Contemplating going natural

[ronakajones]

I am really considering it. I look through fotki albums and see beautiful natural heads that are thriving. I'm so sick and tired of my overprocessed, brittle, damaged, breaking, shedding hair that seems to break more that it grows. I use a relaxer out of sheer conveinence, but I could press or flat iron and get the same result. My hair is also getting thinner. I have went natural several times in the past, but never stuck with it. I think I want to try again. Now that I have all this information and other women to help, I think it would be easier. The transitioning phase is what was so hard for me, but I'm considering getting some micros and calling it a day. Anyone else been here???

 

[cocoaluv]

I am contemplating the same thing. I dont know if I would be able to transition though. I think I would stretch my perm out to about 3 months and then do a BC and then keep getting braids till it grew out to a length I'd feel comfortable with ( Im too scared to get a weave ).


Im not too worried about all of that but I dont know how to style natural hair so thats whats really stopping me. I dont remember anything about my natural hair other than my mom didnt know what to do with it and made me get a perm....I dont want to end up doing the same thing.

 

[JustKiya]

I've been natural for almost ten years, and just in the last two have I actually learned how to style my natural hair. I actually put in dreadlocs because I literally had no clue HOW to do my hair - and didn't have the initiative to actually try to learn. I've grown a lot, since then.

It's taken a lot of experimentation, and a lot of patience, and a certain level of confidence - but don't let not knowing how to style natural hair now scare you off - just be aware that you will have to learn, and with all things new, there will be a learning curve. Welcome the curve, and you'll do fine.

 

[cocoaluv]

I've been natural for almost ten years, and just in the last two have I actually learned how to style my natural hair. I actually put in dreadlocs because I literally had no clue HOW to do my hair - and didn't have the initiative to actually try to learn. I've grown a lot, since then.

It's taken a lot of experimentation, and a lot of patience, and a certain level of confidence - but don't let not knowing how to style natural hair now scare you off - just be aware that you will have to learn, and with all things new, there will be a learning curve. Welcome the curve, and you'll do fine.

Thanks. When I told my mom I was thinking of going natural she said "oh your getting dreads". I told her no and she just looked at me like well what are u going to do with your hair then? I will have to learn and do a lot of experimenting

 

[Irresistible]

Go ahead and try going natural again! if your not happy with your hair relaxed, why not? yeah you just gotta get through the transition but its all good! I wouldnt suggest Micros though, I think they are pretty risky for problems later with hair loss.

 

[Nola Darling]

I've been natural for almost ten years, and just in the last two have I actually learned how to style my natural hair.

Me too! Going natural dosen't solve all problems IMO. You have to learn how to keep it healthy and nice just like you would with a relaxer. The main advantage of being natural is that you don't HAVE to depend on relaxing every x weeks. And you don't have to worry about chemical burn either. Otherwise everything else is the same care wise.

 

[Nola Darling]

Go ahead and try going natural again! if your not happy with your hair relaxed, why not? yeah you just gotta get through the transition but its all good! I wouldnt suggest Micros though, I think they are pretty risky for problems later with hair loss.

I don't agree. I transitioned in micros way back in 99 and my hair was just fine. You just have to be patient when taking them out. That and don't get them too tight.

 

[MD_Lady]

I am really considering it. I look through fotki albums and see beautiful natural heads that are thriving. I'm so sick and tired of my overprocessed, brittle, damaged, breaking, shedding hair that seems to break more that it grows. I use a relaxer out of sheer conveinence, but I could press or flat iron and get the same result. My hair is also getting thinner. I have went natural several times in the past, but never stuck with it. I think I want to try again. Now that I have all this information and other women to help, I think it would be easier. The transitioning phase is what was so hard for me, but I'm considering getting some micros and calling it a day. Anyone else been here???

I've been going back and forth over the past few months myself. Even though I've seen a lot of beautiful natural hair on this forum, I keep reminding myself that it might not be a cure all for me. For me, the decision to keep a relaxer has to do with convenience and styling versatilty.

