"Natural Hair Community My A**" -NikkiiDior

[*Frisky*]

I just don't get why all the HOSTILITY and the need to speak on her how other folks should feel about being light skinned with "good hair"!! hahahaha Don't they get that they look stupid for being in a uproar about somebody's else hair!! Maybe I am the dumb one but if I kept on making videos about a certain topic claiming that I didn't give a phuck one way or the other yada yada yada, I would have to use the so called therapy knowledge I claimed that I had to analyze my dam self.

 

[Windsy]

WOW....it's just hair...smdh!!

 

[JOI]

I just don't get why all the HOSTILITY and the need to speak on her how other folks should feel about being light skinned with "good hair"!! hahahaha Don't they get that they look stupid for being in a uproar about somebody's else hair!! Maybe I am the dumb one but if I kept on making videos about a certain topic claiming that I didn't give a phuck one way or the other yada yada yada, I would have to use the so called therapy knowledge I claimed that I had to analyze my dam self.

I dont get it either, i wish they would just leave it alone. smh

 

[qchelle]

Exactly! Even after 3 videos I'm not sure why she thinks the shade she felt was over her hair.erplexed People throw shade randomly for a myriad of different reasons. For all we know the woman she feels was throwing shade and ignoring her could have been pondering her grocery list.

Apparently this has a couple of people in an uproar.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xgz_UWvmW10&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bKwG87KKN8U&feature=feedu

http://youtu.be/uhG9shdCNxs

I should add, looser curl patterns take just as much time as 4a/4b hair. My brother's daughters have a time with their hair and have to redo it often. I do not know many 3a, 3b, 3c textured ladies that can rock a style for a full week like I can with my 4a hair.

Bold: is she naked?!

 

[Lucie]

It seems odd that this happened at a natural hair expo. Regardless of her light skin and softer-textured hair, why would someone be so blatantly rude to her? Was it because of how she looked? Or perhaps the woman was just a jerk to begin with? If I was getting bad service, I would speak up about it. I am not saying she needed to cause a scene but if she paid her money for a seminar and a person was going out of their way not to help her that needs to be addressed.

Also, by watching the video it seems Nikki has quite a few insecurities. I know this ain't no LOA thread but if you keep thinking about people hating on you because you have light skin with good hair, you're getting to get more of it. I hope she is able to move past this and not let anyone continue to steal her joy.

 

[ontheqtrain]

She has beautiful hair and I am sorry she has to go through this, but to attack the whole natural community and to play the victim because one chick discriminated against her hair doesn't mean we are all are jealous of looser curlier hair and etc. We as women need to just get along. She should go to the next natural hair expo and keep rocking her beautiful hair, don't let one ignorant person bring you down.

 

[knt1229]

I find it peculiar that people are actually believing what Nikki Dior said. I mean come on. A hair expo has hundreds if not thousands of participants and every woman there threw shade at her because of her hair. It is very telling that folk actually believed and defended that nonsense she spoke about. That right there tells me there is a problem. And the problem is that folk expect dark skin nappy heads to be insecure, jealous and mean. But the light skin good hair girls are so sweet, innocent, and pure. There is no way she could be crazy, lying or just plain paranoid. If she claims the nappy heads are jealous then she is automatically believed and defended.

Light skin good hair chicks ain't angels and they ain't above throwing shade, being jealous, or starting ish. Believe that!!

 

[MrsJaiDiva]

Lord...at the end of the day you just gotta give the haters the finger and keep it moving!! How you gonna sit and cry over the opinion of a stranger? Maybe it's my Bronx attitude, but I just automatically act like "I have money....so you better give me service!" I go into Bloomingdales, and Saks, and I don't care if those people ignore me at first...I have Money! I snap my fingers and tell them to go run fetch! She's too old to be acting like an insecure teenager...not everyone is going to like you, but that's OK! Only You need to like You.

My curl pattern is very loose, even though I'm dark skinned...I had long hair growing up. Everyone hated me. I was crushed....even cut my hair! But now I'm a grown woman...All the right people love me, and everyone else can kick rocks. Why in the world should a stranger at a hair show bring your world crashing down?!

 

[MilkChocolateOne]

I find it peculiar that people are actually believing what Nikki Dior said. I mean come on. A hair expo has hundreds if not thousands of participants and every woman there threw shade at her because of her hair. It is very telling that folk actually believed and defended that nonsense she spoke about. That right there tells me there is a problem. And the problem is that folk expect dark skin nappy heads to be insecure, jealous and mean. But the light skin good hair girls are so sweet, innocent, and pure. There is no way she could be crazy, lying or just plain paranoid. If she claims the nappy heads are jealous then she is automatically believed and defended.

