Why Would You Want to be Celibate?

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

If you were in a serious relationship, what reasons would you have to be celibate, aside from religious and moral purposes?

What would make you change your perspective and move away from celibacy?

 

[mango387]

I am the type person who CATCHES everything (ringworm, chicken pox, viruses, etc.), and I have A COMPLETE FEAR OF STDs. I am Christian, but my fear of catching an STD keeps me a little more. I have been in a serious relationship that could have gone there, BUT I couldn't do it. I had my "wilder" friends laughing, because I told them I would have been the one nut who wound up pregnant with crabs and syphilis...

ETA-Now in marriage, it's a different story. I know you can still get an STD, but...

 

[HeChangedMyName]

Aside from religious reasons I would say

1. Lack of trust for your partner: If you thought they were nasty and sleeping around, then of course you wouldn't want to be sharing
2. Fear of STD's: If your partner is not the type to EVER get a check-up, they could be carrying any and everything
3. Just didn't like sex. I've heard that there are some people that just don't like sex for some reason
4. Living arrangements: maybe you live with your parents/roomates, and your partner does too, you are both broke and can't afford a room, and neither one of you has a car, and both of you are scared to death of having relations outside.
5. You really are not attracted to your partner: Maybe you are just using them for some other reason, money, status, etc.

 

[Divine Inspiration]

You said religous/moral reasons aside so...

-I DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT want kids right now. PERIOD. Abstinence is the only fail proof birth control. For me, having sex with a man who is not my husband is not worth the risk of getting pregnant and playing the waiting game with my cycle every month.

-I have a personal thing about self-preservation. I consider sex to be a sacred, soul-tying act so I'd like to reserve that for a man who is willing to make a more meaningful commitment than carrying the title of boyfriend.

-Like kids, I do NOT want any STDs. It's just not worth it to me. There will come a time when doing the mutual testing and sharing thing will be apprpriate. Now is not that time.

-Sex clouds judgment. At this point in my life, I'm marriage-minded so I'm looking at a man's character, lifestyle, values, etc. Sex makes certain relationship decisions more complicated than they have to be. It's easier to overlook glaring personality flaws and red flags when you're sharing the intimacy of sex.

I don't see anything short of marriage moving me away from my celibacy. Every time I get hot and bothered, I think about kids or how it would feel to be told I'm HIV+ and suddenly my hormones calm down.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

....because my inner masochist thinks sexual tension is hot.......

The only reason I can think of.

 

[Farida]

- Sex can be a very bonding experience and sometimes it is hard to remain objective about your relationship when you are intimate.

- Fear of unwanted/unplanned pregnancy.

 

[Everything Zen]

1. I need to complete therapy first. Engaging in sex before doing this could make things worse for my mental health and dealing with the past.

2. Absolutely do not want children at this point in my life. I'm on YAZ but still nothing is 100%. I'm thinking about the sponge as a back up when I do plan on having sex.

Caveat: I don't think I could ever get an abortion, but you never know.

3. I would like to be married or at least engaged (mostly for spiritual reasons) but I don't think it's going to happen for me.

4. Even MisterMan who has never been in a celibate relationship before says that it's a good thing and it makes our relationship stronger and more intimate.