I can't take this anymore!

[StarScream35]

I'm so pissed. People say don't give up on finding Mr.Right or don't give up on love but it's these situations that make you wanna walk away from dating and never look back.

So this answers my profile and I could tell he had actually read my profile because he injected a few things about it in his email. I was pleased so I answered back. He responded with a nice long email and actually asked me a few questions. I thought dang........about time! Finally a guy who knows how to communicate and keep the convo going, something incredibly hard to find when you are online dating. Okay so we email back and forth for a few days and he asks me out for Friday. I accept and all is good. Come Thursday, he claims he forgot he has to pick up a relative from the airport so wants to reschedule to Monday. I'm like okay but how the hayle you forget you have to pick up a relative from the airport! Anyway, so here is today and I get an email from him saying he has to cancel our date cause he is sick. He went on and on about how he hopes I don't think he's playing games blah blah.

I'm done. I refuse to answer his email and blocked him from seeing me online. I can't believe grown men play these stupid games. I'm just so pissed because these are the types of men I attract yet I try to avoid. I'm just so tired of all this mess.

 

[ladylibra_30]

Breathe.

Look at the bright side - You wasted nothing but a few key-strokes. Keep hope alive.

PS - Sometimes things REALLY do happen in life.

 

[LivingInPeace]

So what if he's telling the truth?

 

[pre_medicalrulz]

Girl I feel your pain. This is just a simple chapter out of my book of life. SMH

 

[naturalmanenyc]

He might be telling the truth. There is a flu going around. DH had it as did a few family members and neighbors. It's even been on the news.

 

[faithVA]

He could be playing games but it is flu season he could be sick. Have you spoken on the phone yet or just by email. I think you should talk on the phone before having a date. That may help ease your mind or at least give you more of a definitive answer if you want to pursue something.

I think these set of circumstances aren't enough to state that he is playing games.

 

[StarScream35]

I would love to believe he is telling the truth but my experience and gut feeling tells me otherwise. How can you forget you have to pick up a relative from the airport?? That's a big deal but you forgot. Also, when people are guilty of something, they reveal their guilt without even realizing it. He went on and on about how he hopes I don't think he is playing games and that he is sincere. If you are sincere, why do you have to say all that?? My gut tells me if I give him one more chance, it will be the same ish so I'm just done.

 

[RoseTintedCheeks]

Did a phone call actually take place or was this all through emails?

I think you overreacted being that you have never actually met before.

 

[StarScream35]

He could be playing games but it is flu season he could be sick. Have you spoken on the phone yet or just by email. I think you should talk on the phone before having a date. That may help ease your mind or at least give you more of a definitive answer if you want to pursue something.

I think these set of circumstances aren't enough to state that he is playing games.

That's another thing. He has never asked for my phone number. Even in his little I'm sorry email, he gave me his personal email address vs his phone number.

 

[StarScream35]

Did a phone call actually take place or was this all through emails?

I think you overreacted being that you have never actually met before.

No phone call. He has yet to ask me for mine and yet to offer his.

 

[faithVA]

If you are done then you are done.

But yeah a man can forget to pick up someone from the airport. Especially if he isn't the one that invited.My ex, um yeah, I pretty much would have to remind him of what he was supposed to do every day.

We have all been where you have been. From experience I would say its all circumstantial.
But you don't need any reason to not go out with him. Just your decision is enough.

 

[faithVA]

That's another thing. He has never asked for my phone number. Even in his little I'm sorry email, he gave me his personal email address vs his phone number.

Then yeah, move on. I don't think you should go on a date with someone you haven't had a long conversation with.

 

[Keen]

That's another thing. He has never asked for my phone number. Even in his little I'm sorry email, he gave me his personal email address vs his phone number.

Oh... I was about to join #team he may be telling the truth. You never asked him for his phone number? Does he has yours?

 

[StarScream35]

Oh... I was about to join #team he may be telling the truth. You never asked him for his phone number? Does he has yours?

I never asked and I won't volunteer mine. I've stopped asking guys for their numbers and volunteering mine.

 

[sistatv]

I was going to say go #teamfreemeal #teamtheowneroftherestauranthetakesyoutocouldbethemanofyourdreams

BUT if your guts tells you hell naw... Then Hell NAW.... Follow your gut you know all the details of your interactions so you know what is really going on... Sit and be still and if your heart and gut tells you its a no... Its a no....

 

[BostonMaria]

OP trust your instincts. I bet he's married or something.

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF

 

[C@ssandr@]

Who schedules date via email? that's a red flag for me. Especially if he didn't ask for yourn #.

 

[LifeafterLHCF]

Move on. If you gave him a shot you wouldn't be the nicest person because you feel slighted. He isn't about that single life.

 

[GeorginaSparks]

That's another thing. He has never asked for my phone number. Even in his little I'm sorry email, he gave me his personal email address vs his phone number.

No phone call. He has yet to ask me for mine and yet to offer his.

so he didnt offer to talk on the phone and all your conversations are through email and you're going to meet up with him. no girl!

 

[StarScream35]

Thanks ladies but I think I'm gonna go with my plan to get a sperm donor and become a single mom. I created a thread about this and so many ladies were encouraging me to at least give dating another try and not have a child that way. I just can't get down with the men out there playing games, acting foolish. And this is just one of many examples of foolishness I've met with. Last night I dreamed I was indeed giving birth to a beautiful baby and no man was around and we were doing just fine. Woo hoo! Thanks guys for listening to my rant.

