do all women in their 40s and up

[Lilmama1011]

Refer to their man as their friend? I hear a lot of older black women do that and coming to find out it's their bf. But they usually say friend with a smile. Why not say bf?
The gf thing use to throw me off too lol. I thought most of them was gay lol but they really mean a friend that's a girl

 

[LiftedUp]

This may sound strange but it's only within the past 3 years or so I've interacted with persons who are aged 40+ with partners who aren't their spouses. So, this "friend" thing threw me completely off. I took me a while to equate "my mother's friend" to "my mother's man".

 

[january noir]

I usually refer to my SO as my boyfriend or sometimes I use "companion."
My "man" sounds so rough and unrefined.

 

[LiftedUp]

I usually refer to my SO as my boyfriend or sometimes I use "companion."
My "man" sounds so rough and unrefined.

I think "significant other" sounds good. That's what my god sister's mother uses and it gets the point across quite nicely

 

[PeaceFlow]

I usually refer to my SO as my boyfriend or sometimes I use "companion."
My "man" sounds so rough and unrefined.

How about my lover

 

[Lilmama1011]

How about my lover

Lover sounds like tmi

 

[DarkJoy]

I just say BF.

Many mature women say bf sounds immature.

Idgaf. Sayin bf leaves no room for this type of confusion.

 

[janiebaby]

I think it's taking out the "boy" or "girl" part. I've always hated the "friend" term since I was a child but I guess this may be why they use the term at all.

 

[Fine 4s]

This is [insert name] is my preference.

 

[Lilmama1011]

I just say BF.

Many mature women say bf sounds immature.

Idgaf. Sayin bf leaves no room for this type of confusion.

I agree 100%

 

[danniegirl]

boyfriend just sounds so childish

I personally like refer to everyone by name not title

 

[january noir]

How about my lover

My aunts and uncles would be mortified!
Lover conjures up images of fast women.

 

[Lilmama1011]

boyfriend just sounds so childish

I personally like refer to everyone by name not title

It really does. But I rather get to the point. No guessing and people wondering "who is jake?"

 

[bluediamond0829]

Im not 40+ but I use the term friend for my special little friend(wink wink). But once I do have a man--he will just be called my SO or boyfriend.

 

[DarkJoy]

It really does. But I rather get to the point. No guessing and people wondering "who is jake?"

Right?

And other PC terms like significant other (that is just too many syllables to say errtime), SO, and partner just sound kind of cold and clinical to me.

Maybe I'm just ghetto and childish but boyfriend or my man sums it up real quick and to the point

 

[ambergirl]

My guy. ....

 

[faithVA]

I don't like the term boyfriend. I don't mind keeping people confused I have no term I like. I typically just say, This is [name]. And leave it at that. Let them guess. If he isn't present I do refer to him as friend.

 

[january noir]

My guy. ....

This sounds good!

 

[FlowerHair]

Boyfriend sounds like someone under 25.

I once said "my partner" when I was talking to an American woman and she thought I was gay lol!! The word boyfriend sounds way too childish.

 

[DarkJoy]

My guy. ....

I use this one too! Forgot about that.

 

[Lymegreen]

Boyfriend sounds so childish. When I was dating DH I introduced him as the love of my life! ;--P

 

[lucy]

Im all for no confusion. Call him what you like, but call him something so we all know please. Dont have me asking you to hook me up with your friend, or flirting with him, come to find out thats ur man.

 

[Britt]

Boyfriend sounds like someone under 25.

I once said "my partner" when I was talking to an American woman and she thought I was gay lol!! The word boyfriend sounds way too childish.

Yeah, when I hear partner I think gay lol.

 

[DarkJoy]

Im all for no confusion. Call him what you like, but call him something so we all know please. Dont have me asking you to hook me up with your friend, or flirting with him, come to find out thats ur man.

See this here. Im rather territorial

Rather not have the "nuh uh, girl that's my man" conversation at gatherings.

 

[danniegirl]

It really does. But I rather get to the point. No guessing and people wondering "who is jake?"

Im not 40+ but I use the term friend for my special little friend(wink wink). But once I do have a man--he will just be called my SO or boyfriend.

It really does depend on the setting most of the time i am where everybody knows my name and Jakes too.

This weekend i was the supposedly single "girl" (even though i was the same age as most if not older) at a "family" event my Jake was late.

i had grown women 35+ and 40++ grabbing on to there husbands and boyfriends saying the words husbands and boyfriend like 50-11 times. The few women that already knew me gave me a wink, a nod and nudge cause they knew what was up and so did I.


When jake arrived he was just jake no fawning over him, no need for added introductions or additional titles. i dont find it to be reassuring or necessary i find it to be a nuisance if people dont know we are together then were doing something wrong and i just cant be like the women that refuse to work out ever.

 

[Seraphina]

I just say BF.

Many mature women say bf sounds immature.

Idgaf. Sayin bf leaves no room for this type of confusion.

My mother thinks it sounds immature, too. When she was dating my step dad she called him "the man in my life."

 

[GoldenRule]

I always just introduce him by name. As for what he is to me...that's not really anybody's business IMO...lol! If I am amongst family & friends, I will say he's "my boo" or "my dude" but I leave everyone else wondering.

 

[ladysaraii]

It's funny that everyone thinks boyfriend is immature, I don't think it is, but maybe just because of the boy part.

I'll stick with that, it works for me

 

[ThickHair]

Family, friends and LHCF, my honey. To others, his given name.

 

[FelaShrine]

because after 35 it sounds ridiculous. SO is more than suffice.