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called "NAPPY HEADED & KINKY" by employers ..... any options?

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Um she wears a head scarf to work in a corporate environment? ( she is not wearing the scarf for religious reasons) She has 3c hair and she cannot brush up a neat bun? umm her style seems very sloppy to me. I know a lot naturals who work in corporate environments and their hair looks amazing. Her employer is wrong however she is not helping the situation when it comes to neatness. Actions should be taken against the supervisor, however the youtuber should mind her appearance at her job. I'm natural with a mid sized fro and I have to keep it professional and in my eyes what she demonstrated as her work style, its' a mess.
 
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Before watching the video, I have to say that I am a nappy-headed and kinky-haired chick and proud of it, so if anyone called me that, I'd have no problem at all with it.

Definition of nappy: tightly-coiled/curled
Definition of kinky: tightly-coiled/curled

I know having nappy hair wasn't always cool in the US because there were no tools to groom it so it always looked unkempt. I never had that problem so I've always loved and been proud to be nappy-haired/kinky.

Considering that those words are neutral definitive words in English, no matter what context they are used in, I don't think a lot can be done about one who complains about them. Imus added the word "ho" to his use of the words in an insulting context and I think that's where he crossed the line.

Just watched the video. Her hair doesn't look as kinky/nappy as mine. I know some people use "nappy" as a word to mean unkempt, so I'd like to see how she wears her hair to work when she's not wearing the scarf. As I've mentioned before, I think my hair looks unkempt when I do WNGs so if anyone called it ugly, I'd not disagree. Some styles have to grow on folks to become acceptable coz they just look like you didn't comb your hair.

In short, taking someone to court for calling them "nappy-headed" or "kinky-haired" I don't think would take one very far, unless the judge was someone who is still haunted by the history of when nappy was synonymous with unkempt. But then of course, if the hair does look messy then by that interpretation, the cap would fit so how would the "victim" defend herself. Incidentally, can someone take another to court for being told she doesn't look smart when she herself thinks she does? I mean, isn't this is like being called ugly when you yourself think you are good-looking. I guess all these can fall under "harassment" but unless one has a very good legal team, I think it's a long shot unless one can prove it causes a lot of distress and affects work performance.*shrug*

I think the YTer would feel less offended if she realized that the words are not insulting. Unless 4B hair is so ugly to her that she doesn't want to be associated with it, then I don't see how being called nappy-headed (like me) or kinky-haired (like me) is offensive.
 
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I have to wear a suit everyday and if I came in with a scarf at work, I would be getting all kinds of side-eyes.

Bunning is such an easy option, and it is a protective style which will aid with length retention.

If you work in a corporate environment you have to look the part. No one is going to respect someone with a scarf, unless it is for religious reasons.

I'm not saying that they have the right to called you nappy or something, but if your hair is presentable ie in a NEAT bun or rollerset or something like that, they should never have the NEED to say anything negative about your hair.
 
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I think its terrible and I commented on her YT..I was pissed watching...She has a law suit seriously and I would pursue it..

I also work in a corporate environment and my natural hair is not a problem. I wear WNG, bun, ponytail and its all very neat and professional. And even though her appearance isn't exactly neat or corporate, ur employer cant just say anything they want to you. Her supervisors personal opinion of natural hair should not be expressed unless it impeded on her ability to do her job. Should she tighten up her appearance YES...Is what the supervisor said inappropriate HELL YEAH.....Im sure that she has chicks on her job with ratty *** weaves and wigs and the supervisor didnt comment on them..Its discriminatory plain and simple..
 
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I think she is a member here. I wear tichels to work but i work in manufacturing. I dress modest but i would not wear them in a corporate setting. But still she should have not been called that. If they have a problem they could have addressed it in a professional manner.
 
Nonie said:
Before watching the video, I have to say that I am a nappy-headed and kinky-haired chick and proud of it, so if anyone called me that, I'd have no problem at all with it.

Definition of nappy: tightly-coiled/curled
Definition of kinky: tightly-coiled/curled

I know having nappy hair wasn't always cool in the US because there were no tools to groom it so it always looked unkempt. I never had that problem so I've always loved and been proud to be nappy-haired/kinky.

