I don't get it

Hmm... maybe he's just not that into you??



Idk, that's what the cynic in me says. I was gonna say maybe he thinks YOU'RE not interested but you gave him a clear, unmistakeable "Hit me up; I'm interested." So I think he just wants to "hook up". (just my interpretation of the details you've shared...)

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Yes I was clear about how I felt..if he's just not into me them why keep going there with me...that's what I don't understand. And if it was just about sex wouldn't he try to see me?
 
ZLUVSNEWZEE said:
Yes I was clear about how I felt..if he's just not into me them why keep going there with me...that's what I don't understand. And if it was just about sex wouldn't he try to see me?
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That's why I said IDK, guys do some really crazy/random things... I think if he was being genuine about his intentions though, he would be more proactive; especially since you clearly showed interest.

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
 
I think after this i'm not going to bother responding to his texts, something definitely is off with this whole situation
 
Leave it and him alone. Reply to his e-mails and texts if you feel like being bothered. But otherwise I'd never initiate anything and I'd quit waiting for him to ask you out. And I certainly wouldn't call him out on anything, that's doing way too much.
 
A man will make time for the things that are important to him....

This guy is stringing you along while he figures out another situation.
 
Softerlove
I do believe that a man will make time for what he wants. Ughhh, *** him if he is in fact keeping me in the wings just in case his other sitch doesn't play out. He ain't even all that to be trying to play those kinds of games...men kill me.
 
ZLUVSNEWZEE said:
So this guy that I basically grew up with and had the biggest crush on recently "found" me on Facebook. This guy disappeared about 10 years ago and i've always asked friends about him and if they've spoken to him. So anyway after getting in touch through fb and then exchanging numbers I was so happy to be Back in contact with him after so long just as friends cause we used to really kick it. We've hooked up once before and that was a drunken night that didn't really lead to anything and he stopped hanging out shortly after that.
So after texting here and there out of the blue he texts me telling me that he just Had to get something off his chest. He prefaced this big confession by saying he needed to know if I was single first cause he didn't want to mess up any special union I may have. Then he says he had a crush on me the entire time that he and I hung out and that the night we hooked up he felt I wasn't receptive to him and thought he'd messed up his chances with me. He goes on to say that he still likes me.
Fast forward to now and he's only called me once since then and he only texts maybe twice a week with just a hello. He also hasn't suggested hanging out, going on a date nothing. The other day we had a long textversation about how what if we were brought back together for some magical reason. And that we both are interested in seeing if our friendship can be more than just friendship.
so today he texts as soon as he wakes up and asks what i'm doing today, he basically says he's not doing much so I decide to forget waiting on him to suggest us meeting up and I text him if you think about me later call me so we can hang out...he has not called.
Not even to say he can't hang out. Shouldn't he at least call just to be kind, even if he had plans or can't hang out. Oh btw his response to that text was ok and that's it. Am I missing something? Can you ladies help?
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Don't try to make sense of this or rationalize. If he was really interested you would not have had to suggest meeting up...and then he has a luke warm response? Do not even entertain this fool.
 
Is he shy, reserved, do things on his own time etc.? Or maybe he has something else going on: baby momma drama, married, engulfed in school etc.

You put yourself out there so it's not as though there is a question on whether you're interested or not. If he comes then great, if not then you won't want a lukewarm guy in your life anyway.
 
Zuleika said:
OP, you have too much on your plate to be worrying about whether or not a man is into you and to be hooking up with these men all willy nilly.

This is the time to focus on your toddler and the baby on the way. If a man is into you, you won't even have to ask people what they think he's doing. You'll know, because he'll show you.
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You have a baby on the way OP? Chile, sit down, focus and conserve your energy.
 
ZLUVSNEWZEE said:
I think after this i'm not going to bother responding to his texts, something definitely is off with this whole situation
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if it's gotten to this point, why not get down to the nitty gritty and ask him?

When I have nothing to lose, I like to lay it out on the table and force and answer from people....

Ask him point blank what his motives were for contacting you, and when you get a satisfactory answer, wish him a blessed life and move on.
 
