Advice for Women in Their 30s

[w332]

Hi Ladies,

I am in my 30s and single but working on my dream job. I wasn't always single though. I married right out of college, but it did not work out. Now I'm in my early 30s, and I know I want my own family one day soon. I want a life partner and cute kids. I know a lot women out there understand this.

But the other thing is that I'm very driven, and I sometimes push myself to do a lot of things at once. I am now planning to start a little business from home, and I have a great idea that I believe will make me a lot of money, but it will take time to develop it~ time I could use focusing on my job and moving up in it, and time I could use looking for a great man to marry and start a family with.

What would you ladies do if you were me? Would you just focus on working and finding a husband or try to start a small business at the same time? Am I just trying to do to much, or do you think I can do it all at once?

 

[foxee]

I'm in my 30s as well, single and working on multiple businesses. I don't see why it has to be an either/or situation. You rarely see men putting parts of their lives on hold to find a wife. Start your business and make sure to leave time for a social life too. Besides, like attracts like so you'll probably end up with a great man who is just as driven and goal oriented as yourself.

 

[w332]

Thanks for your input foxee. You make a good point.

I'd like to hear from older women too who may have more insight to offer.

 

[StarScream35]

This will come from the heart so do understand I'm putting myself on the line in a way. I was always VERY driven with my career. I mean it literally dominated my life. But now that I'm in my 30's and I look back, I wish I had concentrated on finding a husband. I'm convinced dating just gets worse and worse as you get older because people have baggage, past relationships, kids etc. Also people are set in their ways around this age. I can't describe how it feels to be where I want to be in my career and not having a husband or even someone I can call a potential. It's an aching pain that just won't go away. It gets worse around that time of the month. I've tried to quiet it but it aches and aches and aches. Also it pains me to know that I just may have to date down............know what I mean? It's not something I want to do but in some ways you are forced to do so. The quality out there is poor. Perhaps you could try to to do both but if it gets overwhelming, please adjust your priorities. I hope what I have said has been helpful and good luck to you!

 

[w332]

Brighteyes35,

Thank you for your advice, it is very helpful! I know what you mean. My birthday is tomorrow, and I just started to panic/sweat, and my mind kept racing this morning. I couldn't focus on anything. Then, I came and posted here, and I feel calmer. It is scary. The thing is, I was married, and it was supposed to last forever. Then it didn't work out, and now I'm back looking for love again. My ex-husband thinks I will wait for him to finish his terminal degree to reconnect with him, but he's wrong and it's selfish of him because I'm a woman, and I have only a set time to have children while he can have children forever. If he wanted it to work, he should have tried back then when we were still married. I tried hard back then, but he was stubborn....I am still in my early 30s, and I know I have to act now if I want a bright future. Your post makes me more eager than ever to get started on seriously finding the right man.

I have decided to make finding the right man my top priority (along with doing well in my current job). I'll keep the business idea as a side project that keeps me busy while I'm searching for Mr. Right.

 

[lushcoils]

I I don't see why it has to be an either/or situation. You rarely see men putting parts of their lives on hold to find a wife.

Right. And no offense, but I always see bw do this. I always cringe when I hear to see on fb/twitter things like, "I'mma do me. Just doing me. Just focusing on school/work/career/getting that paper. I don't have time for relationships. I want to get my career started first. Men suck anyway." And I know these women want to get married and have a family one day. Why can't you work towards both?

 

[w332]

I'm officially working towards both. Finding a partner will will be my top priority though.

 

[SweetNic_JA]

I'm in my 30s as well, single and working on multiple businesses. I don't see why it has to be an either/or situation. You rarely see men putting parts of their lives on hold to find a wife. Start your business and make sure to leave time for a social life too. Besides, like attracts like so you'll probably end up with a great man who is just as driven and goal oriented as yourself.

Great advice. This is the avenue I'd take.

It doesn't have to be either all. OP you can have it all.