A Man's Duty/Job

[CaribbeanQueen]

We all know that men/women are equal BUT are there some things that as a woman you absolutely refuse to do because you consider them to be a 'man's duty/job'?

eg. I know some women who refuse to pay the mortgage because they feel that is the man's job or responsiblity.

 

[tocthesunrise]

I think these are things men should do....more out of respect than duty.

1. Take out the trash (i don't care if you're my boyfriend, play play brother, cousin, or father....you ate here...oh you taking out the trash).

2. Pump gas (of course I pump my own gas when i'm alone....but if you are who man ever and we're riding together....you pumping the gas. I'll pay ....no problem....but you pumping)

3. Help carry stuff (simple, i know. but i hate to see a woman carrying a butt load of stuff as she walks with a man who has his hands in his pockets...oh but no!!)

4. Opening doors (this is more a date rule....especially on the first date)


Old fashion? Yeah, I know. I also realize men sometimes don't know what do b/c they don't want to offend by offering too much help....but the proper thing to do is to ask. Then all is well.......but i'm still lookin at him crazy if the woman he is with is carrying two suitcases and he's texting his homey!! .

JMHO

 

[Minx]

1. Killing things- spiders, large bugs, etc.

2. Checking out noises in the house in the middle of the night

3. Fixing plumbing and electrical issues

4. Making sure everything is in tip top shape under the hood of the car
and changing flat tires

5. Cutting the grass/mowing the lawn

 

[Farida]

I have the unpopular opinion. I don't believe men and women are equal. I don't mean that one is better than the other either. I think we are more of two sides of the same coin. I do believe women and men should be afforded equal opportunities though.

When we're together I would like a man to:
1. Be the ones to go downstairs when I hear creepy sounds at night.
2. Open the door.
3. Change the tires on my car.
4. Wash my car.
5. Fix things around the house.
6. Mow the lawn
7. Shovel the snow in the driveway

etc

 

[carcajada]

A man's job spans from any work needing to be done outside to every hissy fit I have inside the house except for cooking, washing, and being the primary cleaner.

 

[damarc94]

I'm not married, but here is how I want to be treated by my man...

1. Pay for our dates (99% of the time)
2. Negotiate big ticket items (I took my boyfriend with me when I bought my car. He had the dealer thinking he was going to the buy the car until I pulled out my checkbook and the actual papers had to be signed)
3. Opening doors, even my car door.
4. Driving (my best friend doesn't agree, but whether we take his car or mine, he drives)

Plus all the others mentioned.

 

[Bint Yusef]

I have the unpopular opinion. I don't believe men and women are equal. I don't mean that one is better than the other either. I think we are more of two sides of the same coin. I do believe women and men should be afforded equal opportunities though.

I absolutely agree. We are equal in that our lives our worth the same, but we arent the same. There are definite things that I think a man should do and that I should do. Because we are modernized and busy sometimes we trade off, but in general we have our division of chores.

He should do everything having to do with the car.
All yardwork if needed.
Taking out the trash.
Fix-it work around the home.

Things he should never have to do:
Wash any clothes.
Wash dishes.
Cook, but he does like doing it so sometimes he does voluntarily.
Clean the inside of the house.

 

[Desert Skye]

I'm not married, but here is how I want to be treated by my man...

1. Pay for our dates (99% of the time)
2. Negotiate big ticket items (I took my boyfriend with me when I bought my car. He had the dealer thinking he was going to the buy the car until I pulled out my checkbook and the actual papers had to be signed)
3. Opening doors, even my car door.
4. Driving (my best friend doesn't agree, but whether we take his car or mine, he drives)

Plus all the others mentioned.

I can totally understand why you would rather have a man negotiate that. From my experience, salesman will not really take us women seriously. Even though you know your stuff, they will still try to take advatage of you. But bring in a man, then its business.

