afraid to ask... (long)

[inthepink]

Just a little background before I get to my actual question...

The reason I have become obsessed with hair and frequent hairboards rather than watch tv or even sleep is because I am forced to! If you didn't see my introductory post, I mentioned how I got a relaxer by Aveda and it made my hair break off at the root. To describe the breakage...I noticed it two months after the relaxer and ironically about a week before I was scheduled to get a touchup of the same relaxer. I tried wearing a ponytail as I do when it was time to wash my hair...only I couldn't get a smooth look. I had hairs sticking up all over the place. Here, there...sometimes that's normal but it seemed like too many. I was about to go on with my day and attribute it to dry hair when I reached to the crown of my head and saw a chunk of short hair...all about 1/2 inch long...in one section. Boy, I freaked out!

oo: (I know it had to be the relaxer b/c I've had relaxers for 18 years and never experienced that sort of thing no matter how dry my hair got.)

I've decided to not relax my hair anymore as a result of this. At the time of this breakage, my hair was probably just a few inches shy of waist length. So, I decided my best chance of retaining my hair and not having to cut it all down to the new growth was to stop relaxing it and stop putting heat on it.

Anyways...now to get to the question...Has anyone else experienced breakage that you can attribute directly to a relaxer? And if so, how did you recover from it? Did the short hairs eventually catch up to the rest of the hair?

My dilemma every day is to make sure that my hair is smooth and that I don't have any "stickies" which is what I call the short pieces of hair. Most days I have luck but somedays I don't and of course, this reminds me of the breakage which I'd like to forget. I honestly don't think I've had more breakage but maybe I'm deluding myself. It's been 2.5 months since I noticed the breakage. Does it just keep on breaking once it starts? I know when I discovered the breakage, my hair and scalp were extremely dry. (I had been using Aveda Sap Moss which the same stylist recommended. I know a lot of people here love Aveda but they have ruined my hair!)

My plan is this...no heat unless I'm getting a trim which I'll do every 2-3 months depending on how I feel about my ends. I'd rather go 3 months to avoid heat for 3 months.

So, there's my question...is all of my hair going to fall out?

Scared...wondering about answer.

 

[cutebajangirl]

Yes, (In June 2001) I have had breakage that I can attribute to a relaxer. The left side of my head broke off to 1/2 inch in parts. I first noticed it three days after the relaxer. I wore my hair as normal for a month, then I went into braids for 6 weeks and then cut my hair to mid neck, (October 2001). Prior to the relxer my hair was 2 inches past my shoulders and fully even and thick. So the length difference wasn't as drastic as it would be for you to cut yours. After that I let my hair grow and kept trimming until it was even. As it was growing it looked like I had layers. So by Sept. 2002 it was even shoulder length again. And I have been growing it out longer since then. I am now very close to bra strap (just had a cut).

 

[sassygirl125]

[ QUOTE ]
Has anyone else experienced breakage that you can attribute directly to a relaxer?

[/ QUOTE ]

I have. I had been relaxing my hair at home for almost three years w/o any problems. I got worried about overlapping my relaxers and went to a salon. I don't really know what happened but my hair broke off.

(She was very evasive on the phone) Luckily

it was only in the crown area and is totally concealed when my hair is in a high ponytail.

[ QUOTE ]
Did the short hairs eventually catch up to the rest of the hair?

[/ QUOTE ]

Girl, I hope so!

I plan to let the healthy parts get to chin length (including shrinkage). I'm going to keep it that length until the damaged part catches up.

[ QUOTE ]
is all of my hair going to fall out?

[/ QUOTE ]

If you haven't seen any breakage in two months, I think you're safe. I think if I (or the stylist) had done something about the breakage immediately, my hair would be in much better shape right now. But by the time I figured out what was happening, it was too late. I did an ApHogee treatment, but the major damage was done. I think the ApHogee saved the rest of my hair, though.

 

[Peachtree]

I've never had any problems from relaxers, so i can't comment there.

I just wanted to say I too agree that you're safe now... i strongly doubt if more hair will break off due to that last relaxer.... if it does break it'll probably b cuz of manipulation or dryness, but u seem to have that part under control.

