Does your family has some stuff to say...?

[pazyamor]

Warning: I'm going to rant...a little.

Does your family have crazy stuff to say about your hair care regimen? I haven't really divulged my new obsession to my family yet; but they're catching on. The other day, I was telling my sister about LHCF and how it's really helped my hair, she looked me dead in the face and said, "well, your hair is the same length" I said, "no it isn't, look you can see all the black from roots where it's outgrowing the color" (mind you, my hair is blonde right noow) and she just rolled her eyes (she is a cosmetologist BTW, and the reason I'm blonde). And last week I was putting a nice Avocado/honey/various oils conditioning mask on and my aunt says, "all your hair is going to fall out with all that natural crap." Then she precedded to call my mother, my grandmother, and my other three aunts and told them I was putting some "avocado, honey, syrup crap on her head...I know girl, it's going to fall off" I just rolled my eyes and kept it pushing.

Do you guys get the same thing? Are the women in your family still not having it?

 

[krissynick]

Not really. Maybe once my mother says I shouldnt mess with my hair so much but i dont pay her no mind cause she doesnt know what she is talking bout. YOur i hair s not gonna grow overnight so dont worry bout that. And yes if they feel you are going overboard just ignore it... wait a year and lets see how ur hairs grow and see if they will still be talking...

 

[longhairdreamzz]

Yeah, when I told my mom about the MN challege she gave me that "WTF?" look. Then she later on that night when she was talking on the phone w/ her friend she told her friend that I was using vagina cream on my head. Yes, that's exactly what she said. I was soooooo embarrassed.

 

[nicki6]

Take a lil advice from a hair vet....keep your hair aspirations/goals/desires to yourself. The consensus among most AA women is that its not possible to have the hair you want.

Ignore them and let your hair speak for itself.


My mama was VERY skeptical...even after I showed her the ladies on this site. She got much more supportive after I grew her balding crown back

Now every time she sees me she asks if its all my hair...and I'm not even APL yet

 

[ravenmerlita]

I think my family is starting to catch on to my obsession. It's okay though because I live 3 hours away from all of my family. Since I only get to see them on holidays, birthdays and special occasions, it's easier for them to see the progress. So I don't get too much drama.

 

[Dposh167]

My mother said something to me 3 months ago. She saw ALLLL the products I use (cuz of my pj'ism) and told me..."that's why your hair doesn't grow cuz u use too many products"

...but after my recent relaxer she COMPLETELY changed her attitude. She couldn't believe how my hair has grown and the healthier condition it's in. She even asked me if SHE COULD USE MY PRODUCTS. the same products she was complaining about....my my my

 

[wheezy807]

I live with my aunt and she doesn't bother me about my haircare. She sees it growing and is always complimenting me and asking questions. Yeah as soon as they see your hair getting longer all of that will stop. Instead they will be telling you all about their hair problems and asking for advice. Just watch!
@ longhairdreamzz: Why you got me bursting out laughing @ wrk? RMAO! They think i'm crazy up in here!

 

[BrooklynSouth]

Not really. My Mommy says I should not shampoo my hair so often but the others admire my growing process, my phony ponies, wigs of different colors, styles....my constant hair surprises.

 

[Evazhair]

Girl YES!

My mom calls me "hair obsessed" if I try to pass on LHCF knowledge.She is the classic case of the disinterested--until I use my products on her hair.She wants the results but she don't want to hear about it.

My dad says I am going to wash all of the hair out of my head by washing once a week. His cousin with type 4 hair washes every 3-4 weeks and her hair is OK if you like ashy looking no-lye hair. He tells me I need to do like our Granny did (type 2 hip length hair): wash once a month and use only vaseline rolleyes:I-Dont-Think-So. I keep telling him my hair is chemically treated, so.... He manages to call me everytime I am washing my hair and say stuff like "well you just washed your hair"I'm like "yeah- that was a week ago." Whew! Let me stop.....

 

[shynessqueen]

No, my family don't care. To them it's just aonther thing I'm doing. When I show them how long my hair has gotten, they tell me ,They don't know why I'm growing my hair, I'm just going to cut it off anyway. lol and ya know what, they are right lol.

 

[STLCoverGirl]

My sisters always tell people I am obsessed with my hair. I don't even care anymore, they are just being haters, lol. Like tonight for instance one of my sister's girlfriends came over her house and of course the topic of hair came up...my sister tried to bust me out in front of this chic I didn't know. I played it down and gave my sister the evil eye...she think it's funny to let strangers think I am hair crazy. It's funny though because she is always asking me hair advice now and even asked me if the "women of the hairboard"(we are a cult to her) would like her hair if she took pics, lol.

