Getting back together

[alwaysinchrist]

Ladies could you share your stories of reconcilation and advice......

I have been married for less than a year and we have been seprated for about 5months. Last month I got served divorce papers and I thought we was over until yesterday. He didnt complete the paper work and now he wants our marriage out with counseling with my pastors. We are no longer living under the same roof. He wants us to give it 3months of growing and reconnecting before we find another apt for us. Currently, I am in a 2br but we will have to get a 3br apt because he has 2boys and I have one.

I still love him and want us to work it out but I am so angry from the infedlity (when we was seperated and the lies)

 

[**SaSSy**]

Ladies could you share your stories of reconciliation and advice......

I have been married for less than a year and we have been seprated for about 5months. Last month I got served divorce papers and I thought we was over until yesterday. He didn't complete the paper work and now he wants our marriage out with counseling with my pastors. We are no longer living under the same roof. He wants us to give it 3months of growing and reconnecting before we find another apt for us. Currently, I am in a 2br but we will have to get a 3br apt because he has 2boys and I have one.

I still love him and want us to work it out but I am so angry from the infidelity (when we was separated and the lies)

He seems to want to control this entire situation with you just going along for the ride. I would agree to the counseling first, before any talk of reconciliation. This might just be a way for him to pacify you for now, you should really take some time out for yourself to see if it's really worth you getting back with a man who disrespected your marriage vows by cheating.

 

[fletgee]

OP...

If you do decide on counseling, consider this. Marriage counseling is better rendered by a state liscensed party who will offer their professional services without an underlying agenda (such as religion).

 

[alwaysinchrist]

Thanks! I am such a spirtural person I wouldnt dare get counseling from another source. We start this Sat and we have a date night sat evening so I hope all goes well.....

 

[toinette]

Thanks! I am such a spirtural person I wouldnt dare get counseling from another source. We start this Sat and we have a date night sat evening so I hope all goes well.....

do you think its wise to start making date nights without having even started counseling yet? the man has yet to do anything to make you feel confident in reuniting yet you already have a date planned

 

[caltron]

No advice, but I just wanted to wish you the best OP.

 

[Makenzie]

Thanks! I am such a spirtural person I wouldnt dare get counseling from another source. We start this Sat and we have a date night sat evening so I hope all goes well.....

Seems like you both want to work this out. Hope it turns out well for you. I know this is not easy. **hugs**

 

[alwaysinchrist]

do you think its wise to start making date nights without having even started counseling yet? the man has yet to do anything to make you feel confident in reuniting yet you already have a date planned

Yea we gotta start somewhere and we are having our 1st session before we go out. We are taking it slow....this is the test to see if we make it or we dont.

 

[carcajada]

Yea we gotta start somewhere and we are having our 1st session before we go out. We are taking it slow....this is the test to see if we make it or we dont.

Good luck! Although i agree with the other posts, Only you two can determine how fast or slow and what order you want to progress with things.

 

[Lucie]

I am very happy for you. Please take your time in this. I really do hate divorce and think many marriages could be salvaged. I am sorry about the infidelity. I've been on both sides of that coin and it is really a painful experience. You mentioned your faith, so ask God to guide you. Do not discuss this with too many people because you might have too many opinions clouding your judgment.

You know your husband better than any of us do. If he wants to work things out, you need to watch his actions and not his words. Good luck to you honey.

 

[Lenee925]

I have no advice. Being a believer myself, if I was going through this situation I would probably set aside time to fast and pray for direction before I even agreed to counseling or even a date night to be honest. I'd probably give myself a week or two to unplug and just listen; quieting my own desires and emotions so that I can think clearly. I would just ask for God to open my eyes and help me see anything that I am perhaps blind to and go from there.

 

[alwaysinchrist]

Thanks ladies so much

 

[alwaysinchrist]

It didn't work out cuz he is a liar but im ok. Im done trying!!

 

[Anakinsmomma]

sorry OP.

 

[firecracker]

Sorry to hear he is still on one aka lying instead of just being honest. I hope you have a good holiday season and stay strong in prayer.

 

[alwaysinchrist]

Thanks soo much for the hugs m support. Im prayed to God for peace which he has granted me to move on!! Im ready to start a new chapter in my life. Im relocating after this season n going back to school

 

[ONAMSHN]

Best of luck to you......

 

[Anakinsmomma]

Good luck! School always helps me to move on...

 

[ThickHair]

Good luck! School always helps me to move on...

Yup, I went to grad school to keep my mind off my divorce.

 

[EbonyTresses]

There is definitely life after divorce! Be encouraged

 

[song_of_serenity]

Any updates, OP? How are things with that situation and school?

 

[alwaysinchrist]

Any updates, OP? How are things with that situation and school?

We got a divorced and it was the best decision I made. I have recently started dating which is nice. I was bitter and angry for a while but now I know that I would like to get married again with the right man. Timing is everything lol. Im in no rush for anything serious. I plan to go back to school next year. Thanks for asking.