Co-worker mad-what do you think?

[MissYocairis]

What? No, you didn't do anything wrong. Why in the world would she think it was okay to do that without asking? AFAIC, it's just basic manners to ask before putting your hands in someone else's hair. We are not talking about a family member here or a really good friend (and truth be told I tolerate that but don't like it). This is some new chick at your place of work! Yeah, it's best to be polite. But I DEFINITELY would have said something to her, too.

ITA!!! It gives me the CREEPS that she actually FELT through your hair all the way up to the scalp. What if she'd snapped a hair? What if she had snags in her nails and a hair got caught? I don't like people touching my hair unless it is the SO! You were right! (don't forget to do that white girl toss for good measure)

 

[kitkat3ny]

Of course you were justified for saying that. . She should've expected that reaction, since she decided to be so bold!

Well, it's here loss because she actually needs you to train her.

 

[~*~ShopAholic~*~]

I think you handled it well, without overreacting but letting her know that it's not okay to just run you hands all through someones hair. Plus, I don't understand why pple can't separate business from friendship, let's not even talk about how long you have know her, not long at all and surely not long enough for her to even think it was okay to be all up in your hair.
Weather she was hating or not she definately over stepped her boundaries and needed to be checked.

 

[beyondcute]

Why does she have to be a hater? EVERYONE on here admires healthy long hair. Our insticts tell us to touch beautiful things. I know mines do. Im constantky touching flowers or fabric or anything that appears to have a nice txture and is allurng to my eyes. Its not that people are being rude or "hating," Jeez. I dont think we shoudl classify everyone as a hater. Hell she got a fresh perm her roots were probably laid. Sista mighta been wondering what kinda perm gets your hair this silky. We need to be a sisterhood and snapping at each other over small stuff just divides us. Liek someone else said it seem slike the long haired women egg on the silent divide and 1 too many experiences like that make women with shorter hair afraid to ask for help. If it were me Id feel as if I was shunned by a hair snob. Id feel insulted. Id feel hurt and dissed by a "thought she was a" friend. Hair is somethign so small a thing to be upset about especially if it comes in between a budding friednship... (off to make a spin off )

 

[Candiss]

This woman is grown. It is not your job to accommodate her ignorance and bad manners. All due respect to those who just "grew up that way" but we ain't talking about two year olds who need to be shown patience until they learn how to act. We are talking about a woman who is intelligent enough to be employed. If she was offended because she thinks you offended her home training, then GOOD. Because, the unfortunate woman doesn't seem to have any. If your response came off as "uppity" then good, now she knows to keep her hands to herself. Instinct may urge you to want to reach out an touch. But adults need to control their instincts and let their common sense and respect for other's personal space kick in and KEEP THEIR HANDS TO THEMSELVES! If it's not that serious for some, then more power to them. But that's them, it ain't me.

 

[~*~ShopAholic~*~]

I understand where you are comming from and I wouldn't say she was hating but was definately out of line and the OP didnt' sound as if tshe snapped on the women like most would. But as a seamstress I love fabrics but will admire it from a distance you would never catch me in a million yrs walking up to someone and start feeling on their clothes, , they would think I'm nut's and probably hit me upside the head w/something. What I would do and always do weather it's a nice head of hair, or nice clothing/shoe or whatever is complement the women wearing it, that way they don't have to wonder why I'm eyeballing them through my face veil, since my eyes speak a million words.

Why does she have to be a hater? EVERYONE on here admires healthy long hair. Our insticts tell us to touch beautiful things. I know mines do. Im constantky touching flowers or fabric or anything that appears to have a nice txture and is allurng to my eyes. Its not that people are being rude or "hating," Jeez. I dont think we shoudl classify everyone as a hater. Hell she got a fresh perm her roots were probably laid. Sista mighta been wondering what kinda perm gets your hair this silky. We need to be a sisterhood and snapping at each other over small stuff just divides us. Liek someone else said it seem slike the long haired women egg on the silent divide and 1 too many experiences like that make women with shorter hair afraid to ask for help. If it were me Id feel as if I was shunned by a hair snob. Id feel insulted. Id feel hurt and dissed by a "thought she was a" friend. Hair is somethign so small a thing to be upset about especially if it comes in between a budding friednship... (off to make a spin off )

 

[Cayenne0622]

I hate hate hate when people do that!! Why do they think it is okay to put their hands in someone else's hair! PLUS, everyone knows that black women are particular about our hair and we usually don't want anyone messing with it. I have a friend who does that whenever my hair is looking cute. She's not weave checkin.. But she acts like she has to touch it when it looks nice. It ticks me off! Why do you need to touch it? I don't get it.

