Why is your hair nappy?

[Nonie]

Naheda, no one is trying to make you use the word to describe your hair, but I think what folks are trying to lay out in plain sight is that because the word has the same meaning as the word kinky, it is a word that people will use to describe your hair without any malice whatsoever. Perhaps if they do, to your face, you can explain to them that you do not like it. But rather than have everyone walking on eggshells around you because a simple English word that brings to mind kinky is offensive to you, perhaps you too can make an effort to see from their point of view that when they say it, they mean it in kindness and total neutrality. In other words, they will try not to use it to describe your hair, but should they slip because they are doing unto you as they would like done unto them (in this case, calling a spade a spade) because they'd call their own the same, please note the source and see that no harm is intended.

Naheda, so far, I've assumed I know why the word is negative to you. But I realize that I might not and I'll respect you enough to ask you why it is. What about the word offends you so? You say we might be younger than you so don't understand. Please enlighten us. I mean this with all the respect in the world. When I watched 400 Years Without a Comb, I understood why having nappy hair was a curse. I could see how the word could change from just describing the texture to being a word that meant bad, because nappy hair looked a hot mess back then. So no one wanted to have nappy hair. But outside of that, where meaning went from being a description of texture to a description of state (negative appearance), then I don't think I get it. So please, can you tell us when and why the word became/is negative to you? TIA

 

[naheda72]

Hmmm....it seem as if it was you who was trying to convince others that black people don't have nappy hair. Others was just laying out (whether you like the word or not) black people hair is nappy and it doesn't have to be negative -- it's just a description. I don't know if your hair is nappy because it will be me (I) who decide depending on how it looks. Now, maybe your hair isn't nappy to you but it can be nappy to others and you can't escape that. How do you describe other people (black) hair when you see it. Have you ever called it kinky or woolly. Have you ever thought that those black people may have found it offensive to describe their hair that way. Have you ever thought that there are black people who had negative experience with the word kinky and woolly...or is it only your experience or feelings that count. My point is you can't escape things that you may not like such as the word 'nappy.' That word gives a description and help express objects for better understanding just like every other adjective. Black people like yourself can't make the word 'nappy' diappear just as much as a white person can't make the word 'stringy' disappear.

Sorry, but it appears to be you more than anyone trying to convince the other way around. I said I did not want it referred to MY hair only. You can call your hair anything you want, that is not my concern. I really didn't read your whole response after the first sentence, but nappy is negative in my opinion and I see it as unkempt hair. If I rolled out of bed and my hair was stuck to my head and I had lint balls in it, then I may feel I deserve to be categorized as nappy. And by the way my daughter's hair is a 3c/4a and she is kinky and no one has EVER thought about describing her as nappy. To say that everyone would consider those words as synonymous is ludacris.

 

[Nonie]

You know, I'd never heard the word 'kinky' to describe hair either . I just thought of it as afro frizzy hair really, I just never thought much about my hair. But still, I've never really heard anyone in real life round here call hair 'nappy' or 'kinky', do you suppose it might be an American thing?

I know "nappy" is an American thing. I learned "kinky" from my Kenyan mother, who had never been to America till just two years ago, way back when I was very young. Not sure where that is from.

 

[Nonie]

Sorry, but it appears to be you more than anyone trying to convince the other way around. I said I did not want it referred to MY hair only. You can call your hair anything you want, that is not my concern. I really didn't read your whole response after the first sentence, but nappy is negative in my opinion and I see it as unkempt hair. If I rolled out of bed and my hair was stuck to my head and I had lint balls in it, then I may feel I deserve to be categorized as nappy. And by the way my daughter's hair is a 3c/4a and she is kinky and no one has EVER thought about describing her as nappy. To say that everyone would consider those words as synonymous is ludacris.

I think you just answered my question with that bold line. And it does confirm that my understanding of why people hate the word nappy, including you, is as I learned from the movie 400 Years Without a Comb. Naheda, do you know why the word "nappy" came to be associated with the word "unkempt" even if it had nothing to do with that?

 

[kmn1980]

Again, you can call your hair what you want to call it, just do bring it to me. Common sense dictates that if the "nap" of the textile was the same smoothness with the same integrity of the rest of the fabric, there'd be no need for it to be removed. Obviously, the nap was something that was either functionally or aesthetically problematic.