 

[berry87]

Me too! Going natural dosen't solve all problems IMO. You have to learn how to keep it healthy and nice just like you would with a relaxer. The main advantage of being natural is that you don't HAVE to depend on relaxing every x weeks. And you don't have to worry about chemical burn either. Otherwise everything else is the same care wise.

ITA!

 

[Mook's hair]

Please be careful with those micros. Too many ladies have been having their edges destroyed by micros recently. Don't let it happen to you.

Good luck with your decision.

 

[Nice & Wavy]

OP, there are many ladies on the forum whose hair is thriving while being relaxed. Why don't you pm a few of them that are successful (Supergirl relaxes and look at her hair) and ask for some help with your hair.

If then you still feel the same way, then I say try the natural way.

HTH

 

[ronakajones]

Thank you for your input ladies. Its funny that I went into the bank on my lunch break and a girl I see all the time was working. She had micros and they were nice. I asked her about her hair and she always has it in nice different styles and she said her hair is natural and has been for about 2 years. She gave me a lot of info on what she does and that she bought the chi flat iron and it gets her natural hair straight. I hear what some ladies are saying about the only difference with the relaxer is natural is keeping up with touchups and maintenance, but I disagree. When I get newgrowth, it grows out so healthy, thick and strong. But as soon a I get my touchup, my hair is back to being thin, and weak and brittle. I just feel like a relaxer may not be for my texture hair. I try to alternate protein, moisture and all the other healthy practices, but my hair still sheds like crazy, breaks easily and is thin and brittle. I will stretch my relaxer out and see what my mind tells me to do after a few months.

 

[Nice & Wavy]

Maybe you are using the wrong type of relaxer for your hairtype. That is possible. I'm not trying to convince you not to go natural (I'm natural myself) but I'm just saying that the grass isn't always greener on the other side and you really have to be mentally ready for it...trust me.

I just want to help a sister out...I hoped I helped a little bit

Thank you for your input ladies. Its funny that I went into the bank on my lunch break and a girl I see all the time was working. She had micros and they were nice. I asked her about her hair and she always has it in nice different styles and she said her hair is natural and has been for about 2 years. She gave me a lot of info on what she does and that she bought the chi flat iron and it gets her natural hair straight. I hear what some ladies are saying about the only difference with the relaxer is natural is keeping up with touchups and maintenance, but I disagree. When I get newgrowth, it grows out so healthy, thick and strong. But as soon a I get my touchup, my hair is back to being thin, and weak and brittle. I just feel like a relaxer may not be for my texture hair. I try to alternate protein, moisture and all the other healthy practices, but my hair still sheds like crazy, breaks easily and is thin and brittle. I will stretch my relaxer out and see what my mind tells me to do after a few months.

 

[blkbeauty]

Me too! Going natural dosen't solve all problems IMO. You have to learn how to keep it healthy and nice just like you would with a relaxer. The main advantage of being natural is that you don't HAVE to depend on relaxing every x weeks. And you don't have to worry about chemical burn either. Otherwise everything else is the same care wise.

ITA! OP, please listen to this post. Going natural DOES NOT solves all problems. You have to learn how to take care of your hair regardless. Remember being natural is just a style. Both have its pros and cons. It depends on the person, their knowledge and techniques of knowing how to handle their own hair whether relax or natuall.

I've experience breakage being both relaxed and natural. I will not go back to a relaxer only because of like the "look" of natual hair more and it being so versatile.

 

[Nice & Wavy]

ITA! OP, please listen to this post. Going natural DOES NOT solves all problems. You have to learn how to take care of your hair regardless. Remember being natural is just a style. Both have its pros and cons. It depends on the person, their knowledge and techniques of knowing how to handle their own hair whether relax or natuall.

I've experience breakage being both relaxed and natural. I will not go back to a relaxer only because of like the "look" of natual hair more and it being so versatile.