 

[MonaLisa]

YOU DID THE RIGHT THING!!!!!!
The nerve of some people!!!! I don't care how close she thought you guys were doing a weave check was totally out of order. I don't understand how some people are so bold to do things like that. If she would have asked then that's different story but to just take it upon herself to have her hands (god forbid she had a hang nail or something that would snag and pull on your hair) all up in your hair and at the roots too!!!!
Sorry but my initial reaction would have been to slap that heifer's hand and ask her what the hell she doing? But since you were at work and all you handled yourself pretty well.



I actually did this to someone recently....it was like my hand reacted faster than my brain....

My mama don't even put her hand up in or near my head....she can..or my lover ...but no one else can...I don't like it. I just don't...and there's nothing wrong with being protective of one's personal space. Something about that act -- I don't know...I feel like it's an intimate thing to have someone in your hair/your scalp ...aside from a stylist washing/touching up one's hair. TJM...

 

[beyondcute]

But yall this wasnt a total strange this was a new person building a friendship. I just think the reaction couldve been a bit nicer. And who's to say which home training is right? People's customs are different. I think itcould have been handled a bit nicer. If it really bothered me (doesnt really unless the person is unknown to me) Id just say "I really hate it when people do that." in the nicest way possible rather than to insult the persons upbringing.

 

[KeyahGirl]

to Keyah girl



this is what i based my repsonse off of, sure i have some of my own experiances that play a part in it, but when she mentioned this i seriously doubt she would run her fingers that far into her hair for no reason. now with my close friends i have no problem with them running thier fingers thro my hair or a light tug or so, but they way she discribed it was more than that she was up in her roots while at the same time saying i didnt think your hair was this long.

That's fine. It's just that without any additional information, we can't just unilaterally say that this woman was hating on Cheche's length. For all we know, the woman was raised in a family where this sort of thing is common. Also, I've been the "new girl" plenty of times to know that you tend to glom onto the first person who shows you some kindness. Cheche herself said "she took [this girl] under her wing." That might have indicated to the woman that she and Cheche shared a relationship that did not exist. The woman might have been talking mess about the other coworkers out of anger that THEY weren't making her feel welcome in her new environment. Who knows?

why would she be shatterd at her hair being longer than hers?? shoudlnt she just be happy that she can grow her hair out like that and because its healthy. I dont assume women are hating on my hair, but if a women a barely know has her hands on my roots i would def get suspecious. why not just ask her if she has weave if you wanna know and then take her answer as truth. it jus seems like this co-worker went about it the wrong way and felt salty after she was called out.

But see, you're saying one thing and then contradicting yourself in the next sentence. Who says this woman ISN'T happy with how her own hair looks? Just because someone puts their hands in your hair doesn't automatically mean they are coveting what you had. And I find it interesting that Cheche herself did not go there in her original post. All she said was that she had her hair in a bun and that the woman touched her hair and commented that it didn't look as long as it was in that bun. I suspect that even if this woman HADN'T touched Cheche's hair but still said the same thing about her hair not seeming that long, people on this board would still be calling her a hater, and that's just sad. I hate to see black women tearing each other down over dumb stuff. Not everyone covets long hair.

N.B.: I am not suggesting that Cheche had no right to "check" this woman. If you don't want people up in your hair, that's your right. My issue with the tone of this thread is that people are branding this woman a hater when the circumstances don't seem to warrant it, and in lurking, I have seen that a LOT on this board. Like, I've seen people write, "I wore my hair out ... and the short-haired nappy mailroom girl rolled her eyes at me." Or ... "I wore my hair out and the ***** on my floor let the elevator close in my face." And then there's a chorus of "She was jus jellus!!!" It just saddens me. Hair length is an individual choice. We're not in some sort of Borg collective, and it sometimes seems like EVERY black woman with long hair seems to think EVERY black woman who doesn't have it wants it, and hates the people who do.

 

[Denim And Leather]

Ladies,
I just have to vent, for the last two weeks I have been training a new lady at my job, and just basically took her under my wing. Well I had been without a perm for about 12 weeks and have been wearing a bun, and finally got a perm over the weekend, so she had never seen it down. Yesterday morning she came up behind me at my desk in front of everyone and started feeling the ends of my hair, I was taken off guard but didnt trip, but then she started putting her hands all in the back of my hair down to the scalp.