Light skin good hair chicks ain't angels and they ain't above throwing shade, being jealous, or starting ish. Believe that!!

I have noticed this too. All dark skinned women do not walk around coveting and hating light skin. Plenty of us do not have a color complex and we are quite comfortable in our own skin.

 

[knt1229]

I have noticed this too. All dark skinned women do not walk around coveting and hating light skin. Plenty of us do not have a color complex and we are quite comfortable in our own skin.

100% agree and I quoted for emphasis.

 

[LittleLuxe]

I find it peculiar that people are actually believing what Nikki Dior said. I mean come on. A hair expo has hundreds if not thousands of participants and every woman there threw shade at her because of her hair. It is very telling that folk actually believed and defended that nonsense she spoke about. That right there tells me there is a problem. And the problem is that folk expect dark skin nappy heads to be insecure, jealous and mean. But the light skin good hair girls are so sweet, innocent, and pure. There is no way she could be crazy, lying or just plain paranoid. If she claims the nappy heads are jealous then she is automatically believed and defended.

Light skin good hair chicks ain't angels and they ain't above throwing shade, being jealous, or starting ish. Believe that!!

Is it any different from a woman posting a story about discrimination they perceived getting from a white person and dozens of women on this board immediately co-signing and supporting her?

 

[RedVelvet310]

I don't understand how because that woman was ignoring her she assumes that she didn't like her because of her hair. When people assume things like this, I assume that:
a) she herself feels that she is better than you because she's light skin with curly hair, hence the reason she feels people "hate" on her
b) she must have been giving off something to that woman for her to ignore her, and she must be giving that off to others in her life

This is the 21st century having light skin and/or long hair especially in the natural hair community.. ESPECIALLY in America isn't a rarity, I refuse to believe that this is one sided and as widespread as this woman is making it out to be

 

[knt1229]

Is it any different from a woman posting a story about discrimination they perceived getting from a white person and dozens of women on this board immediately co-signing and supporting her?

I can't relate to those threads so I stay away from them. But the few I have read I felt the same way that I feel about the Nikki Dior vid. Everyone isn't hating on your hair or skin tone whether the haters are white, black, light skin or dark skin. Sometimes, you have to do some self reflection and take responsibility for the part you played in the situation.

FWIW, I'm not saying discrimination doesn't happen but I try to apply some common sense to the situation. In a room full of people ALL of them aren't going to hate you or throw shade at you or be jealous of you.

 

[reeko43]

And the problem is that folk expect dark skin nappy heads to be insecure, jealous and mean. But the light skin good hair girls are so sweet, innocent, and pure. There is no way she could be crazy, lying or just plain paranoid. If she claims the nappy heads are jealous then she is automatically believed and defended.

What folk have an expectation like that about dark and light people? In all my 46 years I have heard a lot but never that one. Is that something new? Also, I saw the woman's video and I didn't hear her say anyone was jealous of her. Maybe i need to watch it again.

Honestly, if a dark skinned person with tightly curled hair posted that they experienced mistreatment in any arena by anyone because of the color of their skin or their hair, I wouldn't assume they were lying. If they were hurting I would be very disturbed at what happened and would voice my support. I think that most here on the forum would as well.

It is too bad that we generalize people's experiences, feelings, reactions, etc. There are people who have all kinds of bad thoughts about skin color and hair texture. However, there are many who love and embrace all.

 

[reeko43]

Is it any different from a woman posting a story about discrimination they perceived getting from a white person and dozens of women on this board immediately co-signing and supporting her?

Boy would I love to see this question answered!

 

[knt1229]

Boy would I love to see this question answered!

I answered it upthread.

 

[lesedi]

After having watched the video, I still am not sure where the proof was that people discriminated against her because of her hair type.to be honest. Cause what kind of reception does any person expect from a group of strangers minding their own business? The woman at the entrance was rude but....dang! RUDE PEOPLE EXIST:- They don't all want your hair. I feel that her automatically coming to that conclusion is slightly extra and self indulgent. I don't dismiss that that kind of discrimination does happen though, and it is wrong. I feel that HYMEN10NENCE and Nikkii made a lot of good points.
It just highlighted how much the good hair vs bad hair thinking lives on. And to be honest, we knew that already.

