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"You can't be all black, your hair is too soft..."

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doobiequeen88

New Member
Yes, this caucasian sales rep at Sallys Beauty supply in Charlotte told me this when I was purchasing my silk elements condish. I went to the counter and casually said hi and asked how her day was going. So while pulling out my cash to pay for my items she stated, "there is no way that you can be all black, your hair is too soft, I have never seen a black woman walk in here with hair so bouncy and soft,theirs is always hard and brittle".

Wait...I live in Charlotte, NC and their are many, many, many women here with healthy hair. And the fact that my hair is soft has NOTHING to do with my race, all to do with hair care. I am mixed with black and blacker:yep: What I do not understand is why do some people not think before they talk???? This coment was not taken as a complement and she needs to take another HR training class on how to speek to customers. So offensive>>>

If something similar has happened to you, share your story....
 
"there is no way that you can be all black, your hair is too soft, I have never seen a black woman walk in here with hair so bouncy and soft,theirs is always hard and brittle".

hil_sideeye.jpg
 
Wow- to be a cashier at a corporate chain like Sally's just shooting her ignorant racist and prejudicial mouth off in such a manner is career suicide. I bet you were the only black person around when she said that- like you're supposed to feel privileged or something.

I think we need to start another LHCF boycott. Where was this Sally's location?

But to answer your question- I think just about everyone on this board has had one encounter or another with ignant clear folk.
 
Why is being mixed a compliment to some people. I just don't get it...she could have said your hair looks nice and that's it. Very inappropriate...how did you react?
 
I think you should call the store and ask to speak to her manager :yep:

Or even go back in person. People like that need to be taught a lesson.
 
her manager and corporate would be getting a few lovely phone calls and emails from me.
 
The sad thing about people making comments like that is the fact that they are too ignorant to know that it is really offensive. I get asked on a regular basis what I am mixed with. How did you respond?
 
i would contact her manager, the regional & district managers and sally's corporate headquarters via email and telephone.....i see plenty of clear folk with split ends and rough looking hair but i don't lump them all in a box:nono:
 
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I just call that ignorance. She does work in Sally's so she has seen her fair share of black women and you may be the first one she saw with well cared for hair. Her job may be the only time she is ever around black people. And lets not pretend that there isn't a bunch of chewed up heads amongst us black folks(off the board). Just saying :look:.
 
I just call that ignorance. She does work in Sally's so she has seen her fair share of black women and you may be the first one she saw with well cared for hair. Her job may be the only time she is ever around black people. And lets not pretend that there isn't a bunch of chewed up heads amongst us black folks(off the board). Just saying :look:.

regardless it is unprofessional and discriminatory. it's honestly something incredibly reprimandable because she in an employee, she wasn't just another woman shopping in the store, she works for the store.
 
regardless it is unprofessional and discriminatory. it's honestly something incredibly reprimandable because she in an employee, she wasn't just another woman shopping in the store, she works for the store.

I don't disagree there. She definitely should have kept her ignorant thoughts to herself. It's just not shocking to me.
 
I hate comments like that. My supervisor at work constantly whenever I wear my hair down is in awe at how "long my hair is" and she always says "and it's real??!!??" with that shocked expression on her face. It's really annoying, I'm gonna tell her something one day, only reason I haven't yet is b/c I know how I am and when I'm annoyed I lose my censor and come off really nasty. Shes asked to touch it a few times also which I have allowed since she's never seen a black girl with REAL, long hair ... Really??
 
I just call that ignorance. She does work in Sally's so she has seen her fair share of black women and you may be the first one she saw with well cared for hair. Her job may be the only time she is ever around black people. And lets not pretend that there isn't a bunch of chewed up heads amongst us black folks(off the board). Just saying :look:.


I agree with the statement above. The store clerk probably should not have let these words come out of her mouth but that is what many people think about our hair.

I live in predominately white area in the mid-west. A lady from work was having hair troubles (she was white) and I suggested a few things. During the converstation she asked me about my hair, I let her touch it and her exact words were "wow, it's actually very soft, how do you get it like that". She then told me she had a black friend that is also having trouble with her hair and and I gave advice for the friend as well.

Changing this perception will take time. The more that black women take care of their hair, the less we will hear statements like this.
 
I would go back and get her name, speak to the manager, call the regional manager...write to corporate, etc...I don't play mess like that. Like white chicks never have dry, brittle hair. *********...
 
I would like to know how you responded to her. IMO sometimes people wait too long to say something after the fact. I would have explained to her right then and there that what she said was not a compliment, but incredibly ignorant.
 
Yes, this caucasian sales rep at Sallys Beauty supply in Charlotte told me this when I was purchasing my silk elements condish. I went to the counter and casually said hi and asked how her day was going. So while pulling out my cash to pay for my items she stated, "there is no way that you can be all black, your hair is too soft, I have never seen a black woman walk in here with hair so bouncy and soft,theirs is always hard and brittle".

Wait...I live in Charlotte, NC and their are many, many, many women here with healthy hair. And the fact that my hair is soft has NOTHING to do with my race, all to do with hair care. I am mixed with black and blacker:yep: What I do not understand is why do some people not think before they talk???? This coment was not taken as a complement and she needs to take another HR training class on how to speek to customers. So offensive>>>

If something similar has happened to you, share your story....

Please tell me you checked her!!!
 
I have too many stories to even mention....Not worth getting my presha up! LOL

OP how do you respond or did you give her the Look?
 
Smh...just IGNORANT! When I was in high school, this caucasian guy was staring at me one day, so I said "What??" and he was like "If you put conditioner in your hair everyday, your hair would be like ours" Ugh. I had to tell him about himself, and what makes it so bad, he told me that several times until graduation. Smh. Idiot.
 
I always wonder why folks come on here and post stories like this....:rolleyes:

yeah...I wonder what her reaction to the "compliment" was as well....
 
I always wonder why folks come on here and post stories like this....:rolleyes:

yeah...I wonder what her reaction to the "compliment" was as well....

Me too. These stories get recycled every month - variations on the same theme. Look 'em up...

Cliff notes...
They all go like this
Someone said:
  • I look Asian
  • My kids must have a white/asian/hispanic papi
  • My hair is soo soft/long/curly/straight so I can't be fully black
  • How does my hair get so soft/long/curly/straight when both of my parents are black
  • I must be mixed because I have (insert valued trait here)
And responses go like this:
  • Yeah, that happens to me all the time. Ugh
  • I used to think the same thing before I came to LHCF
  • I can't believe this!
  • Well you do look mixed - your hair is soo soft/long/curly/straight
I'm trying not to be snarky but I sometimes wonder if these threads are veiled attempts at getting compliments. Maybe I'm wrong but I dunno.
 
OP, I'm sorry that happened to you. I agree with everyone who said to get her name, speak with a store & regional manager, as well as corporate. She needs to be checked--seriously.

I swear, it's too bad that mouths don't come with mute buttons because some people could surely use them.
 
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