My hair is about bra strap length, so I figure she musta thought it was a weave. I then told her "dont you know its rude to put your hands all in another persons head without being asked to". She stated to me that it didnt look that long when I had it up-I wanted to say duh! I havent had a perm in 12 weeks what do you expect. Do you know she has not spoken to me since, is that triflin or what. All day she did every thing she could to avoid asking me questions. Was I wrong for saying that to her? I feel justified cause I feel she made ignorant assumptions about my hair. Plus, she dont know me like that.

No, you had every right to set her straight! If it were me, I would've told her the same thing. I think she's avoiding you because now she feels embarrassed and know what she did was wrong (let's hope). She had a lot of nerve to actually feel your hair to see if you were wearing a weave! People have a lot of nerve! And to actually make a comment about your hair didn't look that long before....well that's just downright ignorant.

 

[karolmel]

I never have anyone do this to me! I work alone and my vendors and tenants never touch my hair!!!! LOL!!!! Creepy! I do get responses when I have it down. I especially love it when my sister, who has beautifully long hair, gets really quiet when I have my hair down. :fallenang

Everyone else just says, "Oh, I've never seen your hair down before."

 

[Denim And Leather]

Um ... I didn't get ANY thing like that from the OP's post. And to be honest, I think that more of the respondents to this post are claiming "haterism" than the OP had.

There's two things I see here: We have two women, one of whom is pretty new to the work environment, the other who is training the first woman. As misscrystal mentioned, it's possible that Cheche's coworker assumed a deeper relationship than actually exists (or existed). In the world of Cheche's coworker, maybe she goes around regularly feeling in her "friends'" hair. I don't know. The thing is, though, neither do you, and you and others seem to be projecting your OWN experiences onto this situation. I'm sorry that folks have hated on your hair in the past, but just because it happened to YOU doesn't mean that it happened here.



And it really distresses me how quick some women are to scream "hater" at the first long look from a "shorter haired" woman. My hair is probably much shorter than yours. I always admire women with longer hair than mine, but I have a genetic issue with my teeth that makes my smile not so good. So I don't smile. Some people may think I'm "looking too hard" at their hair when I'm just thinking, "Dang! Sis is working it out." So now I just don't bother - and it's sad. I think Cheche's coworker is more upset that her illusions that she and Cheche were close were shattered more than about how many inches longer than hers Cheche's hair may or may not be.

Unfortunately, black women have an extensive history of hating on each other because of hair texture/hair length. You may be the exception, but it is definitely not unreasonable to assume that there definitely some hair hating going on in this situation.

 

[Qetesh]

That's fine. It's just that without any additional information, we can't just unilaterally say that this woman was hating on Cheche's length. For all we know, the woman was raised in a family where this sort of thing is common. Also, I've been the "new girl" plenty of times to know that you tend to glom onto the first person who shows you some kindness. Cheche herself said "she took [this girl] under her wing." That might have indicated to the woman that she and Cheche shared a relationship that did not exist. The woman might have been talking mess about the other coworkers out of anger that THEY weren't making her feel welcome in her new environment. Who knows?




But see, you're saying one thing and then contradicting yourself in the next sentence. Who says this woman ISN'T happy with how her own hair looks? Just because someone puts their hands in your hair doesn't automatically mean they are coveting what you had. And I find it interesting that Cheche herself did not go there in her original post. All she said was that she had her hair in a bun and that the woman touched her hair and commented that it didn't look as long as it was in that bun. I suspect that even if this woman HADN'T touched Cheche's hair but still said the same thing about her hair not seeming that long, people on this board would still be calling her a hater, and that's just sad. I hate to see black women tearing each other down over dumb stuff. Not everyone covets long hair.