 

[CandiceC]

1. Following up with issues with my vehicle at the shop. I may have to get the truck there if I have issues while on the road, but I'm not dealing with the mechanic if DH can get to the shop.

2. If I'm going somewhere and there is a male around (DH, dad, brother) I don't drive to wherever we're going.

 

[Butterfly08]

1. Killing things- spiders, large bugs, etc.

2. Checking out noises in the house in the middle of the night

3. Fixing plumbing and electrical issues

4. Making sure everything is in tip top shape under the hood of the car
and changing flat tires

5. Cutting the grass/mowing the lawn

RIGHT!

 

[Butterfly08]

I absolutely agree. We are equal in that our lives our worth the same, but we arent the same. There are definite things that I think a man should do and that I should do. Because we are modernized and busy sometimes we trade off, but in general we have our division of chores.

He should do everything having to do with the car.
All yardwork if needed.
Taking out the trash.
Fix-it work around the home.

Things he should never have to do:
Wash any clothes.
Wash dishes.
Cook, but he does like doing it so sometimes he does voluntarily.
Clean the inside of the house.

I don't think there's one solid answer. Every couple will need to talk and decide what works for them. I am currently in school, work full time and helping dh raise our daughter. We split cooking, washing dishes, and cleaning down the middle. Before I put my foot down I was wearing myself out. These type of chores are daily. Mechanical repairs, yardwork, etc. and other stereotypically male duties are usually more weekly, bi-weekly, etc. I work too hard to come home and do all the daily work by myself. Thank God dh helps me (NOW).

I would love for dh to do all of the "male" stuff for me in addition to helping with daily chores, but then that would be selfish, right? As long as he kills the bugs, I can help with all the other "male" duties. He gives me grief about it, but as long as it gets done, that's all I care about.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

I would love for dh to do all of the "male" stuff for me in addition to helping with daily chores, but then that would be selfish, right? As long as he kills the bugs, I can help with all the other "male" duties. He gives me grief about it, but as long as it gets done, that's all I care about.

co-sign.

I prefer a man that if he sees a need steps in to fill/fix it. If I'm home alone and the garbage needs to be taken out, it's not going to sit there until he gets home. I would hope that if he saw a 'womans work' that needs to be done he'd just do it instead of waiting on me.

To me if you assign work it feels like you're keeping score.

 

[Bint Yusef]

[/b]
I don't think there's one solid answer. Every couple will need to talk and decide what works for them.

Right, and the above works just fine for us.

 

[SEMO]

I agree with most of what's already been posted, and will add a few of my own.

I expect a man to be willing to be the sole breadwinner. I'm getting a Master's degree and plan on having a career but if I decide to be a stay-at-home mom and not work for awhile I don't want him to be looking at me cross-eyed talking about where is my share of the money going to come from .

I expect all the gentlemanly behavior. Opening doors, walking on the outside of the curb, carrying the bags/groceries, etc.

He should also be my defender. If he's around and someone is disrespecting me or not treating me right I expect him to step-in and set the person straight, whoever they are. (I remember being mad at my mom once and saying something about it to my dad and he said, "don't talk about my wife like that." I could only respect that and be quiet). Your man dictates how people are allowed (and not allowed) to treat you, even when it comes to your kids. He should defend me physically, spiritually, socially, etc. from attacks.

I have other things on my list, but these three (along with a lot of stuff that was already said) are some of the most important duties I feel a man has.

 

[Laginappe]

Its his job to investigate the things that go bump in the night.

 

[sky_blu]

I agree with jamila and jcoily. I think a man should do everything i can do and ill help him out as well. Ive been staying by myself for awhile now so i can kill bugs, keep up with my car maintenance, and do the dirty work but i know it wuld be nice if i had a man to do some of it.

 

[GodsPromises]

I agree with everything you posted. I couldn't said it better. If it's not my son it's my dh.

I think these are things men should do....more out of respect than duty.

