this. B'Cing all the way!
 
Jkelly0204 said:
i tried to transition before and caved to peer pressure and thefact i wan't mentally ready to transition. I decided to transition again in may after stretching a relaxer for 3 months. I hopped off my hair in june because i was just impatient . didn't want to deal with 2 textures and was ready to see my natual hair .

True story.
 
Lately, I've had the same thoughts, because I miss wearing my hair consistently straight, without it poofing n' boofing by the end of the night. :ohwell: Hang in there girl!
 
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I wanted to quit for about an entire year. I had no idea what I had gotten myself into. I couldn't do anything with my hair but wear it up (cuz I got bold and chopped like an idiot). Almost 3 years later, I'm glad I did it, but I know it was tough.

Why didn't I quit? I really don't know. Because I didn't want to be a quitter, maybe? And largely because I wanted to see if my natural hair could be cute. Plain and simple. I had always admired folks like Tracee Ross, Leela James and Kelis (when her hair was big and curly) and wondered if I had that hair texture. I really wanted to see what it would look like with a headfull of curly hair (hoping thats what I had).

But I went to braids for 5 months straight (new cornrows every 2 weeks) because I just couldn't take not knowing what to do with my hair. Try experimenting with braids out and roller sets (depending on the texture of your hair and how much new growth you have). And if you decide to do the big chop: go get you some Curly Pudding or the Fantasia IC Gels (brown, clear or blue) stat! Don't suffer for a year like I did. :)

And low and behold, I did.

My only comment would be that transitioning doesn't have to be a permanent thing. I hate being on the boards hearing women degrade relaxed hair like its the worst thing a black woman could ever do. We need to stop thinking of our hair as this PERMANENT thing and start thinking of it as a dynamic part of who we are. I've been natural for 3 years and I'm enjoying it. Does that mean I won't one day dye it? Nah...cuz I'm thinking about some colors right now. I might one day relax it all, wear it straight for 2 years, chop it off and transition again. I DONT KNOW.

And that's the beauty of it. I can do what I want - knowing no matter what I do, it's fierce. :)
 
I actually don’t know why I stopped transitioning. I transitioned for about a year, gradually clipping away the relaxed ends. Then I went to the salon for that final Big Chop and a cute style.....and came out a few hours later with it texturized! :eek: :lol:

I’m still trying to figure out why I did it because I worked hard to grow that stuff out. Oh, well. However, I’ve vowed that once my hair is at my goal length, I will transition again for good. My texturized hair treats me just fine, but I find myself missing my unprocessed hair.
 
I know that one day I will go down this road, especially when I'm a much older lady and just give up on the relax thing much like my momma did a couple years before she passed away. She stopped frying and dying and my momma had a beautiful head of silky 3b/3c hair white as snow. I was like wow how pretty although eery seeing moms like that cause she looked old - I never saw my momma look this way.

Thanks to LHCF I do have a plan when I do go this route. I expect to braid up for @ 6 months to a year and then just big chop. I need just enough hair to pony as I notice when pulling into a pony on unrelaxed hair I get to see a pretty wave pattern almost like my moms hair. I can barely stand to stretch let alone transition. So I know transitioning is not for me.
 
beyondcute, it seems like you've been transitioning for ages! How long has it been? I applaud you for not giving up with transititioning for so long (for BC or otherwise!).
 
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