N.B.: I am not suggesting that Cheche had no right to "check" this woman. If you don't want people up in your hair, that's your right. My issue with the tone of this thread is that people are branding this woman a hater when the circumstances don't seem to warrant it, and in lurking, I have seen that a LOT on this board. Like, I've seen people write, "I wore my hair out ... and the short-haired nappy mailroom girl rolled her eyes at me." Or ... "I wore my hair out and the ***** on my floor let the elevator close in my face." And then there's a chorus of "She was jus jellus!!!" It just saddens me. Hair length is an individual choice. We're not in some sort of Borg collective, and it sometimes seems like EVERY black woman with long hair seems to think EVERY black woman who doesn't have it wants it, and hates the people who do.

i understand your point and some of it has to do with the fact that sometimes the girl with long hair is considered an outcast in some ways. And people sometimes ASSUME they think they are the ish and stuck up when in reality they are not. its like we are labled as stuck up because our hair in some cases.

i have some hair issues so occationally I want short hair,... yes i do. i have actually cut my hair to shoulderlength once and gotten flack about it from my man. so i bought some short wigs.... i know this sounds INSANE but i seriously wanted short hair, and when i wear my wig people who know how long my hair is roll thier eyes at me like i must be crazy to cover my long hair up. my point is girls with long hair dont always think everyone wants it, in fact i sometimes kinda want some of the shorter styles , i decided a wig would work better since after a month or so i want my hair back and if i cut it all off its not going to grow back that quick.

 

[misscrystal]

If she really was checking for weave, then I may have been pretty miffed with her as well.

But I think too many of us are jumping to this 'hateration' conclusion. I used to get petted all the time when my hair was longer, and I HATED it. But I've caught myself touching other friends' hair when it was looking especially silky or nice. Granted, I've never pulled it, or been all up in their scalp, but I'd hope that even my acquantances wouldn't snap at me for just touching it.

Like I said before, sometimes it's a familiarity issue. Maybe she feels more familiar with you than you do with her?

 

[Caramela]

As far as her respecting your personal space and overstepping her professional boundaries, she has no reason to be mad.

Personally, I think your choice of words could have been more tactful. When you say "don't you know what you're doing is wrong/bad/rude/dumb/etc.." you may have hurt her feelings. Because, truth be told and confirmed by some of the posts in the thread, she may not really know. Rude can be subjective. Some find it rude while others may not

I don't know what the (professional or personal) relationship is worth to you, but you may want to revisit the encounter with her, apologize for your word choice but stand firm that you don't like when people touch any part of your person without being asked to do so.

 

[Alee]

Ladies,
I just have to vent, for the last two weeks I have been training a new lady at my job, and just basically took her under my wing. Well I had been without a perm for about 12 weeks and have been wearing a bun, and finally got a perm over the weekend, so she had never seen it down. Yesterday morning she came up behind me at my desk in front of everyone and started feeling the ends of my hair, I was taken off guard but didnt trip, but then she started putting her hands all in the back of my hair down to the scalp.

My hair is about bra strap length, so I figure she musta thought it was a weave. I then told her "dont you know its rude to put your hands all in another persons head without being asked to". She stated to me that it didnt look that long when I had it up-I wanted to say duh! I havent had a perm in 12 weeks what do you expect. Do you know she has not spoken to me since, is that triflin or what. All day she did every thing she could to avoid asking me questions. Was I wrong for saying that to her? I feel justified cause I feel she made ignorant assumptions about my hair. Plus, she dont know me like that.

Once she made the comment on the difference in lenght it was clear what her hand was doing up there. Im sorry I know we like to give people the benefit of the doubt but she was HATING.

 

[sareca]

Wow, cool thread. I love hearing multiple perspectives, but I'm afraid I'm in the majority here. That girl is hatin'.

 

[Jas123]

Ok I understand someone being touchy feely..but 1st you're in professional environment..that must be taken into consideration..2ndly Cheche stated they were co-workers, not good friends, so the touchy feely stuff is something the co-worker just does not have a right to and 3rdly when is it ok for people (not including family/friends) to just come up and touch your person..whether it's your hair or your breast w/o permission..it's not ok..point-blank..there is no excuse..seriously, how hard is to ask a person "your hair is so pretty can I feel it"? I think people just touch a person's hair w/o permission because they are checking to see if it a weave and they're afraid if they ask you 1st you will say "NO" and they can't "confirm" for themselves..IMHO

 

[deltagyrl]

N.B.: I am not suggesting that Cheche had no right to "check" this woman. If you don't want people up in your hair, that's your right. My issue with the tone of this thread is that people are branding this woman a hater when the circumstances don't seem to warrant it, and in lurking, I have seen that a LOT on this board. Like, I've seen people write, "I wore my hair out ... and the short-haired nappy mailroom girl rolled her eyes at me." Or ... "I wore my hair out and the ***** on my floor let the elevator close in my face." And then there's a chorus of "She was jus jellus!!!" It just saddens me. Hair length is an individual choice. We're not in some sort of Borg collective, and it sometimes seems like EVERY black woman with long hair seems to think EVERY black woman who doesn't have it wants it, and hates the people who do.