 

[prettynatural]

Wow, I wish you the best op

 

[0live0il]

Thanks ladies but I think I'm gonna go with my plan to get a sperm donor and become a single mom. I created a thread about this and so many ladies were encouraging me to at least give dating another try and not have a child that way. I just can't get down with the men out there playing games, acting foolish. And this is just one of many examples of foolishness I've met with. Last night I dreamed I was indeed giving birth to a beautiful baby and no man was around and we were doing just fine. Woo hoo! Thanks guys for listening to my rant.

Ah, I remember your thread.

OP, sometimes when we're so.. pushed/eager/ or desperate to have something, it's easy for us to lose our patience and blow things out of proportion.

First of all, ya'll didn't have each other's phone number, so that was a huge red flag. How were you going to meet at the restaurant? Were you guys going to email each other constantly? What if there was no WIFI available? Bad move.

Whatever you chase in life.. moves further away from you. Men/women can 'smell' those who really want a commitment and it scares them, even if deep down they want the same. We all search for somebody who looks like they've got their ish together. So when you come across someone who appears they're desperate for a relationship, it turns people off!

Continue to work on yourself! And if you want a baby.. go'ahead and have one. Don't apologize to anyone for what YOU want. In the meantime, relax a bit more. Plus, I would suggest being a bit more straight forward about what you want e.g. when he asked you out, you should have replied with.. I don't meet men who I haven't spoken to on the phone.. for a considerable amount because for all I know, you can be Adam lanza and contacting me from the jail library. i don't play that.

Then he'd either STEP up to your standards or not! That's the way to test men. Let them know what you expect beforehand.

Good luck with everything.

 

[Amcd]

I've forgotten that my sister was supposed to be staying with me for the weekend until she called for me to pick her up from the train station, so yeah people forget. However if your gut tells you that he is playing you, listen to your gut.

 

[StarScream35]

Ah, I remember your thread.

OP, sometimes when we're so.. pushed/eager/ or desperate to have something, it's easy for us to lose our patience and blow things out of proportion.

First of all, ya'll didn't have each other's phone number, so that was a huge red flag. How were you going to meet at the restaurant? Were you guys going to email each other constantly? What if there was no WIFI available? Bad move.

Whatever you chase in life.. moves further away from you. Men/women can 'smell' those who really want a commitment and it scares them, even if deep down they want the same. We all search for somebody who looks like they've got their ish together. So when you come across someone who appears they're desperate for a relationship, it turns people off!

Continue to work on yourself! And if you want a baby.. go'ahead and have one. Don't apologize to anyone for what YOU want. In the meantime, relax a bit more. Plus, I would suggest being a bit more straight forward about what you want e.g. when he asked you out, you should have replied with.. I don't meet men who I haven't spoken to on the phone.. for a considerable amount because for all I know, you can be Adam lanza and contacting me from the jail library. i don't play that.

Then he'd either STEP up to your standards or not! That's the way to test men. Let them know what you expect beforehand.

Good luck with everything.

Thank you for the response but I think my mind is made up. I'm just done with the whole dating thing. I think it's the quality of men out there and that's what makes the whole thing bad. The other day some guy emailed me propositioning me for sex. I fired back asking him what in my profile led him to think I was some heaux? He answered back saying he didn't mean it like that. Oh really? Then why say it?? It's a never ending battle that I'm done with. When you are too straightforward with what you want, they get scared, when you back off too much they think you are a player and not serious, so where does it end? I've heard so many different things from different women and I've also read the rules book, applied them and nothing! I personally think people who have found somebody are simply lucky. The timing was right and that's all was needed. Unfortunately, the fact remains, there are just some women who will not have men. The odds are stacked against some women no matter what. I've accepted this and moving on to motherhood.

 

[prettynatural]

Op, I understand how you feel all too well. I am in the same boat as you, looking for a marriage and want children. I wasted my youth and time on someone that ended up marrying someone else this year. It was the most painful thing ever. But since I let it go and I have moved on, I really wanted to work on my confidence and getting what I deserve in a relationship. I worked on my negative self talk and really focused on positive affirmations of myself and getting real with me. Every guy I have met told me I was single because I wanted to be and if I wanted a relationship I could. I thought they were crazy because I wanted a relationship. I finally listened and worked on me to really truly FEEL that I am worthy of it and that I can too find love and respect. Before, I wasn't really convinced and I was stuck in the negative self talk that I was not truly aware of even though I thought I WAS confident etc.

I finally decided to try on line again. I ran into the same problems, only wanting to text and wanting to meet before having a conversation. I instead of going back into the cycle and self fulfilling prophesy, I continued my positive self talk and focused on putting out positive energy and not allowing the buttholes to dampen what I know and feel I can finally have. I did meet someone special. It is a new relationship and he is not everything I desire but he treats me well and respectful. I don't know where this relationship will go but one thing that I learned and what I have heard before, relationship will not make you happy or fill a void. I enjoy him but I am learning to enjoy myself more. I am saying all of this to say that if you truly, truly want to have a relationship. You have to put that energy out there and when you meet someone who doesn't measure up, don't allow for it to spoil what you desire. If you want children without a partner, go ahead but if you want that relationship, it still can be yours. You have to feel and believe it with your body, mind and spirt. It will come to pass.

 

[hopeful]

No phone call. He has yet to ask me for mine and yet to offer his.

Yep, time to move on...

Then yeah, move on. I don't think you should go on a date with someone you haven't had a long conversation with.

Agreed.

Also, OP you already posted but I was just about to say forget the dating stuff and move on with creating a family like you discussed in that other thread. I think you said you were approaching 40, so yeah you've given men and dating a lot of shots. Time to move on, at least for now, and pursue something you do have control of, and something that will make you happy.