Considering that those words are neutral definitive words in English, no matter what context they are used in, I don't think a lot can be done about one who complains about them. Imus added the word "ho" to his use of the words in an insulting context and I think that's where he crossed the line.

Just watched the video. Her hair doesn't look as kinky/nappy as mine. I know some people use "nappy" as a word to mean unkempt, so I'd like to see how she wears her hair to work when she's not wearing the scarf. As I've mentioned before, I think my hair looks unkempt when I do WNGs so if anyone called it ugly, I'd not disagree. Some styles have to grow on folks to become acceptable coz they just look like you didn't comb your hair.

In short, taking someone to court for calling them "nappy-headed" or "kinky-haired" I don't think would take one very far, unless the judge was someone who is still haunted by the history of when nappy was synonymous with unkempt. And then of course, if the hair does look messy then by that interpretation, the cap fits. But also, can someone take another to court for being told she doesn't look smart when she herself thinks she does? I mean, isn't this is like being called ugly when you yourself think you are good-looking. I guess all these can fall under "harassment" but unless one has a very good legal team, I think it's a long shot unless one can prove it causes a lot of distress and affects work performance.*shrug*

I think the YTer would feel less offended if she realized that the words are not insulting. Unless 4B hair is so ugly to her that she doesn't want to be associated with it, then I don't see how being called nappy-headed (like me) or kinky-haired (like me) is offensive.
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hey Nonie bear!!:grin:
yeah I agree, (but certainly in my corporation it's harassment and ) tolerance of this is not:nono: accepted (there wording...ya'll know the spill)

This lady in my area would surely own a share of the company by now if she can prove these actions/harrassment occurred (j/k....kinda)

but I'm guessing the companies or states are allowed to sanction differently

not ok with me:sad: She looks very depressed IMO and that sits very low with me
 
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tHeHaIRLaB said:
hey Nonie bear!! yeah I agree, (but certainly in my corporation it's harassment and ) tolerance of this is not:nono: accepted (there wording...ya'll know the spill)

This lady in my area would surely own a share of the company by now if she can prove these actions/harrassment occurred

but I'm guessing the companies or states are allowed to sanction differently

not ok with me:sad:
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Again, I think we're on different wavelengths. Would you consider it harassment if you wore your hair straightened and were called "straight-haired"? I am guessing not. Why? Because that would be a true description of your hair. So why is it harassment if someone thinks my hair is tightly-coiled and calls it that?

I think the reason someone would consider it harassment is either because they are interpreting it to mean something more than "tightly coiled or tightly curled" which is precisely what those words mean; or they just do not like 4B hair or want anything to do with it, in which case it'd be offensive.

Would she be bothered if they called her curly-haired? Would it be considered harassment? Or does it become harassment when we go down the hair-type chart to the more tightly-coiled textures?
 
Where I work that would be a EEOC complaint and/or lawsuit. Unfortunately those words have negative connatation for many Blacks. That statement is culturally insensitive and could cause some people alot of anguish. I'd sue the living hell out of em!
She could do alot of things but nonetheless they broke a few EEOC rules here.

By the way I love my nappy kinky hair to death. Some folks are repulsed by it and others adore it. I had a sissy arse coworker tell me one morning I bet you cannot even comb that mess. LOL I didn't slap his arse because I know he is on crazy meds and at this moment he is likely dying from AIDs. He has way mo problems than being repulsed by my naps. LOL
 
I do not see a claim here for coming to work in a head scarf without a religious reason. Nor do I see a claim for coming to work with unkempt hair. It is not clear how she wears her hair to work (when not in the scarf). She even noted that the union rep cannot do much about this.....other than likely let this supervisor/manager know that his comments are offensive and send him to diversity training.

At most I would guess a hostile work environment claim due to the nappy headed comment being perceived as negative, but hostile work environment is very difficult to prove.

"There’s just a handful of ways in which you can define hostile work environment. Any act of sexual harassment on the part of bosses or co-workers can be viewed as hostile. Any act or remarks that are overtly discriminatory regarding age, race, gender, sexual orientation, or disability are also considered to create a hostile work environment."
What is a Hostile Work Environment?