VERY good point and VERY well said. ITA with the comment about not every woman coveting long hair BUT within every stereotype there is an underlying truth. It's not a stretch to believe that she has some boundary/hatin' issues.
For the record I admire healthy heads of hair in ANY length or style and I've never had the urge to touch anyone's hair, ever.....

 

[Jas123]

Why does she have to be a hater? EVERYONE on here admires healthy long hair. Our insticts tell us to touch beautiful things. I know mines do. Im constantky touching flowers or fabric or anything that appears to have a nice txture and is allurng to my eyes. Its not that people are being rude or "hating," Jeez. I dont think we shoudl classify everyone as a hater. Hell she got a fresh perm her roots were probably laid. Sista mighta been wondering what kinda perm gets your hair this silky. We need to be a sisterhood and snapping at each other over small stuff just divides us. Liek someone else said it seem slike the long haired women egg on the silent divide and 1 too many experiences like that make women with shorter hair afraid to ask for help. If it were me Id feel as if I was shunned by a hair snob. Id feel insulted. Id feel hurt and dissed by a "thought she was a" friend. Hair is somethign so small a thing to be upset about especially if it comes in between a budding friednship... (off to make a spin off )

I agree..but why couldn't she ask 1st?...I'm sorry but with this concept you're opening a whole can of worms..As an adult we are suppose to be able to control our instincts/urges/compulsions....I don't even want to let my mind wonder to what if everyone acted like this...uhh uuh

 

[beyondcute]

I understand all that. We are adults but hey 1 slip up? Come on. No need to snap the ladies head off. I take it as the ultimate compliment. My hair looked so nice they just had to touch it... But then I let them down nicely.

The whole phrase "took her under my wing" had me thinking that they had a budding friendship. I dunno maybe Im reading into it wrong but I still feel liek as sisters we should try to be a little less judgemental and jump to the negative conclusion. Why not ask her "whatcha looking for" in a joking way or my favorite is "be careful you might lose a finger in there" and laugh it off. People usually get the idea that you arent too keen on the whole idea.

And Im not saying everyone should just go around touching things that they shouldnt but geez were human. I will admit my eyes get the best of me sometimes. Im human I just hope when it does happen I dont get snapped at or people judge my upbringing.

 

[sareca]

I agree..but why couldn't she ask 1st?...I'm sorry but with this concept you're opening a whole can of worms..As an adult we are suppose to be able to control our instincts/urges/compulsions....I don't even want to let my mind wonder to what if everyone acted like this...uhh uuh

ITA. When I'm visiting home, I randomly jump on my momma's lap and try to bite her shoulder (um, it's a family thing) but I KNOW that is not appropriate for work. Or anywhere else for that matter.

 

[DAX]

As another poster said, it is never okay to tresspass on a person and touch them without their consent. However, to me, it depends on what is touched that will offend me. For instance, I love fur coats and a couple of years ago, one of my co-workers was admiring my new mink coat. She came up to me and touched it and started oohhhing and ahhhhing at the coat. I was not offended because I have done that to women in my church when they wore their fur coats. Now, as for touching hair or body parts, I would NEVER touch another person unless I knew them very well, especially co-workers; I believe in keeping business and personal separate.

It seems to me that you were shocked that she touched your hair and the way she touched it, going all through your scalp like that. I do believe that she was a little envious of you because of her comment that your hair didn't look like that the other day (sorry if I didn't quote you verbatim, this is a long thread). It seems like she was trying to call you out in front of your co-workers to see if you were wearing a weave and, if you did have a weave, if you would lie about wearing one. What difference does it make if you did have a weave? Why did she feel that need to check your scalp for tracks? Is there a law against wearing a weave in your workplace? Did you make any comments about your hair before the incident that would have lead her to believe that she had to be the hair police and check you for fake hair?

On the job note, I hope that she is competent enough in her job duties after two weeks of training. Does she know the job well enough to perform without your supervision? If not, then her professionalism is very mediocre. You should never have drama at work with co-workers, especially management or persons who have a direct effect on your position. What is wrong with talking about problems in order to iron things out? It seems like if someone is rubbed the wrong way, it has to be the end all of communication and then the silent treatment takes over.