Now, I've heard white folx refer to their own hair as "nappy" when it's unkempt. I also know white folx who have 4a (bordering on 4b) hair who do not refer to it as "nappy". Don't call my hair something that a) it's not and b) has a negative connotation regardless of what the Old/Middle/New English says it means. Hell, it's been argued that the n-word comes from *****rd meaning "stingy" or "mean" but if someone calls me one(no matter how stingy or mean I've been with them) and tells me I shouldn't mind because the technical definition just means stingy I hope they know the Old/Middle/New English for "snaggletoothed" after they get finished eating pavement.

ETA: On the issue of "kinky", one could say it's problematic because when there is a problem, it is called a "kink"; ie. "I wanted to go to Jamaica but there was a kink in the plans."

That's all.

 

[knt1229]

Did anybody actually watch the video? It's funny and it's not a discussion on what nappy hair is or isn't. It addresses folk who make negative comments about natural hair. It's a very funny and entertaining cartoon.

 

[naheda72]

Naheda, no one is trying to make you use the word to describe your hair, but I think what folks are trying to lay out in plain sight is that because the word has the same meaning as the word kinky, it is a word that people will use to describe your hair without any malice whatsoever. Perhaps if they do, to your face, you can explain to them that you do not like it. But rather than have everyone walking on eggshells around you because a simple English word that brings to mind kinky is offensive to you, perhaps you too can make an effort to see from their point of view that when they say it, they mean it in kindness and total neutrality. In other words, they will try not to use it to describe your hair, but should they slip because they are doing unto you as they would like done unto them (in this case, calling a spade a spade) because they'd call their own the same, please note the source and see that no harm is intended.


Naheda, so far, I've assumed I know why the word is negative to you. But I realize that I might not and I'll respect you enough to ask you why it is. What about the word offends you so? You say we might be younger than you so don't understand. Please enlighten us. I mean this with all the respect in the world. When I watched 400 Years Without a Comb, I understood why having nappy hair was a curse. I could see how the word could change from just describing the texture to being a word that meant bad, because nappy hair looked a hot mess back then. So no one wanted to have nappy hair. But outside of that, where meaning went from being a description of texture to a description of state (negative appearance), then I don't think I get it. So please, can you tell us when and why the word became/is negative to you? TIA

I thought I was entering into the conversation to say I agree or disagree with the usage for me. It then became a conversation directed towards convincing me that I was wrong or uneducated about the word. The word ignorant can be neutral too, but I wouldn't go around telling a person who did not know about a particular topic, "You are ignorant". Nappy from its usage from people IRL is umkempt, matted, uncombed, etc, hair. It has been stated in some definitions that the N word was derived from words meaning black, but IRL it is negative(although some try to claim as positive). To me the origin or the original meaning is not relevant, it is its usage IRL that matters. To me real life usage is the definition that many follow. So while kinky may be negative to some or in other countries, etc., I don't find IRL for it to be negative for me, thus I choose to use it. As I stated before my daughter's hair IS kinky, but I have yet to find someone to reference it as 'nappy'. To claim they are synonymous in their usage, in my experience, is just not true.

 

[Celestial]

Sorry, but it appears to be you more than anyone trying to convince the other way around. I said I did not want it referred to MY hair only. You can call your hair anything you want, that is not my concern. I really didn't read your whole response after the first sentence, but nappy is negative in my opinion and I see it as unkempt hair. If I rolled out of bed and my hair was stuck to my head and I had lint balls in it, then I may feel I deserve to be categorized as nappy. And by the way my daughter's hair is a 3c/4a and she is kinky and no one has EVER thought about describing her as nappy. To say that everyone would consider those words as synonymous is ludacris.

I already know that you are sensitive and have a inferior complex so I will be light with you. I have to assume that you are taking the word 'nappy' and applying it however you like. There is no evidence that the word 'nappy' means unkempt or lint balls in hair. That is your weak spirit and low self-esteem inflicting negative thoughts unto yourself. Nappy simply means knotted or tightly curled or kinked. No dear, it is not ludacris for someone to consider kinky and nappy synonymous because they ARE! Only people who are unknowledgeable of the two words and its meaning would think they aren't synonymous like yourself. Don't try to make yourself look innocent for calling someone hair kinky because that person may find it offensive just as much you find nappy offensive. It seems like you're saying "I can call people hair kinky, but they can't call my hair nappy." Kinky and Nappy is the same thing and has the same meaning. You want to look innocent for using the word 'kinky' and want others to look guilty for using the word 'nappy.' I asked you is it only your experience and feelings that count. Since you said your hair is kinky then I take that as nappy because I know that kinky and nappy is the same thing and have the same appearance. No I do not think your hair is unkempt or has lint in it but I do believe because of its kinky structure that it looks tightly curled, wiry, or knotty. How do you know what people thought of your daughter hair? They probably see it as kinky but no different than nappy. Why haven't you answered any of the questions I asked. What about those black people who had bad experience with the word kinky and grew up around people who used that word to describe their hair negatively. Do you go around calling black people hair kinky because you believe it's correct and that's how you describe yours. If so, then you aren't any different than those who choose to use the word nappy. Have you ever thought there are blacks that find the word kinky offensive? or the word woolly?

