What should I tell my SO to do?

[♥Lamaravilla♥]

My SO and I are very active in our church . He is a deacon, head of the men's department, and he teaches bible study most Wednesday nights. Recently our Bishop approached him and asked when he was going to do the trials to become elevated to be a Minister. So he ummmed and aahhhed for awhile and then just told him he would think about it.

I asked him why he is so hesitant to go farther in the church, and he straight up told me he is afraid of the additional responsibility. Last summer our Pastor passed, and we have yet to find a replacement for him. Since then the leadership role has fallen heavily on my SO and his best friend from childhood. I honestly believe it is God's will for my SO to eventually be the Pastor in this church. Convocations is coming up this August, and I would love to see him elevated, his best friend has already agreed to do it, but I don't want him to feel like he has been pressured or forced to do this if he feels he isn't prepared to handle this role within the church.

I have told him to pray about it, I have even sat and prayed with him about this particular situation, but he is yet to make a decision. I don't know if I should be encouraging him or what. Any suggestions ladies erplexed

 

[Prudent1]

Tlinton84,

Since the two of you have prayed has SO received an answer from God? It is such a huge responsibility to be a minister and something you definitely need to be called into by God himself with no doubts as to whether that is what He wants SO to do. You asked for suggestions. I would pray for him asking God to let His will be done in your SO's life specifically asking God to give SO wisdom and direction in this very important matter and asking that God's perfect love would cast out the fear in your SO's life(1 John 4:18). If his calling is in ministry our adversary could simply be trying to distract him. If he is being called into ministry are you prepared for what that could mean for you too? The SO of a minister is a serious thing and requires a lot of personal sacrifice and balance(1 Peter 5:8). If I were in your situation I would pray to God to clearly hear his voice (John 10:27) and ask Him to bind our minds to his will. Here are 2 short prayers you can both pray separately or together.

Prayer for Clarity
Heavenly Father, I (we) ask you to give me (us) and each person I (we) have pryed for today clarity of vision, clarity of sight, clarity of thought, clarity of mind, clarity of knowing, and hearing Your Voice according to John 16:23. Amen!

Your Divine Purpose
Dear Lord, help me(us), oh Gracious Father to not be caught up in religion, but to be caught up in spirit; Your Holy Spirit that I(we) might be more effectual in my(our) prayers and be obedient to You. I(we) want to serve your Divine purpose. Lord; and do what is good and right in Your sight. Allow me(us), Dear Lord, to live in Your Light and the Love that You have for me(us). Show me(us) how to be helpful to Your Kingdo.. Show me(us) how to live a life of constant praise to You. Bless Jesus Christ's Holy Name. Amen!

HTH,
Prudent1

 

[Shimmie]

My SO and I are very active in our church . He is a deacon, head of the men's department, and he teaches bible study most Wednesday nights. Recently our Bishop approached him and asked when he was going to do the trials to become elevated to be a Minister. So he ummmed and aahhhed for awhile and then just told him he would think about it.

I asked him why he is so hesitant to go farther in the church, and he straight up told me he is afraid of the additional responsibility. Last summer our Pastor passed, and we have yet to find a replacement for him. Since then the leadership role has fallen heavily on my SO and his best friend from childhood. I honestly believe it is God's will for my SO to eventually be the Pastor in this church. Convocations is coming up this August, and I would love to see him elevated, his best friend has already agreed to do it, but I don't want him to feel like he has been pressured or forced to do this if he feels he isn't prepared to handle this role within the church.

I have told him to pray about it, I have even sat and prayed with him about this particular situation, but he is yet to make a decision. I don't know if I should be encouraging him or what. Any suggestions ladies erplexed

It's a hard call, especially to see someone you care for to be in this 'Valley of Decision'.

The only thing you can do is to 'BE Still', Say nothing, Pressure nothing, not even in your thoughts, and completely pray for him and with him. But say nothing.

God will speak to him as He spoke to Samuel and all of the other prophets and men who are called of God to minister.

Say nothing... just pray. Fast a little as well and just pray 'For' Him and God's perfect will for him.

Gods bless him and you....

 

[♥Lamaravilla♥]

Thank you Prudent1. I have considered the amount of time this will require of him and the sacrifices that we will both have to make in our relationship and our lives and I am honestly fine with that. It's not my place to hold anyone back in any aspect of their lives least of all spiritually.

I feel God has answered our prayers, I believe he is meant to do this. I believe he has received his answer as well he just isn't telling me, or maybe he is denying it. I just don't see how he can not take this role, especially if it's God's will. This boy has done so much for this church. People respect him and listen to him and does what he says. He has increased the membership and the attendance, he has managed to make a plan that got the church out of debt, I mean how many churchs do you know of that have their mortgage paid off? I just don't understand why someone so capable and I truly believe touched by God would be so reluctant to do it.

I appreciate the scriptures and the prayers. Tonight when I talk to him I will see how he feels and rely what you have said (of course while implying that I came up with it, he might just get angry at me for talking about him like this on a forum lol)

Thank you again for your advice

 

[♥Lamaravilla♥]

Thank you Shimmie. That is going to be hard for me to do as I am known for voicing my opinions on what I feel he should do erplexed But he also asks me what I think he should do , but this particular time I told him he needs to make this decision himself and do what feels best for him. I told him I have confidence in his abilities to do this and that he would do very well but it's still his choice.

