Why Ms Independent Cant Find Mr Right

This is the second time I've seen a topic like this today. I feel like Jesus is trying to tell me something. A big part of me wants to resist this message because it makes me feel like we are reversing roles and pursuing men. This makes it so easy for men. Not only do we have to look pretty, be educated, happy, emotionally healthy, funny, etc we also have to initiate the contact with the men and bear the burden of rejection. It doesn't make sense and from my experience with men whenever I initiated contact that person was either not interested or was taken, but like I said I think Jesus is trying to tell me something. I actually did the "you choose he chases" method at a networking event a few months ago. I got turned down, but I did have a really great conversation with a cute guy, that makes me smile to this day (cause I was so darn funny) and he was really smart so maybe that's saying something. I guess it doesn't hurt to do a mixture of waiting and persuing at least it makes you feel like you have some type of control of the situation.
 
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I wish they would have showed the "bae" she kept pointing to. I bet he was sitting there, chest pumped up, looking like he was the prize while she did a whole speech about how she snagged him. :lol: I also have other thoughts about this clip, but they might be too petty. Overall, I don't think this is a good idea for women. It sets you up to be seriously rejected. That shouldn't be a part of a woman's life experience, imo.
 
Ipanema said:
I wish they would have showed the "bae" she kept pointing to. I bet he was sitting there, chest pumped up, looking like he was the prize while she did a whole speech about how she snagged him. :lol: I also have other thoughts about this clip, but they might be too petty. Overall, I don't think this is a good idea for women. It sets you up to be seriously rejected. That shouldn't be a part of a woman's life experience, imo.
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From her Instagram!
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Tired of listening to what I am doing wrong as a woman. All these k ow it all people telling us only if we have done it this way...that way ...etc . I feel like listening to these type of messages is gonna distroy females sense of self. How many things do we need to be in life . It’s seriously exhausting.
 
She makes good points.

I agree w/some....and I'm kind of on the fence about others.

"Men approach less than they did just 10 years ago..." - Wow...that's a sobering thought. :look: But it makes sense. :nono:

I think part of it not just because women are less "approachable", but also because with the influx of social media, texting and dating apps, most men don't HAVE to approach in person anymore.
 
I'll be honest..... Anytime I've flirted first/initiated/or thought about trying to snag a dude, he always turned out to be either:

-Taken already
-Married
-Not interested
-Lukewarm
-Maybe even gay lol :lol:


I'm not saying women should just sit around twiddling their thumbs waiting and praying on "the lord" to bring them someone, but maybe it would be best to at least find out if he's even single first. :look:

I'm torn on this issue because the men who have seemed to be most interested in me have been the one to initiate things simply when I've been open, friendly, engaging, and fun. But I'm not knocking her way of doing things. I know women who do get men her way as well.
 
Part of me is ok with this. Women do choose and men chase. In fact, I hear so many people complain about how hard it is to make friends as an adult and so much of it is we are likely not projecting an openness to it. We aren't making the "first move" one way or another.

I'm making it my business to be charming and sweet to everyone, focusing specifically on when I dont want to. It has led to more women wanting to be my friend and men wanting to get to know me. I sift through the men putting them in piles married/taken (networking or toss) or single (dateable, friendzone or toss). Its allowed me to meet more people (outside of work) in what is going to be my home for a while.

Last year when I was here and I wasnt in the mood to meet new people or socialize. If I met someone new it was through my ex or people who were persistent enough to push through my barriers that I had no choice but to let them in. I know I missed out not being my best self in those moments.
 
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RoundEyedGirl504 said:
Chasing feels unsettling to me. Like something in my gut says naw don't do that LOL! Frankly I have never seen a relationship from the outside, where the woman did that and it looked like a win for her. But to each her own!
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Yeah. I don't think I would ever approach a guy in the gym like she did, but smiling saying hello if he speaks, letting him know it's ok to talk to me....then yeah. I'm on board.

But her scenario makes me wonder after she gave him her card, did she call him first too. I feel like how you start is how its sustained.

Men already have to do so little these days. It seems like they want women to jump through all these.hoops because they're doing us a favor by getting into a committed relationship....but that's all they're doing and.in some cases they aren't doing that.
 
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