This guy was able to sue due to discrimination (he would not cut his dreadlocks due to religious beliefs). 2 businesses sued for work discrimination - Roanoke.com

Facial hair policy lawsuit, discrimination based on disproportionate number of Black men affected due to skin conditions: HPD officers file suit over facial hair policy | Top stories | Chron.com - Houston Chronicle

Pending suit (guy fired due to cornrows): Abdul Jabbar Gbajiamilla Says Abercrombie Fired Him Over His Corn Rows; Federal Discrimination Suit Heading To Court - Los Angeles News - The Informer

No cornrows or long hair at Six Flags: WUSA9.com | Washington, DC | No Cornrows, Long Hair At Six Flags

I think that people sometimes blow things out of proportion and take offense when none was meant. I am not saying that happened in this instance; however, a comment from a colleague about 2 years ago set me off. I wrote out a long email telling him off, in a professional manner. After I calmed down, and prior to sending the email, I walked over to ask him what he meant by the comment and he had a good explanation that ended up not being offensive at all. Basically he liked my straight weave much more than my natural hair.

Unless and until I hear more about this supervisor and the context of the comments, I cannnot presume that he was being overtly discriminatory by calling her kinky haired or nappy-headed.
 
Qtee said:
I think its terrible and I commented on her YT..I was pissed watching...She has a law suit seriously and I would pursue it..

I also work in a corporate environment and my natural hair is not a problem. I wear WNG, bun, ponytail and its all very neat and professional. And even though her appearance isn't exactly neat or corporate, ur employer cant just say anything they want to you. Her supervisors personal opinion of natural hair should not be expressed unless it impeded on her ability to do her job. Should she tighten up her appearance YES...Is what the supervisor said inappropriate HELL YEAH.....Im sure that she has chicks on her job with ratty *** weaves and wigs and the supervisor didnt comment on them..Its discriminatory plain and simple..
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OK, I probably missed something. What did the supervisor/employers say exactly? From the video, (I'll watch it again in case I misheard) I thought she just said that they've been calling her nappy-headed. Did she/they say more than that?

I just watched it again. She said her supervisor has been commenting about her having nappy or kinky hair. :look: OK...? Commenting how? "You have nappy or kinky hair." Like that?
 
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I think it harassment when i KNOW for a FACT that someone is calling me nappyheaded in order to make me feel bad. I don't like the term nappyheaded honestly....you might as well call me a ****** too.

I understand where you're coming from Nonie... i do....but that term nappyheaded would not sit well with me at all esp if my boss called me that out of malice. I'd speed dial the DM or HR quick fast in a hurry.

I know being natural is really new to a lot of ppl....but some things just can't be tolerated.
 
SmilingElephant said:
I think it harassment when i KNOW for a FACT that someone is calling me nappyheaded in order to make me feel bad. I don't like the term nappyheaded honestly....you might as well call me a ****** too.

I understand where you're coming from Nonie... i do....but that term nappyheaded would not sit well with me at all esp if my boss called me that out of malice. I'd speed dial the DM or HR quick fast in a hurry.

I know being natural is really new to a lot of ppl....but some things just can't be tolerated.
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The term "nappy-headed" offends you. OK. But that's not even what she said. She said her "supervisor has been commenting about [her] having nappy or kinky hair"--her exact words. She didn't say her supervisor calls her "nappy-headed".
 
If someone commented on my "nappy" hair I would be mad as a wet hen!!! I hate that word! If it was my boss I would get and attorney and contact HR..... I am not saying it would win in court but in my company it would never get to court they would settle that soooo fast... How unprofessional and this was at your work place during work hours? Crazy!
I can hear me now, So&So said my hair was nappy... I feel that is a derogatory word used only by prejudice people to describe black hair... I feel singled out because of my color and I am too embarrassed to work with her ever again....Whine whine whine paid time off....... (I also hate my job so my advice is jaded)
 
arosieworld said:
If someone commented on my "nappy" hair I would be mad as a wet hen!!! I hate that word! If it was my boss I would get and attorney and contact HR..... I am not saying it would win in court but in my company it would never get to court they would settle that soooo fast... How unprofessional and this was at your work place during work hours? Crazy!
I can hear me now, So&So said my hair was nappy... I feel that is a derogatory word used only by prejudice people to describe black hair... I feel singled out because of my color and I am too embarrassed to work with her ever again....Whine whine whine paid time off....... (I also hate my job so my advice is jaded)
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OK, that made me laugh. :giggle:
 