Great post

 

[BrooklynSouth]

I am really considering it. I look through fotki albums and see beautiful natural heads that are thriving. I'm so sick and tired of my overprocessed, brittle, damaged, breaking, shedding hair that seems to break more that it grows. I use a relaxer out of sheer conveinence, but I could press or flat iron and get the same result. My hair is also getting thinner. I have went natural several times in the past, but never stuck with it. I think I want to try again. Now that I have all this information and other women to help, I think it would be easier. The transitioning phase is what was so hard for me, but I'm considering getting some micros and calling it a day. Anyone else been here???

I have decided to stop counting how many weeks post touchup and just focus on my hair. I stopped counting at week 14 because I was too anxious about the word TRANSITIONING; "what now for this week, what now"? I felt like a prisoner when it was retouch time...didn't want to go but had to ease the peas......I now love my peasy hair!

 

[RegaLady]

I understand what you mean! I have pretty limp hair when I relaxed, which is why I always kept it short. It looked fuller that way. If I grew it out and had a relaxer it would look like long strands on my head. It's just the way my hair is. When the NG came in, it was a struggle, but it was pretty and thicker. When I touched it up, it went back flat and lifeless. I have learned with me, when in doubt, DO NOT relax. I would only do it if I were 100% sure.

 

[ronakajones]

I understand what you mean! I have pretty limp hair when I relaxed, which is why I always kept it short. It looked fuller that way. If I grew it out and had a relaxer it would look like long strands on my head. It's just the way my hair is. When the NG came in, it was a struggle, but it was pretty and thicker. When I touched it up, it went back flat and lifeless. I have learned with me, when in doubt, DO NOT relax. I would only do it if I were 100% sure.

So are you natural now? Do you have any pics?

 

[TaraDyan]

I am really considering it. I look through fotki albums and see beautiful natural heads that are thriving. I'm so sick and tired of my overprocessed, brittle, damaged, breaking, shedding hair that seems to break more that it grows. I use a relaxer out of sheer conveinence, but I could press or flat iron and get the same result. My hair is also getting thinner. I have went natural several times in the past, but never stuck with it. I think I want to try again. Now that I have all this information and other women to help, I think it would be easier. The transitioning phase is what was so hard for me, but I'm considering getting some micros and calling it a day. Anyone else been here???

Yes, yes, and yesssssssssssss ... I totally feel your pain. My relaxed hair was fine and thinning more and more every year it seemed. My last relaxer was March 2007 and I haven't looked back since (I'm 16 months post). I was just looking at a pic of my relaxed hair the other day and remarking about how thin it was. For me ... relaxers are a thing of the past.

But I definitely agree with Miss Fadu ... going natural does not mean it will automatically be easier. I know for me, I just traded in one set of issues for a whole other set (Sahara dryness, mondo shrinkage, hair curling up on itself and knotting up, etc). They both have their pros and cons and you just have to weigh them and see what's best for you in the long run.

But if you do decide to have another go at it, at least you have LHCF in your corner.

 

[1QTPie]

Maybe you are using the wrong type of relaxer for your hairtype. That is possible. I'm not trying to convince you not to go natural (I'm natural myself) but I'm just saying that the grass isn't always greener on the other side and you really have to be mentally ready for it...trust me.

I just want to help a sister out...I hoped I helped a little bit

As a nappy advocate. I have to agree. You're probably not using a relaxer that your hair can handle.

 

[ronakajones]

As a nappy advocate. I have to agree. You're probably not using a relaxer that your hair can handle.

How do I know? I need suggestions.

 

[lexi84]

I'm contemplating the same....my natural texture intrigues me. The past couple of days I've been in the mirror looking at it and I love how it feels, how it curls around, and how strong it is; but thats just one inch of natural hair. So technically I dont know what it looks like. Its the only part of my body that I'm not familiar with and i dont like that.