 

[Celestial]

Now, I've heard white folx refer to their own hair as "nappy" when it's unkempt. I also know white folx who have 4a (bordering on 4b) hair who do not refer to it as "nappy". That's all.

I don't believe the bolded but I've heard white people call their hair knotty (same as nappy) when it gets tangled and I think they are correct. What is the unkempt part. Is it tangled hair? I don't believe any white person would call their hair 'nappy' if it is not tangled or matted.

 

[naheda72]

I already know that you are sensitive and have a inferior complex so I will be light with you. I have to assume that you are taking the word 'nappy' and applying it however you like. There is no evidence that the word 'nappy' means unkempt or lint balls in hair. That is your weak spirit and low self-esteem inflicting negative thoughts unto yourself. Nappy simply means knotted or tightly curled or kinked. No dear, it is not ludacris for someone to consider kinky and nappy synonymous because they ARE! Only people who are unknowledgeable of the two words and its meaning would think they aren't synonymous like yourself. Don't try to make yourself look innocent for calling someone hair kinky because that person may find it offensive just as much you find nappy offensive. It seems like you're saying "I can call people hair kinky, but they can't call my hair nappy." Kinky and Nappy is the same thing and has the same meaning. You want to look innocent for using the word 'kinky' and want others to look guilty for using the word 'nappy.' I asked you is it only your experience and feelings that count. Since you said your hair is kinky then I take that as nappy because I know that kinky and nappy is the same thing and have the same appearance. No I do not think your hair is unkempt or has lint in it but I do believe because of its kinky structure that it looks tightly curled, wiry, or knotty. How do you know what people thought of your daughter hair? They probably see it as kinky but no different than nappy. Why haven't you answered any of the questions I asked. What about those black people who had bad experience with the word kinky and grew up around people who used that word to describe their hair negatively. Do you go around calling black people hair kinky because you believe it's correct and that's how you describe yours. If so, then you aren't any different than those who choose to use the word nappy. Have you ever thought there are blacks that find the word kinky offensive? or the word woolly?

This is really funny, because I choose not associate myself with lint balls in my hair as you may, I have a complex. You really don't deserve answers to your questions, but I will give you one. I don't refer to anyone's hair as anything but natural. That is it. The kinky reference is for me. Just as you have the choice to be nappy and unkempt, I have the choice to be kinky. Simple as that. The unkempt description is for you. If you choose to reference me as your definition, I choose to reference you with mine.

 

[Nonie]

Kmn, what about that nap that is deliberately created because it is considered to make garments beautiful? When nap refers to fabric like velvet or fabrics like it, it is not referring to the rough or the smooth. It is just referring to the fact that the fabric has raised fibers that feel smooth when stroked in one direction and feel rough when stroked in another. Someone who is into sewing reminded me of when my mom was teaching me how to place material on a pattern just before you cut it out, and how you have to pay attention on the placement of the material if it has nap.

You keep talking of people removing nap when I have oodles of references where the nap is created in textile making. No one removes nap from velvet but rather it is the nap that makes it a special fabric. If it were not there, the fabric would not be velvet and we all know that velvet is a fabric sought after by designers for a particular look they are going for.

As for white folks describing their hair as nappy, it all stems back to the fact that the hair we describe as kinky was always unkempt in the past. They could just as well have called their unkempt hair "tightly coiled black people's hair" because back in the day, this hair that we now call 4B was never anything but unkempt in the US. There was not a tool that could be used on this white man's land on that texture majority of black folk grow on their head. No wonder it came to be associated with ugliness.

 

[Celestial]

Nappy from its usage from people IRL is umkempt, matted, uncombed, etc, hair. It has been stated in some definitions that the N word was derived from words meaning black, but IRL it is negative(although some try to claim as positive). To me the origin or the original meaning is not relevant, it is its usage IRL that matters. To me real life usage is the definition that many follow. So while kinky may be negative to some or in other countries, etc., I don't find IRL for it to be negative for me, thus I choose to use it.

