Thinking of going natural...

HairQueen

HairQueen

Active Member
I am having a debate in my head over what to do with my hair!

I am relaxed and fed up with having thin ends that constantly break. Since stretching my relaxers, my hair has thickened up considerably and it is soooo much healthier than it was but is still a long way from perfect.

I really do feel that 3/4 of my hair is unable to take the harshness of a relaxer.

I noticed that since I have been lhcf and now do regular weekly deep conditioning my hair feels very soft in the back with quite a defined curl pattern, something I didnt notice before. The hair in the front/sides however is totally different! It is quite coarse in the front and sides, so when I try to stretch I do look a bit of a mess.

Basically it seems to me that I am damaging my hair all because 1/4 of it benefits from a relaxer, I am in a dilema and not sure how difficult it would be to manage natural.

Is anybody else's hair like this? Are you relaxed or natural?

p.s.I have no idea what my hair would be like natural, I have not seen it for about 20 years !
 
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You still sound uncertain, and having doubts is the last thing on your mind when you are ready to BC. You should give yourself a few more months or inches of Protective styling then decided what to do.
 
Oh no I can't do the BC! I love my long hair too much, if I go natural I would have to cut the relaxer out slowly - no BCing for me!

Also, if I go natural I will plan on straightening once a week/ two weeks.

Thanks
 
You are having the same exact issues i had, end would break off till eternity..it truly was never ending. I just went natural just to flip the script to see what would happen with the over health of my hair. My hair seems much healthier straightening by heat verse relaxer. However everyone hair is different I can't say my experience is typical. Only thing I can suggest is exploring all your options even all the options of staying relaxed.
 
20Something said:
You are having the same exact issues i had, end would break off till eternity..it truly was never ending. I just went natural just to flip the script to see what would happen with the over health of my hair. My hair seems much healthier straightening by heat verse relaxer. However everyone hair is different I can't say my experience is typical. Only thing I can suggest is exploring all your options even all the options of staying relaxed.
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Hi

How often do you straighten your natural hair? What hair type do you think you are?

I thought I was 4b all over but now I think I am 4a in the back and 4b in the front(I think!)

Thanks.
 
Evaluate your hair regimen and see if you can pinpoint whether you're doing anything that is causing your ends to break. Relaxed or natural, it's important to ensure that you baby your ends or seeing any progress will be extremely difficult, if not impossible. As far as going natural, I didn't find it "easy" because I had a long transition. However, once you are mentally prepared for the challenge is when you should take the plunge. HTH
 
Do a 6 month stretch. That's how I started and ended up never relaxing. Going natural doesn't equal BC and you don't need to decide right now if you want to go natural.
 
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Austro-Afrikana said:
Do a 6 month stretch. That's how I started and ended up never relaxing. Going natural doesn't equal BC and you don't need to decide right now if you want to go natural.
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I mostly agree with this advice. I was only relaxing my hair 2-3 times a year anyway so it was easy to stop entirely. My transition was easy because I rocked extension braids on and off for the most part.

My only concern is that managing the two textures can be discouraging for a lot of people. I feel like people stretch 6 months and then go "Wow, if my natural hair is this hard to manage, never mind!" It is important to realize your natural hair will be MUCH easier to manage than your two-texture transitioning hair, so just keep that in mind when the going gets tough.
 
Going natural is very much mental as it is physical. You have time to decide. I am transitioning right now, and I am enjoying the journey. Going natural is not for everyone. Going natural to me is not using heat at all. Heat usage is a treat, like once or twice a year without changing the curl pattern. You are planning to use heat weekly which in my opinion is not good. Water is your friend, not heat. Our hair loves, loves, loves, water.

Sorry if I sound cut throat....
 
ladybettle said:
Going natural is very much mental as it is physical. You have time to decide. I am transitioning right now, and I am enjoying the journey. Going natural is not for everyone. Going natural to me is not using heat at all. Heat usage is a treat, like once or twice a year without changing the curl pattern. You are planning to use heat weekly which in my opinion is not good. Water is your friend, not heat. Our hair loves, loves, loves, water.

Sorry if I sound cut throat....
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Eh. To each head their own. I think for some of us going natural is both mental and physical--it certainly was for me. But I don't presume to know how it will be for the OP, giving that she is a different person and I've never met her before. And each head reacts differently to heat as well so whatever works for her.
 
prettypithy said:
Eh. To each head their own. I think for some of us going natural is both mental and physical--it certainly was for me. But I don't presume to know how it will be for the OP, giving that she is a different person and I've never met her before. And each head reacts differently to heat as well so whatever works for her.
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You are right...I guess I got a little excited.
 
Texlaxing was a good in between step for me before I decided going natural was next. It allowed me to become familiar with some texture w/o going straight to coily hair. As others have stated, give your self time to continue to experiment. You'll find out what steps you need to take next soon.
 
Thanks guys for your support its good to get the feedback I know it sounds silly but I feel slightly scared! Silly right? Scared of my own hair but its just because I like I said I have not seen it in 20 years I have no idea what it will be like.
 
