The woman I want to be compared to who I am

[LifeafterLHCF]

Hello the lovely ladies of CF.Well Im a yr older and feel like a new soul.

I was thinking as Im trying to unwind about the woman I am and the woman I hope to eventually become.

Right now Im weak,low in self worth and esteem,overweight,unhealthy to a degree,angry,hurt,mad,sad,generally a kill joy most time.

I want to be a woman who is strong in her abiliities and strong in her dependence in God.I want to be self confidene real,happy,a little less plump(I feel me being bigger will take a real man of confidence to step up to the plate),joyful,inspiring,and a joy to be around.I was reading the post about if a man is really hard to find and I say one post that blowed my mind that stated the issues you have with others mirrors what you feel about yourself and that you attract how you feel about yourself.This is really scary because I have attracted no one.I use to get the hey shortie but nothing at all which is good but it like have I gotten that far gone that Im invisible. I know God has put me in his secret place so that he can do a work in me.I'm slowly day by day feeling a little better about living and wanting to have a solid future.

I have been thinking about what makes a home,about my retirement,about kids,about what type of person I can really be without baggage.I'm wanting to learn domestic stuff ie baking.I thought I would never see the day that I would want to learn about thread counts and how to make a proper home.

So ladies tell me your thought about the woman you are today and what you want to become.I have never been the marriage type because I thought that was for a certain type the pretty ones but Im starting to see that is a lie from the devil and that he wants me to isolate myself so I can continue to feel worthless,useless and to keep me from ever going forward.

 

[joy2day]

Awww Coco, I love this topic!

Truly, I can say that I am a woman in transition. I have spent many years, stuck in depression, low to no self esteem, anxiety...just a lot of baggage for a lot of reasons that I won't go into here...suffice to say that Jesus is my redeemer, and He brought me out of the pit! Praise Him!

So today, I am a woman transitioning out of all of that, and learning to love her own brand of beauty. We each have our own "brand" and we need to learn to work what God gave us individually. Collectively, there is one HUGE thing that I wish women as whole would stop doing, and that is comparing ourselves to other women and then subsequently tearing ourselves and each other down. My God, I wish we would just stop picking ourselves/each other apart! I am someone who is being prepared for leadership, and one of the major lessons that God has shown me in my preparation season is that being a leader does not mean that I have to keep you down or hide your light under a bushel, so to speak, so that my light will be the only one shinning...do you feel me here? We all have unique beauty, unique talents, unique abilities --- All given to us freely by the Father, for the edification of our husbands, families and the Kingdom as a whole. We are not in competition in the Kingdom; we need each other to survive.

So my sister, you keep developing you...walk it out...day by day...But most importantly, please know that you are truly beautiful today! You don't have to wait to become who God has already made you. When you begin to walk in beauty, you feel beautiful...when you wake up in the AM and think "God, today I want to be a woman of elegance and grace..." then guess what, that is what you will be. We choose to be the woman that we want to be, on any given day...(I found this out for myself!) There were so many days when I woke up with a lousy attitude, and guess what, I was that chick with the lousy attitude! But oh, when I allow the Lord to flood my soul, everything changes. So, I just want to encourage you where you are, because the process of becoming and being who God has called you to be is beautiful. Now, it can get tough sometimes, but the reward in the end is worth all of the struggle.

Love you Sis!