Girl, I understand! I was in a relationship for six years and even though I've moved on, I know that I can't have contact w/ him b/c it's hard to get over someone that you've spent so much of your life with. We really were not meant for one another and I'm much happier with my new boyfriend, but it is still hard sometimes since we basically entered adulthood together. Another thing that you should consider is if he really is your friend. I don't know the circumstances of your relationship, but I know that I had to realize that the things that my ex said and did to me showed me that he was not a good friend to me. He's not a bad person, but clearly, I need to make sure that I am surrounded w/ positive people who compliment me and help me to be a better person. I don't think that we were that for one another.
i just had to cosign on this one.
this was sort of my situation.
Was with someone for a long time, we broke up about 1.5 years ago. Didn't talk for a year after the break-up. He told everyone that we never dated
I was beyond hurt by this. It's so weird SAYING this, because it makes NO SENSE, but even though he didn't treat me too well, somehow I expected better from him. I would have never imagined that he would have actually erased me completely from his life.
So I didn't talk to him for nearly a year. A few months before that year was up, he made contact with me, asking how I was doing. I had no desire to talk to him at the time, and told him I had to go. I felt no anger then, and was happy to realize that I was putting everything behind me.
A few months later, he makes contact with me again, and this time starts telling me how he's changed, etc.
I got on the principle that maybe people can change. He was saying a lot of the things that I had wanted to show him, things about himself that he was denying, so I thought he was starting to change. And it was nice to know that he had done it on his own, and that I didn't force him to.
well... I kept talking to him, and at first I noticed some changes, not only in the way we communicated, but just in the way he interacted with others as well and thought that was good... BUT
sure enough, he started exhibiting some of the SAME behavior that made me leave. It was soooo disappointed
and really sad, because I felt like I fell for the okey-doke again.
I realize, I can't even be friends with this person at all. Too much history, too much pain to remember. I don't like that even though I had forgiven him, some things that he did would come to mind. Now I don't even have to think about them AT ALL.
Like she said, I want help being a better person, and he's not the right person for it. All he does is add drama, confusion, and doubt to my life.
I feel like I'm truly ready for a fulfilling relationship, whenever the new person comes along
whew that felt like a journal entry. Not sure if I helped at all
but I just wanted to share my story.