Throwing A Bridal Shower Properly

[tuffCOOKiE]

Hi Everyone!!

My sister is getting married in July and I need some ideas for a bridal shower. The bridal shower is going to be on Long Island, NY and it needs to be low budget. I'm the MOH, unemployed and the bmaids are, for the most part, college students (won't be able to pitch in a lot). So I have some q's for you:

Does anyone have any book recommendations? Ideas of their own? Ways to save $$$$? Is it OK to have the guests pay for their plate at the bridal shower?

TIA!!

 

[MrsWatson]

Hey tuffCOOKIE,

I'm no expert. But from my past experiences with bridal showers, I wouldn't have the guests pay for their own plates. If money is an issue, I would consider having it at someones house, and cooking the food yourselves (bridal party). My friend got married in January and for her BS we bought decorations online (i'll look for the website). That saved us a lot of money. We also had her BS and bachelorette party on the same day, so we didn't have to get twice the balloons, etc. I know that technically the MOH is supposed to take care of the BS, but my mom and DH's mom helped A LOT with mine because my MOH was in college at the time as well. Don't be afraid to ask others who are close to your sister to help out.

 

[Makenzie]

I've never paid for my plate at a bridal shower and honestly, I would never pay for my plate at a shower. Why not have it at someone's home? Have a bbq, or a group of you cook the food yourself. It doesn't have to be catered.

 

[ThickHair]

If you can't afford to pay for everyone's meal, I agree you should have it at someone's house and offer finger foods.

How many people are you planning to invite?

 

[tuffCOOKiE]

About 35 people are invited but I would be expecting around 25. The reason why I can't have it at my house is because we're in the process of renovation but, I agree.. I might have to ask one of my cousins(bmaid) to have it at their home.. Is that intrusive to ask one of the bmaids to lend their house??

Also MrsWatson, if you could find the website, that would be GREAT!

To clarify, my sister and I are the MOH. I'm unemployed and she works PT at a retail store. Such is the case for most of the bmaids.. but I'll look into having it at a house and see.

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

My bridal shower was low budget but fabulous! I had about 25 guests and it was a potluck! Some people frowned on the idea and I heard that I got talked about by some people but it ended up being quite amazing.

People brought their best dishes and there was so much amazing food left over that it was insane. People took plates (plural) home. We had it at my house. We did google searches for random bridal shower games and we had so much fun. My bridesmaids organized it. It was a great day.

When I have a baby and have a baby shower, I'm seriously thinking about that being potluck too. The food was better than if it had been catered IMO b/c there was so much variety.

 

[Makenzie]

About 35 people are invited but I would be expecting around 25. The reason why I can't have it at my house is because we're in the process of renovation but, I agree.. I might have to ask one of my cousins(bmaid) to have it at their home.. Is that intrusive to ask one of the bmaids to lend their house??

Also @MrsWatson, if you could find the website, that would be GREAT!

To clarify, my sister and I are the MOH. I'm unemployed and she works PT at a retail store. Such is the case for most of the bmaids.. but I'll look into having it at a house and see.

Even though you and your sis are the MOH's, there is nothing wrong with having the bridesmaids help out. It really should be a group effort. If one has a house that you can have the shower at, problem solved.

 

[ThickHair]

About 35 people are invited but I would be expecting around 25. The reason why I can't have it at my house is because we're in the process of renovation but, I agree.. I might have to ask one of my cousins(bmaid) to have it at their home.. Is that intrusive to ask one of the bmaids to lend their house??

One thing for sure, if you are inviting 35 people then plan for 35 people, not 25. No, it is not intrusive to ask one of the bridesmaids to lend their house. Why are they not helping with the shower? Just asking.

Sounds like you might be overextending yourself. What is the bride expecting? If she is expecting a lot you may want to tell her right off the bat, that it is going to be a low budget affair. You can only work with what you have and I hate for the bride to get her feelings hurt.

 

[bklynbornNbred]

Please do not ask your guests to pay for their plates. The first thing is for you and your sis to do is set a budget. That will help determine what kind of event you can plan. If the list is made up of a lot of family can you mom/aunt help with the costs? Otherwise you may need to cut back since 35 is a lot of people for hosts with low funds.

Showers don't have to be full meal events. You can set it up for tea time and offer a variety of teas with sandwiches and desserts.

 

[NaturalEnigma]

I have to throw a bridal shower for my sister too. Her wedding is also in July. I don't even know how to begin. Only 1 out of her 5 bridesmaids has a job.erplexed. I was going to look online for bridal shower ideas. My sister told me I needed to send invitations to invite people to come. I was like "INVITATIONS!!?! Who has money for invitations? I was going to just call people up and ask them to come." Invitations are too darn expensive, I know because my sister spent an arm and a leg for her wedding invitations. So I have to figure to how to make them. It shouldn't be too hard. We're having her bridal shower at a restaurant, but we haven't figured out the details yet. So yeah, you might want to think about making or buying invitations to send out.