In real life people use the word kinky and woolly negatively, so is it right for you to call your hair something that people use negatively? Is it okay for you to call another black person hair kinky though IRL the word was applied to her/him negatively? I'm one of those people IRL and communicate and socialize with people IRL and the word nappy isn't unkempt, matted, or uncombed. You keep saying I then turn around a make generalizations as ALL. Don't play a hypocrite. I say IRL the word is neutral. It's only negative to people with low-self esteem and a inferior complex and a weak spirit. Origins of a word DOES matter because that is how contexts are used...based on its origins. Even if your hair was uncombed and matted then nappy still would be the correct word since uncombed and matted afro hair is indeed knotted or nappy. Maybe IRL kinky isn't negative to you so I guess you don't have to watch your tongue before using it if it is negative to others? I guess it is only your experience and feelings that count and screw everyone else.

In real life the word 'dark' can be used negatively so do people suppose to call someone chocolate versus dark because they were teased for being dark? I guess you will argue to not call anyone dark because IRL it is used negatively. Or don't call someone Latino because IRL it is used negatively; or the word pale because IRL it is used negatively; or gypsy because IRL it is used negatively. Grow up.

 

[Celestial]

This is why I say MY experience.

You actually said "it is (kinky) the right description for OUR hair. I'm telling you it is only your opinion. A lot of black people find kinky incorrect to describe their hair.

 

[Celestial]

This is really funny, because I choose not associate myself with lint balls in my hair as you may, I have a complex. You really don't deserve answers to your questions, but I will give you one. I don't refer to anyone's hair as anything but natural. That is it. The kinky reference is for me. Just as you have the choice to be nappy and unkempt, I have the choice to be kinky. Simple as that. The unkempt description is for you. If you choose to reference me as your definition, I choose to reference you with mine.

Hmmm...I think you are trolling. There is no way you can back track, lie, and change the subject unless you deliberately do it. I already told you what I feel about nappy hair so I think you already know unkempt is nothing I implied. Yeah, you're trolling.

 

[naheda72]

In real life people use the word kinky and woolly negatively, so is it right for you to call your hair something that people use negatively? Is it okay for you to call another black person hair kinky though IRL the word was applied to her/him negatively? I'm one of those people IRL and communicate and socialize with people IRL and the word nappy isn't unkempt, matted, or uncombed. You keep saying I then turn around a make generalizations as ALL. Don't play a hypocrite. I say IRL the word is neutral. It's only negative to people with low-self esteem and a inferior complex and a weak spirit. Origins of a word DOES matter because that is how contexts are used...based on its origins. Even if your hair was uncombed and matted then nappy still would be the correct word since uncombed and matted afro hair is indeed knotted or nappy. Maybe IRL kinky isn't negative to you so I guess you don't have to watch your tongue before using it if it is negative to others? I guess it is only your experience and feelings that count and screw everyone else.

In real life the word 'dark' can be used negatively so do people suppose to call someone chocolate versus dark because they were teased for being dark? I guess you will argue to not call anyone dark because IRL it is used negatively. Or don't call someone Latino because IRL it is used negatively; or the word pale because IRL it is used negatively; or gypsy because IRL it is used negatively. Grow up.

I don't bite my tongue because IRL nappy IS negative, maybe not to everyone and I did not say it to be. IRL NAPPY IS NEGATIVE. If not then why the controversy. Did you not read what I wrote, I said that I refer to MY hair as KINKY, others as NATURAL. And if someone called my hair nappy, yes I will say something, it is offensive and I don't see my hair as unkempt. The problem is you are trying to convince me that I should use that word instead of being happy with you using that word for yourself. I don't want to be that militant natural that you appear to be. Your constant accusations that I am weak with low self esteem is really hilarious. I am a dark skinned natural with kinky hair and always fierce. But if badgering me, uplifts you, then I hope your self esteem rises, because you seem like you need this. Really

 

[naheda72]

You actually said "it is (kinky) the right description for OUR hair. I'm telling you it is only your opinion. A lot of black people find kinky incorrect to describe their hair.

What are you talking about? It is OK if you didn't read my post in its entirety, I didn't half read yours, but you should do that if you are going to quote.