1. Take out the trash (i don't care if you're my boyfriend, play play brother, cousin, or father....you ate here...oh you taking out the trash).

2. Pump gas (of course I pump my own gas when i'm alone....but if you are who man ever and we're riding together....you pumping the gas. I'll pay ....no problem....but you pumping)

3. Help carry stuff (simple, i know. but i hate to see a woman carrying a butt load of stuff as she walks with a man who has his hands in his pockets...oh but no!!)

4. Opening doors (this is more a date rule....especially on the first date)


Old fashion? Yeah, I know. I also realize men sometimes don't know what do b/c they don't want to offend by offering too much help....but the proper thing to do is to ask. Then all is well.......but i'm still lookin at him crazy if the woman he is with is carrying two suitcases and he's texting his homey!! .

JMHO

 

[stinastina]

I think these are things men should do....more out of respect than duty.

1. Take out the trash (i don't care if you're my boyfriend, play play brother, cousin, or father....you ate here...oh you taking out the trash).

2. Pump gas (of course I pump my own gas when i'm alone....but if you are who man ever and we're riding together....you pumping the gas. I'll pay ....no problem....but you pumping)

3. Help carry stuff (simple, i know. but i hate to see a woman carrying a butt load of stuff as she walks with a man who has his hands in his pockets...oh but no!!)

4. Opening doors (this is more a date rule....especially on the first date)


Old fashion? Yeah, I know. I also realize men sometimes don't know what do b/c they don't want to offend by offering too much help....but the proper thing to do is to ask. Then all is well.......but i'm still lookin at him crazy if the woman he is with is carrying two suitcases and he's texting his homey!! .

JMHO

co-signing.

 

[MrsBurns82]

Growing up with boys who somehow neglected to realize that I was a girl I've always been a hardcore tomboy. But my current SO is very sexist not so much that it's offensive but when were together I don't walk on the outside of the street, I practically had to beg to pay for things( I think I may have messed that up for myself he's gotten a bit spoiled) he sleeps closest to the door anything that has to do with my car he gets it done, if it's enough bags for him to carry alone he carries them and if it's cold outside I'm rushed into the house for him to make however many trips it takes to get the bags in, he takes the trash out. We work at the same place he doesn't want me in certain areas of our job.

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut, on the flip side although he is not a slob and he cleans up after himself he expect me to make and clear the table. He hates when I curse (did I tell you I have a mouth of a sailor). Passing gas is out of the question (my brothers and I use to have contest. I know gross) if I break a nail he wants me to get it fix that day. He's absolutly helpless when it comes to bills although he pays them he wants me to sort them. I have to remind him of all of his appointments.

So while he's doing all this guy stuff I've got to keep up with my girl stuff which isn't too bad of an exchange when I really look at I think I get the better end of the deal because he pays for my girly upkeep and helps me when I cook. It use to get on my nerves at first but now it's kinda like second nature. At work it still is annoying

But although I never expected these things and never had a problem with doing most of them myself, now I'm not sure if I could revert back. I've been spoiled

 

[Ms Red]

I agree with your list as well as Viv's...

But I can't lie, I'm still working on the cooking/cleaning part and he needs to work on the car part

To add to the list, I do not like to pump gas at all and didn't ever have to until my 20s. He pumps the gas.

Opening doors, pulling out chairs, offering his jacket on a chilly night, walking on the outside of the sidewalk if we are near vehicles look, helping me down a flight of stairs if I need it, etc. are all givens.

I absolutely agree. We are equal in that our lives our worth the same, but we arent the same. There are definite things that I think a man should do and that I should do. Because we are modernized and busy sometimes we trade off, but in general we have our division of chores.

He should do everything having to do with the car.
All yardwork if needed.
Taking out the trash.
Fix-it work around the home.

Things he should never have to do:
Wash any clothes.
Wash dishes.
Cook, but he does like doing it so sometimes he does voluntarily.
Clean the inside of the house.