eternalsotsm
New Member
I'm just going to say this... i know that a lot of people might be upset...but just prove me wrong. Please show me the light.
I went to a christian school and i was raised DEVOUT CHRISTIAN. Like, the pure "straight up" bible. But, right now, at this moment, i don't want to be a christian anymore. I don't know what I'm feeling right now:
1. I've never been in a relationship with anyone and it bothers me so much because I'm getting ready to turn 25 in march. I feel ugly and i hate God right now.
2. My family are going through financial problems since 2001 and we pray and fast and go to church and tithe and blah blah...i'm just so SICK OF IT. I'm actually doing a fast right now (21 day Daniel fast)and i'm trying everything to hear Gods voice. I used to teach Sunday school but i just grew weary of life. I was one of those people what said i loved Jesus and God is able.
What hurts the most is how my dad works so hard and nothing seems to break for him.
The worst part is that last night, i was to the point that i was angry at God and told him that he doesn't exist...then i felt this horrible feeling come over my body...so i just cried for forgiveness. I've never felt so low in my entire life.
I don't understand why God is allowing everything to happen. I had to use my student loans to help my dad out because he's waiting on the "next job" (he's a general contractor) and now i'm living off of oatmeal and my family needs money. My loans paid the bills but next month..what's going to happen?
I don't like God anymore. We are good people. I'm not being pretentious...but we are good people! We don't sleep around, i'm saving myself for marriage, my brothers worked hard in college and they're trying to help daddie, but alas...
What should i do???
I went to a christian school and i was raised DEVOUT CHRISTIAN. Like, the pure "straight up" bible. But, right now, at this moment, i don't want to be a christian anymore. I don't know what I'm feeling right now:
1. I've never been in a relationship with anyone and it bothers me so much because I'm getting ready to turn 25 in march. I feel ugly and i hate God right now.
2. My family are going through financial problems since 2001 and we pray and fast and go to church and tithe and blah blah...i'm just so SICK OF IT. I'm actually doing a fast right now (21 day Daniel fast)and i'm trying everything to hear Gods voice. I used to teach Sunday school but i just grew weary of life. I was one of those people what said i loved Jesus and God is able.
What hurts the most is how my dad works so hard and nothing seems to break for him.
The worst part is that last night, i was to the point that i was angry at God and told him that he doesn't exist...then i felt this horrible feeling come over my body...so i just cried for forgiveness. I've never felt so low in my entire life.
I don't understand why God is allowing everything to happen. I had to use my student loans to help my dad out because he's waiting on the "next job" (he's a general contractor) and now i'm living off of oatmeal and my family needs money. My loans paid the bills but next month..what's going to happen?
I don't like God anymore. We are good people. I'm not being pretentious...but we are good people! We don't sleep around, i'm saving myself for marriage, my brothers worked hard in college and they're trying to help daddie, but alas...
What should i do???