Can a Woman LEARN to Love a man that treats her well?

My mom tells me this all the time. I think she has a point except she underestimates her initial attraction to my dad. From my pov she didn't learn to love him. He just happened to give her what she was looking for. But I digress. Learning to love someone may work for other people but I'm not sure it does for me. I can grow to respect, admire and care for someone, but if I don't feel emotionally for someone at the outset I don't see it growing to love, no matter how good a man he is. That's not to say love is the only thing necessary in a relationship. There just needs to be a mix.
 
Last edited:
naturalgyrl5199 said:
At first I thought I settled with DH, but as time went by, I realized I had a winner. Even sex the first time was not bad, but there were no sparks. May be it was nervousness. 12 years later the sex is HAWT! Well it didn't take 12 years it may have taken 4-5 times. He is shy, soft spoken, and he was heavier at the time. He has been patient with me and was there for me in my time of need. I guess he kinda grew on me, but at the same time the physical attraction grew quickly because he was (and still is) such a prince charming. He calls me his queen constantly. Now don't get me wrong he is a Taurus and is no pushover, but when the bull comes out, and he is getting on my nerves I look into those big light brown eyes and I melt.

I think attraction is important. But if he is sweet and treats you right, give it time and prayer. Love and attraction CAN GROW. But after a while if there is just NOTHING...you may need to move on and let him treat some other woman as a queen. (something to think about IMO)...
Click to expand...

That's so sweet! *insert heart smiley*
 
I've noticed that the older generation seems to think so. I don't know, my sister broke up with her SO twice in the span of six years and this man treated her like a queen, even going in against his own mother for not being nice to my sister.
 
You def. can learn to love someone. Intially, you may not be physically attracted to them, but once you spend time with them, develop a friendship, if they have other traits/characteristics that you are attracted to, that person will become more appealing. Most women act on emotions and the better this man treats you, the more emotionally connected you are to him.
 
A blog my friend sent to me discussing the same thing. The guy who wrote the blog explains that giving someone a chance; someone who you wouldn't usually go for, gives you time to get to know them. Going after the spark/chemistry straight away is what we usually do and he explains that even though this is good when it comes to attraction those relationships rarely have any longevity to them as the spark usually fizzles out. I can't find the actual post. But here is a link to his blog.
http://www.evanmarckatz.com/blog/why-chasing-attraction-is-a-losing-strategy-in-love/#.T3iErfD2bUg
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top