 

[reeko43]

I can't relate to those threads so I stay away from them. But the few I have read I felt the same way that I feel about the Nikki Dior vid. Everyone isn't hating on your hair or skin tone whether the haters are white, black, light skin or dark skin. Sometimes, you have to do some self reflection and take responsibility for the part you played in the situation.

FWIW, I'm not saying discrimination doesn't happen but I try to apply some common sense to the situation. In a room full of people ALL of them aren't going to hate you or throw shade at you or be jealous of you.

Maybe we are not watching the same video. I didn't hear anything about everyone in the room hating or the person or being jealous of her. You have mentioned this twice so I am getting confused.

 

[knt1229]

What folk have an expectation like that about dark and light people? In all my 46 years I have heard a lot but never that one. Is that something new? Also, I saw the woman's video and I didn't hear her say anyone was jealous of her. Maybe i need to watch it again.

Honestly, if a dark skinned person with tightly curled hair posted that they experienced mistreatment in any arena by anyone because of the color of their skin or their hair, I wouldn't assume they were lying. If they were hurting I would be very disturbed at what happened and would voice my support. I think that most here on the forum would as well.

It is too bad that we generalize people's experiences, feelings, reactions, etc. There are people who have all kinds of bad thoughts about skin color and hair texture. However, there are many who love and embrace all.

Well she said someone threw shade at her because of her hair which implies some type of jealousy or hatefulness based on her hair.

I'm not assuming she's lying but what she said doesn't make a lot of sense considering there were other light skin type 3's at the event. So what she said gives me pause and makes me think the problem is more than likely of her own making. Whether she is paranoid, has baggage from past hurts, or is just a drama queen I don't know. But it doesn't sound reasonable that folk would single her out when their were other women at the event with a similiar skin tone and hair texture.

 

[RedVelvet310]

After having watched the video, I still am not sure where the proof was that people discriminated against her because of her hair type.to be honest. Cause what kind of reception does any person expect from a group of strangers minding their own business? The woman at the entrance was rude but....dang! RUDE PEOPLE EXIST:- They don't all want your hair. I feel that her automatically coming to that conclusion is slightly extra and self indulgent. I don't dismiss that that kind of discrimination does happen though, and it is wrong. I feel that HYMEN10NENCE and Nikkii made a lot of good points.
It just highlighted how much the good hair vs bad hair thinking lives on. And to be honest, we knew that already.

But the question is who is it living in? It's one thing for a demographic of people to have an insuperiority complex about it.. that needs addressing. But it's another of a demographic of people to have a superiority complex about it, and fabricate this "hate"... that is not OUR (the black community's) problem.

 

[knt1229]

Maybe we are not watching the same video. I didn't hear anything about everyone in the room hating or the person or being jealous of her. You have mentioned this twice so I am getting confused.

She said she didn't feel comfy because someone was rude to her because of her hair. She stayed 20 minutes and left. Then made a vid titled Natural Hair Community My A**. Clearly, she thinks there is general problem not just a problem with the one person.

 

[lesedi]

But the question is who is it living in? It's one thing for a demographic of people to have an insuperiority complex about it.. that needs addressing. But it's another of a demographic of people to have a superiority complex about it, and fabricate this "hate"... that is not OUR (the black community's) problem.

I think it lives in most people in the black community (beige to navy). And definitely in the white media.

 

[LittleLuxe]

Double post

 

[LittleLuxe]

I can't relate to those threads so I stay away from them. But the few I have read I felt the same way that I feel about the Nikki Dior vid. Everyone isn't hating on your hair or skin tone whether the haters are white, black, light skin or dark skin. Sometimes, you have to do some self reflection and take responsibility for the part you played in the situation.

FWIW, I'm not saying discrimination doesn't happen but I try to apply some common sense to the situation. In a room full of people ALL of them aren't going to hate you or throw shade at you or be jealous of you.

In general I'd agree with this. But overall I do find something super suspect about some of the responses. If you feel this way about all threads that's fine, but if this was a YouTube vid. of a dark skinned 4a/b claiming she walked into -fill in the blank- and was snubbed or felt excluded and was used to experiencing that people would be falling over themselves to co-sign, pat her on the back, comfort her.

Because it's someone of a lighter skin tone/different texture people claim: maybe she had a stank attitude, maybe it was your bad dye job, girl NOBODY jealous of YOU, yeah take it out on the WHOLE natural community why don't you???

