He likes to be taken out too...

[nappystorm]

Um I don't care. I don't like him like that and I'm jobless.

Yeah I'm selfish like that. LOL!!!

 

[frankie]

He should've been born a girl!

 

[nappystorm]

I met him about a week ago at a resturant (I eat out alone). He asked me out. I said okay. He starts telling me some story about his car. I was drifting in and out, wondering the point. He then turned around and asked me to pick him up. I politely asked him why did he ask me out if his car wasn't fixed and declined. He called the next day after his car got fixed.

Now this. I personally don't think the brother has a car...

 

[JustKiya]

I take my husband out. Men I'm not married to take me out. Real simple.

 

[glam-]

Guys kill me lately with all this, we like to be taken out too, if I buy you an engagement ring are you going to get me a wedding watch.... puhleeze

Why does it have to be tit for tat? Asking that is just not sexy

 

[AnjelLuvs]

Guys these days are a mess... erplexed... I am getting outta interest with this dude that wants to be chased basically, he will send a text, and expect me to call him back... I just cant...

 

[Filmatic]

Ewww no. I may take a dude out but that is 6 months- 1 year down the line on a birthday or something. BUT they always end up taking me shopping or getting me say(a new digital camera) that day too.

Other than that no. He sounds broke.

 

[Sugar Brown]

walk away.

 

[Growinpainz]

These dudes are a trip! they only do that because someone else has allowed him to take advantage of them and he thinks he can do it with every woman he meets. I have never paid for a date, i mean, he's supposed to be courting me not the other way around. I pity the fool!

 

[Gigi-07]

walk away.

..........far away!

 

[NYLegalNewbie]

I think that if you're dating a guy who really is a good guy, then it's different. The reality is that guys do, in fact, like gestures on the part of women to show them that they, too are appreciated (and no, just giving him "some" doesn't count, he does the same for you and yet you still expect him to do other things as well). The gesture doesn't have to consist of dinner, but a guy likes to feel appreciated as well.

Case in point. I've been seeing this guy for over a month now. A real sweetheart. He has no qualms about taking me out to wherever I want. He's not rich, but he has a great career (college professor). It's been our custom to split a cab on the way home since we live across the park from each other. One night, when I was being dropped off first, I only had my credit card, and the a&&hole cab driver took away the credit card option, and I didn't have any cash. So, my date was stuck footing the whole bill for the cab. He'd paid for everything that night and we had a wonderful meal, and I felt bad. So, I told him, "Next week, it's your turn. I'm taking you out to a great dinner." And, ladies, I didn't go cheap on him. Took him to one of the nicest spots in the Village. I could tell he was stunned and tickled pink over it. He was positively giddy the entire night. But best of all, it felt really nice to take a nice guy out for a change.

Guys should definitely want to treat you, but if he's a good guy, I think it really leaves a great impression when you show him that you want to treat him well too.

 

[FluffyRed]

I take my husband out. Men I'm not married to take me out. Real simple.

THANK YOU

These dudes are a trip! they only do that because someone else has allowed him to take advantage of them and he thinks he can do it with every woman he meets. I have never paid for a date, i mean, he's supposed to be courting me not the other way around. I pity the fool!

Please! The day when those penis people start having periods and giving birth to babies is the day we will be "equal" IMO. I'm with Kiya.

I think that if you're dating a guy who really is a good guy, then it's different. The reality is that guys do, in fact, like gestures on the part of women to show them that they, too are appreciated (and no, just giving him "some" doesn't count, he does the same for you and yet you still expect him to do other things as well). The gesture doesn't have to consist of dinner, but a guy likes to feel appreciated as well.

Case in point. I've been seeing this guy for over a month now. A real sweetheart. He has no qualms about taking me out to wherever I want. He's not rich, but he has a great career (college professor). It's been our custom to split a cab on the way home since we live across the park from each other. One night, when I was being dropped off first, I only had my credit card, and the a&&hole cab driver took away the credit card option, and I didn't have any cash. So, my date was stuck footing the whole bill for the cab. He'd paid for everything that night and we had a wonderful meal, and I felt bad. So, I told him, "Next week, it's your turn. I'm taking you out to a great dinner." And, ladies, I didn't go cheap on him. Took him to one of the nicest spots in the Village. I could tell he was stunned and tickled pink over it. He was positively giddy the entire night. But best of all, it felt really nice to take a nice guy out for a change.

Guys should definitely want to treat you, but if he's a good guy, I think it really leaves a great impression when you show him that you want to treat him well too.

Taking a man to an expensive restaurant after a MONTH of dating? Why does he have you splitting cab fare anyway? That sounds real liberated, but, HELLS NAW! (no offense to you, but the idea of that is horrifying)

We can turn the tables and I will go all out once he "puts a ring on it."

I am only interested in "stunning" and "tickling pink" my hubs.

Being a "good guy" is what gets you in the door. No extra consideration for being a "good guy."

Team Rules and WMLB

 

[cicilypayne]

..........far away!

run run

run fast fast faster

 

[envybeauty]

I met him about a week ago at a resturant (I eat out alone). He asked me out. I said okay. He starts telling me some story about his car. I was drifting in and out, wondering the point. He then turned around and asked me to pick him up. I politely asked him why did he ask me out if his car wasn't fixed and declined. He called the next day after his car got fixed.

Now this. I personally don't think the brother has a car...

I can't believe he asked you to pick him up. SMH

 

[Arcadian]

If your spidey senses are going off in a bad way, then you need to leave him alone.