 

[Celestial]

I don't bite my tongue because IRL nappy IS negative, maybe not to everyone and I did not say it to be. IRL NAPPY IS NEGATIVE. If not then why the controversy. Did you not read what I wrote, I said that I refer to MY hair as KINKY, others as NATURAL. And if someone called my hair nappy, yes I will say something, it is offensive and I don't see my hair as unkempt. The problem is you are trying to convince me that I should use that word instead of being happy with you using that word for yourself. I don't want to be that militant natural that you appear to be. Your constant accusations that I am weak with low self esteem is really hilarious. I am a dark skinned natural with kinky hair and always fierce. But if badgering me, uplifts you, then I hope your self esteem rises, because you seem like you need this. Really

And my heart don't pump Kool-Aid troll. IRL Nappy is neutral and can be positive. I read everything you said and you contradict yourself and back track then play hypocrisy. The controversy is people like yourself can't grow up because your spirit is weak and your self-esteem is low. I read EVERYTHING you wrote and you refer black women (our) hair as kinky and the right usage. When I explain that kinky is negative to some black women because of it being applied negatively then you said that you refer to nappy hair as natural. I think you need to watch your tongue before you go around calling people hair kinky and thinking you're saying something positive. You will say it to the wrong person and you might not have any teeth so stop trolling. You know you are the natural militiant. I wouldn't be surprise you came from nappturality. You sound like one of those nappy-headed militant nazis.

 

[Celestial]

What are you talking about? It is OK if you didn't read my post in its entirety, I didn't half read yours, but you should do that if you are going to quote.

Stop trolling. All of your posts is there for people to read.

 

[Nonie]

I thought I was entering into the conversation to say I agree or disagree with the usage for me. It then became a conversation directed towards convincing me that I was wrong or uneducated about the word. The word ignorant can be neutral too, but I wouldn't go around telling a person who did not know about a particular topic, "You are ignorant". Nappy from its usage from people IRL is umkempt, matted, uncombed, etc, hair. It has been stated in some definitions that the N word was derived from words meaning black, but IRL it is negative(although some try to claim as positive). To me the origin or the original meaning is not relevant, it is its usage IRL that matters. To me real life usage is the definition that many follow. So while kinky may be negative to some or in other countries, etc., I don't find IRL for it to be negative for me, thus I choose to use it. As I stated before my daughter's hair IS kinky, but I have yet to find someone to reference it as 'nappy'. To claim they are synonymous in their usage, in my experience, is just not true.

@ the bold, and the reason for this is one that people need to understand in order to stop letting the word hurt them so.

Black is a word that is used rarely used to describe positive things unless we're talking about the state of a bank account.

One definition of black is "characterized by hostility or angry or discontent"; another definition is "very sad, gloomy, or calamitous"; and yet another "thoroughly sinister or evil"; and still another "dirty, soiled"; "connected with or invoking the supernatural and especially the devil". And there are people who will use the word and think those thoughts while to someone like me, black is a color and a race--my race. I know I don't look like the color black, but I accept my race as being the black race because I have never seen the word as a bad word. But I am open-minded enough to see the other side of it without letting that be the truth for me.

So far, I have pointed out words that don't hurt me. Let me bring up a word that caused an uproar when it was used in a public speech. Some politician a few years ago used the word "*****rdly" (I had to give a link to the word so folks who don't know it, see the correct spelling so as not to confuse it with the N word spelling--since bloody censoring won't let me write it out ) while addressing a group of people which included black people to describe a habit he had noticed. Now like a lot of people, I had never heard the word and thought it was a derivative of the N word and wondered why he'd be so crude as to use it insensitively so boldly. I don't doubt, like some have said, that knowing his audience he might've done it on purpose just to ruffle feathers since it isn't a common word (to me anyway, and obviously to a lot of those who were in his audience). Later it was determined that, as someone pointed out, the word meant miserly. I stood corrected and learned something that day. And while I will not use the word coz I see how it can be misunderstood, it no longer bothered me to hear it. Why? Because despite my previous understanding of it, I now knew what it really meant. I was able to make it lose its power over me--even if the user might've done it just to upset folks. (Not saying he did, but it was hard not to think he did it on purpose, since why would he use a rare word to communicate a message to lay people? I mean, you don't stand up and reel off a speech in Welsh when your audience is made up of people from Kakamega, Kenya, do you?)