 

[youwillrise]

for the most part my family knows about my super interest in hair

but they dont really know exactly what i do to my hair or how i use my products ...or even what my goals for my hair are.

 

[IntoMyhair]

They ask what i do to my daughters hair all the time.
My hair they don't ask well my sister did tell me it is long and thick now but that i needed to perm it lol (this was back in july when had permed my hair) so my reply to her was that i did perm my hair thats it is what you call texlaxed and she STHU.

I have not permed since july so i really need 1 but no one as said anything untoward cause they no i will cuss them the hell out lol

 

[amwcah]

Yes, I get grief. I just ignore them (mother and sister) and keep it moving.

 

[Nefertiti0906]

At first they thought I was obsessed (actually they still do ), but then when they say my hair becoming longer, thicker, and more healthy they attributed it to the fact that I have "good hair", not healthy hair care practices

 

[gymfreak336]

Yep they did and still do but the conversations have changed.


In the beginning: "What in the heck are you doing"
" You are crazy, you know that ain't gonna work"
" Why are you listening to people that probably have weaves"
" You are going to wash your hair out, you condition it too much"



Now: " What are you using, can I try it"
" Look at your newgrowth, its so soft"
" What was the name of that site again?"

Don't worry..keep doing you and the conversations will change.

 

[HoneyA]

Yeah, my father says my hair will fall out because I'm always washing it or applying some product to it. He's good with taking my progress pics and complimenting my hair when I wear it out though. I was having an episode the other day and I said I was thinking of trimming and he said, "oh you'll be back to armpit then". I had to pause for a second...
My mum thinks I spend way too much time on hair forums and fotkis to the point now when I'm on the computer and she asks what I'm doing I say "nothing", she says "oh hair again?". They both think I'm completely obsessed. They see progress though so all the time spent on the boards is obviously paying off.

 

[SimpleKomplexity]

My mom is very supportive of it so far. I just started, but she's just upset that I had to read it on a website that I shouldn't get my hair relaxed every 5 weeks when she's been telling me that since I was 12.

 

[Mortons]

My grandma said All of my hair is gonna fall out.

My dad doesnt care but he was confused once when he mistaken my coconut milk/ORS Replenishing Conditioner in the fridge for dip

My mom doesnt care as long as my obsession is not boys like both my sisters

 

[nakialovesshoes]

No, my family don't care. To them it's just aonther thing I'm doing. When I show them how long my hair has gotten, they tell me ,They don't know why I'm growing my hair, I'm just going to cut it off anyway. lol and ya know what, they are right lol.

I get that, too. I've been growing & cutting & growing cutting for about 20 years now. When I grew my hair out long with the Wanakee system, my mom was ordering products. She has faith that I might be on to something but she won't jump on board until I show some progress. So probably this time next year my mom will be transitioning.

 

[*Muffin*]

No, you aren't the only one. My family is pretty accepting of my hair obsession, but certain people I know (and some I don't) will tell me "Wetting your hair like that will make it break off" when they see me spraying leave-in conditioner. A co-worker of mine even tried to tell me that my hair was "too soft" and that I needed to blow dry it to make it lie flat like hers (mind you her hair is very short and damaged). All I have to say is that the proof is in the pudding. When they see your hair flourishing and growing longer and longer, then they will have to realize that what you have been doing is good for your hair.

 

[Sugar Brown]

Yesss...only from the women though. My mother, sisters, aunties and best friends all used to warn me that my hair would: fall out, break off and be dry, ashy, and raggedy from frequent washing and from going natural.

Anyway, once my hair started growing longer and healthier I got, "Well Calyx's hair should be growing like that with all the time she spends on it..."

Whateva. I just had to learn to recognize their criticisms as compliments and keep it moving. They ALL have called me - privately - at one time or another to ask for tips.

 

[BotanyGrl]

My mom teases me from time to time but she is also very supportive Gives me tons of compliments about how my hair is growing when I know it hasn't moved an inch My SO swears he is going to be a hair expert in no time and my brother makes sure to ask me how my hair is doing every time I talk to him. They are very supportive!!! Outside of those three I really don't share my hair goals with anyone else. I learned that the hard way when my SO's brother saw me on LHCF. I showed him a few members long hair pictures and the first question he asked was "Are they mixed?" I said no, and he replied "I never seen black girls with long hair." It kinda peeved me because I've never had exactly short short hair. It's always been pretty much APL since I've known him. I'm not saying that it's long, but I felt a certain way when he said that. He's only 19, and I know he didn't mean any harm, but it still stung a bit. I can't wait to grow long healthy waist length hair to show him what BLACK GIRLS can do!!!! So now I keep my hair stuff to myself. People might not mean to be discouraging, but usually they are... especially the AAs I come into contact with outside of the board.

