heat damage for hubby/SO

[Spongebob]

Should a husband or SO have any say in how your hair looks?

If he likes you with your hair bone straight, would you apply heat regularly and risk the health of your hair, that you may have worked so hard to attain in the first place?

 

[BBritdenise]

I'd do it every now and then and let him know that you can't do it everyday or you will have no hair

 

[sofash]

A husband YES
BF NO

 

[sofash]

also you dont have to aply heat regularly for straight hair. you just gotta figure out a method.
the two must find a happy median. if your hair wasnt straight when you met your husband or got married to him then he should have spoken up then

 

[diadall]

I think if a spouse or SO ask you to do something to your hair you don't want to do, and if you do it, then you are trying to keep him satisfied...happy...keep him.

 

[hairmaster]

Give and take is the key to a good relationship, they may have a good idea as to how you can wear you're hair or clothes.

 

[LightEyedMami]

Nope!.... i wouldn't because as much as men tend to like straight hair MORE of them like long hair....I always tell my husband i will keep the variety as best as possible (while protecting my hair) becuase i know him and he loves really long hair!!!... and by the end of next year when he is playing with (and pulling ) my waist-length hair, he will forget about the strict regemine i had before ...............OP does your hubby like long hair or he is okay with short hair as long as its straight?

 

[naturalmanenyc]

Most women want to look appealing to their husband/SO; however, I would not risk damaging my hair to satisfy him.

Are you natural? Bone straight hair is hard to achieve and maintain without a relaxer.

Are wigs/weave an option?

 

[30something]

Using heat doesn't always mean heat damage so no I wouldn't have a problem with it.. I would just straighten as offend as my hair allows me too. But if he wants it straight all the time well, all marriages survives on compromising on both parts so I'm sure straightening as often as my hair allows me would be just about good enough to please the both of us.

 

[empressri]

My SO is like this: he said some people just change their hair and blah blah and if that isn't how you looked when you met, you sort of have to ease them into you changing your look instead of just flat out doing something different.

But risking heat damage to my hair? Sorry but it just isn't going to happen. We would have to find some happy medium because I refuse to damage anything on my body for their aesthetic pleasure.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Do rollersets under the pibbs cause heat damage? I may not be able to get Marcel iron straight but I can pull off a relatively straight, shiny and bouncy rollerset on 4a/b hair. Some ORS edge control around the edges and most people wouln't know the difference.

 

[napbella]

No, but I would explain things to him, because at the end of the day, it's really long hair that he wants to enjoy.

 

[candy626]

I would compromise with rollersetting. If he wanted it totally flat ironed all the time he'd be SOL.

 

[Lylddlebit]

I haven't had to but I believe I would. The reason why is I like wearing my hair straight just as much as he likes seeing it. Heat damage isn't something I am afraid of or would cut off if I had it just as long as it didn't interfere with what I wanted to do with my hair.

 

[Evolving78]

i wear my hair down (straight) when we have date night. most of time it is done with a roller set and flat ironed roots. but i will not risk damaging my hair for anybody. plus my man likes long hair more than it being bone straight. we hooked back up when i had locs.

 

[MrsJaiDiva]

Thankfully my Dh doesn't care...he just wants to touch it, and is mad that he can't when he wants to... (My hair stays under my bonnet until it's time to go out)

But I don't do anything for anyone else's approval, and I'm definitely not walking around with damaged hair, so you can feel good....what kinda BS is that? I had to explain that to an ex once...it's MY body. You want long straight hair?...go grow it yourself, n whip it where you like.

 

[JBunnie]

Significant other: NO

Husband: NO

I'm not one to rule out using heat on my hair period, but if my SO/Hubby wants me to heat style my hair to the point of damage, he's sick in the head, face and mouth. My boyfriend now sometimes gets on my nerves with some of the things he does/says, and that's enough to deal with in itself. So I know if him, or anyone, ask me to damage my hair he's living in the wish a n* woods.

I'll straighten my hair from time to time, and if he wants it straight for a specific event; give me ample time to plan (you all rememeber when Jason, on The Game, told Kelly he wanted her hair curly for the game hours before, psshhhh BOY STOP! AND she's a White girl, imagine telling me that, SO SIR! YOU LIVING IN THOSE WOODS AGAIN) and I'll get it done no doubt, but permanent damage to my hair, no sir, can't do that. Still LOVE you though!

 

[JBunnie]

MrsJaiDiva, when I used to keep my hair straight all the tim I used to wrap my hair up AS SOON AS I got into his apartment and he got on me saying, "everyone else get to see you all pretty with your hair down and I don't." So dramatic.

 

[Evolving78]

Significant other: NO

Husband: NO

I'm not one to rule out using heat on my hair period, but if my SO/Hubby wants me to heat style my hair to the point of damage, he's sick in the head, face and mouth. My boyfriend now sometimes gets on my nerves with some of the things he does/says, and that's enough to deal with in itself. So I know if him, or anyone, ask me to damage my hair he's living in the wish a n* woods.

I'll straighten my hair from time to time, and if he wants it straight for a specific event; give me ample time to plan (you all rememeber when Jason, on The Game, told Kelly he wanted her hair curly for the game hours before, psshhhh BOY STOP! AND she's a White girl, imagine telling me that, SO SIR! YOU LIVING IN THOSE WOODS AGAIN) and I'll get it done no doubt, but permanent damage to my hair, no sir, can't do that. Still LOVE you though!

i straightened (blow dr/flat iron) my hair three weeks in a row, not because he wanted me too, it was spur of the moment getaways and dates that forced me to rush. now, i will just have to plan a head of time or treat every weekend like i am going somewhere.

 

[JBunnie]

i straightened (blow dr/flat iron) my hair three weeks in a row, not because he wanted me too, it was spur of the moment getaways and dates that forced me to rush. now, i will just have to plan a head of time or treat every weekend like i am going somewhere.

Nothing wrong with that if that's what you wanted to do. I'd see myself doing the same thing if I had something to do for work, or if I wanted to change it up. I'd just be sure to plan to moisture DC each time before I straightened and use a heavy protein DC as soon as I go back to curly since I used heat some many times back to back. Works for everybody!!!!

 

[Seamonster]

So I know if him, or anyone, ask me to damage my hair he's living in the wish a n* woods.

SO SIR! YOU LIVING IN THOSE WOODS AGAIN) !

I am cracking up over this, he is in the woods, lol.

 

[melisandre]

No, I wouldn't risk heat damage for a spouse or SO. I would wear wigs/weaves, if he really wanted me with straight hair. IMO, it shouldn't be a big issue. *shrug*

 

[JBunnie]

I am cracking up over this, he is in the woods, lol.

LOL, I can get real hyped up over hypothetical situations.

No, I wouldn't risk heat damage for a spouse or SO. I would wear wigs/weaves, if he really wanted me with straight hair. IMO, it shouldn't be a big issue. *shrug*

You're right that it shouldn't be that big of an issue, but there are always so many standards of beauty and expectations for women, smh.