Wwhy do people never praise you to your face?

[Penspringz]

This is more of a general relationship question in the sense that it applies to relationships with colleagues, friends and partners but I have noticed that people rarely speak well of me to my face. Rather, they will praise other people in front of me but praise me to other people.

I am really keen on praising people to their face. If somebody has achieved something or is good at something I would rather tell them directly than speak about them to others.

 

[firecracker]

Uh maybe they don't want your head to get too big . Be glad their praising you to others instead of stabbing you in the back. Why do you feel the need for praise from others anyways? I'm not trying to be snarky either.

 

[Solti]

I agree. I think its hateful not to give compliments directly to the person. I think its insecurity on their part.

 

[brownsugarflyygirl]

I think its the big head thing. They dont want it to go to your head.... Im happy when it gets back to me that people say nice things. The only person that does this and it bothers me is my dad....he is always pushing me to do better but others say he always talks about how proud of me he is...I guess thats just his approach

 

[Theo]

I think its the big head thing. They dont want it to go to your head.... Im happy when it gets back to me that people say nice things. The only person that does this and it bothers me is my dad....he is always pushing me to do better but others say he always talks about how proud of me he is...I guess thats just his approach

My parents do the same thing. Just today I found out about something that I was really excited about. First thing I did was call my parents cuz I thought they'd be excited too... guess again. I felt dumb for calling them in the first place.

2 hours later my younger sister is calling and congratulating me, saying that my mom is sooooo excited and can't stop talking about it. I was like... erplexed