^ I'm like this too. If I'm not emotionally attached, I will call you out! And then KIM. It's much easier to do the right thing when you are fancy free lol
I say let him have it and walk cuz it doesn't seem like he's serious.

My boy is going through the same thing. They reconnected through FB and made plans to visit etc and the girl totally hasn't responded after flirting heavily! Poor man got his hopes up. It was all about the chase for her, the romance, the fantasy. So when he stepped up and said yo, I'm coming to visit...crickets, crickets...I want to punch her in the mouth, he's a good dude!
 
Because a person has a crush on you regardless to how long they've had it, doesn't mean that they don't have some one else. He's most likely ina situation, and its simply "Bad Timing", is all.

The term, "If you can't have the one you want, love the one your with", makes a whole lotta sense. :yep:
 
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yardyspice said:
Aren't you pregnant OP? Maybe he's thinking that you are not emotionally available for a relationship.
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Zuleika said:
OP, you have too much on your plate to be worrying about whether or not a man is into you and to be hooking up with these men all willy nilly.

This is the time to focus on your toddler and the baby on the way. If a man is into you, you won't even have to ask people what they think he's doing. You'll know, because he'll show you.
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allmundjoi said:
You have a baby on the way OP? Chile, sit down, focus and conserve your energy.
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meesch said:
arent you pregnant right now? imo this sooooo shouldnt be on your radar at all...
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vevster said:
Laws have mercy she wants to date while pregnant with another man's baby? :dead:
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Agreed. (10 char)
 
Thank you, yes I am Pregnant and Thank you all for providing your opinions on how you feel about that...forgot where I was posting. I so want to be offended but I won't be but don't worry ladies my mind is focused. This is something that i've been thinking about and wanted to get an outside view...that doesn't mean that my energy or focus is in the wrong place. I had no plans to casually hook up or whatever, he's am old friend that momentarily made me feel special and I thought what if this man is meant to be in my life.
i'm not out looking to date while pregnant, this guy just came along and made me think a little.
 
ZLUVSNEWZEE said:
Thank you, yes I am Pregnant and Thank you all for providing your opinions on how you feel about that...forgot where I was posting. I so want to be offended but I won't be but don't worry ladies my mind is focused. This is something that i've been thinking about and wanted to get an outside view...that doesn't mean that my energy or focus is in the wrong place. I had no plans to casually hook up or whatever, he's am old friend that momentarily made me feel special and I thought what if this man is meant to be in my life.
i'm not out looking to date while pregnant, this guy just came along and made me think a little.
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But I don't get it. You are just a few months pregnant and a few months out of a relationship so any remaining energy you have left should be for your child and your child-to-be. Seriously.
 
If you gotta play Inspector Gadget to figure out what someone's intentions are, it's probably not worth it. He may have someone else or he might just be flaky. In either case, it sounds like a headache that you definitely don't need.
 
Yeah. Focus on that baby. What if you guys do hook up and leaves and breaks your heart. You and that baby don't need any stress at this time.
 
pookaloo83 said:
Yeah. Focus on that baby. What if you guys do hook up and leaves and breaks your heart. You and that baby don't need any stress at this time.
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She's pregnant so she shouldn't be hooking up with anyone -- emotionally or physically :nono:

We are just concerned is all. You put yourself in an untenable situation -- he either was going to freak out because you are pregnant or he could have wanted to be with you. Both are not good for you right now.
 
OP think about it. If you were a guy would you want to start a relationship with a woman who was:
1. Fresh out of a long-term relationship
2. Had a young child to care for
3. & pregnant with another man's child?
Now he may just be a jerk and a flirt, but you got a lot going on & most decent guys would be weary of getting involved in this situation. No one is saying you don't deserve love, but from the outside looking in it looks like you already have enough to deal with. We all want you and your children to be safe, happy and whole. I know you think we are being mean and picking on you but honestly OP why do you think people bother to post and give their advice? Sure, some people are just plain mean but MOST people on here and posting in this thread genuinely care about you and your future. It's sad that you always end up hurt and/or pissed off when so many people are just trying to give you the help you asked for.
 
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