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"Girl you need to get a relaxer or your hair is going to break off"

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DreamLife

DreamLife

Well-Known Member
Thats what this girl at school just said to me. I was sitting outside and one girl came up (associate) and said "You're hair looks half decent today, you don't have 3D roots and your not wearing that crazy bun" and she said why the hec do you get a relaxer like three-four times a year? You need a relaxer. And the other girl says "Yeah you shouldn't do that because your hair is going to break off." And I say "Well it didn't. Goodbye ladies." And walk off. Meanwhile the first girl told me two days ago that over the summer her hairdresser said that her hair was so damaged that it seemed like it was "Burned out" from pressing combs and flat irons. She is natural and her hairdresser said it seemed like she got a bad relaxer. AND she has glued in tracks in her hair and said that she would put some in my hair if I wanted it. HELL TO THE HELL NAW!:wallbash:

LOL I'm laughing now, people at this school are so immature. I feel like I'm still in HS. I'm a senior and people who say this to me are about to graduate or in a graduate school here. Its sad.
 
no they didn't:nono:!

you are doing the right thing for your hair!! They may have been speaking out of jealousy who knows:rolleyes:

your hair looks healthy to me!
 
Girl, I know the feeling it like hater all over now-a-days. Us black women seem to be so jelousy of another beauty. I will never understand it. Don't pay these girl any attention soon your hair will be hanging down your back and they will just be hatin more.

Great way of handling it though, the lady way of handling thing makes an bigger impact than a additude everytime.
 
Please remember this: Everyone else always knows whats best for you and your hair lol :rolleyes:

Girl if i told you some of the "advice" my dear coworkers have given me you'd laugh!!! Even my mentor (who is my ACE) gets off that handle sometimes. for example, i asked her to walk with me over to the Aveda store, she says "Your hair would be so much longer if you stopped using these white products" Mind you, her hair is all chewed up looking... but i digress....

do whatever YOU want to your hair, because even if it doenst turn out the greatest, YOU did it on your own terms!
 
Days like these..I wish God could just let my hair sprout out of my head at that very second so I could prove to them...that Good hair care equals Long Hair! It's like you can't explain it to them...although you wanna be like ***** just wait bout 6 more months..I got sumtin for dat @ss:spank:
 
You are armed with real hair care knowledge. Them heffas are probably still subscribing to all of the ridiculous archaic notions of black hair care - so forgive them, for they know not any better. :lol:
 
People have it set in their minds that you have to relax bone straight every 4-6 weeks. They don't know how to manage hair like we do, so of course it's going to break off. Think about how most of us thought about hair care before we found this site.
 
Vanity1 said:
Craziness/jealousy/immaturity has no age limit!:grin:
Click to expand...


Yep. I would add ignorance too. And the scary thing is, these folks giving advice, most common being to relax cuz they can see my new growth -- their hair are like totally jacked up. :nono: First, usually tell me how nice and long my hair is, then proceed to tell me to relax it cuz it's gonna break off and God help me if try to explain . . .

To the OP: Be grateful that you know better. :yep: And you were absolutely right NOT to try and school them on hair care. In similar situations, I usually do just say "thanks" and exit or change the conversation.
 
The thing thats so funny is that I barely have new growth! I just started a thread the other day about having no new growth. My whole head is just pretty thick since I don't use the flat iron. Hell, Its been a month, this is JUST THE BEGINNING of this good, 3 month long stretch! :lachen:And no, I do not waste my time telling people about the things I've learned on LHCF if they are talking to me like that. The only person that I had to bug over and over and tried so hard to convince was my cousin. I really wanted her to get on the LHCF wagon because we have the same hair, but hers was 10x as damaged as mine. And after thinking that everyone's hair on her was fake and saying it was a joke, she is a major lurker and now she is finally learning to take care of her hair. But beyond family, and the friend that told me about this site, thats about it! I'm gon let that girl go on with her glued in tracks and I'm gon mind my own business...
 
freshlikemoi said:
Days like these..I wish God could just let my hair sprout out of my head at that very second so I could prove to them...that Good hair care equals Long Hair! It's like you can't explain it to them...although you wanna be like ***** just wait bout 6 more months..I got sumtin for dat @ss:spank:
Click to expand...

