Does Anyone Else Feel Like They Cant Manage Their Hair Without Heat Or Chemicals?

Napp

Ms. Nobody
*unpopular thoughts in here*


I was looking at my fotki and I noticed that my hair was the longest when I had something to soften up the texture. For me its usually a relaxer, regular heat use or keratin treatments

Is there anyone else who feels this way? I tried to be part of team natural but I don't think I can manage my natural hair texture as it is. I remember there would be times when I cried over my hair because I felt like it was too much work and didn't look right. Am I alone on this?
 
I big chopped for a second time this February.

I have very difficult hair. It's high porosity, very fine, very high density, frizzy, and tangly AF.

I was doing a lot of trial and error the first go round, more error because I didn't understand my hair.

Now that I know what I'm doing, if my hair still gives me problems, I will be a heat trained natural and I have no qualms about that.
 
Last edited:
Having stretched hair (through one method or another) is the only way I'll retain, period. Right now my method of choice is a low temp blow dry weekly plus the occasional flat iron.

Everyone's hair doesn't do well with traditional LHCF methods. Two close friends are close to Tailbone and they both use heat quite regularly. One has color (brown/blonde).

Im learning that it's about knowing your hair and not fighting it tooth and nail to make it conform to healthy hair trends. If my hair is flourishing with heat, then dammit gimme the blow dryer. :lol:

I thought about doing a light keratin treatment to get through summer but I dunno. When I look back through photos, however, my hair was the longest and oddly enough, thickest, when I was getting keratin treatments. So I'm weighing it.
 
I.completely.feel.you.!
I'm in a weird space, I have a head full of heat damage and as a result have cut my hair off into a short bob. Personally, right now I feel I look better when my hair is flat ironed and straight even though it's short. My twist outs lack the volume and poofiness from my regular natural hair. Even before this debacle, I find my hair to be too restricting in the sense that my life and movements are based around my twist out 'setting.'

Ideally, when I went natural my goal was to wear my hair straight about 1/2 the time. The issue with my hair is it's inability to remain straight and smooth. My roots puff out incredibly easily and my hair can puff and revert before I reach the end of the block if it's warm out. Idk if it's the products or the stylists, I think it's my hair. My hair has a hard time remaining straight, the roots always poof up and kills the look the of straightened hair style. Idk if I'd need a keratin treatment or what? I do know I need a skilled stylist. I need HELP. I am growing my hair out and I'm not really hell bent on being a kinky natural. I could see myself with longer hair that looks texlaxed and that way I have the ease of putting it in a bun, air drying it, doing more. But this restriction and aesthetic is driving me crazy. What I have no desire to do ever again is relax. Keratin treatments could be an option, but Idk which one is good. I tried design essentials when I was transitioning and I can't say that helped all too much. Plus I need a skilled stylist to apply it. That's another issue.
 
I also know myself, while I admire LOTS of natural do's with the flexi rods and perm rods, I don't have one desire at all to take the time and do that. I'm freaking tired of spending money on products. I just bought a set of Mane Choice products, some cantu stuff yesterday and I don't like either of them. I like being able to wash my hair, slick it in a bun, air dry, maybe add some clip ins if it's straight. If it's summertime, I can see myself washing twice weekly and rocking a poofy bun with smooth edges or doing a big braid out at night and taking my hair down in the morning. But what I have going on right now is just way too restricting any annoying.
 
Having stretched hair (through one method or another) is the only way I'll retain, period. Right now my method of choice is a low temp blow dry weekly plus the occasional flat iron.

Everyone's hair doesn't do well with traditional LHCF methods. Two close friends are close to Tailbone and they both use heat quite regularly. One has color (brown/blonde).

Im learning that it's about knowing your hair and not fighting it tooth and nail to make it conform to healthy hair trends. If my hair is flourishing with heat, then dammit gimme the blow dryer. :lol:

I thought about doing a light keratin treatment to get through summer but I dunno. When I look back through photos, however, my hair was the longest and oddly enough, thickest, when I was getting keratin treatments. So I'm weighing it.

What keratin treatment did you use?
I agree, there are plenty people who are heat trained naturals with long thick healthy looking hair. I really would like a skilled stylist that can help me achieve this.
 
@Britt basically wrote my thoughts.

When permed if I had special occasion I'd do what I had to around that style. As a natural, the lie that this hair is easier completely frustrates me. Why spend hours rolling my hair on rods for it to poof the moment I step outside? Even the quick twist out or flat twist barely get 3 days of wear (& none if I work out).

But part of the reason I went natural in the first place is my hair stopped taking a perm. I stretched, did a corrective and hair still wasn't budging. This head won't take to normal heat stretching and I am not wasting hours on a press that won't last the car ride home. Healthy hair I can never wear out is annoying. I'm ready to braid it up for next few months before I do something drastic like shave it.
 
@Britt There was a time I didn't mind doing my own hair. I was the simplest relaxed- wash, roller set, wrap or pin curl, braid/twist outs if stretching or flexi rods if I was going to be off a few days from gym.

Now my hair has turned into a chore that doesn't even reward for the time invested. And I'm wondering where do we go from here.....
 
Honestly if I could master heat styling like some of the naturals we have here (see roller set thread for example) I probably wouldn't relax. But I don't feel like being bothered learning anything new at this point :look: so I'll relax my hair for now.

I know when/if I go natural I'll NEVER airdry. I can't even let that be a consideration lol.
 
@Britt There was a time I didn't mind doing my own hair. I was the simplest relaxed- wash, roller set, wrap or pin curl, braid/twist outs if stretching or flexi rods if I was going to be off a few days from gym.

Now my hair has turned into a chore that doesn't even reward for the time invested. And I'm wondering where do we go from here.....
I could have wrote this myself lol!
My relaxed hair was a breeze. Even when I actually did work out, I'd wash twice a week, tie it down, wear in a bun/wavy ponytail next day. I'd rollerset, wrap, keep it moving or an occasional wash n set when I didn't feel like doing it.
 
Honestly if I could master heat styling like some of the naturals we have here (see roller set thread for example) I probably wouldn't relax. But I don't feel like being bothered learning anything new at this point :look: so I'll relax my hair for now.

I know when/if I go natural I'll NEVER airdry. I can't even let that be a consideration lol.

Thing is I know how to do it. Can go through all the steps. Then stand outside and my hair retreats back to its scalp. Even when I tested a spot with slightly higher heat I ended up with damage and it still poofed. I've done other people's heads. My hair is on some other stuff right now and it's not even summertime.

Air drying never worked for me whether permed or natural. It was one of those "rules" I had to learn to ignore because I wasn't getting results others raved about. Overhead dryer works fine.
 
I used to feel like this. That's why for most of the seven years that I've been natural, I've used heat weekly. But now I just do two flat twists and then a twist out on the weekends. I still straighten my hair but it's honestly too long and sweaty for me to wear it down regularly.

Do what's best for you @Napp i think Im going back to straight hair honestly. I miss running my fingers through it but now I know I can handle my curly hair.
 
This convo is very refreshing, and I appreciate everyone's honesty. Once a year for the past 2 years, I've been using the Beautiful Textures Texture Manageability kit. While I've enjoying having hair that easier to work with, I am thinking of not using it anymore because I miss the volume and true natural texture. However, y'all are reminding me how much I dislike managing the 3-4 textures that grow from my scalp - especially the patch at the top that easily tangles. *sigh.... I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm tired of bunning my hair 24/7.
 
Back
Top