"Good Hair" vs. "Bad Hair" (kinda long)

[asubeauty]

Just wanted to know if it was just me...

A friend and I were talking one day, and the topic turned to hair. I don't know WHY I talk about it with her... I mentioned conditioner washes and EVOO and she looked at me like I was crazy....

Anyhoo, she told me about her mother's hair. Her mother probably has type 3b/3c hair, and she said her mother has "good hair" and she just wears it short and it's all curly. So I'm like, "What do you mean by 'good hair'?" She says, when hair is curly or wavy, it's "good". Hair that is kinky or "nappy" is "bad" hair.

So I tell her that I don't agree. I think that "good hair" is healthy hair, whether it is straight, wavy, kinky, or curly. I used one of my natural 4a/4b friends as an example. "See, I would say that (natural friend) has good hair. Her fro is always cute and its very healthy."

She replies, "No, her hair is nappy. That's bad hair."

Does anyone think that this method of classifying "good hair" and "bad hair is ingorant"? Furthermore, does anyone else think that there should me no such term as "good hair" and "bad hair"? Maybe "healthy hair" and "unhealthy/damaged hair"????

 

[CandiceC]

Girl, a friend of mine said "good hair" yesterday. This was not the first time I heard her say this so I just cringed on the inside and let her just keep talking about whatever she was talking about. I had to tell myself not to say anything about it. I already tried to explain it to her, but obviously it went in one ear and out the other.

 

[krissyprissy]

My roomate uses this term "good hair " all the time. I explained to her that Good hair is healthy hair and she just looked at me with this blank look on her face. Then she went on to explain that her boyfriend is half Hawian and his kids all hair that "good hair" too. I just looked at her and shook my head. Some folks just dont know any better.

 

[Poohbear]

I agree with you! I also think it is ignorant for people to think that kinky is bad and wavy is good. No one can help what texture grows through their scalp.

 

[curlygirl493]

i get that good hair bs all the time, I usually look at the person who said that like thier crazy. it really makes me mad that black people still have this "white is right" mentality. if your your hair is healthy and bangin....that some GOOD HAIR

 

[sugaplum]

Yeah my friend told me that I have "good hair" I didn't know what he meant by that. I never knew why people would tell me that. I have a perm and his hair is all natural fro and I L-O-V-E his becuase it's well conditoned and oiled (where I helped him in that department).

 

[Porsche19]

I don't mind the words good and bad to describe hair.

The description of hair only being good when it's not kinky is what bothers me.

How can such a widespread black trait be considered to be bad by black people?

It's like saying darker skin is bad and lighter skin is good. It's just sad for people to think that way about themselves.

 

[caligirl]

I think good hair is hair that is easy to manage and healthy looking. We tend to associate "easy to manage" with wash and wear hair and hair that looks shiny and smooth. Usually this is type 3/2/1 hair. Type 4 hair can be wash and wear too, but it doesn't usually have that smooth, shiny look.

 

[Porsche19]

Does that mean that it's BAD though caligirl?

 

[pookeylou]

It is a term used among us (black people) that began with interracism initiated during slavery.

An excellent guide on the history of the belief is a book called HAIRSTORY.

A slave owner introduced the idea of getting slaves to control one another by planting the idea that the features of a black person which most resembled white people were more beautiful. Those slaves that looked most "white" were allowed lighter work and controlling positions over darker slaves. Their hair texture was also used as a determining factor.

The propoganda was introduced so deeply and has spread for so long, that now we use hair as a method to degrade each other. "Your hair is NAPPY!" as if nappy hair, God-given textured hair is bad.

Interracism is real. The only way to stop it...is to 1) correct it when someone says it in your presence and 2) be proud of all of your features and carry yourself as such.

 

[LaNecia]

I'm learning, very slowly, not to engage in this line of convo w/others that don't understand that Healthy Hair is good and Unhealthy Hair is Bad. Most don't get it.

I have a co-work who's a 4a/b, same as me, almost identical in fact, she says my hair is "good" and can't be the same texture as hers because it doesn't look dry and brittle like hers. I've even shown her my before pictures. I gave her my hair journal to read on what I do for my hair, she gave it back and said it was too much work...but she complains about her hair... . Just this morning she commented on my hair and how nice it looks, I told I washed it before I came to work, her reply was: "You sound like those white people washing your hair everyday. Black people's hair gets dry when you wash it that much"...