 

[glamazon386]

I don't tell them anything. They thought I was insane with all the weaves and wigs at first. Then going natural. But once my mom saw that my hair was healthy and growing I think she realized I knew what I was talking about. She never admitted it but she knows. Even though she goes to a stylist (who is really good with hair care) she still calls me when she has questions. She'll be like can you ask the people on the hair board such and such? She even let me do her hair a few times.

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

My mom doesn't do as I instruct her but she doesn't have anything negative to say anymore. Everytime she see's how big my wash n go is getting or see's my hair straightened she always says she is going to stop perming and let her hair grow out natural She doesn't do it though

 

[Spongie Bloom]

My grandma said All of my hair is gonna fall out.

My dad doesnt care but he was confused once when he mistaken my coconut milk/ORS Replenishing Conditioner in the fridge for dip

My mom doesnt care as long as my obsession is not boys like both my sisters

now THAT is funny right there

 

[tricie]

I get that, too. I've been growing & cutting & growing cutting for about 20 years now. When I grew my hair out long with the Wanakee system, my mom was ordering products. She has faith that I might be on to something but she won't jump on board until I show some progress. So probably this time next year my mom will be transitioning.

REALLY? Do tell! I didn't know her system really worked.

My mom would some times tell me I was using too many products, but when she saw my hair at Thanksgiving, she was like, your hair is getting long. She has some interest in some of the regimens/products I tell her about the forum, and I did give her some BT and she has used and got some growth. She ain't doing no Amla, though! I was telling my cousin about it (she may go natural), so maybe she will be a newbie here real soon!

 

[ChanelNo5]

Yeah they thought I was crazy and hair obsessed...till they saw it creepin down my back.

 

[Buttercreme]

No.

Because I keep my hair passion and obsession to myself. I don't want anyone to think I'm crazy. Only DH knows. He's been telling me for a few years to do my own hair. Once I did, it is the longest it's ever been.

But everytime my mom calls, it seems like im always washing my hair. She says "Girl, you ain't white, yo hair gon fallout" I just say "oh-yeah?"..............................(my hair is almost APL, hers can never get past the top of her ears.....hmmmm

 

[tocktick]

only my brother really knows just how crazy am i about hair. but he's been my biggest supporter in going natural. my mum supports me to an extent. sometimes she thinks it's cute when it's loose but other times she insinuates my hair is a mess. but she's never told me to continue relaxing even when her friends are telling me in my face to relax or texlax.

i have a very close friend who i shared my enthusiasm with hair a while back. but it quickly became apparent that she didn't like me talking about hair. during one of our conversations, she said black people only need to wash their hair every 2 months or so erplexed ...something about the dirt making it grow...um...yeah. she said some thing's that just opened my eyes to how she viewed me and my passion about hair. they weren't very mean things but just snidey comments that i didn't appreciate. we actually got into arguments over hair . she has a sister who is a kitchen stylist and as thus believes there is nothing you can tell her about hair. so i learnt my lesson and now know to shut up.

honestly, i think she's one of these people who think that black hair doesn't grow that long. she says the "dirt makes black hair grow" yet she's been stuck at about neck length for years now doing this "technique" and steaming alone. i hate to sound nasty but my hair has pretty much reached her length now and i've been natural for less than a year . i really want to share tips with her but she's not even open and has thus far shut down any attempts to give tips etc and wont see that it's a myth that black women's hair doesn't grow by looking at at least one fotki (lol).

the last convo we had about hair was when she was telling me her friends hair fell out from a bad relaxer and she thought of me because i have natural hair . i realised she must really think i put myself on a pedestal because i have natural hair. i have some views on why some people relax that were stronger when i was transitioning/first bc'd and i shared them with her that but i become more open-minded after a little while and she knew this. anyway, i didn't say anything in response to her that time. ironically, if my hair is loose she's always trying to touch it or has some comment to make about my hair like she's all in "awe" that the same hair that grows out of her head is growing out out mine because she doesn't think anyone but myself and another of her black friends can "pull off an afro" . whatever.

anyway, despite my bro and mum being supportive i now shut up about my hair for the most part.