How do you expect from a single guy when it comes to cleanliness??

[jenny87]

So this guy invites me over to his place and I say okay.

He has the biggest cat I have ever seen and his place smelled like cat, I saw some huge cobwebs, and on the way out I saw the most disgusting litter box I have ever seen. He is also a mechanic by trade and 23.

So half of my friends are saying I should stop talking to him because of the problems I had with the way his house looked. But the other 1/2 are saying "he's a single guy and he lives alone what did you expect??

Thoughts?? Should I keep talking to him, or kick him to the curb??

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[Briabiggles]

That's disgusting. I would probably cut and run. It's hard to teach someone who is messy how to be clean and you are not his mother.

Sent from my iPhone. Excuse the typos!

 

[jenny87]

Bumping.....

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[itismehmmkay]

He probably needs a maid to come there once a month. I expect it to smell relatively fresh in there. Bathroom can't smell like pee or have random stains. Use of the dishwasher. No random clothes on the floor. Really just basic stuff; I don't expect everything to be scrubbed down.

 

[FoxxyLocs]

I have stopped dating someone for that reason. I expect a single man's home to maybe be a little untidy, but not disgusting. And I expect that he would clean up before I come over. I would be grossed out, and I would be concerned about his hygiene if he keeps his house like that.

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[Fine 4s]

Messy is one thing, dirty is another. I'm lucky to have dated neat men where I've been the messy one. However, I will say there was ONE dude....whoa, it didn't last long and not because of that but yyyyyyeah, I might not do that again.

 

[melissa-bee]

I've spent time in someones house where is was untidy and needed hoovering before but I won't do it again.
If it's dirty I would leave but I would let him know why I was leaving. So if he want's me over again he will make an effort to clean it.
If it's untidy then I woud just make a joke but I might leave depending on how untidy it is.
I wouldn't expect a man to stay with me if I had crumbs around my mouth and in my hair and sleep in my eyes and to me that's similar. If his house was disgusting I would think he doesn't really like me and doesn't want to impress me.

 

[aasem]

I think naturally depending on the mans career, it would be dirty. Mechanic is a dirty job.

Like a carpenter would be a neat freak, because it's a cleaner kept jobs. Like they have to clean up.


Mechanic is also one of the most manly jobs.


When I used to do manual labor my room used to be a explosion of dirt. Then since I changed, it's just mildy unkept, like clothes and shoes on the floor.


I think generally to a extent, the job a man wants to do defines somewhat of him

 

[jenny87]

Thanks for the advice so far gals! Just to be clear, his place wasn't the grossest place I have ever seen. It was actually pretty tidy and picked up, minus the cobwebs lol. And they were only in one corner.

The worse thing to me was the cat smell. I would think that someone with a cat would know how often to change the litter, but the litter box looked like it hadn't been changed in at least a week.

Then someone else was telling me that you have to be careful (eating) with people with cats because they can go everywhere and you end up with cat hair in your food a lot.

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[hopeful]

If he was a sweet guy I would date him. I couldn't handle the smell of cat pee though. I would tell him as nicely as possible that the smell is nauseating. Is it just the litter box or has the cat been peeing around the house? He probably has no idea how strong the smell is. If he really likes you and is mature I think he would work on the smell. If he gets offended or makes no effort to get rid of the stankiness then I would drop him.

I think most men need a little help in the cleanliness department. It's the neat freak men that can really drive a woman crazy.

 

[FelaShrine]

I think naturally depending on the mans career, it would be dirty. Mechanic is a dirty job.

Like a carpenter would be a neat freak, because it's a cleaner kept jobs. Like they have to clean up.


Mechanic is also one of the most manly jobs.


When I used to do manual labor my room used to be a explosion of dirt. Then since I changed, it's just mildy unkept, like clothes and shoes on the floor.


I think generally to a extent, the job a man wants to do defines somewhat of him

Excuses. A woman's coming over, he sould have cleaned up. No if or buts about it

 

[Black Ambrosia]

If the place was tidy and it was just the cobwebs and litter box then you shouldn't dump him. Definitely tell him about the nasty smell coming from the litter box. I think its like BO. After a while people with pets stop smelling the sh!t or they smell it but don't realize how bad it is. Either way, I'd have him over to my place more than I'd go over to his place.

 

[Raspberry]

If the place was tidy and it was just the cobwebs and litter box then you shouldn't dump him. Definitely tell him about the nasty smell coming from the litter box. I think its like BO. After a while people with pets stop smelling the sh!t or they smell it but don't realize how bad it is. Either way, I'd have him over to my place more than I'd go over to his place.

True.. pets are a lot of work, especially if you don't want dog or cat smell to linger. If you don't have the time to be diligent about pet clean-up than they're not worth having IMO... my sister gave me her cat and I had to give her away for that very reason.

Bet if he didn't have a cat his house would be fine.

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

naww he couldn't even come to my house cuz i'd be afraid he'd bring the stinge with him. das just nasty. who da hell wanna be chillin ova some guy house while starring at a box of shyt. he knows his place is nasty. didn't something in his brain tell him at one point "hey man...clean da place up cuz it stinks".

i'd tell him about himself. just because he is a mechanic doesn't excuse him from keeping a clean house. if he had any type of gumption about himself, he would have made an effort to try to clean up, knowin u were comin ova. most people with dirty houses will either come outside to talk to you, or pick up da pile of garbage and shove it in another room and close da door until you leave.

not dis bama. he gotchu in da house smellin like cat shyt n hot garbage.

and see, after a while, cats will start going to the bathroom in other parts of the house because cats are essentially clean animals to begin with, so it's not that cat who is dirty, it's the owner. cats can't stand to go in a full liter box.

i've always said and i'll say it again...animals have more common sense than humans.

i hope yall wasn't phuckin amongst da funk....