Nonie said:
The term "nappy-headed" offends you. OK. But that's not even what she said. She said her "supervisor has been commenting about [her] having nappy or kinky hair"--her exact words. She didn't say her supervisor calls her "nappy-headed".
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Oh...:look::D.....okay, my bad... but still....she's depressed by the boss' comments. Being a supervisor....they still should have some tact about how they come at their employees. Plus she stated that her "particular supervisor" frowns upon natural hair....so i can't even imagine what kind of torment she must be going through:nono:...you should never feel that way when you go to work...worrying about what obstacles your boss is gonna put you through....isn't that mental abuse?? It's causing you added stress that you don't need on top of the regular stress you get from being at work. I think the boss is just mean....why do they put ppl like that in those positions yo? Seriously.....these types of ppl don't know the definition of mercy!!!
 
I did not hear her say she worked in corporate unless I missed that. If she is out of dress code that should be addressed in a professional manner but any comments on ones hair texure is not necessary at all in the work environment . I think nappy is an inappropriate term for the supervisor to use. She sounds like she is on the verge of tears when talking about it and it seems like she started covering her hair because of the comments. I'm not sure though because she doesn't go in much detail.
 
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If she works where I think she works by some key things she said in her vid on it being a union job and in a comment the amount of money she makes. I worked there-could be another building, but if it's what I think the work environment is totally casual. She could come in wearing anything-although I didn't see anyone in a scarf-there was no dress code-although I always did dress regarless, ppl come in with their hair however in whatever clothes-cause the job is not appearance related.
 
oh and trust me the Union might not be able to do anything right off, but it's like building a case, nobody can be harrassed, she blew the whistle the loudest she could, it's documented, trust if it does continue, I don't see the Union just allowing mistreatment, if it's the place I'm thinking of, the supervisors are not Union, no back up for their job. I know the Union might be not making drastic moves, or maybe she needs to see another rep,but they will consider it duly noted. This does not need to be a case where we all get up in arms. Not when there is a Union involved. I don't think they can just make a move on one complaint, they have to investigate. And no , not to my knowledge would any of that behavior be tolerated. We are in a bad economy though and ppl have to watch their own backs. A name or , just words, ain't worth losing your check. It is worth taking the steps to avoid the treatment in the future-I don't think we have the whole story- I don't know what she expects the Union to do right away. Especially only on one claim , from one person, no witnesses, but they would need the time to prove anything.

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if this is the place I'm thinking , no supervisor has any business making any comment about anybody's appearance. with no dress code.....:perplexed
 
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Irresistible said:
oh and trust me the Union might not be able to do anything right off, but it's like building a case, nobody can be harrassed, she blew the whistle the loudest she could, it's documented, trust if it does continue, I don't see the Union just allowing mistreatment, if it's the place I'm thinking of, the supervisors are not Union, no back up for their job. I know the Union might be not making drastic moves, or maybe she needs to see another rep,but they will consider it duly noted. This does not need to be a case where we all get up in arms. Not when there is a Union involved. I don't think they can just make a move on one complaint, they have to investigate. And no , not to my knowledge would any of that behavior be tolerated. We are in a bad economy though and ppl have to watch their own backs. A name or , just words, ain't worth losing your check. It is worth taking the steps to avoid the treatment in the future-I don't think we have the whole story- I don't know what she expects the Union to do right away. Especially only on one claim , from one person, no witnesses, but they would need the time to prove anything.