I'm just wondering who that's helping to be honest. Is the point that someone of a looser texture shouldn't dare express any perception of discrimination because obviously only darker/happier girls experience that? Is it that suggesting discrimination or exclusion suggests she thinks she's special/better than others? Is it that white on some level people consider people Of this texture/color to be an enemy of their own struggle? Because they have it easier, ergo they shouldn't complain...but they sure better not brag either.

I'm just wondering. Sometimes I'm curious about some of this on a deeper level.

 

[reeko43]

She said she didn't feel comfy because someone was rude to her because of her hair. She stayed 20 minutes and left. Then made a vid titled Natural Hair Community My A**. Clearly, she thinks there is general problem not just a problem with the one person.

But more than one person does not mean ALL. She also states that she has had issues leading up to this so her video wasn't just a reaction to one event.

 

[reeko43]

Well she said someone threw shade at her because of her hair which implies some type of jealousy or hatefulness based on her hair.

I can see where you are going but she could have been implying other things such as "this is a Black thang, you couldn't possibly understand?" or "the natural hair movement only applies to 4a-z hair, you didn't get the memo?" I'm just saying I am not about to add or subtract from what was stated in the video. I am definitely not about to assume that this couldn't have possibly happen to her because she is light skinned with "good hurr" and that these bright chicks are always thinking someone is jealous of them.

 

[reeko43]

In general I'd agree with this. But overall I do find something super suspect about some of the responses. If you feel this way about all threads that's fine, but if this was a YouTube vid. of a dark skinned 4a/b claiming she walked into -fill in the blank- and was snubbed or felt excluded and was used to experiencing that people would be falling over themselves to co-sign, pat her on the back, comfort her.

Because it's someone of a lighter skin tone/different texture people claim: maybe she had a stank attitude, maybe it was your bad dye job, girl NOBODY jealous of YOU, yeah take it out on the WHOLE natural community why don't you???

I'm just wondering who that's helping to be honest. Is the point that someone of a looser texture shouldn't dare express any perception of discrimination because obviously only darker/happier girls experience that? Is it that suggesting discrimination or exclusion suggests she thinks she's special/better than others? Is it that white on some level people consider people Of this texture/color to be an enemy of their own struggle? Because they have it easier, ergo they shouldn't complain...but they sure better not brag either.

I'm just wondering. Sometimes I'm curious about some of this on a deeper level.

Thank you, thank you thank you! Excellent points and questions. We've come a long way but we still have a long way to go...........

 

[Southernbella.]

Not trying to start anything, but...light skinned? She's about the same color as me and I don't consider myself lightskinned. I'm just saying, I'm sure she wasn't the lightest person in the room, so I'm not ready to assume she was getting "hated on" for her skintone.

It's possible she got some shade for her hair, but...eh, I don't know. Let me leave this thread

 

[Glamorous_chic]

I think we need to remember every race has their own issues and complexes and it can manifest just as negatively and divisively.

I forgot where specifically where I read it but I recall reading in a magazine once a Chinese girl saying she was essentially happy with her appearance. But while she was content living in California she'd secretly dread going home to visit her family.

This was because while she was thin by most American standards she was considered 'fat' in general by society back home. If she was eating in a restaurant she'd see the waitresses make certain expressions if she finished her whole plate or asked for dessert.

She'd also be scolded for her skin being too dark (living in California) by her Mom and would find tubes of skin lightening cream on her pillow at night. She also said her mom approached her one day saying she'd found a Dr. who did nose jobs for some daughter of her friend and was all excited because he was cheap and did a good job.

yes!! exactly. my co-worker who is east indian is exactly the same. she is probably a size 2-4 and 5'1 but thinks she is fat. she is not fat by any means, but is very chest heavy, and whenever she speak or sees her family, she always works out like crazy before hand, b/c by her family/cultural standards she is told she is too fat. also she will not stay out in the sun for too long b/c she doesn't want to tan too much. when she is out in the sun, she uses spf 100 not to prevent sun cancer but so she won't tan so she won't get too dark. she has a great job, great life, debt free, living the single life and is dating, but is miserable b/c her familiy thinks she is a failure by her mother (her mom told her this) b/c she isn't married with kids at the age of 33. so i agree, every culture has its hang=ups.

 

[nappystorm]

Not trying to start anything, but...light skinned? She's about the same color as me and I don't consider myself lightskinned. I'm just saying, I'm sure she wasn't the lightest person in the room, so I'm not ready to assume she was getting "hated on" for her skintone.

It's possible she got some shade for her hair, but...eh, I don't know. Let me leave this thread

I knew this was coming But yes, many people would consider her light skinned.