I would be the bigger person and go to her and tell her that you are sorry if you offended her; that you were taken aback at her actions and HER comments about your hair and that you didn't expect that from her. Also let her know that this is the workplace and there is NO room for childish behavior or bad attitudes because you are there to help her and this trivial matter could affect both you and her working relationship. Always be professional and speak with her if she comes to you for help with her job duties. You don't want to let small personal issues affect your professionalism. If she doesn't act adult about the situation after that, then you should just carry on with your life and leave her alone.

 

[Caramela]

I would be the bigger person and go to her and tell her that you are sorry if you offended her; that you were taken aback at her actions and HER comments about your hair and that you didn't expect that from her. Also let her know that this is the workplace and there is NO room for childish behavior or bad attitudes because you are there to help her and this trivial matter could affect both you and her working relationship. Always be professional and speak with her if she comes to you for help with her job duties. You don't want to let small personal issues affect your professionalism. If she doesn't act adult about the situation after that, then you should just carry on with your life and leave her alone.

Great advice.

 

[Jas123]

ITA. When I'm visiting home, I randomly jump on my momma's lap and try to bite her shoulder (um, it's a family thing) but I KNOW that is not appropriate for work. Or anywhere else for that matter.

Exactly..I'm the same way

 

[Starian]

All I'm saying is that OP's response could have been a little nicer. I'm not questionig her right to her personal space. If she doesn't like folks all up in her hair, that's cool. I also said that OP would be the best judge of the woman's character, and since she stated that she's the type to gossip and look folks up and down, then my opinion has changed slightly.

Wouldn't "Please don't do that. I really don't like it when people touch my hair. *quick smile*" be just as effective as "Don't you know it's rude..."? Firm but polite, as opposed to possible rudeness.

You can still assert your right to personal space and have some tact at the same time.

 

[MissYocairis]

As another poster said, it is never okay to tresspass on a person and touch them without their consent. However, to me, it depends on what is touched that will offend me. For instance, I love fur coats and a couple of years ago, one of my co-workers was admiring my new mink coat. She came up to me and touched it and started oohhhing and ahhhhing at the coat. I was not offended because I have done that to women in my church when they wore their fur coats. Now, as for touching hair or body parts, I would NEVER touch another person unless I knew them very well, especially co-workers; I believe in keeping business and personal separate.

It seems to me that you were shocked that she touched your hair and the way she touched it, going all through your scalp like that. I do believe that she was a little envious of you because of her comment that your hair didn't look like that the other day (sorry if I didn't quote you verbatim, this is a long thread). It seems like she was trying to call you out in front of your co-workers to see if you were wearing a weave and, if you did have a weave, if you would lie about wearing one. What difference does it make if you did have a weave? Why did she feel that need to check your scalp for tracks? Is there a law against wearing a weave in your workplace? Did you make any comments about your hair before the incident that would have lead her to believe that she had to be the hair police and check you for fake hair?

On the job note, I hope that she is competent enough in her job duties after two weeks of training. Does she know the job well enough to perform without your supervision? If not, then her professionalism is very mediocre. You should never have drama at work with co-workers, especially management or persons who have a direct effect on your position. What is wrong with talking about problems in order to iron things out? It seems like if someone is rubbed the wrong way, it has to be the end all of communication and then the silent treatment takes over.

I would be the bigger person and go to her and tell her that you are sorry if you offended her; that you were taken aback at her actions and HER comments about your hair and that you didn't expect that from her. Also let her know that this is the workplace and there is NO room for childish behavior or bad attitudes because you are there to help her and this trivial matter could affect both you and her working relationship. Always be professional and speak with her if she comes to you for help with her job duties. You don't want to let small personal issues affect your professionalism. If she doesn't act adult about the situation after that, then you should just carry on with your life and leave her alone.

WHOLE ENTIRE POST IS ON POINT!

 

[Nightingale]

I am touchy feely and on occassion will run my fingers through someones hair, but if its someone I don't know so well I ask. My friends are use to it. I give compliments and stay away from the scalp. That way everyone knows I'm not checking or tracks and just admiring their hair.

 

[sareca]

I am touchy feely and on occassion will run my fingers through someones hair, but if its someone I don't know so well I ask. My friends are use to it. I give compliments and stay away from the scalp. That way everyone knows I'm not checking or tracks and just admiring their hair.

That's what my friends do too. I don't mind one bit.