Best wishes for u. Ur truly an inspiration for those wanna b "transitioners" like myself

 

[adrienne0914]

like peachtree, i've never had a problem with breakage because of a relaxer, but i also think you're safe now. it sounds like you have a good plan of action. consistency is key.

oh yeah, i wanted to recommend a product for the "stickies." what i use when my edges won't lay down is Beyond the Zone Stiff Head:

i get it at Sally's.

 

[Stormy]

Yes! It happened to me too! I had two spots in the crown area broken off in chunks! Half way down the strands! The hair stylist who was relaxing my hair at the time told me it was due to Alopecia, but I know that wasn't true because the same thing happened to my daughter's hair years ago from a Just For Me relaxer kit. (only her breakage wasn't in the crown, but in chunks)Anyway, it didn't come out anymore, but it took a long time to grow back. Actually, it didn't grow back until last year when I started doing my hair myself and this happened the year before that!

What I did is...I didn't use any heat for a few months and stretched out my relaxers. I would wear my hair pulled back into a *fake* bun slicked down, or wear braids. Moisturized a lot and did deep conditioners. So yes your plan sounds right on track. Now...you would never know two chunks of my hair was missing there because it did eventually catch up with the rest of my hair. When I would trim my hair I still did a light trim there too.

btw...I don't like Aveda products and they don't like my hair!

 

[ComfortablyNumb]

Yes this has definitely happened to me which is why I stopped relaxing the hair people have been telling me I shouldn't relax anyway. My hair broke, broke, broke and became horribly thin. I can definitely attrbute this to the relaxers (Motions and Just for Me) since I only got relaxers every 6 months. Every six months I would have incredibly smooth bouncy hair that was also incredibly thin and broken.

To your question: I don't think your hair will fall out. I burnt a huge chunk of hair out the crown of my head with a marcel iron over a year ago that left me with 2 inch hair at the crown. Because it would stick up so bad when I tried to wear my hair down, I tried to curl my hair into submission. When I finally did what you are planning to do (which wasn't until this spring) and leave it alone, those itty bitty hairs are shoulder length.

 

[inthepink]

Thanks everyone for your responses. I guess I just needed reassurance. My short pieces have definitely grown so that is a plus. I will just have to continue on the track that I am and just essentially take care of my hair. Find someone I trust to trim it when I need it. But the advice I've gotten here is way more thorough than anything any hairstylist has told me!
Adrienne, thanks for the "stickie's" product recommendation!

 

[72792]

I agree also. I got a lot of breakage in the past with Revlon and Optimum Relaxers. Motions Oil Relaxer works for me. I think your plan will do the trick because that's what I had to do too and it worked.

 

[Nessa]

Yup tru tru

 

[karezone]

I did. My hair was bra strap length about 7 years ago. Then guess two weeks after my relaxer, I could barely get it in a ponytail. I ended up with cut.

 

[inthepink]

Wow Karezone! I am guessing the breakage I am experiencing isn't that severe b/c I didn't even have breakage for 2 months after the relaxer. Gosh, I hope you were able to recover!

 

[deborah11]

yep, this happened to me 9 monts ago when i got my last relaxer. a section in the back broke off so bad i was almost bald there. it has now grown to 4 inches or a little better. your plan sounds wonderful. for the last 9 months, i have basically left my hair alone and used very little heat. i have roller set a couple of times and blown it dr on cool setting a couple of times. 1x i tried to press the new growth and thought i had damaged my hair; i conditioned and it recovered nicely. so be careful if u decide to use curling iron. stay away from this as much as possible. i think u are safe now since your hair is not currently breaking. just be careful while transitioning. u have beautiful hair. good luck with our transition.

 

[ravenmerlita]

I had my hair break off from a relaxer done in a salon -- I noticed it about four days after the relaxer when I saw there were more hairs in my comb than usual. I reached up to smooth the hair on the top of my head and hairs started coming off on my hands. It was horrible. The hair wasn't neutralized properly and that's what caused the breakage. That was back in December and my hair has grown since then. When it first happened, I would comb other hair that hadn't broken over it and wear it in a pony tail. There were about two weeks when it had grown to almost an inch and it was impossible to stop it from sticking up. Once it got over an inch and a half, it would lay down okay. Now, it has grown back enough to where it seems like I purposely have feathered my hair and cut in bangs.

