I think it has a lot to do with what you're setting your hair with too... A setting lotion/mousse with a very firm hold or too much setting lotion/mousee is going to give you crispy, hard to moisturize, breakage prone spiral sets. Motions Foaming Mousse and just a little at that, works well for me when I do a flexi-rod set. And if you put a little oil in your hair, just a few drops before you put the setting lotion/mouse in, and just a few drops after, your curls will hold and still be soft enough not to lead to breakage.
I moisturize with my flexi sets in, I rub a moisturizer in my hands and kind of pat and squeeze it into my hair rather than rubbing it over the length... if you think of how you scrunch your hair when it's wet to enhance your wave pattern, it's kind of like that.