I don't try to explain it anymore, I just smile sweetly (as much as I can, I'm a horrible faker) and let them ramble.

 

[curlygirl493]

any hair type can be easy to manage/wash and go....you just have to learn how to take care of it properly.

 

[Enchantmt]

MY mom and sisters use this term and my supervisor (white) used it the other week. Its hard to educate folx and it makes a decision to go natural almost militant or political whether you want it to be or not because of the negative perception of natural black hair. I dont care how "good" someones hair is, meaning how smooth the texture, if they dont take care of it its not attractive and I tend to look at folx differently when they make those kind of comments because it makes me wonder what types of judgements they make and values they place on certain physical characteristics. I have this other guy, older guy at work that says to me EVERYDAY since I did the BC, "You better hurry up and grow your hair back", like short hair is a crime. *rme* Lawd I wanna slap him and he's a lil perv too that always talks in that lil dirty ole man voice when he speaks to me tryin to sound sexy. Makes my darn skin crawl and makes me mad at the same time...smh...

 

[caligirl]

I've never really heard someone use the term "bad hair." All I know is "good hair" is the kind that people ooh and ahh over.

 

[caligirl]

Oh, and how many of us are trying to get that smooth, shiny look with gel, oil/grease, and tying a scarf real tight? I think its just something that we learn is beautiful.

 

[Narla]

My grandmother told my 13yo daughter that her hair wasn't "good enough" to wear without straightening (hot comb, relaxer). My daughter replied (very respectfully) "Mother, I think any hair on your head is "good hair" if it's healthy and that's what you want it to be!" That's MY BABY!!!

 

[divine]

People know i'm natural, but I always wear my hair in braids. They thought I was crazy last year when I cut my hair to go natural. I wore my hair out last week for the first time, and couple of my friends said I had " good hair", and that they couldn't go natural b/c they have really nappy hair. Some people have issues, and one of the main reason why I plain on teaching my child that all healthy hair is good hair.

 

[senimoni]

I grew up using this term...I try not to so much, but "good" has definitely become synonomous with curly/wavy hair if I am describing someone. If someone w/o curly /wavy hair had nice hair to me I would say they had pretty hair. Growing up there where NO positive memories of my hair, not combing it, relaxing it, etc. I'm not saying its right but I can understand where it comes from. In my mind my Moms hair was good b/c she didn't need a relaxer to get her hair straight or when it gets wet its curly ....which she could throw into a ponytail and go. On the same token my hair was bad b/c I could not get my hand through it. Like I said I am not advocating it, but I understand.

 

[hottopic]

It is a term used among us (black people) that began with interracism initiated during slavery.

An excellent guide on the history of the belief is a book called HAIRSTORY.

A slave owner introduced the idea of getting slaves to control one another by planting the idea that the features of a black person which most resembled white people were more beautiful. Those slaves that looked most "white" were allowed lighter work and controlling positions over darker slaves. Their hair texture was also used as a determining factor.

The propoganda was introduced so deeply and has spread for so long, that now we use hair as a method to degrade each other. "Your hair is NAPPY!" as if nappy hair, God-given textured hair is bad.

Interracism is real. The only way to stop it...is to 1) correct it when someone says it in your presence and 2) be proud of all of your features and carry yourself as such.

Amen sista I agree with you on that one. I still hear it too. It did not really bother me before, but then when I started to learn about hair. I try to educate other people about it, but I don't go into history.

 

[Jewell]

A stylist once commented on my sister's hair saying that "She's got that good hair...that hair that will just wave up if you put water in it..." WTH? I guess my hair wasn't good because I had a relaxer. Whatever. Yes, this classification is very ignorant, and there's no such thing as "good hair" or "bad hair" hair is hair, and classifying it isn't going to change what texture comes out of the scalp.

 

[hopeful]

asubeauty,
I just hate the whole good hair/ bad hair thing. So many things are running through my mind that I can't even find a way to articulate to you how frustrating it is to me. I agree, it is ignorant, but more than that it is just sad.

 

[Porsche19]

It is a term used among us (black people) that began with interracism initiated during slavery.

An excellent guide on the history of the belief is a book called HAIRSTORY.

A slave owner introduced the idea of getting slaves to control one another by planting the idea that the features of a black person which most resembled white people were more beautiful. Those slaves that looked most "white" were allowed lighter work and controlling positions over darker slaves. Their hair texture was also used as a determining factor.