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is regardless of our experiences, it does help to open our minds to see things differently, even if just for the sake of learning. I have understood why nappy bothers people but I wouldn't have had I just maintained that my understanding is all that matters. So now if someone uses it as an insult, I get what they are saying: that my hair looks unkempt. When someone says it with a smile, I don't immediately assume they're being cheeky and insulting me on the sly, but I am able to consider that they just might be describing the texture.

You know what's so funny (and maybe that's just me), when many of us went up in arms about "n i g g a rdly" and it came to be that the word was actually not a racist word, I actually felt embarrassed because I felt like the dude just succeeded in making the point that not only are blacks ready to fly of the handle at the slightest little thing, but we are also dumb and ignorant and need to learn English. I don't know why I felt that way, but I did. So I find that learning everything you can about words not only empowers us, but also makes us communicate better. I do hope that those who hate the word nappy do not turn a casual convo with some peace bearing person into an uncomfortable confrontation, coz not everyone means to be cruel.

 

[Celestial]

I know about that incident. He purposely used that word because he knows that blacks have a weak vocabulary and he did it to cause controversy. He is correct about that word and ironically, it is Sweden (or scandinavian) in origin just like the word kinky. It is not a coincident that many english words have scandinavian origins since scandinavian languages is also Germanic just like English.

 

[Nonie]

I know about that incident. He purposely used that word because he knows that blacks have a weak vocabulary and he did it to cause controversy. He is correct about that word and ironically, it is Sweden (or scandinavian) in origin just like the word kinky. It is not a coincident that many english words have scandinavian origins since scandinavian languages is also Germanic just like English.

And I would not be surprised if some people don't use the word nappy knowing the true meaning but just because they want to make the same point I feel that dude made. I love Andromeda's remark "You say that like it's a bad thing(?)" Maybe it's just wishful thinking, but I look forward to the day when we can leave folks who mean to hurt us with a look of because we turn around the words they toss at us to their positive meanings and go "And what!?" Or like that dude tried to do when he made a point that we are so narrow-minded/dimwitted, act like we didn't get their version of the word so the joke ends up being on them.

If someone came and said to me "You are just a woman!" they could mean weak, brainless, only-good-for-bearing-kids, etc...and I might know that's what they mean especially if I have previously heard their chauvinistic remarks. But I refuse to believe that's what I am. I KNOW I'm not that at all, so if I responded with, "Erm....hello? And? And the Pope is a Catholic...so what's new?" (coz clearly, I'm not a dude ) then I'd have turned their bullets into duds. I wish more people could learn to do that.

I told you how someone tried to insult me by pointing out my hairstyle was crazy-looking (and I knew it was) but I grinned broadly and said, "OMG, how did you guess that's the look I was going for?" And you know what happened, that wiped the grin off the joker and she tilted her head as if in admiration apparently a bit confused and I got the feeling that she was wondering if she isn't the one out of touch with what's IN.

So if someone looked at me with a smirk and said, "Your hair is so nappy" and I suspected they meant unkempt when I know darn well that my hair looks like FIYAH, why would I get mad unless I thought there was some truth to their insulting intent? Instead, if someone said that, because I know it isn't unkempt, I'd immediately translate that to the positive meanings I know and conclude they finally saw its true texture and bemused I'd say, "Yup! But it's so hard sometimes to see the coils coz they are so tiny! In fact, a lot of people aren't as observant as you and don't know it, so I have to give you kudos for that. The other thing I love about nappy hair is how versatile it is. Do you know I can change it from this to straight and back to this in a day?...." By the time I'd be done, they'd probably stop me to ask, "Er...what do you think I said?" Coz their insult would've been totally lost on me. At which point I'd say, "Oh, you just basically told me that my hair was made of tight coils." At which point they'd "correct" me. And then I'd say, "Really? That's what you THINK the word means?" I'm sorry. I usually translate words literally so ma bad. Personally, I like it and I usually do what I like, so...*shrug* "

 

[kmn1980]

I don't believe the bolded but I've heard white people call their hair knotty (same as nappy) when it gets tangled and I think they are correct. What is the unkempt part. Is it tangled hair? I don't believe any white person would call their hair 'nappy' if it is not tangled or matted.

You better believe it. I've grown up around white folx. Was a competitive swimmer with white folx. Went to school with white folx. Worked with white folx. Evaluated white folx. I have no reason to lie about what I've heard white folx say in reference to their hair when it's unkempt or in an undesirable condition at any given moment. I don't know. Go hang around more white people if you can stand it.

4th time (and hopefully last), you can call your hair whatever you want to call it; don't bring it to me.