 

[ThickHair]

[

I have to throw a bridal shower for my sister too. Her wedding is also in July. I don't even know how to begin. Only 1 out of her 5 bridesmaids has a job.erplexed. I was going to look online for bridal shower ideas. My sister told me I needed to send invitations to invite people to come. I was like "INVITATIONS!!?! Who has money for invitations? I was going to just call people up and ask them to come." Invitations are too darn expensive, I know because my sister spent an arm and a leg for her wedding invitations. So I have to figure to how to make them. It shouldn't be too hard. We're having her bridal shower at a restaurant, but we haven't figured out the details yet. So yeah, you might want to think about making or buying invitations to send out.

You are worried about invitations costing and arm and a leg and you are having a shower at a restaurant??? Where are you going to eat that you are not going to have to come off some money?

 

[GraceV]

I think you can still have a nice event without spending too much.
*Decorations like balloons can be bought at the dollar store.
*Get the drinks in 'bulk' from a place like Costco or Sam's. You could get the big bottles instead of individual bottles.
*Disposable plates and cups rather than china.
*No alcohol.
*Finger foods and/or have someone cook. You could also have the bride's maids each bring a dish to help out. You could buy frozen foods at walmart e.g. wings and cook them. It'll be cheaper than ordering from a restaurant or having it catered.
*Search online for games that don't require too much stuff to buy.
*For a venue, see if your place of worship (if you have one) has a place they can let y'all use. One shower I went to used a small room owned by the church, at another shower they used the 'clubhouse' owned by the apartment complex one of the organizers lived at. It was free for residents, they just had to reserve it. See of someone's apartment has a movie room or entertainment room.

PLEASE don't make the guests pay for their food, they are already paying for the gifts they want to shower the bride with.

 

[ThickHair]

I think you can still have a nice event without spending too much.
*No alcohol.

That right there can save a whole lot of money. Everyone who I have heard discuss their big wedding, without me even asking said that the alcohol was almost as much as the food. I am always like GTFOOH.

Contrary to popular belief, a couple is still married if they don't serve alcohol at the reception and it is NOT TACKY to not serve it. Just make people aware is all.

 

[Avyn]

My bridal shower was low budget but fabulous! I had about 25 guests and it was a potluck! Some people frowned on the idea and I heard that I got talked about by some people but it ended up being quite amazing.

People brought their best dishes and there was so much amazing food left over that it was insane. People took plates (plural) home. We had it at my house. We did google searches for random bridal shower games and we had so much fun. My bridesmaids organized it. It was a great day.

When I have a baby and have a baby shower, I'm seriously thinking about that being potluck too. The food was better than if it had been catered IMO b/c there was so much variety.

I went to a shower similar to this, but the guests were given recipe cards with the invitation and asked to share a recipe to build the brides repertoire and at the shower the favors were these REALY nice set of measuring spoons that had love phrases inscribed on them.

 

[chocolat79]

You could use this blog for ideas. It's spectacular and she tells where she got a lot of things. A lot of the things are purchased from Etsy. HTH

Hostess With the Mostess

 

[tuffCOOKiE]

Thank you ladies for your replies.

I had a talk with the bmaids and told them that basically that I can't care where they have to get this money from because they agreed to be in the wedding. The amount i'm asking for is not unreasonable for a restaurant in NY and further, no one said their home was available for the party.

My sister (the bride) has changed her mind and would like the shower to be "Jack and Jill".. has anyone heard of this?? It basically means that the bshower is now co-ed. Oh, Brotherrrr

 

[ThickHair]

Thank you ladies for your replies.

I had a talk with the bmaids and told them that basically that I can't care where they have to get this money from because they agreed to be in the wedding. The amount i'm asking for is not unreasonable for a restaurant in NY and further, no one said their home was available for the party.

My sister (the bride) has changed her mind and would like the shower to be "Jack and Jill".. has anyone heard of this?? It basically means that the bshower is now co-ed. Oh, Brotherrrr

When is all of this scheduled to go down? If it is months away then everyone should have had some money set aside anyway. What did the other bridesmaids say when you gave them the figure?????? If you are going to have a large party, most restaurants will let you select a limited menu to offer to your group, so you don't have one person ordering the $$$ entree and another ordering the $ entree. You put together a menu where all of the selections are $$. Usually a restaurant will do this for a banquet and you would have to put down a deposit. If everything is less then your deposit, you obviously receive the difference back. Don't forget to include the tip.

Yes, I have heard of Jack n Jill showers, but I prefer just the women. Let the men have their own thing, IMHO.