I just wish I could figure out what exactly it is that is holding him back I just hate to see him struggle with anything, particularly a spiritual struggle, it hurts my heart

I will keep praying with him and for him, and it's funny that you should suggest fasting because I had already decided to do that this week from sun up to sun down, maybe I can get him to join me in that as well.

God bless you as well my dear, and have a lovely night

 

[Prudent1]

Your SO is so blessed to have you in his life. It is obvious how much you care for him.:heart2: I pray that you will have many happy years ahead of you. Let us know how God moves in this situation.

Prudent1

 

[Shimmie]

Thank you Shimmie. That is going to be hard for me to do as I am known for voicing my opinions on what I feel he should do erplexed But he also asks me what I think he should do , but this particular time I told him he needs to make this decision himself and do what feels best for him. I told him I have confidence in his abilities to do this and that he would do very well but it's still his choice.

I just wish I could figure out what exactly it is that is holding him back I just hate to see him struggle with anything, particularly a spiritual struggle, it hurts my heart

I will keep praying with him and for him, and it's funny that you should suggest fasting because I had already decided to do that this week from sun up to sun down, maybe I can get him to join me in that as well.

God bless you as well my dear, and have a lovely night

Angel, meditate on Proverbs 31. Allow God to prepare you. Be still and know that God is God (Psalm 46).

Pastoring is a huge responsibility, HUGE. So is being a Pastor's wife. Be still and allow God to minister and prepare you for your 'role' and responsibility with this man of God in your life. Be still, for you shall not be moved, for God is in the midst of you. Be still and know that He is God. The Lord God above all.

You see, being the vessel alongside a Man of God requires even more of you than of the Pastor, himself. God is 'after' you, just as much as him. Be still, Be still, Be quiet and allow God to be God. Be still and know.

 

[Evolving78]

I totally agree with Shimmie. you are going to have to be still and quiet on this one.

 

[♥Lamaravilla♥]

So I didn't question him last night, I just prayed with him like we do every night and I also read some passages with him including the ones that were suggested by Prudent1 then he went home.

So he called me this morning like around 5:30 and I'm a little salty because I was still asleep but I can't stay mad at him. He asked me if I realize what would be required of him to be elevated to Minister. I told him I realize all the work and time that is involved which will take away from our time. But I also told him that two people who are strong in their relationship with The Lord and come together with that between them can only be stronger in their union with each other.

So again he asks me what he should do
I told him whatever The Lord puts in your heart, and I left it at that. I could tell he was surprised because he would have normally gotten a whole long lecture from me and all that.

I really think he is opening his heart up to this. And whatever adversity is preventing him from realizing God's Will is going to release him.

If you can't tell I love this man so much and I can't wait to be his wife. I will definitely keep you all updated on his journey.

Thank you for all your advice and your prayers

 

[Shimmie]

So I didn't question him last night, I just prayed with him like we do every night and I also read some passages with him including the ones that were suggested by Prudent1 then he went home.

So he called me this morning like around 5:30 and I'm a little salty because I was still asleep but I can't stay mad at him. He asked me if I realize what would be required of him to be elevated to Minister. I told him I realize all the work and time that is involved which will take away from our time. But I also told him that two people who are strong in their relationship with The Lord and come together with that between them can only be stronger in their union with each other.

So again he asks me what he should do
I told him whatever The Lord puts in your heart, and I left it at that. I could tell he was surprised because he would have normally gotten a whole long lecture from me and all that.

I really think he is opening his heart up to this. And whatever adversity is preventing him from realizing God's Will is going to release him.

If you can't tell I love this man so much and I can't wait to be his wife. I will definitely keep you all updated on his journey.

Thank you for all your advice and your prayers

He has to ear God for himself.......BUT, as a woman (the woman in his life), you can't tell him that. . Major No, No, and NO.

Your 'silence' and listening ear, speaks more volumes than the library of congress. It says to him,

"She trusts me to handle this."

"She believes in me"

"She's allowing me to be 'the Man'.

All the while, you are interceding on his behalf, getting the enemy of distractions and doubt away. Your prayers open the channels of his heart to hear God's voice as did Adam when He and God walked together in the 'cool of the day' (early in the morning).

You are also preparing yourself to be 'his ear', when no one else can or will be. He'll know that he can come to you and hear from God on his own. One of the biggest and most intimate connections we have with a man is to intercede for him in prayer.

 

[GV-NA-GI-TLV-GE-I]

My SO and I are very active in our church . He is a deacon, head of the men's department, and he teaches bible study most Wednesday nights. Recently our Bishop approached him and asked when he was going to do the trials to become elevated to be a Minister. So he ummmed and aahhhed for awhile and then just told him he would think about it.

I asked him why he is so hesitant to go farther in the church, and he straight up told me he is afraid of the additional responsibility. Last summer our Pastor passed, and we have yet to find a replacement for him. Since then the leadership role has fallen heavily on my SO and his best friend from childhood. I honestly believe it is God's will for my SO to eventually be the Pastor in this church. Convocations is coming up this August, and I would love to see him elevated, his best friend has already agreed to do it, but I don't want him to feel like he has been pressured or forced to do this if he feels he isn't prepared to handle this role within the church.

I have told him to pray about it, I have even sat and prayed with him about this particular situation, but he is yet to make a decision. I don't know if I should be encouraging him or what. Any suggestions ladies erplexed

He needs to pray about it alone, just HIm and G-d. Only G-d can call him.