 

[Mena]

lol i just went back to being relaxed after being natural 6 years ...well see how it goes

 

[santwon]

I wish you luck. I'd also like to know what DOES work for your hair? Because there are people who go natural to run away from relaxer issues and feel that that is the only way their hair can grow...which isn't true.

 

[Mena]

I wish you luck. I'd also like to know what DOES work for your hair? Because there are people who go natural to run away from relaxer issues and feel that that is the only way their hair can grow...which isn't true.

It isnt true at all. When I was natural, cowashing helped greatly. My hair grew so much. The problem I had was I started getting all these tangles and knots in my hair from hair shedding. Detangling was terrible even though my hair grew A LOT. I put in a relaxer(it is not bone straight though). I still have that natural look with the waves and coils minus the nasty tangling. Also, I am wearing a weave as a protective style and I got tired of applying heat.

 

[Zenobia61]

lol i just went back to being relaxed after being natural 6 years ...well see how it goes

What are some of the reasons you relaxed???

 

[TemiLnd]

I am currently transitioning after getting frustrated with those that were relaxing my hair. It is a tough road but i use braids, twist, braid & twist out and cornrows. That way i dont really have to worry abot my hair.
Determine what is important to you and then stick with it...

 

[jamaraa]

Ok..here goes. No matter what state you choose for your hair, you will have to learn to take care of it. Each state...relaxed, texulaxed/texturized, natural unstraightened, natural straightened, natural w/ some heat every so, braids, twists, 'fros, and dreads all have their requirements for optimal appearance and growth. Since you've tried BOTH natural and relaxed several times, it's evident you've not learned to care for you hair AT ALL...in ANY state. You seem to dislike it thin, but aren't too keen on it thick either. Maybe a textulaxer is an option?

As you are relaxed, let's work from there. Do you go to a hairdresser? What products do they use? That's your 1st big clue. As other posters have said, maybe you need a different kind of relaxer. You need to find out if it's a lye or no lye and what brand. Switching products and/or hairdressers have helped many get better results and the hair they want. "Stretching" time between relaxer might be an option to see if "new growth" is up your alley.

Then there's the middle ground...the texturizer or textulaxer.

If you want to go natural...how natural? there are many approaches...everything from cutting it off and starting fresh, to sisterlocks, braids, twists, even the good ol' fashioned press n curl.

The only real caution I give is on braids...micros and cornrows. Your hair and scalp might be too weak and easily irritated to handle them for long stretches. Many times they are put in too tight and end up pulling out the hair at the root. Tightness can sneak up on you, so be mindful of that using braids to transition.

 

[tocktick]

* i would advise against micros

* don't put so much stress on yourself. you really do have plenty of time to come to a decision about your hair. if you don't relax for a while, you could eventually bc or fall back in love with relaxed hair and gain plenty of length from stretching. think of this more as a "break" instead of a transition at this stage.

* if you want to remain relaxed, there are so many tips and masses of information on how to turn your hair around. some of the issues you have now (dry, shedding etc) can occur when you're natural too.

*i also went natural for healthy hair but i believe now that there must be more behind your decision. you've not only got to love natural hair on others but know you'll be able to love it on you too or else you may struggle to remain natural.

*if you do come over to the natural side , there are many transition support threads, tips on how to take care of your natural hair and there will be so much support if you feel like you are having trouble remaining natural.

*check out pinkskates and chicoro as examples of long-haired naturals who straighten regularly. they are an inspiration for people like you who plan to press frequently.

* keep in mind that at some points whilst being natural, you will probably have to take breaks from straightening in order to keep your hair hair healthy and strong.

hth

 

[jojo70]

Help! I had my last relaxer in September "06 but like an idiot I continued to relax the front edges ( my last perm in the front was probably December '06). In May of '07 my hair was shedding really bad so I had to cut it into a layered choppy bob. The back of my hair is a little past my neck and my sides are jaw length. My ends are still relaxed so when I blow it out it looks straight but it feels really thin and flimsy. Is this a usual process? Should it be taking this long? Do you guys have any suggestions?