 

[inthepink]

Deborah, Thanks for the compliment! I am staying away from heat as much as possible.

ravenmerlita, I'm glad your hair grew back. My "stickies" have gotten better as they've gotten longer. They are between 2-3 inches depending on where they are located. (I think the front grows a little slower than the back.)

Gee, it's so scary to have you hair fall out b/c of what someone (who's supposed to be a professional) did to it!

 

[diamondlady]

[ QUOTE ]
Anyways...now to get to the question...Has anyone else experienced breakage that you can attribute directly to a relaxer? And if so, how did you recover from it?

[/ QUOTE ]

I could write a book on this question. I've had problems on three different occasions with three different stylists. One stylist did not rinse the relaxer out well enough in the back and all the back came out. 2 days after the relaxer I had no hair in the back, but wasn't so bad because I could wear my hair down and cover the bald spot. I stopped relaxing for a few years. I went to another stylist and had the same problem. This time was worst, I had bald spots all over my head. Hair came out by the hand full. The stylist said she needed to give me treatments, I ran from her and I had to wear wigs til my hair grew back.

The last stylist that took out my hair left the relaxer in too long. It was burning and I kept calling her but she was trying to order pizza so she kept ignoring me until I told her I was beginning to feel like Malcom X (In the movie when he stuck he his head in the toilet because the chemicals were burning). The sides came out and I had to comb the sides down to hide the bald spots. When I showed her the damage she said, "OH, we left it on too long" I said "WE,? I don't think WE got paid, the person that got paid left it on too long." I ran from her too.

So why do I still relax? It wasn't the relaxer, it was the stylist.

 

[inthepink]

diamondlady,

It's so interesting! I've had my relaxers burn like HELL and would have scabs for days...but even still, my actual hair NEVER came out. I've even relaxed my own hair with no experience and my hair never fell out. That's why I do not understand how someone can consider herself to be a professional and apply something incorrectly to someone's hair. (As a side note: I know someone who went to the same stylist, got the same product, and had the same breakage!)What's funny is that as she worked on my hair, she told me a story about how she had to chop her hair off one time b/c she didn't neutralize it. I probably should have gotten up and gone home at the point.

This has caused me to stop relaxing. The breakage and that my hair was getting too thin which could be an issue of moving to a dry state and possibly relaxing too often (every 2 months when I probably should have done every 3).

When I first found the breakage, I thought I'd just wait 4 months and relax again. But, once I started reading about transitioning, I decided to transition b/c it would probably ensure no more breakage. I am now so glad I made that choice because I am enjoying getting to know my natural hair. Before this happened, I thought I'd ALWAYS relax.

Another huge factor that helped me be even more sure that I would definitely transition was when I went to a new stylist to get a trim. I found the woman by searching the internet for natural hairstylists. Anyhow, she flatironed my hair and it came out as if I had just gotten a fresh relaxer. If only I had known I could get my hair straight without a relaxer, I would have transitioned YEARS ago!

When I decided to transition, I thought I'd trim off an inch every other month or something like that till I trimmed off all of the relaxer. Now, that I found this board, I don't think I'm going to do that. I've the goal of reaching waist length hair for a while now and I think I'm going to keep going towards that. Once I reach that goal, then I may begin trimming off the relaxed ends more aggressively.

Sidenote: I have nothing against relaxers and I do miss some of the manageability of having a fresh one! Some women on this board have beautiful relaxed hair. I wish I knew how to take care of my hair when I was relaxing regularly!

 

[UmSumayyah]

Every time I consider going to a professional, I read another story on this board and decide to just stick to relaxing it myself. It may be inconvenient, it may be a pain, and I may not have mastered it yet, but:
--I don't burn when I do it myself,
--I save money, and
--I keep my hair!

And when I get my technique down pat, I'll have really achieved something and will be independent! Next stop will be learning to trim, although right now I am mostly keeping the ends treated with hairdressing and keeping them tucked into my hair.