Do You Believe Relationhips Are A Lot of Work?

[CurlyMoo]

http://youtu.be/7ZyQWltXEJE



Here is a video of a relationship guy who explains his relationship with his wife.


I have always thought it would be a LOT of work to maintain a long term relationship. He is giving me hope.


And I believe in setting boundaries early on in the relationship. What do you guys think? I especially want to hear from ladies in long term relationships.

 

[TopShelf]

can you re-do the link

I would love the hear from the LTR women too. You always hear people talking about relationships as hard work, struggle, etc etc

 

[tinkat]

Wise words very true. When you hold your ground in the beginning, you will weed out guys and have a higher chance of meeting your match. It was tough when we were long distance bc I missed SO so much. But now that we are together, it's not alot of work. It more of getting to know you more and learning to compromise since we live in the same space. I love it.

Wait, be positive, keep believing, and all will surely be yours. Sent from my iPhone using LHCF

 

[Briabiggles]

I didn't watch the video.

I don't think the RIGHT long term relationship is a lot of work. I've been in relationships where I was always stressing out. Any little thing had me worried about the state of our relationship, etcetera. With my current SO, I have no worries. Our relationship is so easy! I don't feel like we have to work at our relationship and it is wonderful.

Sent from my iPad mini mini.

 

[jamani78]

Thanks for sharing this video. I really appreciate it as well as the other videos by Joe Amoia. Got some work to do.

 

[PeaceFlow]

I think the ideas that:

a) relationships with the right person should be completely bump free
b) relationships are a lot of work

.. both display black and white thinking and severely underestimate the complexities of human relationships.

I have met many very long term happy couples that went through a bumpy patch at some point and I would never have guessed.

I have met people who have had bump free relationships with the wrong person for them.

And every other variation of course. No work - perfect match. Loads of work - terrible match.

I'm also not sure about what people mean when they say a lot of work sometimes. Some women say this because they are doing a lot of work to keep the relationship going while the man doesn't change. < I don't think that should be seen as the norm for relationships, no.

 

[God_Favor]

They shouldn't be.

 

[londontresses]

I agree with what he said in a way. If you are with the 'wrong' person ie someone that's not compatible or in sync with you, you will need to work at it. I think this happens more often than not.

I don't think this invalidates the relationship or means the couple don't love each other. However with all the compromising required, its way more effort.

 

[CaliiSwagg]

Depending on the person, some relationships require more work than others to stay intact.

 

[Farida]

Relationships can be a lot of work sometimes, but a good one should not be a lot of work all the time.

 

[naija24]

i believe that you have to work hard at everything for it to be successful. relationships are no different.

 

[MizAvalon]

Relationships are work. But whether or not it's hard work or easy work depends on the relationship.

 

[FlowerHair]

At times you have to put in some work.
But it shouldn't be a constant one-sided struggle.

Men are like dogs - sometimes you have to put them in their place so to speak and everything will be fine for a few years. Or rather, you have to assert your own place, to use a nicer language.

 

[MsKinkycurl]

I think a good relationship is like tending to a garden. Consistent work is needed but it shouldn't feel like a constant struggle. After you've been putting in the time and effort you should see your relationship grow and flourish.

Sent from my SCH-I535 using LHCF

 

[Holla]

The definition of "work" varies from person to person. For some "work" may mean making more time to see the person, calling more often, doing date nights, etc. For others, "work" means going through emotional trials, putting up with certain behaviors/thought patterns, etc.

My cuz was talking about "working" with a guy and going through stuff before they decided if they wanted to get married. I quickly nipped that in the bud. Some levels of "work" will not make for a good relationship no matter hard you work or how long you work at it. It's too much and unnecessary.

 

[LivingInPeace]

When I hear about some people's marriages, it does seem like a lot of work. My marriage has never seemed like "work" to me. I made the mistake of telling a friend that and he said, "You would say that" real snarky like. I wanted to say, "***** I cain't help it if you and your wife don't talk or sleep in the same bed!" Anyway, I guess it's work for some and not for others.