nychaelasymone
Well-Known Member
wedding, were you mom's (if applicable) involved? (planning ideas, help you pick out a dress) etc.
Are they paying for the wedding? If so, then yes, their opinions should hold some serious weight.
If they aren't - this is the first step in you establishing yourself as their adult daughter, and not merely their child. Put those boundaries up, girl, and do what you want in a way that presents the least stress to you.
They offered to pay for the hall (I'm probably going to pay for it) but I don't think I should be forced to take all their advice simply because they offered to pay for it. I'm/we're paying for this shin-dig.
I think it comes down to courtesy, really. Their money is good enough for you, but their advice isn't? erplexed Not saying this is what you are saying/doing, at all, but I've seen that attitude before - and it's kinda, ugly, in my mind.
And there is such a fine line between 'some' of their advice and 'all' of their advice - esp. when it comes to an event as emotional as a wedding.
Personally, I'd suggest paying for it all, as that creates a clear boundary, and if they would like to gift you with something (my mom gifted us with our cake, for example) - that's okay, and perhaps they should have a healthy bit of say in the gift.
No, they were not involved. I was 33yrs old and he was 41 yrs old. It was the first for both of us. I assumed everyone was cool with me planning. Until the very end, I found out that my soon to be mother in law was pissed because I did not include her in the planning. She said I was marrying her oldest son I should have given her the respecterplexed. I didn't realize how important it was for her.