 

[lux10023]

omgggggggggg thatjersey you got me howling at my officeeee...

ditto to everything you stated---

CLEANLINES IS CLEANLINESS--ESP WHEN A **** HAS PETSSSS--F0HHHH

when you have a pet you have to be extra clean... with all that owning a pet brings--mechanic or not---**** dont know how to change a liter box? you know when a liter box needs to be changedd...becuz it stinkssss

i woulda gas masked myself outta that muggg!!! lmaooo

naww he couldn't even come to my house cuz i'd be afraid he'd bring the stinge with him. das just nasty. who da hell wanna be chillin ova some guy house while starring at a box of shyt. he knows his place is nasty. didn't something in his brain tell him at one point "hey man...clean da place up cuz it stinks".

i'd tell him about himself. just because he is a mechanic doesn't excuse him from keeping a clean house. if he had any type of gumption about himself, he would have made an effort to try to clean up, knowin u were comin ova. most people with dirty houses will either come outside to talk to you, or pick up da pile of garbage and shove it in another room and close da door until you leave.

not dis bama. he gotchu in da house smellin like cat shyt n hot garbage.

and see, after a while, cats will start going to the bathroom in other parts of the house because cats are essentially clean animals to begin with, so it's not that cat who is dirty, it's the owner. cats can't stand to go in a full liter box.

i've always said and i'll say it again...animals have more common sense than humans.

i hope yall wasn't phuckin amongst da funk....

 

[PopLife]

If he was a sweet guy I would date him. I couldn't handle the smell of cat pee though. I would tell him as nicely as possible that the smell is nauseating. Is it just the litter box or has the cat been peeing around the house? He probably has no idea how strong the smell is. If he really likes you and is mature I think he would work on the smell. If he gets offended or makes no effort to get rid of the stankiness then I would drop him.

I think most men need a little help in the cleanliness department. It's the neat freak men that can really drive a woman crazy.

Ditto....I'm more suspicious of neat freak guys...I've found them to be very anal.

Tell him to buy some scoop away (litter), a hooded litter box, and some plugins...

 

[Oasis]

one of my ex's place was ****ing disgusting. the first time i went over was unexpected so he didn't clean up before hand and i got to see how he really lived. again . it was so filthy i didn't even want to move or sit down. he cleaned it up after that but it still wasn't up to my standards.

i'm a tidy, germaphobic, neat freak to the core so the fact that i looked forward to going to his place was a true testament to how much i cared for that *****.

never again doe.

 

[Theo]

No.. If he knew you were coming over he should have at least cleaned up. If I go to a dudes house and the stuff isnt neat, I call him out on it. It's about being hospitable, really. I mean I clean up when I'm expecting guests, why wouldn't he?

I don't know if it's enough to break up with someone tho... As long as this isn't apart of an overall pattern of rude behavior, and y'all aren't spending too much time chillin at the crib.

 

[tuffCOOKiE]

I would expect a 23 yo boy's home to look a little untidy. I think you should just let him know that he should clean up before he has company.

The men I hang out with don't do that.

 

[FelaShrine]

It's one thing if it was even unexpected but dude invited YOU over to his place which btw reminded me of the come and chill threads but I digress...

nd see, after a while, cats will start going to the bathroom in other parts of the house because cats are essentially clean animals to begin with, so it's not that cat who is dirty, it's the owner. cats can't stand to go in a full liter box.

LOL exactly. which is why the situation is so ironic

 

[Evolving78]

he invited you over and still didn't clean? imagine if you married him or moved in with him? he would never change. i am too old to entertain that type of stuff anymore. i like things a certain way. i am aspiring neat freak, with procrastination tendencies!

 

[jenny87]

It was more spur of the moment than a whole planned activity.....

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[PretteePlease]

I attract neat freaks. REALLY Freakishly clean like their homes look like unlived unloved model homes. They annoy me. They are the same about their clothes and cars. I'm the opposite. I couldn't date a guy that was nasty or dirty.

eta: my neat freaks all dislike pets

 

[RocStar]

So this guy invites me over to his place and I say okay.

He has the biggest cat I have ever seen and his place smelled like cat, I saw some huge cobwebs, and on the way out I saw the most disgusting litter box I have ever seen. He is also a mechanic by trade and 23.

So half of my friends are saying I should stop talking to him because of the problems I had with the way his house looked. But the other 1/2 are saying "he's a single guy and he lives alone what did you expect??

Thoughts?? Should I keep talking to him, or kick him to the curb??

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Did he ask you to come over and chill?

 

[jenny87]

Did he ask you to come over and chill?

RocStar I guess you can say that. But I don't have a problem with "chilling" with people at their place. Maybe when I turn 25 I will care more.

I mentioned in a thread before that I think the whole "come chill" thing depends on different things for different folks. Not to long ago I was staying in the dorms and where I go to college "going to chill" with someone is pretty common and acceptable.

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