Thanks for the feedback, the longest I have stretched is 4 months I think then I find myself running as fast as I can to my hairdresser as I look such a mess! Its when I hit that point that I will find it hardest I think but then again I was continuing to try and airdry with no blowdrying/flat ironing so no wonder it was so hard.

Also I dont want to wear a wig/weave/plaits/twists, is it possible to transition without having to involve some kind of fake hair? What about if I were to blowdry and flat iron every two weeks to blend the two textures?
 
I'd say now is the time to do it since it's almost summer. I've never relaxed but cut off 6-8 inches last night cause I was tired of split ends and crap looking hair. You won't regret it. Washing the hair will be so quick, brushing fast and it'll be much easier to style. Just cut it evenly! I cut off 2 inches more than I wanted because I cut one side shorter.
 
LatterGlory said:
Yep try stretching your relaxer for longer periods in between your relaxers. Gives you chance to see if going natural is what's right for you if not you can always relax without loosing your length OR you can start to texlax and see how you like that.
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Is telaxing the same as texturising? I am now thinking this may be a better option for me. I think I would enjoy being able to wear my hair straight without it reverting too quickly and also being able to wear a cute little curly pony tail.
 
HairQueen said:
Thanks for the feedback, the longest I have stretched is 4 months I think then I find myself running as fast as I can to my hairdresser as I look such a mess! Its when I hit that point that I will find it hardest I think but then again I was continuing to try and airdry with no blowdrying/flat ironing so no wonder it was so hard.

Also I dont want to wear a wig/weave/plaits/twists, is it possible to transition without having to involve some kind of fake hair? What about if I were to blowdry and flat iron every two weeks to blend the two textures?
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You could wear buns and braid outs and yes, you could straighten your hair. For the first 6 months I blow dried and straightened every week! For the next 6 months I cut out the flat iron and just blowdried. You don't need to rush into things and at the start it is definitely easier to work around your relaxed hair than your new growth. I only had 5 inches of relaxed hair so it wasn't long before I had more natural than relaxed; which is when I started working more around my natural hair.
 
Austro-Afrikana said:
You could wear buns and braid outs and yes, you could straighten your hair. For the first 6 months I blow dried and straightened every week! For the next 6 months I cut out the flat iron and just blowdried. You don't need to rush into things and at the start it is definitely easier to work around your relaxed hair than your new growth. I only had 5 inches of relaxed hair so it wasn't long before I had more natural than relaxed; which is when I started working more around my natural hair.
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Phew! I am so glad I can do that then, I want to still be able to look good on a day to day basis and when I out! :kiss3: I don't think I look as good in braids etc doesn't suit me so much.

Great information thanks I am really grateful as I have not got a clue about this! :look:
 
HairQueen said:
Thanks for the feedback, the longest I have stretched is 4 months I think then I find myself running as fast as I can to my hairdresser as I look such a mess! Its when I hit that point that I will find it hardest I think but then again I was continuing to try and airdry with no blowdrying/flat ironing so no wonder it was so hard.

Also I dont want to wear a wig/weave/plaits/twists, is it possible to transition without having to involve some kind of fake hair? What about if I were to blowdry and flat iron every two weeks to blend the two textures?
Click to expand...

I'm transitioning now. My last relaxer was in the beginning of February. Have you thought about twistouts/braidouts/bantu knot outs? These are the styles that I'm using to help me along my journey.

I wouldn't blowdry and flat iron every two weeks, but your hair may like that. A friend of mine transitioned using heat and flat ironing (every two weeks in the salon) and while she has a little bit of length now, it looks thin (almost as thin as when she was relaxed).
 
cam2717 said:
I'm transitioning now. My last relaxer was in the beginning of February. Have you thought about twistouts/braidouts/bantu knot outs? These are the styles that I'm using to help me along my journey.

I wouldn't blowdry and flat iron every two weeks, but your hair may like that. A friend of mine transitioned using heat and flat ironing (every two weeks in the salon) and while she has a little bit of length now, it looks thin (almost as thin as when she was relaxed).
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Oh no!! That news has blown my plan :sad:

Hmmn maybe the twist outs maybe an idea have no idea how that would look on me though but it sounds nice.
 
HairQueen said:
Hi

How often do you straighten your natural hair? What hair type do you think you are?

I thought I was 4b all over but now I think I am 4a in the back and 4b in the front(I think!)

Thanks.
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Mostly 4b, Once a week but going to experiment with once ever 2 weeks. I know I can wear it straight for 2 weeks, or just one week off one week on but I just haven't tired it yet.

I think stretching for 6 months to get a better idea of what you want to do is a good idea also. Just remember you have the freedom to do what ever you want, dont feel guilty.
 
I would probably stay relaxed if I had no intention of wearing natural hairstyles.
No point in trying to battle your hair back straight.
 
Maybe you should check out the heat training thread (for naturals who wear their hair straight most of the time).
 
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