The propoganda was introduced so deeply and has spread for so long, that now we use hair as a method to degrade each other. "Your hair is NAPPY!" as if nappy hair, God-given textured hair is bad.

Interracism is real. The only way to stop it...is to 1) correct it when someone says it in your presence and 2) be proud of all of your features and carry yourself as such.

Although I agree that much of the white is right mentallty is drilled into people's heads, I don't think that it all stems from Slavery. How would that account for the same thing all over the world... in Asian countries in which there was no white on African slavery?

I would say that a big part of this problem stems from that fact that on the social ladder, whites seem to be on the highest rungs (especially in the past) and people want to be in the same place. Therefore many equate white with being rich, beautiful, succesful and happy.

 

[Kitkat]

It's really sad that the ignorance of good vs. bad hair continues in 2005. . .

 

[SandySea]

Ironically, I was recently having a conversation with a friend of mine the other day. She was describing a little girl as having "Good hair--not nappy at all." My jaw almost dropped to the floor. Suddenly I wanted to excuse myself from my own livingroom. The thing that got me is that she has thick, almost waist length hair (what would be called "good hair"); and it made me wonder where I fell on her hair hierarchy--I guess I would have "bad, nappy hair." I just don't get it. Back when I was natural, I actually had a hair dresser tell me "Oh, your hair is not bad at all." I was like "huh?" Let's face it, the closer to white any of your features are (hair, skin, features, etc.) the more acceptable you are. It's a mentality that is deep seeded within our race.

 

[RushGirl]

I grew up using this term...I try not to so much, but "good" has definitely become synonomous with curly/wavy hair if I am describing someone. If someone w/o curly /wavy hair had nice hair to me I would say they had pretty hair. Growing up there where NO positive memories of my hair, not combing it, relaxing it, etc. I'm not saying its right but I can understand where it comes from. In my mind my Moms hair was good b/c she didn't need a relaxer to get her hair straight or when it gets wet its curly ....which she could throw into a ponytail and go. On the same token my hair was bad b/c I could not get my hand through it. Like I said I am not advocating it, but I understand.

I agree with what you just said... that "good hair" thing was something that I was brought up with.. so when someone says it.. It doesn't bother me because I know what they are talking about.. now that I'm older and into the "hair" thing.. I know the difference of what "good" hair really means.. and I use it in that way now.. but it doesn't bother me personally when someone says that.. it's just a term that is from "back in the day"... If I had never found this board.. I wouldn't have known any better....so when people use that term, I don't think that they are ignorant at all..they just don't know any better..

 

[ellennicole]

It has taken my literally YEARS to get out of this mentality. My dad has naturally curly hair and he would ALWAYS comment on my hair texture when he combed my hair. He would say I had "bad hair" b/c my hair wasn't as wavy as his. I had a SERIOUS complex about my hair. Now that I'm grown, I always feel uncomfortable when people say I have "good hair" b/c of its texture. It's a term that I definitely avoid.

 

[jainygirl]

It's ignorant but as long as people use it to classify hair, it'll stay around like the electric slide. That shyt aint going nowhere.

 

[balisi]

This good hair/bad hair business absolutely burns my biscuit! When are people going to realize that hair texture has nothing at all to do with the quality of hair being either "good" or "bad." To me, any hair that is on your head, thriving, glowing and healthy, is "good." Period. Thankfully, the good/bad hair thing was never used in my house. I do understand what is meant when others mention it, but I certainly don't agree with it. Since I've unveiled my natural hair texture to the "world" I've been hearing a lot about how "good" my hair is, and people will say that they could never go natural because they don't have that "good" hair. Even during my transition, when I mentioned that I was going to go completely natural, I was asked, "what are you going to do with your hair" as if it is incomprehensible for a sister to not keep her hair straightened.

 

[asubeauty]

I'm glad that I'm not the only one to think this. Just last nite that same friend and I were watching American Idol and I commented on the girl with the natural hair. I love her hair; I think that it is really nice. She was like "No, that's too nappy." Me: "What's wrong with nappy? It's a part of being black." Her: "Well you wear your hair like that!" Me: "I will. I plan to go natural after college" Her: "Well go natural now!!" Me: (in my head)

I give up on her. She's a lost cause.