I take SO out. I've taken men out before him. Most of the guys I dated before SO were very surprised that when I asked then out, I actually paid too! It was never a big deal for me because that put me in the driver's seat where the date was concerned.

trust your instincts in this area. If you know you're not the type to pay on a date, then you tell him so. He either respects it or not.

-A

 

[Mai Tai]

Dear LHCF :

Ladies...there are a lot of "kept" men out there. This is a new trend in the dating scene and I find it quite amusing. These are men who expect to be chased, wined and dined all while maintaining their status as a low-life that still stays at home with mom, and drive their friend's cars.

Now ladies...do not get the "kept" man confused with the good guy, SO, or DH.

The good guy/SO/DH:
- is a man that usually has no problem treating his woman.
- never asks you to pay, but since he is such a good man that treats you well, deserves to be treated every once in a while.
-will not offer to take you out on a date on the premise that you plan the date, and provide transportation.
-has never even heard of an engagement bracelet, or a wedding watch.

A "kept" man:
-would typically be hard to spot if it wasn't for the pink Mary Kay car he's sportin'.
-will ask you for gas money during the date.
-will take you to a buffet, pay for dinner for one, then eat off your plate.
-has absolutely no problem leaving his wallet at home, or all of a sudden taking an important long distance phone call when the tab comes.

So ladies, do not fall for the "kept" man's antics when he approaches you in the mall or while at church. Do not be the suga mama...let the "keepers" stay at the bee farm.

Yours truly in the movement...

"Mai Tai"

 

[nappystorm]

Update:
The day I posted this thread, he asked me for a date. I said yes because I wanted to see Madea Goes to Jail. I told him I had a meeting at church and would be leaving at 8. He said that was fine. He basically pulled a no call, no show. I wasn't tripping. Anyway Sat. night

*phone rings*
NS(Answers against better judgement) Hello
KG: Let's go to the movies tonight. I want to see Madea Goes to Jail. I'm in the mood to laugh tonight
NS: Huh?
KG: Come on. Let's go. It's 8:30 now. I should be ready in a few minutes.
NS: Umm...erplexed
KG: Gone on and get ready...
NS: Wasn't we supposed to do this Wednesday?
KG: Well you know you had that church thing...
NS: Don't even try it. If you wanted to go to the movies, you shouldn't have stood me up Wednesday
KG: Is that what you call it? I didn't stand you up.
NS: Okay you made a date with me and didn't call or show up. That's exactly what it is.
KG: Well I was waiting for you to call me back. I thought you was going to call me.
NS: You thought I was going to call you?
KG: Yeah. I was waiting...
NS: You know what? You are full of crap. Too late.Like I said if you wanted to take me out you should have showed up or called Wednesday. I have plans. Bye! (Hang up)

 

[nappystorm]

If your spidey senses are going off in a bad way, then you need to leave him alone.

I take SO out. I've taken men out before him. Most of the guys I dated before SO were very surprised that when I asked then out, I actually paid too! It was never a big deal for me because that put me in the driver's seat where the date was concerned.

trust your instincts in this area. If you know you're not the type to pay on a date, then you tell him so. He either respects it or not.

-A

Sorry sweetie, I can't quite get with this. Just seems...unnatural
To each his own though.

 

[DayStar]

that disease is going around...bieshh ***-ness

 

[nappystorm]

that disease is going around...bieshh ***-ness

 

[Arcadian]

Sorry sweetie, I can't quite get with this. Just seems...unnatural
To each his own though.

Thats cool. Like I said, it isn't for everybody. No man after the first guy I dated ever treated me anything less than respectful...even if I'm the one that paid for the date. But the majority of the guys I dated...well...they knew if they didn't show up for a date, there was somebody else waiting to take their spot

Let me make it clear, the ONLY way I pay for the date is if I'm the one doing the asking. No thats not for everybody either but thats how I operate.

If a guy asks, there's no way I'd pay. SO is a different duck of another color. We live together going on 10 years and so yeah, I take him out on a whim as he does with me.

-A

 

[AnjelLuvs]

^^^Thats what I thought Arcadian... I was like hol'up, what arcadian talkin bout aint no new wappersnappa.... Lol... And, she aint talking about no first date....

 

[tiara76]

guys do like gestures of gifts and dates....
however they appreciate it when they aren't asking for it

if they are asking and implying things you are dealing with a different type of dude who may be looking for a meal ticket....

there are alot of guys struggling or trying to get it together who are not the dudes who are going around asking for women to take care of them or take them out, they would appreciate the help or appreciate a gesture from one.... but they don't expect it or just be hounding a woman for things, and they do try to do what they can as far as taking her out or doing things for her

so its one thing running into a guy who is just on deadbeat status and using weak types of psychology on a woman with all the women need to be doing this and that and taking care of me, taking me out

and another to make a gesture to a guy you think is cool, has done stuff for you and you appreciate it .....let me take you out tonite or to lunch or breakfast....i got you a lil gift...they do like that sort of stuff esp when they don't expect it.....when the thought is genuine they feel it and it makes them want to do even more stuff for you....

guys don't ever expect me to do anything for them but I do all sorts of different lil things just cause I feel like it....and they don't know what to do with themselves and it makes them feel like they are appreciated

I do appreciate things men do for me...I don't expect them to do anything, i appreciate the things they do and I like to show it one way or another because I know I deal with alot of guys who truly are feeling me and I like to let them know I appreciate them and the love they show me.....Im not one of those "supposta" people..this what u supposed to be doing so do it....

so I can take a guy out, buy him a gift, write him a letter or a note tellin him that I appreciate him....they love it