Total Package
- Thread starter DayStar
- Start date
Dposh167
Well-Known Member
...yeslol...i used to think this way (and still do)...but i have to also look at myself. I'm not perfect...and i wouldn't want someone to shy away from me b/c of some lil silly trait, or fault of mine.
But when u say total package....exactly what are u talking about? What are u looking for?
Spongie Bloom
New Member
i dnt think u can ever find a 100% so u have to sacrifise 20% im by no means saying anyone should settle, its just that no one is a 100%, everyone has a different view of what a total package is but i think everyone has must haves then are non negotiable (that dont matter in the grand scheme of things) and other things that are
DayStar
Well-Known Member
lol...i used to think this way (and still do)...but i have to also look at myself. I'm not perfect...and i wouldn't want someone to shy away from me b/c of some lil silly trait, or fault of mine.
But when u say total package....exactly what are u talking about? What are u looking for?
well obviously my type, a provider ( a man who takes of all the household expenses regardless of my income)...a man who allows me to preserve my "lady ness", educated, no wandering eye, not selfish in the bedroom, isnt broke, marriage minded...
i can go on forever....
DayStar
Well-Known Member
sometimes this is how i feel.
Spongie Bloom
New Member
girl all these successful relationships u see are not working cause pple found their total package, relationships need hard work to exist my parents have been married 36 yrs now and my mum told me this, she said u will never find a man who is totally wat u r looking for, he may not look the way u think he will, he may not have the career u think he will have (but if hes a broke ass run for the hills
), he may not even sound like him but when u r with him it will just fall into place n u wil know ...that does not mean it will just fall in ur lap all worked out it will take time, patience and a lot of effort put inthats part of the reason y i dont believe in soulmates cause i believe relationships are about two pple finding each other and working at it not two pple who were 'born' to be with together other come wind or rain
Duchesse
Well-Known Member
I agree with you on this! We are all flawed, and I know I wouldn't want someone to double think me because I have small boobs, and have no desire to watch sports. You should/must have the things that consititute the best parts of the package, but use your common sense to judge on the nonessentials.
Divine Inspiration
Well-Known Member
I think it's possible to get the total package within reason, but I also think some women place too much emphasis on a checklist instead of giving a man room to be who he is. There is no such thing as a perfect person so I think there has to be a balance. I also think women should be careful about having expectations of men that they can not or will not meet themsevles.
I also think wanting a "total package" requires that a woman do a LOT of introspection and soul searching herself to discover what she really NEEDS in a healthy relationship and what she WANTS. The two can be the difference between a deal breaker and happily ever after.
I say pursue the total package, but stay flexible. The perfect man for you may not be who you think he is. Life is full of ironic surprises.
I also think wanting a "total package" requires that a woman do a LOT of introspection and soul searching herself to discover what she really NEEDS in a healthy relationship and what she WANTS. The two can be the difference between a deal breaker and happily ever after.
I say pursue the total package, but stay flexible. The perfect man for you may not be who you think he is. Life is full of ironic surprises.
I think it's possible to get the total package within reason, but I also think some women place too much emphasis on a checklist instead of giving a man room to be who he is. There is no such thing as a perfect person so I think there has to be a balance. I also think women should be careful about having expectations of men that they can not or will not meet themsevles.
I also think wanting a "total package" requires that a woman do a LOT of introspection and soul searching herself to discover what she really NEEDS in a healthy relationship and what she WANTS. The two can be the difference between a deal breaker and happily ever after.
I say pursue the total package, but stay flexible. The perfect man for you may not be who you think he is. Life is full of ironic surprises.
Wonderful post. I agree. The only way you can really know what you want and have expectations of someone else is through real close introspection of yourself w/ the ability to make corrections.
I totally agree with the last line. Stay flexible. Thats why I believe have lots of friends...YOU NEVER KNOW.
DayStar
Well-Known Member
i agree.....should women take physical appearance out of the equation.....i NEED...to be attracted to a man.....i dont think i could ever truly look over that characteristic.
I think it's possible to get the total package within reason, but I also think some women place too much emphasis on a checklist instead of giving a man room to be who he is. There is no such thing as a perfect person so I think there has to be a balance. I also think women should be careful about having expectations of men that they can not or will not meet themsevles.
I also think wanting a "total package" requires that a woman do a LOT of introspection and soul searching herself to discover what she really NEEDS in a healthy relationship and what she WANTS. The two can be the difference between a deal breaker and happily ever after.
I say pursue the total package, but stay flexible. The perfect man for you may not be who you think he is. Life is full of ironic surprises.
Divine Inspiration
Well-Known Member
Absolutely not. Physical attraction matters! In the beginning, that's all you have. But I would not be hung up on every detail of how he looks (eye color, ear size, etc). Being attracted to a man, IMO, is necessary, but knitpicking over a man's appearance is not. I don't want him all up in my pores so I stay outta his.
DayStar
Well-Known Member
Absolutely not. Physical attraction matters! In the beginning, that's all you have. But I would not be hung up on every detail of how he looks (eye color, ear size, etc). Being attracted to a man, IMO, is necessary, but knitpicking over a man's appearance is not. I don't want him all up in my pores so I stay outta his.
right...i dig that...and ITA!
i agree.....should women take physical appearance out of the equation.....i NEED...to be attracted to a man.....i dont think i could ever truly look over that characteristic.[/QUOTE]
Yeah but sometimes...Kindness, Integrity, Honor, Character are more attractive than any six-pack, nice body, etc.
Sometimes what you thought was attractive is not attractive anymore, ask any 20ish woman vs 35ish woman.
DayStar
Well-Known Member
Yeah but sometimes...Kindness, Integrity, Honor, Character are more attractive than any six-pack, nice body, etc.
Sometimes what you thought was attractive is not attractive anymore, ask any 20ish woman vs 35ish woman.
i agree...attraction to me is beyond physical.....hell i think lil wayne is fine and others think he is
.........
treybaby2005
Well-Known Member
Umm when you find that man,please please find out if he has a brother!well obviously my type, a provider ( a man who takes of all the household expenses regardless of my income)...a man who allows me to preserve my "lady ness", educated, no wandering eye, not selfish in the bedroom, isnt broke, marriage minded...
i can go on forever....
Opalsunset
New Member
About 2 or 3 years ago me and my friend made a list of the things that we imagined our absolute perfect man possessing. For me, I had about 30 things listed. 2 years later (Last year) I met this guy that had everything (except about three things, all being physical things) I care about him very much and I can tell her does too.. In my eyes hes the total package..Though there are many things that I do worry about with him. For one his health isn't well and my family and his family is always worried about him. He also lives far from me which makes things that much more difficult, and finally.his mother scares me.
So it's rough at times but I do believe the total package is out there with some things we may need to sacrafice for that 'just right' guy.
So it's rough at times but I do believe the total package is out there with some things we may need to sacrafice for that 'just right' guy.
Good luck with that.well obviously my type, a provider ( a man who takes of all the household expenses regardless of my income)...a man who allows me to preserve my "lady ness", educated, no wandering eye, not selfish in the bedroom, isnt broke, marriage minded...
i can go on forever....