Edit
if this is the place I'm thinking , no supervisor has any business making any comment about anybody's appearance. with no dress code.....:perplexed
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i think we're thinking the same place, and i worked there handling corporate complaints in college... i agree w/ what u said, that's y I didn't understand her feeling of helplessness
feelings of HELPLESSNESS often leads to FEELINGS OF DEPRESSION... which can lead to something much worse
 
Ms Lala said:
I did not hear her say she worked in corporate unless I missed that. If she is out of dress code that should be addressed in a professional manner but any comments on ones hair texure is not necessary at all in the work environment . I think nappy is an inappropriate term for the supervisor to use. She sounds like she is on the verge of tears when talking about it and it seems like she started covering her hair because of the comments. I'm not sure though because she doesn't go in much detail.
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Starting at 1:45, she says that she works in a corporate environment.

And I think the supervisor is dead wrong. That's all there is to it.
Folks can take a brand new stance on it, and be all...ohhh well her hair is kinky and the supervisor is just calling it what it is, but come on son.
Like...come. on.
The words that were said don't have as much meaning as the intent that were behind the words. If the supervisor is trying to embarrass and insult the girl, then the actual words that were said are irrelevant.

Even though they are the exact same words, someone saying "oh your hair looks nice :grin:" is not the same as, " Oh. :blush::perplexed Your hair looks....nice...:rolleyes: :look:"

Intent and inflection are everything, and when the supervisor is saying nappy and kinky, she is not saying it in the denotative way, as in tightly coiled hair. And you can assume that, because the supervisor does not like natural hair. Clearly, she isn't gonna be talking about it all objectively. When she says nappy, she is saying it in the connotative way, as in bad, ugly, hot mess, low class, etc.

I'm not offended by the word nappy itself, and at times, I myself look at my new growth and consider its nappiness.
But if others are walking around, calling my head nappy, and they clearly mean it in a derogatory or cruel way, hell no I'm not gonna be okay with that crap. I don't know any self-respecting person who would be.

This lady is clearly distressed and going through some emotional pain over this ongoing situation. Just talking about it, she's about to burst into tears. So I don't understand how people can be so callous, as to say that it's her fault for "being sloppy". The scarf came about partially because of the comments, it wasn't the other way around. So, I don't know how people can assume that she was looking sloppy at work and that's why the supervisor started going in on her. Additionally, even if she wasn't looking nice, then the supervisor needed to step to her about her dress code, not the texture of her hair. They're different. People need to dress appropriately for the office. Nobody should have to change the texture of her hair.
 
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There is a video somewhere around YT where someone gives the legal standards for discrimination and hair texture is in there. I can't for the life of me remember who did the video but in their case, I think she had a twist out and her manager sent her home saying that customers could sue them for letting her work there with a twistout.
 
If I'm understanding it correctly, her boss called her hair "nappy" before she began wearing the scarves. In that case, it may not matter to her boss if she wears a nice bun or not. The style won't necessarily change the texture.
 
*shudder*

See her YT name "tastiredbone" yeah..chick is Klassy!

Nuff said... Oh..What was this about her hair?? Lol :p
 
tHeHaIRLaB said:
i think we're thinking the same place, and i worked there handling corporate complaints in college... i agree w/ what u said, that's y I didn't understand her feeling of helplessness
feelings of HELPLESSNESS often leads to FEELINGS OF DEPRESSION... which can lead to something much worse
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I think it was all to casually mentioned with no background, I understand anybody wanting to help or defend the situation

I also think she can get in trouble for casually mentioning it on the internet, since some ppl will know where she works and can prove it's her saying it.....I'm really not sure how that would work tho

I understand the frustration, but also this seems to be a bit of internalizing going on. It's wrong(the situation), but to be depressed....well I don't know. I do know I would be Irate tho, let someone say something out of line about my hair :kick: The union would be doing something.....I wouldnt be depressed tho

nappy is relative, some would call any black person's hair nappy, wrong yes, but would we get depressed or mad? Me keeping in context of how it was meant, if it was truly meant racially-man forget that, I would do professional report to every union rep and the higher ups. Maybe someone can tell her that....whistle blower like a mugg.....someone would be doing something. If she feels helpless, she has to know this can't continue, I would not go around the supervisor without a witness and would ask the union to make it be that way.
 
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