Man I pray everyday when I get out in December and go back to school next May to walk across that stage my hair is healthy and long! And I won't be answering any questions....lol.:lachen:
 
Lol, my SO and I were talking last night about my hair and I was showing him my roots where the new growth is thick (I;m about 3 months post) and he told me I should get a relaxer immeadiately. He knows how I'm on the hair boards and about taking care of my hair not to mention the last time I let him talk me into getting a relaxer from his sister (who just shaved her own head due to extreme baldness and damage) it kind of jacked me up. And I get so annoyed with the females I know whose hair has stayed the same length since I known them (about 3-4 years) yet they want to tell me about my hair and if their roots get a slight wave pattern they're dipping their whole head in a bucket of relaxer while I'm dealing with Real newgrowth over here.:wallbash:

Sorry for the rant.:look:
 
Well technically it will break off between the two textures. But if you are taking care of it well and not manipulating it much, you can minimize that breakage. Ignore them. They need to get their own heads right before offering anybody else advice.
 
evagray said:
Thats what this girl at school just said to me. I was sitting outside and one girl came up (associate) and said "You're hair looks half decent today, you don't have 3D roots and your not wearing that crazy bun" and she said why the hec do you get a relaxer like three-four times a year? You need a relaxer. And the other girl says "Yeah you shouldn't do that because your hair is going to break off." And I say "Well it didn't. Goodbye ladies." And walk off. Meanwhile the first girl told me two days ago that over the summer her hairdresser said that her hair was so damaged that it seemed like it was "Burned out" from pressing combs and flat irons. She is natural and her hairdresser said it seemed like she got a bad relaxer. AND she has glued in tracks in her hair and said that she would put some in my hair if I wanted it. HELL TO THE HELL NAW!:wallbash:
Click to expand...

love that!!! :yay:
 
People always have these notions when in fact, they aren't right most of the time. And I can't believe someone with neck length, chewed up, seems like it has been lifted 3 times, dry, thin-looking hair that has been that way ever since I've known them. And then they are talking about, "Oh, I don't like long hair." Then why did you just have a ponytail two months ago and you just took your quick weave (27) out.:nono:
 
Ahhh - statements from the ignorant. It's a shame that most black women don't know how to take care of their hair so it can stay healthy :nono:
 
freshlikemoi said:
Days like these..I wish God could just let my hair sprout out of my head at that very second so I could prove to them...that Good hair care equals Long Hair! It's like you can't explain it to them...although you wanna be like ***** just wait bout 6 more months..I got sumtin for dat @ss:spank:
Click to expand...


:goodone::lachen:
 
L'il Sis, you handled it beautifully! :lachen: I truly don't understand what it is with our people and seeing new growth and BUNS. I'm curious to know why buns are such a :nono: to some people.

I had a couple people tell me I need to lay my edges down because they're furry. So what? What my hair does doesn't affect anyone's health or paycheck. What someone says to me will affect their health if they catch me at the wrong moment, though... :boxing:

You go ahead and strut across that stage with your gorgeous, shiny healthy, thick, beautiful hair. Regardless of what glorious length it is then, you got it without the aid of glue. Oh, and get lots of pics!!
 
I wouldn't worry about them two.. I bet their hair is so jacked up they wouldn't know a healthy hair if it slapped them in the face. They are always the ones making comments...
 
Girl, what school do you go to? Just tell me, please!!!!!!! :spank::spank:It's always the people that have no business openning up their mouth, that have some "pearl of wisdom," to impart on you. I am happy you walked away, black-on-black crime is not worth it.
 
PrettyHaitian said:
Girl, what school do you go to? Just tell me, please!!!!!!! :spank::spank:It's always the people that have no business openning up their mouth, that have some "pearl of wisdom," to impart on you. I am happy you walked away, black-on-black crime is not worth it.
Click to expand...

Why is that? LOL!
 
Girl just do your thing and let your hair do the talking. Believe me soon they will all be asking what you are doing with their mouth hanging open. I don't waste my time telling them our secrets.
 
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